hear me out: natsume sakasaki, angst or h/c. how would he deal with his feelings not being requited? how would it affect him?
you are so evil for requesting this >:( /lh
natsume + unrequited love
reader : gender neutral, no pronouns used
type : headcanons
warnings : ANGST NO COMFORT. unrequited love (you dont like natsume back)
word count : 280
appearances are very important to natsume. he’s extremely aware of how he’s perceived, and he has a front on nearly all the time. he has an image to maintain both onstage and off – it’s only very rarely that anyone gets to see the boy underneath it all.
he lets the facade slip with you, just a little. it’s an experiment to see how you’d react. would you accept him? would you think he’s… disappointing? he needs to know, if he’s going to place his heart in your hands. you’re so important to him after all.
so when all’s said and done, and it’s clear that his feelings aren’t reciprocated, there’s a part of him that feels… betrayed. not by you, not by anyone else, but himself.
he’s betrayed himself. he gets to feel both the guilt of the sinner and the anger of a boy who unfortunately fell in love – is that such a crime? – and it almost renders him paralysed.
natsume’s emotional walls stretch to the clouds – he trusts his own judgement more than anything. he took a calculated gamble letting his walls down with you, but it turned out to be fruitless. useless.
yet he’ll try to act like he always does around you. shrug off every memory of a longing look or a fleeting touch he had given you. push away a daydream about holding your hand and feeling your warm cheek underneath the pads of his fingers. well, that’s just how things are, aren’t they? he can’t make you love him.
so he tells himself that he can easily get over you. you were just a silly little crush, nothing more.
and yet he can’t help the pang in his heart when he sees your sweet smile.
hello my little friend :) i'll start nice. can i request some fluff with alkaloid? platonic or romantic, up to you <3
hello gayass :) i hope you read these and explode (affectionate) :3 i would say these lean towards romantic but aira’s and mayoi’s could be seen as platonic <3
alkaloid + fluff
reader : gender neutral, no pronouns used, reader bakes in tatsumi's scenario
type : scenarios
warnings : none
word count : 1024... yeah i kinda got carried away
a pleasant shiver runs from the back of your head to the base of your spine as you rouse from your slumber. you yawn softly, nuzzling into the warmth pressed against your cheek, and stilling in surprise when the warmth hugs you back.
“you’re awake?” you feel the rumble of hiiro’s voice in his chest before you hear it. you make a noncommittal sound – not really saying something or the other, just letting him know you’re awake – and readjust your head, your ear pressed to his chest. hiiro hums and moves a hand to your shoulder, squeezing softly. the two of you fall into a comfortable silence.
the strong, steady thump of his heart makes you smile, and you close your eyes in an attempt to hear it better. “are you trying to fall asleep again?” hiiro asks, an audible smile in the lilt of his voice. your answering silence has him chuckling, and strong arms pull you to a sitting position beside him. “it’s a new day! you can’t go back to sleep now – we’ve got so much to do!” the sweet smile hiiro gives you makes something burst in your chest, filling it with warmth. maybe waking up isn’t so bad if you get to see that smile.
maybe waking up isn’t so bad if he’ll be here with you again as you drift off tonight.
aira, mayoi and tatsumi below the cut!
“waa~ that was so cool!” you can practically see the sparkles around aira as he wears a content, closed-eye smile.
he’d been looking forward to this live for weeks, and gushing about it for even longer. it was held by a fairly new unit – he had rambled to you about it once over lunch – but it had become somewhat of an overnight sensation. the day he had gotten the tickets, aira had come running to you, holding out a ticket and asking with wide eyes if you’d like to go with him. you had accepted, so now here you are, linking arms with the boy as you amble along the pavement.
“did you enjoy it?”
you don’t think it’s possible for him to look any happier, but your assurance that yes, you did enjoy it very much has him clapping his hands and bouncing in glee. the scene makes something soft blossom in your chest, expanding to fill your ribs and escaping you as an amused laugh.
“you know, i’m glad you don’t comment much on how much i like idols,” he starts, fiddling with the keychains on his bag. “most people are surprised that an idol likes idols so much, and say some weird things about it. but you just accept it as a part of me, a-and let me talk about them… uh, did i say something wrong?” he blinks at your wide-eyed expression as you try not to burst into tears at his admission. or grab him and shake him like a maraca.
the best you can do is aggressively reassure him that you’ll always listen to him talk about his interests. his resulting laugh has your face lighting up as well. “does that mean you’ll come with me to more lives?”
“wh-what are you doing!?”
mayoi, after much coaxing, has finally agreed to put his head in your lap. even so, he refuses to put his full weight on you – my sins may be too much for you to bear! – choosing instead to hold himself above you, muscles tensed. you had just ghosted your fingers over his hair when he had gasped, pulling his shoulders up to his ears as if trying to hide in his shell.
i’m playing with your hair, you say matter-of-factly, and he whimpers at the thought of your hand on his scalp. “you can’t!” he protests weakly. “i – you’ll be tainted!”
by what, mayoi, you ask, before switching tactics. you assure him that it’s alright, that you want to do this. nothing’s gonna happen to you. nothing’s gonna happen to anyone. your determination is rewarded when he eventually relents, his face hidden in his hands as you undo the ribbon holding his braid.
the first contact of your fingertips against his scalp sends a shudder down his spine, a soft sob escaping him. you smile softly as you continue your ministrations, carding your fingers through his long strands. you admire how well-maintained his hair is… the colour, the texture... and before you know it, he’s completely relaxed, fully resting his head in your lap.
he sighs contentedly, almost nuzzling his head into your hand like a cat. soon enough, his breathing evens out and you know he’s fallen asleep. be sure to savour every moment now – you’d want to be able to assure him that this was nice when he wakes up apologetic, right?
you feel a warm pair of arms wrap around your waist from behind. the sudden contact makes you stiffen a little, but the gentle press of tatsumi’s lips against your cheek has you almost melting in his arms.
“they look delicious," he says, referring to the sheet of cookies you're about to put in the oven. you laugh – that's uncooked dough, tatsumi, you'll get sick – and he chuckles in response. "my point still stands," he remarks. "i can hardly wait until they're ready to eat."
you feel tatsumi's soft gaze on you as you place the tray in the oven. growing flustered, you buy time by fussing over the temperature, hoping that he'll look away...
...which does not work. when you stand up and turn to face him, tatsumi's right in front of you, his smile so filled with adoration that it makes something twist in your chest. he takes your hands in his, and you slowly begin to dance to a silent song – a song composed just for the two of you, heard only by the two of you.
the aroma of your baked goods wafts through the air. you let out a flustered laugh and for a second he feels as if he’s reverted to a grinning, blushing, lovestruck boy. the lights in the kitchen are far from flattering, but to tatsumi? he swears you have never looked more beautiful than in this moment, right between his arms.
what if I cried. what if I stood in my kitchen by myself and cried while staring at my phone. jes you are one of the sweetest people on this planet I would move heaven and earth for you
