Every time I've put my efforts towards sobriety, one of my main, if not biggest fear, is of never getting laid again. Because, man, alcohol and sex went hand in hand for me, always. Alcohol led to sex. It led to looseness, confidence, enhanced desire, that ability to "get buck", do nutso shit, etc. Shit I could NEVER do without alcohol.
I'm the kinda kid that thoroughly enjoys racking up numbers. I guess I kind of enjoy the "sport" as well as the experience? Don't get me wrong - I'm no sex addict or anything near it- I actually consider my sex drive slightly lower than the norm... although I guess I can't say for sure what the "norm" is. Either way, what a fucking thrill, bagging a girl, givin' it to her, and getting off. Errbody love dat shit. But naturally, Alcohol was the gasoline to my vehicle. Sobriety has always seemed like it would cause it to grind to a dead halt.
Granted, I didn't get any action immediately into this sober period of mine... but after a little bit, I came to a conclusion. SINCE I CAN'T FUCKING DRINK WHETHER I LIKE IT OR NOT, I can either be an unconfident pussy and get NONE, or just get out there, shake the damn tree, and see what happens. At worst, I can make a fool of myself, which I doing regardless. Rejection happens, drunk or not. My worst rejections have all been in the midst of drinking. And, I now realize, um... I wasn't getting SHIT for a long time at one point during my drinking anyway. Best case- maybe I'll fling some fuck, yea?
It's kind of been like I've had to re-learn how to pick up women. And that took all of... one day. I got it. It's easy. Be flirty, be funny, be forward. Triple F lol... Triple F and the -uck will follow. <----(stupid as hell lol).
Anyway, 4 diff partners, 3 of them brand spankin new. And a makeout or 2 on the side, as well. In 88 days of sobriety. Perhaps not "pickup artist" numbers, but not too fucking bad in my humble opinion. Also got a few "potentials" that I haven't tapped into yet. I'm not bragging. I'm really just venting about something that really troubled me for a long time. And I must say, I'm single, sober, and happy where I am right now. Nothing lasts forever. I'm just sayin... I am growing, and grateful.