numb

isabella moreno;  forget what you thought 'cause good girls are bad girls that haven't been caught

[lamerpc]

D om nodded at her proposal, and held out his hand for her to take, wiggling his fingers as he grinned down at her. He was a bit distressed at her small reply to the whole speech he had come up with, but still proud of the fact she hadn’t regarded him completely, or left him stranded in the dust. The treehouse idea took him for a loop as a whole new wave of memories came flooding back.

W hiskey escapades and tearful nights were among the singular rememberances, and more overflowed his consiousness. Ariel and Flounder sat huddled around a lamp, counting Reese’s and Twixes, a full moon hanging above their heads after a night of persuading rich old women to give them more candy than the children previous. When spring rolled around one year, the pair had spent a whole afternoon picking dandelions and freshly potted daisies. Eventually, a housewife caught them, and scolded them for ruining her flowers. Minutes after she left, they took her roses as well.

E very small moment in time he had spent with her was something he had subconsiously stored deep within his brain, and what he still did to this day. He was more than satisfied with each one, though, and wasn’t complaining at all.

D om stepped forward, his arm still outstretched towards her, and he spoke softly. His mind was reeling, and in all honesty, he just wanted to scream how much he cared for her. Every insecurity or doubt she had he wanted to condradict with kisses, or the simple three word phrase he had spent weeks rolling over his tongue, just to test out how it would feel when he said it to her in the future. He bit his lip, and smiled with a fondness so warm it could roast a marshmallow, the curve of his lips because of her.

" I 'd love to.” 

[tfwisabella]

S he didn't mean for her breath to noticeably hitch when he outstretched his wiggling fingers towards her, which were currently shaking and hiding in her jacket sleeve. Matter of fact, she didn't mean to show any sign of nervousness, especially because this behavior was so unlike her. The inside of her cheek was being harshly gnawed by her teeth and she wasn't sure if she even knew how to correctly respond to any affection that was shown towards her. Although she didn't really have time to respond, since a hall monitor turned around the corner and shouted towards the duo to get to class. Brown hues met green as she finally intertwine her fingers with his and ran in front of him towards the school doors, leading him behind with their hands still connected. Of course, this hadn't been the first time they had one this, but it was definitely never in a situation like this. She couldn't help but let breathy laughs fall from her now smiling lips as they tried to lose the hall monitor. They finally lost her when they approached the courtyard (it's not like she was very fast).

" I t's weird to say that's not the first time we've done something like that." Another chuckle escaped her mouth as she bent over, trying to catch her breath. Her laughter finally ended with a sigh, and she swallowed when she realized that her hand was still in his. The brunette disconnected their fingers quickly and stood up straight. She couldn't be happier that her house was so close to the high school and nodded her head in that direction, beginning to walk in front of him. 

[tfwdom]

     E ven with the crowd’s that had appeared in the hallway, Dom was certain he could hear her greeting over the mindless buzz. However, as she walked forward, the brunette noticed how they were gradually starting to thin out, leaving him alone with her. He felt awfully vulnerable, but he couldn’t help the grin that lit up his face as she neared. The bell was due to ring any minute, and although he would miss band, Dom made no move to get to his class.

     W hen she stared at her shoes, the boy took his chance, and regrouped all of the confidence he had mustered up over the last few hours. He felt it, metaphorically, course through his nerves, and finally allow himself to start to speak. However, his possible words were cut off by Isabella’s small speech. It wasn’t like he was complaining, though. He would listen to her for days if she let him.

      D om hung onto every single word that fell from her lips, analyzing each phrase as it transitioned into the next. Was she really comparing him to the Italian dude? The same guy she spent months crushing on? It astonished him to think he could have that effect on her. His heart was nearly beating out of his chest, and he felt like a swarm of angry bumblebees had built a home in his stomach. As she finished speaking, the built up confidence allowed words to spill out.

     ” I don’t want you to be nervous around me, Isabella,” He began, returning his gaze to his heavy black combat boots. “You were crazy about him. Did you know I was crazy about you? God, I was just as pathetically in love with you as you were infatuated with him.” Taking a dep breath, he continued his quiet declaration.

     ” A nd, I don’t know if you knew, but I still am. But, it’s not infatuation —- it’s something deeper; I know it is. I’ve known you for, what, six years? That’s probably more than Mr. Italy has known English. But, I know that this could be something, and I want it so bad.”

     ” G ive me a chance.”

