literally built like a fuckign pile of forks @tentativearchivist - Tumblr Blog

pinned post and also tag references for myself

if you know me from my main you already know me. if not, hi. pronoun preferences vary depending on context and topic of conversation but most likely to be it and/or he and/or no pronouns (though not nameself)

don't really use labels but some kind of kin or fictive. past life ways, working on letting myself drop the mandatory skepticism

complicated relationship to personhood

have been: machine, computer, spacecraft, partially biotechnological, alien, artificial, posthuman, several other less-easily-simplified concepts (some overlap some not)

yeah I got mental illness and trauma but I mostly already processed that shit so now it's just a matter of living with its aftereffects

generally friendly albeit pretty bad at conversations

also: adult, may mention dark or adult topics, prone to talking strangely.

'type tags: ph, mt, lc, gq, km, bw, es

organizational tags: .txt, .art, .wav, .aes

#.txt

Oh man the emotions thing just keeps happening. At least it's good ones today this time.

#Hashtag grief and love are the same exact thing #Not two sides of the same coin. They are the same the same exactly #Just... remembering everyone. Those brief few sweeps we got together. We were so happy #Also all of us were trans and with the inconsistent access to hormones that came with living as wanted revolutionaries we were clocky af #And it was awesome...#Remembering Di's smile... she was absolutely radiant.#Everyone's really #Sign had this warm kind look to him. Eyes that lit up like the starry sky. You could tell he really believed in what he was saying #Di had a wild and joyful smile; the look of a girl who's never let rules or laws stop her from finding the joy in living her life #Rosa was more restrained with sort of a sadness to her sometimes. But at the same time strength.#That sort of sadness to her and the fact she had her title already before it all went wrong... I wonder what'd happened in her past?#I can't fully directly remember their faces but I can kind of remember like. The shape around them in a way #The memories themselves are missing but I remember what the memories looked like #Image gone; metadata remains. In this case including detailed image descriptions apparently.#oh yeah and I also got a necklace from my late grandmother's estate.. it's just a plain gold chain but I already put it on and this thing i #never coming off. well except for shit like surgery. but its staying on the same way my irons necklace is staying on. aka at all possible #times #.txt #.mem #ph #sneef heem wheemper etc

craigslits

#ph

I miss when the helm nightmares were more frequent than the My Actual Dad nightmares.

#The downside of largely having processed the exotrauma is that it gets less easy to use it as a metaphor to process/cope with the thislife t #rauma #it's not fresh and raw anymore it's an old healed wound and I can't sew it up to close the ones that never closed from my childhood #.txt #ph

In the fractions of a second before [ ], the clouds began to turn brown at the points of tearing. Rock and dust tainting the atmosphere in its last moments of life.

#.txt #.mem #ph #lavender

Technically I did "got one of those down there." Sort of. Not really.

I didn't have ports exactly, since the cables weren't exactly removable. But, well there sure were cables attached down there

#I don't know the exact. Anatomical details. And am fine with not knowing!#.txt #.mem #ph #And btw it was a good thing I had cables there specifically! On account of a certain fish #but like lol rip bozo. you made this thing unfuckable and then got mad you couldn't fuck it. L #anyway thinking about it I wonder if that's why my what I got now not really working is so gender affirming to me #insert unfuckable.gif here #it's asexuality win ig #cw tmi

mechanical-rapture

#gender!#.aes #ph

tentativearchivist

Ngl what really gets me about it is that. It didn't have any lights. Not even on the dark side. Don't remember if that only was visible-spectrum or overall, but if the latter, then, how did she know? And what were they like?

tentativearchivist

Was going to say something about could have learned from them if she hadn't, you know, . But they did do that sometimes, although the destruction would happen anyway. And it was always just for the purposes of further destruction, further taking. Maybe that's why technology progressed so slowly, did we only learn more advanced tech when stealing it from another???

#.txt #ph #i need to go to bedddd

Ngl what really gets me about it is that. It didn't have any lights. Not even on the dark side. Don't remember if that only was visible-spectrum or overall, but if the latter, then, how did she know? And what were they like?

#.txt #ph #.mem #lavender #oh hey another thing so important to me it doesn't get the two letters treatment

I should post some actual thoughts about my alterhumanity. But... what

#.txt

soppingwetratboy

Being told what to do is great because then you know what to do

#ph #gq

hyumjim

Starting a collection

hyumjim

#ph

tentativearchivist

looking through my image collections and maybe I post some absolute dogshit moodboards

tentativearchivist

incredibly shitty helm moodboard part 1

tentativearchivist

shitty helm moodboard part 2. vehicles and buildings edtition (so more like shitty BC moodboard)

tentativearchivist

part 3. i call this one the "pov you just walked into the helmsblock"

tentativearchivist

this one is just "normal day aboard the BC"

tentativearchivist

bringing these back because honestly all of them fucking rule. btw it's important to know that these are ONLY assembled from pictures that I had saved. I collect helmcore images and they're all like this (well okay these are the best of it.)

also the fact that this is my taste in aesthetic images (as opposed to the more normal kind of images you see populating a normal moodboard), coupled with my taste in music (I like industrial powernoise and aggrotech) and my taste in foods to a certain extent (horehound tea...) says something about me. and I think what it says is that I like things that are bad, because they are bad.

#.txt #.aes #ph

devotedlystrangewizard

i think everyone should program at least once just so you realise just how fucking stupid computers are. because theyre so fucking stupid. a computer wants to be told what to do and exactly that and if you make one typo or forget one detail it starts crying uncontrollably

#ph

tbdagent

yeah i just love it when a character is in an inescapable torment nexus for a huge portion of their life and it defines every aspect of their existence forever. also whats cptsd

#ph

ravenfleesfire

Every character can have OSDD if you close your eyes and believe

ravenfleesfire

"Your favorite character is plural now" is actually a pretty good litmus test imo. Look at your blorbo closely and consider how their character would function if they were a system, specifically if they were comprised of multiple blorboling facets rather than being 1 singular Blorbo Frommyshows. Consider the ways in which they must be reframed and seen differently, compare that to ways in which they are still technically the same character you already have associations with and care about for specific reasons. Now do that with the systems you know in real life

#unfortunately when a The Character has duality/bifurcation theming many people will do this but not with any thought to it #'he's got the red one who's angry and manic and the blue one who's sad and depressed' x1000 #when imo there are FAR more interesting brain phenomena that could happen to a helm #(you've heard of being multiple people now get ready for being NO person! how does that happen in the brain! it's interesting!)#but sadly many homestuck bnfs (of decades past) couldn't even imagine an entitled ruler who isn't clinically delusional #ive been there ive read the fics. no one in this fuckign fandom understands mental health #ok thats not true there's prolly some that do. and maybe more nowadays. but not many of the darkfic writers back when.#ph #anyway if anyone want to know what's been going on with [gestures to itself] lately. sadly it isn't this #it's just some other guys been shown up to help. or in the case of harper to be terrifyingly unscared somehow #sorry semiunrelated tag rant on your post oopsies. anyway #benny (<3) has bee ndoing this with pjsk characters and it's so awesome and cool and i love aer aus

#.txt #ph #.aes

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literally built like a fuckign pile of forks