*Eternally Screaming About Bucky Barnes*

This used to be a marvel blog and I resist change Many fandoms intermittently (including but not limited to Dimension 20, Hannibal and Marvel), intersectional feminism, disability activism, humour, memes, general blog stuff ~ Was physics-and-fiction ~ Josie/Jo, 30, she/her

[mildmayfoxe]

1) any stretching is better than no stretching

2) any vegetable is better than no vegetable

3) statistically you will never be the worst person at anything, there is always someone in the world who is worse at stuff than you are

[piratewithvigor]

Just saw a bird get a worm at 8:06pm.

Never let the morning people say it can't be done

[dailynarnia]

is jake gyllenhaal gay??

why would you ask us, a narnia blog, this

[helloitsbees]

happy pride month to this post specifically

[echotunes]

(to the tone of creep by radiohead) but i'm asleep. on mypillow

[velvetys]

I plan on watching a movie at some point in the future

[dingusandpingus]

romance is a scam invented by dan and phil to sell more nordvpn subscriptions

[veggiemedleys]

see my problem is if i “listen to my body” it literally only wants to lie down and take naps, all the time

[scribefindegil]

I was in a long-term relationship that fell apart partially because I was ace and my partner was very much not, and every time we looked for relationship help we got told that I was the problem. Not just that a significant mismatch in sexual desire could be a problem in a relationship, but that it was My Fault, Specifically, for not being willing to suck it up and have a bunch of sex I didn't want. To my ex's credit, he cared about consent much more than any of the professionals we talked to and refused to pressure me even when my (lesbian, billed as progressive and pro-LGBT) therapist was actively telling him to.

But it meant that we had absolutely no help or support when we were trying to work on the relationship in ways that *did* value my autonomy. There's basically no advice for people who want to try to make a relationship where there's a big desire gap work that isn't "well you should just have sex anyway" or "just break up lol". And that sucks!

Sometimes breaking up is necessary, and that's what ended up happening with us because there were other reasons we worked better as friends, but there *should* be better frameworks for discussing what people want and need that don't automatically assume that one partner's feelings are automatically more important or valuable than the other's.

[geese-in-flight]

I was dating someone who wanted to be accommodating and work with me to figure things out but lacked the EQ to do so in any effective way. It was my first relationship and I was still figuring out what being ace meant for me. It’s been eight or nine years, but I still remember very clearly the moment I realized we’d been approaching the entire discussion as if my orientation was the problem to be solved, and that it would be equally as valid to say that hers was.

She was significantly less impressed with this revelation than I was, but I tried to hold on to it ever since (although obviously the real problem wasn’t either one of us, but the mismatch and the lack of tools to deal with it). I think it’s super important to remember that we aren’t the ones in the wrong while our theoretical partners are the ones in the right. I was surprised by how much I’d internalized the assumption and I don’t think I’m the only one.

[wingkink]

btw it's so fucking stupid you can be anxious physically in your body even after you've decided mentally you don't care. I'm supposed to be in charge here

[bebsi-cola]

health isn't a virtue.

[bebsi-cola]

people still go around acting like they've done something good in order to be able bodied and healthy. that they worked for it, that it's due to their moral fibre or good upbringing or self control. they genuinely, on some level, believe that they are a good person solely based on the strength of their physical abilities. they will resist the fact that it is largely down to chance that they were able to maintain such health. whatever they think they've built from scratch, the building blocks were already handed to them. not because they're more worthy of it, just by luck. and they really think they're worth more based on that sheer luck. i've met disabled people worth a hundred of the healthiest ableds alive.

[woodwool]

severely deficient in whatever vitamin makes u a person

[ciqqy]

I will lock in tomorrow like nobody has ever locked in before

[ciqqy]

[manipulated-pieces]

Why is it easier and more comfortable to sit in a position that actively damages my joints than it is to just sit with okay posture. Why does my body crave its own destruction

[sugared-violetts]

does anyone know how to go to sleep

[kaijuno]

[tsunderebird]

[willemdaflutist]

[my-dailydreams]

[fatfemme-inist]

If you have a friend that wants to vent to you but doesn't want solutions but you are a solutions-oriented person, may I suggest Silly Solutions (TM)? For instance, whenever my friend complains about the people at her job being dumb, I remind her that if only one of us had studied engineering, we could create a giant hippo robot with laser eyes to destroy them. It fulfills my need to offer a solution, doesn't violate her boundary of not wanting to problem solve, AND it cheers us both up!