Digital Veil

The Human Abstract on the "Frak The Gods Tour" w/ Periphery, Textures, and The Contortionist 9/29- 10/4 Daily tour blog written by Zach Pino [email protected]

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Meshuggah KILLIN it

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Oktoberfesting

Well this is certainly a change of pace. Instead of waking up in a moving van this morning, I woke up in my own bed, surrounded by the pattering sound of light rain. With today's slower pace, I’m using today as a general detox from the road. Time to catch up on some sleep, some writing and eat something other than Denny's . Although I’m going to miss touring, it’s nice to be back in LA at The Fortress; our roommate Taso is happy to finally have some company at the apartment, and all that’s missing now is Brett, A.J. and, of course, little Doobie. We anxiously await THA’s return from Europeland.

The guys have since landed in Germany and have their first show tonight. As I shake my right fist at them for having the awesome opportunity to travel Europe, I’ll force myself to live in the past and recount some more tour experiences for you guys. Here’s what happened after our show in Boise.

We drove through Idaho and Utah during a particularly comfortable afternoon. While driving, Dean requested some “Pino tunes” so I popped on an album that felt fitting to our surrounding landscape - Neil Young’s Greatest Hits. Neil whined through “Heart of Gold” and “Southern Man” while we rolled closer Salt Lake City, and as I slowly shifted in and out of light snoozing, the relaxing moments made the beauty of the country pleasantly apparent. One of our finest days of travel I’d say.

The Salt Lake show was solid. The Complex was one of the largest venues we played at, with a stage that elevated significantly above the crowd. As we loaded in, some of us were confused with the number of people who showed up to the venue; frumpy chicks in Halloween-like costumes and messy facepaint, awkwardly goosestepping on flimsy rollerskates. It finally clicked - a roller derby was happening in the room next to ours. Some of us popped in and out of the event, curious to see an actual live roller derby. The dudes in Textures were particularly amused by the event because apparently women don’t often skate around in circles and manhandle each other over in Holland. Interesting day with a satisfying show, we then moved on to Denver...

...where the real fun began.

We arrived to the venue alongside Periphery somewhere in the 10 o’clock hour. To our delight, an Oktoberfest celebration was happening right outside of the venue. With our load in time several hours away, we concluded that the only appropriate thing to do was (of course) drink.

Henry "The Orca" Selva supported the festivities by sporting a green Oktoberfest hat, and good times ensued chilling with the Periphery guys - Misha Mansoor, Spencer Sotelo, tour manager Alex Markides, and all-around badass guitarist, Mark Holcomb.

Other highlights of the afternoon included a deep consideration of a Periphery/Human Abstract “beer olympics” and Henry’s domination over an intense turkey leg.

Each band ended up killing at The Marquis Theater that night and overall, we had an amazing time in Denver.

The following day, we had one of our longest drives - Denver to St. Louis. That particular day was the day that the Metallica and Lou Reed song, “The View,” was released, which kept us grossly entertained; we couldn’t help but mock the absurdity and general crappiness of the song - "I AM THE TABLE!!" The flatness of Kansas kept rolling on, but our sanity was kept intact by watching little Brazilian kids kill each other in "City of God" and catching a stunning sunset.

Night rolled in and we kept on driving, eventually waking up in St. Louis. And that's all for today. Next post: St. Louis BBQ and church metal in Columbus. Good day.

-ZP

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Sickness and Chicken

I'm back! Sorry for neglecting the tour blog over the past week; the hectic shows and abundance of night drives made it difficult to routinely write in some quality bloggage. The plan now is to recap the second half of the tour. After all, too much shit went down to have it all go undocumented.

So right now, I'm sitting in the Logan International Airport in Boston, waiting to fly back to LA. For me, touring times have sadly come to an end. Last night, we finished our last show on the "Frak the Gods Tour" in Montreal The guys in The Human Abstract are a few terminals away from me right now, waiting to board their plane for Germany. Tomorrow, they start the “Never Say Die Tour,” each band member excited to play for European crowds. Unfortunately, there is no room for crew on the tour, so my ass heads home.

For some reason, ever since we left Los Angeles for the second half of the tour, time decided to speed up, leaving us in a blur of consistently spectacular shows. And although we drove intense distances each day, time still seemed to fly by.

So let's rewind a little bit in time and join me as I take you through multiple regions of the United States. And although I'm feeling quite bummed sitting in this terminal, I'll reflect on the end of tour once everything else has been covered.

NORTHWEST

Oakland ended up being a decent show - the small venue hosted an ecstatic and large audience and every band delivered a powerful performance.

When each show goes very well and the venues start to look alike, the flavor and experience of each city stems from what you discover or encounter outside of the venue.

In Oakland's case, a highlight of that day was our encounter with the Chicken Lady.