[tfwisabella]

I f Isabella had gone back a few years and told younger Isabella about the conversation that as going on between herself and Dom right now, younger Isabella would've slapped her right in the face. Never in a million years would she see herself falling as hard as she was, but it was happening --- no matter how hard she tried to make it go away. But never in a million years had she ever imagined Dom feeling the way he was confessing to her. What he was telling her right now was that he had been pathetically in love with her for the past few years --- apparently more than her schoolgirl crush a few years ago knew how to speak English, which made Isabella laugh out loud, which (even to her own mind's protest) made her fall even harder for the taller boy.

H er mouth managed to curl up into a hazy smile as she leaned onto the locker, crossing her right foot behind her left. Before she could get out any other words, the tardy bell rung, causing her to jump. She looked around at the empty hallways, and realized that this probably wasn't the best place to be doing this. Not only would they both get in trouble for skipping class if they were to be caught by a teacher, but someone like Havana happened to stumble upon them. Havana. Now that she thought about it, their friend had dropped small hints about Dom having feelings for the girl, but Isabella was way too oblivious to realize it until now.

" L et's go to the treehouse." The treehouse. It seemed like the only place appropriate. There were memories held in the old, wooden box shaped "house" that sat on top of the biggest tree in Isabella's backyard that went back as far as middle school. Like the time that the pair had stolen a bottle of whiskey from the gas station and ran as fast as they could to the tree house, spending the rest of the night pouring things out to each other. Or the time after the drama with her parents happened and she spend the whole night crying on his shoulder. The thought of these memories made her realize that maybe they were meant to be something more, and maybe she should give him a chance. But as much as she wanted to, something deep inside of her was telling her to stop being so dumb.

[tfwdom]

     D ominic hadn’t slept at all that night.

     T here were hideously dark circles under his eyes that he had carelessy wiped over with a shade of concealer that more matched the snow than his own tan skin. He was wearing one blue sock and the other, pink with purple polka dots. To be honest, he looked like a train wreck.

     H e blamed it on Isabella.

     O f course, it wasn’t like he was angry. The brunette could never be angry with her, no matter how hard he tried. Instead, he was feeling more frustrated than anything. Dom had spent the whole night staring at the screen of his phone, and flicking through the album he had made, filled with pictures of everyone that meant something to him. However, the boy only stared at pictures of her. The cause of his late night catastrophy.

     I t contained numerous photographs, polaroids, and mementos that he had gathered over the course of his freshman and sophmore year. There was a reciept from a date night their close knit group had, and somehow Dom had ended up paying for. It took him three months to pay back his parent’s for their ‘donation’. Another item inside was a crumpled note that was once thrown at him from behind, obviously from Havana. It had stated that they were no longer friends, just because Dom hadn’t given the younger his chocolate milk at lunch. From Isabella, a label from a bottle of Coke, that on the backside had a gooey lipstick stain, along with a cheesy message from a day spent at a music festival they had snuck into.

     T he polaroids held moments frozen in time — some portraying late nights at the beach where Dom and Isabella had been harassed by a gang of pigeons. A different square pictured the duo tango’ing inside a McDonald’s, where they were later kicked out from when they had belted out an opera version of Justin Bieber’s classic ‘Baby’. Dom’s favorite, though, was a candid. It was of a dared kiss between the friends at a bonfire on the boardwalk, taken by an anonymous comrade he was entirely grateful for.

     B efore the bonfire, Dom had pushed aside every feeling he had for the girl. He had told himself that she would never feel the same way he did, and someone like her was simply too good for him. Forcing away every hope, Dom faked a platonic relationship and prayed to no one in particular that the emotion that was driving him insane would pass.

     H owever, the kiss changed everything. When her lips touched his, he felt as if he was melting. The fact that it was a joke didn’t amount to the way his heart felt like it was beating out of his chest, or how he couldn’t feel anything except Isabella’s embrace. Even as he laid in his bed after their argument, he could still picture the stars that stuck out against the dark curtain, or the way the lull of the waves that struck the shore contrasted with the snapping of the fire. So, as he sat in his first period class, the memory of a night that he could never forget still hung in his ears.

     D om had to will hemself to not turn around and make jokes with Isabella, like he normally would. Instead, the drone of the lesson was what he made himself pay attention to. Mindless phrases and pointless dates blocked out the otherwise constant thoughts that occupied his mind, up until the bell released the class.

