#zookeeper problems

[avesandaquatics]

Nobody talks about the walk of shame you have to do when you get into your vehicle at the end of the day and realize you still have your radio on 🥲

[sprite-and-the-bunnydragons]

so…I wanted to put a little bit about each of my murder birds penguins bc I love them

and also in case I ever say something like “Pedro screamed for five seconds straight, jumped in circles, and did a barrel roll once I sprayed him with a hose” you know this is about a penguin, not a people (I do not advise doing the above with a people, but Pedro likes it)

Bigfoot: literally has big feet. Tries to help, trips people instead. Loves boots a concerning amount. Convicted face biter.

Flower: President of Penguin HOA

Corey: would commit tax fraud if he could

Blue: nervous. Loves his wife v much and wishes she would chill

Nipper: ladies man. Possibly about to start his third penguin marriage. builds castles, not nests

Pebbles: once started a months-long war with Flower. Peb won, but her tail feathers have never grown back completely

Carla: objectively The Prettiest

Lizzie: uses rubber gloves as stress balls. While keepers are wearing them.

Big T: would drive a minivan, soccer dad

Bug: has a mile-large personal space bubble she WILL enforce

Roxie: climbed up from the depths of the underworld to eliminate humankind. Is she actually a penguin? We may never know

Beaker: stands in weird places

Poncho: absolute unit. The earth shakes when he walks. He’s not even chubby, he’s just built BIG

Peep: founder of the penguin bridge club

Cheddar: narcissist. Dolly Parton’s #1 fan

Pedro: hobbies include dancing, splashing in water, and causing problems on purpose

Chaos: name says it all. Can and will delete your kneecaps

Merlin: v good singer just does it at bad times

Bacon: prim, pretty, proper, petite until she’s hungry thEN SHE WILL EAT UNTIL HER GIRTH SMOTHERS THE SUN AND THE WORLD GROWS COLD

Monty (name subject to change): The Baby(tm). Goes through 4 stages of grief every day at not being a terrifying apex predator. We have yet to get him to the acceptance stage

Shamrock: sweetest bird, universally beloved

Hercules: Very Attractive according to the females, he and his wife would rather be left alone

Noodle: looks like she’ll explode into a pile of confetti or tears at any moment. We don’t know which. Very sweet, though

if you’ve made it this far, thanks for reading! Have one of Monty’s baby pictures:

[taysanimaladventures]

The public: tries to break down the door and hovers around the door if i dont open the aviary at exactly 10:30 and 00 seconds

Also the public: power walks through the aviary without any attempt to look for birds, then complains there are no birds

[zookeeperproblems]

Trying new food enrichment with picky animals like...

[ajaybird27]

Mysterious bruises

*notice a mystery bruise*

Most people: weird. I don’t remember bumping into anything.

Me: weird. I don’t remember getting a penguin bite there?

[justbebrave]

My voice is so annoying but damn do I love this Flamingo.

[bandarai]

30 Day Cetacean Challenge - Day 07

Do you participate in online debates?

Not really. Most of the people engaged in these are the kind of people who I have to deal with on a regular basis at work. I try and use my online world as a space to ‘get away’ most of the time, so to speak.

FYI, I work at a bird of prey centre.

Examples of things people have said to me:

“Those birds are in cages! How terrible.” 

We free fly all of our flight-capable birds every day. Your argument is invalid.

“It’s horrible that you feed that bird baby chickens/mice/rats/deer/etc.”

Oh ok sure I'll just let them die of starvation. Sure thing. Yup.

“You should just let them all out together. It would be nice for them!”

Yeaaaah. Um, you see the thing with predators...WELL. Let me introduce you to something called 'the food chain'...

“That poor barn owl is screaming! It’s so upset!”

Barn owls sound like actual devils even when they are happy. I'm sure you don’t have the voice of an angel either plz don't judge them.

This is my favourite one. “How do you train them to just sit there?”

We don’t.

That’s what birds of prey do.

They like to sit still.

They conserve energy.

SHOCKING.

[theclickerkeeper]

me talking to a family after just getting done training our giant jumping rat: Yeah he may be a rat but he's really smart he know a whole bunch of behaviors!

Mom: See, he may be gross but he's smart

me in my head: excUSE ME HE IS NOT GROSS HE IS THE CUTEST THING ON THE GODDAMN EARTH