aching blush.

i push up on my toes, you call me "sweet thing" and breathing down your neck, your body s c r e a m i n g . and you thought that you were the boss tonight, but i can put up one good FIGHT. i flip the script like i can take a beating.

[tegvn-blog1]

all this talk of getting old; it’s getting me down.

@kvdens//@lvurels 

she's eight again.

or at least, she feels like it.  she remembers shoving her hand down the pack of the couch to feel for spare change, anything that she could contribute to the heating bill. the apartment had been cold and empty for days. not empty in the literal sense, the ghosts of tegan and her mum had been living there. barely colliding, barely coexisting. she remembers the day ian and judith swooped in to save the day, how it felt to curl up in front of the warm to a fireplace and to finally have a home.

at seventeen it finally hit her that judith and ian were old, worn down down by the life they had before she came along. they wouldn't be around forever and one day she'd have to fend for herself; skipping out on classes and failing her final year of high school wasn't going to lead her to a life off self-sufficiency. laurel became her lifeline, more so than what she'd been over the past five years. and when tegan found out she was graduating and the first thing she did was land a kiss on the lips of the girl she'd been crazy about for the past six years ?  she felt more at peace than she ever had in her life.

the past four years of her life had been the best. meeting kaden, falling in love all over again. when home stopped being soft blankets out of a dryer and became the arms of the girl that she loved and a boy that was too beautiful to be in her life. she never imagined that it'd all be replaced with 300 square feet of emptiness. 

tegan was the glue. while it was kaden and laurel and tegan, it'd first been tegan and laurel and later on tegan and kaden. she wasn't valuing her importance over either of them, she knew they had a love for one another but she also knew that it wasn't the same as what they shared with her. sometimes she thought if they were all on the same level together it would've been easier. that’s what made leaving so hard.

she'd been gone for a month and she was cracking, her fingertips hovered over the call button every night when she curled up in a bed that was too big for just one person. it'd been over a month since she'd heard either of their voices and the longer that it went on the more she worried she'd forget. tonight would be different, though. she couldn't live like this anymore. dialing the familiar number of her home -- their home -- she hadn't even thought of what she intended to say, her breath hitching when the ridiculous ringing sound cut off.

‘ i'm sorry. ’

[tegvn-blog1]

lvurels.

kvdens:

tired. kaden was so, so tired. it’d been an exceptionally long day and the clock hadn’t even hit 4 in the afternoon yet. he wanted nothing more than to slip under the sheets in bed and sleep until the next day, but considering his working day wasn’t yet finished that wasn’t an option. he was thankful for the break, though. a chance to go home and unwind a little bit before he returned to his next client. entering the warmth of the apartment, his gaze immediately settled on tegan. she looked soft. happy. and definitely not the type of person he wanted to unload all his woes of the day on. “hi love,” he greeted, toeing off his shoes before he entered the room to join her. he too sat on the floor, however used the couch as a means to keep himself propped up. “how’s your day been?”

she sometimes thinks the problem might be that she doesn’t love herself because all the love in her body is for other people. tegan, specifically. of course she loves kaden, it’s just in a different way. the brunette sprawled out on the floor is her soulmate, the man trying so hard to look alive beside the couch is her life partner.it was the sound of kaden entering the house that pulled her from the depths of her studies, deciding she really ought to greet the pair for the first time that day. “hi flower,” she hummed, a lazy smile on her face as she eyed her girlfriend. she entered the room and immediately moved to the man, dropping down beside him but not without pressing a kiss to the top of his head in greeting. “it’s been quiet in here all day, what’ve you been doing?” the way her hand reached out to beckon tegan closer was pure instinct, something she couldn’t ignore.

them being all together on their living room floor with a perfectly good couch sitting empty is a sight that makes tegan ridiculously happy. it's such a them thing. the only issue is that neither kaden or laurel look quite right -- for reasons she doesn't know why. she forced her lips to turn upwards as she moved closer to the pair, settling herself in the other female's lap in such a way so that she could shove her toes underneath kaden's thigh. ‘ it's been quiet, ’  she finally answered her boyfriend's initial question, looping the arm closet to laurel around her to rest on the couch behind her. ‘ i haven't done anything. cuddled daisy for a whole hour before she got annoyed at me, which i think is a feat that should be celebrated.’  she felt the need to be lighthearted, internally concerned by the dull appearance of both of her lovers. ‘ is  -- you both look tired. what’s up ? ’