     T he boy’s first idea was to corner her in the room to properly talk it out, but when their teacher called her back, his plan was cut short. The next best thing, though, was to wait at one place he knew she had to visit.

     S tanding next to her locker, he chewed on his lip as every stratagem he had concoted seemed to scatter throughout his brain. And, as he saw her exit the classroom out of the corner of his eye, it felt like he had gone brain dead.  But, when she stationed herself in the middle of the hallway, instead of making her way to her locker he panicked. Gripping onto the possiblity of a new gossip trend that could sweeping among their small group of friends, he called out to her.

     ”Isabella ! ! “

[tfwisabella]

     T here were a lot of things Isabella wished for at this particular moment. She wished this was like any other time when he would be standing at her locker. She wished that she could walk up to him and exclaim how he was rocking the miss-matched socks. She wished she hadn't fucked it up. She wished she was better. She wished she could do this.

   W hen her name was called out from the mouth of the boy, she couldn't help but lose her breath. It still confused her how she could be so i n f a t u a t e d, but at the same damn time just the sight of him made her want to run and hide. 

   I f this had been any normal day, she would look at him with a smile on her face and she would practically skip to wherever he was. But this wasn't a normal day, and as much as she wanted to, she couldn't pretend it was. The arguing began again and she chewed viciously at her bottom lip as it began. It was the same shit over and over again--- one would say she could do it, and the other would say the complete opposite. Her heart felt like it was beating out of her chest, and her mind felt as though it was the puppet, and the stupid voices were the strings.

S he even surprised herself when she finally spoke up--- her tiny hand barely forming a wave. A small "hi" fell from her lips as the brunette finally began to move her feet. There was no going back now, and there sure as hell was no back-up plan.

N ow she stood in front of him--- feeling immediately intimidated by their height difference. Her eyes were on her white--or at least they used to be--Converse as they moved from side to side. She felt so dumb as she just stood there, not knowing what to say or do. Her mouth opened, as if she was going to finally say something, but nothing would come out. Finally, she felt something coming up and, as said in their favorite movie to watch together, it felt like word vomit.

"R emember when I liked that one foreign exchange student from Italy, ya know, before the stuff with my parents? We had a whole plan on how we would get him to like me--" Her small fingers pushed her brunette locks out of her eyes before a small chuckle left her lips, "But when the day came, I started to cry and got super nervous? Well, this is kind of like that--- except a lot worse." She licked her lips out of nervous habit, noticing most of the students had already gotten to their classrooms

[tfwisabella]

I sabella had never been one to catch feelings, or even think about them, actually. Her life for the past 3 or so years had revolved around meaningless hook-ups. She hadn't been like this for her whole life, but the drama involving her parents, and sometimes even the young girl herself, made her the way she was today. Commitment was one of her worse fears, and even the thought of it made the brunette uneasy. All of this became what seemed like a storm to Isabella, though, ever since the stupid kiss between her and one of her long time friends, Dom. As much as she tried to push the feelings she felt away, they would seem to just overwhelm her mind and body even more. It had seem to become apparent to the other, though, when Isabella began to push him away. Obviously, the girl didn't want to push her friend away like that, but she felt it was her only option. 

S he let out a loud groan as she heard her alarm blare in her ears. As of that moment, she was running on about an hour or so of sleep. "Fuck." Another loud groan left her lips before she sat up slowly, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. Something inside of her was telling her that everything was gonna be okay, while the other told her nothing was gonna work out. Ever. A deep breath filed her small frame as she finally swung her legs over the edge of her bed. Her eyes darted over to her vanity where a photo strip of the pair laid in the position where she had left it last night. A small smile crept onto her features before that small voice in her head told her to forget about it. Her teeth caught her bottom lip before she finally managed to lift herself from her seat on the bed and walk out of her room.

