𝜗ৎ j .ᐟ

20yo. any pronouns!

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⋆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆ jane .ᐟ any pronouns, twenty, writer. c.ai creator (check this post too!) . asks are open for requests for blurbs, fics & of course, chatting!

visit my masterlist .ᐟ

if you are under 18, please filter the tag # thankschef after hours !

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dormmates threatening each other in the groupchat over dishes 😭

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sadly no butttt there is this guy in one of my other classes that lwk might be my next doomed situationship lmao

u saying this reminds me two of my friends (love and adore both of them) started dating/a situationship and its horrible and DOOMED so anon BEWARE !!!!

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saw this reallyyyyyy hot blonde guy at one of my tournaments and wish i got his number😔

forever haunted that i didnt talk to him even after he smiled at me☹️

omg noooo anon is there a chance u see him again???? gotta shoot ur shot when u can!

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copenhagen lowwwkey overrated sorry carm

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im revisiting next week! staying one night because my return flight is so late😭😭

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fuck it i’ll rewatch greys anatomy fine

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also! spencer reid obsession is sooooo strong these days i’m actually losing my mind

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okay promise i’m getting to writing… pinky promise even!!!

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i’m actually liking what i’m writing rn….. yay yay yay idk when i’ll finish but i’m writing two-three dad!carmy ones so i want to publish them together 🙂‍↔️

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have you ever considered quitting making bots because of the impact ai is having on our world? just curious because some other creators have decided that too.

i haven’t made bots in a while, i keep the account up but i’m not using it 🫶 i’ve been turning the bots i made into fics etc. because i like my mind and what i write (sometimes) but rn all i write are fics (& essays lol)

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okay promise i’m getting to writing… pinky promise even!!!

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just letting you know anon i saw ur request i’m on vacation in london rn i’ll start writing again when i’m back lmaooo

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the sun is out finally…. crawling out of depression

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copenhagen lowwwkey overrated sorry carm

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pretty sure the guy i like has a gf/talking with someone.💔

NOOOO omg anon i’m sorry… that sucks but you’ll be okay i believe it !!!

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wedding jitters ♡.ᐟ

summary: it's your wedding day! but what is carmen berzatto if not anxious?

word count: 795

a/n: small tiny and short to break my writer's block. not proofread whatsoever. @dumbbandpoetic asked for this monthhssss ago... i've been neglectful. oh well. i'm posting this during a lecture, so give it some love :]

Sunny spring day, warm but not hot, friends and family gathered and ready. It was perfect.

It was supposed to be anyways, and it had been while Carmen was getting dressed, when Richie actually teared up, when Nat left the room after a glance yelling back, “I’m not crying!” It was perfect when Richie pretended to give him a “dad talk” (as he called it) about how he should treat you right. Carmen was smiling, laughing, excited but not anxious. 

Then it started small. He could slowly feel his breathing get heavier the longer he stared at himself in the mirror. He “cleaned up well” as Richie repeatedly said, and he believed it. He looked nice and put together in his suit, the boutonnière that had a hint of blue (that you insisted he had because you had said, “I can’t survive without it complimenting your eyes.”) sat nicely. He looked like a groom. 

He felt like a groom. He was a groom. 

Without realizing when or how, he had started hyperventilating, pacing around the room, and frantically picking at his nails. Richie had tried everything short of beating the shit out of him (“I’ll do it, cousin, but I know you wouldn’t get any fucking better.”). 

So, despite Carmen protesting a million times, Richie did the only thing that he hadn’t tried yet. 

He brings you in. 

Carmen’s sitting on the couch, bouncing his leg violently when you knock on the door and come in, wedding dress and all— And he breaks.

“No, no,” he covers his eyes, hands still shaking, “Can’t see you—”

He keeps protesting, little mumbles about how this is a bad idea and bad luck, despite knowing that time and time again, when everything else fails, you always calm him down. Then, just as he knew you would, you walk up to him. He hears the footsteps as your heels click against the floor then stop in front of him. He presses his hands more against his eyes, breathing deeply. 

“Baby, seriously, it’s bad luck to see the bride in her wedding dress—” 

“You’re superstitious now?”

Your chuckle comes accompanied by your hands covering his, tugging them off his eyes slowly. Carmen keeps his eyes closed despite your hands holding his, and when he hears you move to sit next to him, his eyes finally open. 

There are tears threatening to spill, but once his eyes are open, he can’t close them. The view in front of him, you in a white dress. Gorgeous, your hair perfectly done and your features soft as you let go of one of his hands to cup his cheek.

“I’m so fucked up,” Carmen’s voice only comes out in a whisper, and he ducks his head to press a kiss to your palm, “I never thought I’d be here, never thought I’d find someone like you.” He takes a pause before closing his eyes and whispering, “I’m so unprepared.”

Your little laugh doesn’t feel demeaning or humiliating, it feels warm and surrounds him. He opens his eyes again, deciding that the superstition had already been ruined, admiring you. 

“Who’s prepared for marriage?”

He laughs, nervous but still one that shows in his eyes, “Is that what we’re focusing on?”

“Well, I can’t argue that you are not fucked up. I’m not with you because you are perfectly stable, and I didn’t choose you thinking that you were. You can be fucked up, I love you.”

Carmen raises his brows with a smile, “You sure that was a compliment?”

“I didn’t mean for it to be. It was supposed to be more comforting than anything.” 

A heavy breath leaves him, he mutters "I love you too," and his expression settles to a calm smile. You take the opportunity and peck the corner of his mouth, then quickly wipe where your lips touched to get rid of the lipstick mark. Carmen swats you hand away gently, an attempt to keep the familiar sensation of your lipstick smudged on his face. You give him a moment with it, his eyes are closed, you can see his breathing return back to normal. 

He opens his eyes when you stand up and walk to the other side of the room, then chuckles when you come back with a napkin to wipe his face. You settle on his right thigh, smoothing your dress out and reaching to wipe the corner of his mouth. His hand goes to hold your waist pretty instantly, and he pulls you closer to him. 

“Thank you,” he mutters, carefully and lightly pecking your cheek. You grin, then get up, holding your hand out to him. 

“Come on, Mr. Berzatto. Let’s get married or whatever.”

He takes your hand with a smile, letting you pull him up, “Let’s get married, Mrs. Berzatto.” 

hope u guys enjoyed reading this! likes and reblogs are eternally appreciated :]

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moving into my dorm…. idk where anything is this is sooooo frustrating

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did my laundry. i am unstoppable

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Would you ever write about luca? 😚😚

tbh i might??? i tried before s4 was out but because he wasn’t in the show much at that point i couldn’t get it down HOWEVERRR i’d have to rewatch to get him right 😭