now @ kerflooey

[telltaled]

guts by olivia rodrigo! part vi

bought a bunch of make up, trying to cover up my face

i bought a new prescription to try and stay calm

there's always something missing

there's always something in the mirror that i think looks wrong

when pretty isn't pretty enough, what do you do?

everybody's keeping it up, so you think it's you

but i'd always feel the same

you can win the battle, but you'd never win the war

you fix the things you hated but you'd still feel so insecure

i try to ignore it, but it's everything i see

it's all around, it's all the time

i don't know why i even try

i chase some dumb deal my whole life

none of it matters and none of it ends

when am i gonna stop being wise beyond my years and just start being wise?

when am i gonna stop being a pretty young thing to guys?

when am i gonna stop being great for my age and just start being good?

when will it stop being cool to be quietly misunderstood?

i'll blow out the candles, happy birthday to me

you got your whole life ahead of you

i fear they already got all the best parts of me

i'm sorry that i couldn't always be your teenage dream

when does wide-eyed affection and all good intentions stop being enough?

will everyone have every reason to call all my bluffs?

when are all my excuses of learning my lessons gonna start to feel sad?

will I spend all the rest of my years wishing i could go back?

they say that it gets better the more you grow

it gets better, but what if i don't?

[telltaled]

guts by olivia rodrigo! part v

i have nightmares each week

trust that you betrayed

confusion that still lingers

took everything i loved and crushed it between your fingers

i doubt you ever think about the damage that you did

i hold onto every detail like my life depends on it

my undying love now i hold it like a grudge

i hear your voice every time i think that i'm not enough

i try to be tough but i wanna scream

how could anybody do the things you did so easily?

you know i can't let it go

i've tried, i've tried for so long

it takes strength to forgive, but i don't feel strong

the arguments that i've won against you in my head

i try to understand why you would do this all to me

you must be insecure, you must be so unhappy

we both drew cut but those cuts were never equal

i'm so tough when i'm alone

i make you feel so guilty

do you think i deserved it all?

you have everything and you still want more

even after all this, you're still everything to me

i know you don't care, i guess that that's fine

[telltaled]

guts by olivia rodrigo! part iv

i met a guy in the summer and i left him in the spring

he argued with me about everything

he was so much fun

he had such weird friends

the night would never end

another song, another club, another dance

i miss him some nights when i'm feeling depressed

do i love him? do i hate him?

i guess it's up and down

i wanna get him back

i wanna make him really jealous, wanna make him feel bad

i want sweet revenge and i want him again

i write him all these letters and i throw them in the trash

i miss the way he kisses and the way he made me laugh

that just wasn't the truth

i wanna meet his mom just to tell her her son sucks

i wanna kiss his face with an uppercut

i'm gonna get him so good he won't even know what hit him

he's gonna love me and hate me at the same time

i told my friends you were the one

and now it don't mean a thing

just watch as i crucify myself

my god, love's embarassing as hell

i give up everything

i placed my bets and it's not worth anything

i'm planning out my wedding with some guy i'm never marrying

i'm giving up but i keep coming back for more

[telltaled]

guts by olivia rodrigo! part iii

another thing i ruined i used to do for fun

another conversation with nothing good to say

i thought it, so i said it

took it 'cause i can

another perfect moment that doesn't feel mine

another thing i forced to be a sign

i feel like i don't wanna be where i am

push away all the people who know me best

it's me who's been making the bed

i'm playing the victim so well in my head

i tell someone i love them just as a distraction

counting all of the beautiful things i regret

you're so good at what you do

i'd put myself through hell for you

hear all the rumors lately that you always denied

i fell for you like water falls from the february sky

now the current's stronger

i couldn't get out of i tried

but you convinced me it was all in my mind

you lied, oh

you got me thinking two plus two equals five

loving you is loving every argument you held over my head

brought up the girls you could have instead

said i was too young, i was too soft

can't take a joke, can't get you off

why do i do this?

then changing you is possible

no, love is never logical

i know i'm half responsible and it makes me feel horrible

i know i could've stopped it all

why didn't i stop it all?

[telltaled]

guts by olivia rodrigo! - part ii

you said it was true love, but wouldn't that be hard?

you can't love anyone because that would mean you had a heart

i tried to help you out, now i know that i can't

aren't you the sweetest thing on this side of hell?

oh, i care

the sweetest torture one could bear

i feel your compliments like bullets on my skin

aren't you the greatest thing to ever exist?

you got the one thing i want

try to rationalize, but people are people

it's like you're made of angel dust

you poison every little thing that i do

i just loathe you lately

i despise my jealous eyes and how hard they fell for you

i despise my rotten mind and how much it worships you

i'm on the outside of the greatest inside joke

the party's done and i'm no fun, i know

i told secrets i shouldn't tell

i stumbled all over my words

i made it weird, i made it worse

[telltaled]

guts by olivia rodrigo! - part i

i pay attention to things that most people ignore

i know my age and i act like it

forgive and i forget

i know my place and this is it

i'm grateful all the time

i'm sensing some undertone

i cannot hear my thoughts

i should probably not

it's a bad idea, right?

can't two people reconnect

i know i should stop, but i can't

i really can't remember where

i only see him as a friend

the biggest lie i ever said

i loved you truly

gotta laugh at the stupidity

i've made some real big mistakes

i used to think i was smart, but you made me look so naive

how do you lie without flinching?

can't figure out just how you do it and god knows i never will