[tegvn-blog1]

@kvdens // @lvurels

tegan had been lying in the center of the living room floor for the better part of an hour, delicate fingers working through the fur on the ball of fluff that'd settled on her stomach. truthfully, she'd have a few new scratches added to her vast collection from a predictable petting pattern or a too rough rub at the cat's ears. daisy had never really been one for affection, so the fact she'd been curled against her owner for so long was the first sign to the brunette that something was off about that day. she believed animals had some sort of sixth sense about impending bad being on it's way. she hadn't shared her worry yet, despite the fact laurel was home. she'd been hauled up in the study ever since she'd climbed out of bed that morning and tegan knew better than to disturb her. especially over something she had no solid proof about. the sharp sting of claws digging in to her tummy was the only warning she received before the creature was darting off of her, the sound of a key slipping into the lock at their front door quickly following. she let out the slightest of winces, her muscles disagreeing with the sudden movement, as she rolled onto her stomach to greet the newest occupant of the apartment. ‘ hey, baby. ’

[radiatelovez]

Visit Original Link

[tegvn-blog1]

hey hey !!!  i’m lu and i am somehow running this roleplay, though barely tbh because i am Mess. anyway, i’m eighteen and i come from a, surprisingly as of recent, sunny place called scotland !!  i’m eighteen and i prefer they/them or she/her pronouns. i just recently ( like last week ) dropped out of university and my job isn’t too demanding, so i have way too much free time on my hands and intend to spend most of it writing out the loml, tegan. i don’t have a biography written yet because it’s been a minute since i’ve used her, though there are some short points below the read more until i get to that !!

you can find statistics for her here ( i still need to fix the dimensions, i told you i am a mess !!! ) and i’m working on a wc page, though i do love brainstorming.

oh, did i just see DANIELLE CAMPBELL walk by ?  maybe not, it has been said that TEGAN LAWSON, the TWENTY ONE year old CISFEMALE student that studies FILM AND MEDIA looks a bit like them. i’ve heard they’re TRANQUIL & SOLICITOUS but maybe a little RESERVED & PARADOXICAL. it’s probably best to ask their roommate in apartment B26 because they’ll probably know what SHE is like best!

tegan was raised by her grandparents because her mother was deemed unfit to care for her and her father was never in the picture. it's not something that bothers her, it's just a thing.

she's originally from charleston in south carolina but she's been in monroe for the past two and a half years. she moved into the apartment block a little before she started at the university. 

a lil bit religious but also real lowkey n not that dedicated to it, she just went to church a lot as a kid bc of her grandparents

she's studying film and media - her life goal is to become a director. 

tegan is dyslexic. in high school that was a huge issue because she never really received any of the support that she needed. that meant she actually ended up cheating on tests where possible and spent her last two summers doing all sorts of extra credit to even allow her to pass well enough to get into a college.

however, now she gets all of the additional help that she needs.

she wants to be a good person but she can be a bit ditsy and say the wrong thing, primarily without thinking. 

still, she's pretty calm and collected most of the time. she can keep herself to herself for the first few meetings between her and someone new but it just takes a little time to get her out of her shell. 

once she is fairly comfortable with someone she can be, for lack of a better expression, the literally definition of the Mom friend… idk how else to put it, she just wants to take care of everyone around her (even if she has NO idea how to take care of herself) and i guess that can maybe get a little overbearing sometimes.

that's really just in the sense she'd much rather make sure everyone around her is all good and chill and she'd really rather not talk about herself.

[theanimalmemes]

[teamdaniellecam]

[jakegyllenhaal]

[certasluas]

[louellenews]

[misswallflower]

Her voice left a flavor of honey and gunpowder on the air.

Peter S. Beagle  (via babydollxkitten)

[tegvn-blog1]

-- tag drop !!