I n no way shape or form was she paying attention to the teacher or anyone around her as she sat in her first period. This was the only class she had with the boy, so she made sure that she didn't let her eyes wander like they usually did, which meant her foot was constantly tapping as she chewed mindlessly on the string of her hoodie. She didn't know what time it was, either, because the clock was right above his head and she feared looking at her phone, so for all she knew she could be stuck in this stupid situation for another 30 minutes. The arguing voices inside of her started up, yet again. "You're being a pussy, Isabella." "Stop worrying about it, it's not like he's into you, anyways." "This is so stupi-" The arguing was cut off by the loud screech of the bell. Her head perked up like a deer in headlights as she grabbed her backpack and ran to the door, only to hear her name being called by the teacher. She clenched her eyes shut and mouthed profanities to herself as she turned around to face her teacher. "You seem a bit off today, Ms.Moreno. Is everything alright?" Isabella managed to plaster a fake smile onto her lips as she replied, "Everything's alright, but look, I gotta go. My next class is all the way on the other side of the building. Bye." She quickly turned on her heel, and rushed out of the class room. Of course, she was lying. Her next class was only a few rooms down, but she still had to haul ass to her locker and she didn't want to be able to leave time for any sort of confrontation with Dom. But her hopeful wishes were crushed as she saw him standing there next to her locker. Right at that moment the boy turned around and their eyes met. To make it even worse, her feet felt like they were glued to the floor and she knew there was no getting out of this one. 

[tfwisabella]

dom → isabooty <3

dom: NO

dom: I MEAN IT

dom: even if u do i wont give up

isabella: listen i really want to believe u nd let u in but something in me wont let me

isabella: i'll sleep on it alright????

[tfwisabella]

dom → isabooty <3

dom: u will always be good enough for me

dom: always and forever :~/

isabella: r u just saying that :/

isabella: i know im gna fuck up somehow

[tfwisabella]

dom → isabooty <3

dom: :~(((

dom: why r u scared ???

dom: isa u know i would never hurt u

isabella: i've seen too many people get hurt too many times

isabella: well yeah i know that

isabella: but im scared im not gonna be good enough

[tfwisabella]

dom → isabooty <3

dom: hey

dom: i can see u doing amazing things

dom: i can see a whole life ahead of u that just radiates greatness

dom: and i want to have the tiniest part in that

isabella: i wish i could see that too

isabella: but i really cant

isabella: and i wish i could let u in but

isabella: i'm just scared

[tfwisabella]

dom → isabooty <3

dom: *shooting star emoji*

dom: WHY

dom: BUT WHAT IF SOMETHING RLLY POSITIVE HAPPENS

isabella: *peace sign emoji*

isabella: WELL THE THING I S

isabella: I CANT SEE MYSELF DOING ANYTHING POSITIVE WITH MY LIFE

[tfwisabella]

dom → isabooty <3

dom: *bomb emoji*

dom: THEN ILL WAIT EVEN LONGER

dom: i just wanna kno what u think :~(

isabella: *dead emoji*

isabella: DNT DO THT

isabella: what if i dnt want u 2 know what i thINK

[tfwisabella]

dom → isabooty <3

dom: *sick emoji*

dom: i will wait ALL OF WINTER

dom: NO ITS NOT ISABOOTY IM NOTHING LIKE SATAN

isabella: *gun emoji*

isabella: THEN I'LL SLEEP LONGER

isabella: WELL KIND OF

[tfwisabella]

dom → isabooty <3

dom: *devil emoji*

dom: ILL WAIT FOR U UNTIL U WAKE UP

dom: I JUST WANT TO //TALK// TO U

dom: ITS NOT LIKE UR TALKING TO THE DARK LORD SATAN

isabella: *scared emoji*

isabella: im gna be asleep ALL OF WITNER

isabella: UM YA IT BASICALLY IS

[tfwisabella]

dom → isabooty <3

dom: *volcano emoji*

dom: SEE

dom: IT WILL ALL WORK OUT !!!

isabella: *angel emoji*

isabella: NO

isabella: IM BUYING EAR PLUGS RN THEN I'M GOING INTO HIBERNATION

isabella: UNDER MY BED

[tfwisabella]

dom → isabooty <3

dom: *crying emoji*

dom: under the bed ???

isabella: *salsa emoji*

isabella: ........shit

isabella: my plan is SOILED

[tfwisabella]

dom → isabooty <3

dom: *frowny side eyes emoji*

dom: ill.... lure u out with beyonce

isabella: *girl with hand out emoji*

isabella: i'll buy ear plugs

[tfwisabella]

dom → isabooty <3

dom: *kissy emoji* *kissy emoji* *kissy emoji* *kissy emoji*

dom: swerve i will drive 2 ur house and make u talk to me

isabella: *emoji with no mouth*

isabella: i'll hide under my bed

[tfwisabella]

dom → isabooty <3

dom: *double heart emoji**double heart emoji**double heart emoji*

dom: but ??? it is ??

dom: it's called //wording//

isabella: *fist emoji* *fist emoji* *fist emoji* *fist emoji*

isabella: my mother is calling me i must go