While searching for a suitable place to eat in downtown Oakland, a young black woman approached, Brett, A.J., and myself. “Can I have some money?” she asked, a pretty typical request. Having been hit up for money in almost every city we had been to at that point, we were less inclined to be polite.

“No,” A.J. curtly responded.

“Why not?”

“...because I don’t want to.”

She left, we moved on, and noting the lack of decent eateries, we resorted on the dreadful Panda Express. Food that had obviously been sitting out all afternoon was plopped in our white to-go boxes. Delicious. We ate outside. The same lady approached us at our table.

“Can I have some of your chicken?”

“What? Are you kidding? No.”

She stares at Brett, then leaves.

Comes back.

“Come on, gimme some of yo chicken.”

“The fuck! NO! Get out of here!”

"Why can't I have some of your chicken?"

"Listen, am I going to have to get a security guard to kick you out of here?"

More back and forth, more empty argument, I believe the topic of crack came up...she finally left us alone and stared at us from another table.

Chicken Lady. The characters you encounter...

Then sickness hit.

Dean was out of commission for a day or so, and I was obnoxiously congested for several days. Being sick on tour is rather unpleasant and every daily annoyance is amplified when you're underslept and feeling like crap. Here's what running merch looks like in Seattle with only 4 hours of sleep and dense snotty buildup in your skull:

But poor A.J. suffered the most and was seconds away from Death's door. Nah, not quite that extreme, but he did end up with strep throat. To further prove the theory that pure metal swims through A.J.'s veins instead of human blood, A.J. opted for a direct shot of antibiotics into his leg.

Heh heh...cool. 

So that was essentially our experience in the Northwest - sickness, long drives, strange encounters and great shows. After making sure we all got more rest, everyone's health increased as we moved East. Next post will outline when the real fun began during our times in Salt Lake City, Denver and St. Louis. Stay tuned.

-ZP

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Wherever We May Roam

Greetings once again from road. As you stare at your computer screen through the digital veil, we’re back on the California freeway system on our way up the West Coast. Morale and motivation is high, as we spent the past four days around our home base in Los Angeles.

By having three shows in the LA/San Diego area, we were able to rejuvenate by staying at “The Fortress,” our apartment near the University of Southern California. Sleeping in our own beds and munching at our usual eateries - Karma Cafe, Pete's Burgers and the majestic Taco Truck - was definitely a welcomed and comforting experience after two weeks far from home. We got to see some great friends, including our roommate and classical guitar maestro, Taso Comanescu, and of course, our little buddy Doobie. With a stomach full of al pastor burritos, I’d like to share a few highlights from our weekend.

Our first show at The Chain Reaction in Anaheim was a crammed success; the emphatic crowd gave off a wild energy that made the venue seem much larger than it actually was. The band’s performance was spot on, although A.J. had some trouble with a security guard during the middle of “Patterns.” I missed most of this because my eyes were fixed on the lighting board, but apparently a security guard, who wasn’t wearing any credentials that distinguished himself as one, somehow got into A.J.’s way during the solo and screwed it up. Once A.J. got a free hand, he shoved the guy to get off stage. The dude got unjustifiably pissed and continued to interfere, which required Mr. Ashton Persimmons to intervene. This squabble apparently continued into the parking lot after the show, requiring Ashton to hold A.J. back as he promised the unprofessional security guard the beating of a lifetime. Pretty badass if you ask me.

One of the finest shows of the tour was at The Key Club in West Hollywood. There was a great vibe to the night which was shared by friends and family in the area. To everyone we know who came out, thank you all so much for making that night stand out. 

And if the crazy hometown show wasn’t cool enough (guitar geeks will find this incredible), after the set, we discovered that a particular guest was in attendance at the show. This guest came with the great classical guitarist Bill Kanengiser, who is A.J.’s guitar teacher at USC - it was none other than Chris Broderick of Megadeth. Needless to say, Taso, A.J., and I bowed to his deistic might and offered Doobie as a sacrifice. 

Before I say goodbye for now, we have a little game we’d all like you to get in on. If you’re familiar with the “Icing” phenomenon, you may enjoy the latest Human Abstract craze - “Midheavening.”

The development of this concept started when we returned to The Fortress; a bunch of us found two paper grocery bags overflowing with The Human Abstract’s sophomore release, “Midheaven,” sitting by Taso’s bedroom door. At first, we figured it would be funny to simply dump the bags’ contents in the middle of Taso’s floor, but we soon realized that taking each CD and cleverly hiding them in random areas of his room would be much better. Starting with pillow cases, drawers and other inconspicuous areas in his room, we soon spread the mission to the living room and kitchen, more overtly placing the CDs in toaster slots, microwave, refrigerator and the like. Taso came home later and found himself uncovering a new Midheaven ever few minutes. BAM, just got "Midheavened."

