blog for my bad things

I'm not pro anything. Trigger warning for mental health hell. I switch between positive and negative frequently. Height: 5'4" SW: 140 lb CW: 135 GW: 120 UGW: 110. my main is @nekogairutomodachi

[grimetears]

if this ain’t me

[federalbureauofislam]

sorry I haven’t replied to ur texts I’ve been overwhelmed by literally anything that’s ever happened or will happen

[takenbythevoid-blog]

I dealt with some bs offline and my therapist and I got to talking and he asked me if I ever considered being a therapist (for context, we were dealing with a crisis by an internet stranger) and now I'm seriously considering it??? I was going to major in math and japanese but maybe I should psych and japanese instead. or triple major and get all three, but that'll just delay my graduation

[radsturbate]

[takenbythevoid-blog]

Me: god im so fuckin worried rn

Literally anybody: just dont be worried

Me: :) wow :) u just cured my anxiety disorder :) thank god i have u to help me in these times :)

[thexfiles]

Anxiety: look out me: for what Anxiety: look out

[anxiety-suggestions]

I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine

[ephemer-el-deactivated20181208]

I don’t think people understand that having a mental illness is literally being at war with yourself. It’s a feeling of discomfort in your own skin. It’s knowing what you should do but not being able to do it. It’s living hell and it’s not something that you can just stop.

[fierysuggestion]

progress looks different on everyone

[bonesandskinandnothingelse]

Don’t forget.

[takenbythevoid-blog]

wahahahaha I wanna fucking die again and maybe this time I would hopefully succeed in killing myself. But I'm tired and my cat is cuddled at my feet, so I feel like I can't do anything

[adhighdefinition]

in school/at work: can’t cope because it’s all too much, too many things craving attention, longing for some sweet alone time without school/work: can’t cope because no schedule, also Boredom™, if i spend one more minute alone doing nothing i’ll lose it

[batwizard]

self-harm is (but not limited to):

• making yourself sleep deprived • making yourself cold (not wearing warm clothes in the winter, sleeping without a blanket etc) • not eating • not drinking • eating too much • not looking before crossing the street • scratching • letting your skin be dry & break easily • picking at skin • over-exercising • substance abuse • over-working yourself • making yourself go out and do things even though you’re exhausted • putting yourself in anxiety-inducing situations (even if you have a choice to stay out of them) • triggering yourself • purposefully angering someone who you know will yell at you • entering relationships you don’t want to be in/being around people you don’t want to be around • having sex when you don’t want to • setting yourself punishments • not giving yourself time • not letting yourself spend time with the people you love & know will be good to you

stop assuming that self-harm is visible and easy to notice.

[ephemer-el-deactivated20181208]

if it is done in the purpose of damaging your physical, emotional, social, or spiritual health, it’s self harm

[01101010-01100100]

if i feel an emotion one more time im gonna snap

[takenbythevoid-blog]

brain: ur afraid of destroying your relationships right

me:

brain: what if u destroyed them on purpose

me:

brain: it would give u control of the situation and u wouldn't have to worry about it anymore

me:

me: go on

[healingsoft-deactivated20241218]

so she calls me sometime past 3am and chokes out that ‘i don’t remember looking this hollow where did i go where where where’ and we vow to never look in a mirror again. then we laugh and we say that if we don’t see them then our bodies don’t exist but after she goes to sleep i cut my eyelashes off because every part of me is living too loudly. we meet the next day and she’s buzzed her hair, and i know she gets it. we lie to our parents when they ask why we decided to change. i just want to be different, mom. i’m tired of washing my hair. i hate being alone but this is not the kind of thing that someone else should understand. no one else should understand. i am tired of all the empty space around me, but maybe it is better to be alone than hurting with someone else.

(catherine w // sempiternalwriting)

[takenbythevoid-blog]

me, the first time i saw a therapist: ... well i suppose theres... a couple of things from my past that have affected me? a little bit? and i guess i feel a bit lonely, im not sure why im depressed though really

me, meeting new therapists now: heres a comprehensive list of all the things that have screwed me up so far. please help me but also everyone before you has failed so good fucking luck.

[emptymaybe]

And then I realized it wasn’t the drugs, it wasn’t the sex. It wasn’t the alcohol or the rush of being free. Those aren’t my addictions, for I have one far more sinister. The overly satisfying yet drawn out, isolating addiction of destroying myself.

The best rush I’ve ever had. (via emptymaybe)