Our therapist just told us that we only have 16 sessions left (this would last until aproximately october, depending on how many holidays etc will be inbetween) and after that, we’ll have to wait two full years until we can get more sessions, and in those two years we will only have one session a month (Zwangspause). One a month. that’s… not enough. One A WEEK doesn’t feel like it’s enough right now!
It won’t really be therapy at all. It will be “trying to put the worst of the fires out”
And just the prospect of that already messes me/us up. Putting time constraints on therapy is really counter-productive and I mean REALLY, EXTREMELY counterproductive!!!!
:’C We don’t really know what to do about his. We feel stressed and panicked and like a failure for still being sick and still needing all this help and GUILTY for needing/wanting more than we deserve and especially more than others get and why are we so slow and why do we cry so much and why don’t we pull ourselves together :’C
We’ll try to get money from the fonds for survivors of abuse but apparently they take 1.5 years to even decide one way or the other so… that’s only marginally useful. Although if we manage to do it RIGHT NOW then it might mean the difference between 2 years Zwangspause and 1 year. idk. (GUILT!!!!)
We’ll also look into going inpatient again. Apparently there’s a good clinic on the other side of the country, perhaps. It will cost the insurance company more, and won’t really be a substitute for regular therapy once a week, but idk what else to do.
We’ll have to ask how much a session costs but I’m pretty sure we couldn’t afford to pay for it ourselves.
I just feel like crying but it feels like I can no longer afford to that :(