We went even further, eventually Midheavening Dean's suitcase and Brett's bed. Midheavening is an epidemic that cannot be contained. And like the bro-tastic “Icing” game, (if one is to discover the Smirnoff Ice, they must chug the entire bottle) getting Midheavened requires one to stop whatever they are doing and listen to the album from start to finish. Annoying? Yes, but the hilarity is worth it.

So try Midheavening your friends. Send us pictures if you do. That's it for now. Show in Oakland, CA tonight, followed by Portland, OR on Wednesday. Good day.

-ZP

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Open Your Miiiiind

Damn, Southwestern states are huge - long ass drives. We’ve had an incredible time in Texas over the past several days and we’re currently in Albuquerque, New Mexico. Let me bring you eager inquisitive minds up to date. On our day off, we made the 13 hour drive from San Antonio to Albuquerque. Finding the desolate West Texan landscape similar to Mars, we fittingly decided to watch Total Recall in the van. Ya and Fargo came later as we passed through Roswell, New Mexico, yer darn tootin’.

We’re starting to fall into the rhythm of things now. The repetition of show days ends up being a good thing; you’re able to better anticipate down time, load ins and outs are more streamlined, as is merch organization. You also recognize when to take immediate advantage of certain surroundings, jumping at the infrequent opportunity to run a load of laundry or (in my case) get some substantial writing done.

Albuquerque is a strange, yet unique small city. The venue, The Launchpad, is your typical small, dirty and average club. The show itself went over pretty well, nothing spectacular but nothing to sneeze at. The more interesting part of the day came earlier; A.J., Henry and I enjoyed a long walk around downtown, scarfing down an intense breakfast and bingeing coffee at the Fast Star Cafe on a beautiful mid-morning with the right temperature. So nice.

Fast forward a couple hours later after load in. A.J. and I ventured out on the streets in search of more coffee and food. Dark clouds had since obscured the sunny day and seemed to bring out the dregs of the city; tough guys standing in packs of 10, a toothless tweaker, and a homeless dude on hard drugs harassing each passerby. Even more strangely, A.J. and I crossed paths with a middle aged man carrying a freakishly large lizard. Apparently the reptile was a cousin of the komoto dragon and was covertly snuck into this country via airplane under the shirt of his owner. Quite the odd experience in Albuquerque.

So now we’re on our way to Arizona for two shows in Scottsdale and Tucson. Afterward, we’re heading back home to Southern California for shows in Anaheim, San Diego and Hollywood.

Lastly, as some of you may not know, A.J. is actually quite the impressionist. Not a painter, rather a voice mimicker. Among his recent impressions include Dave Grohl (the BEST! the BEST! the BEST!), Stone Cold Steve Austin in uncharacteristic situations (book clubs, cooking shows) and the “Gay T-1000” from Terminator 2 (Helllloooo, have y’all seen this boy John Connor?) A.J.’s impressions are keeping us entertained on the long drives through the Southwest. Check back soon for more updates. And tip your merch guy.

-ZP

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Can I Get A Hell Yea? - Austin 3:16

Ladies and gentlemen, today I have something special for you all - something to cherish until your final days. Below is an impromptu interview with bassist Henry Selva and singer Ryan Devlin, taken after a few Coors Lights took control of our pleasure sensors in our cerebral cortexes. During Periphery's set at the House of Rock, I abandoned my merch duties and snagged Henry and Ryan for a candid chat. Please excuse the nonsense and general absurdity. Enjoy.

Zach Pino: So, I’m here right now with bassist Henry Augusto Selva of The Human Abstract and newcomer, Ryan Devlin.

Ryan Devlin: I’m a rookie!

ZP: He is a rookie. So guys, how’s the tour been going for the past week or two?

Henry Selva: Your voice cracked right there.

ZP: Ah, it cracked. I’m going through puberty right now.

RD: Me too!

ZP: It’s a weird thing...

HS: It’s all good. Tour is going very well. Very, very well actually. We’re on the seventh date of this “Frak The Gods Tour” with Periphery, Textures and The Contortionist. And Mr. Devlin here has been doing a wonderful, wonderful job. And we’re here in Corpus Christi, Texas.

RD: Textures and The Contortionist are doing amazing and I’m so glad to be on tour with them.

ZP: Absolutely. Every band on this package is performing very well. It’s a great package. Every band has a different style in a way, but the music is very rhythmic, very metal. It’s all good.

HS: Yeah, we’re all having a great time and tomorrow we hit San Antonio, Texas. So yeah, we’re on our, what, second week of tour? So yeah, it’s just gonna to get better.

ZP: So Ryan, I wanted to ask you: this is your first tour, what are your thoughts so far about the touring life?

RD: It’s fucking crazy. It’s crazy sleeping on the floor of a van every night, but I’m getting used to it. It’s all right. It’s going great.

ZP: You’re not complaining.

RD: I don’t. I don’t complain.

ZP: There’s no room for complainers.

RD: There’s not, you know. It’s going so well that I don’t have any need to complain.

HS: For you kids out there who want to be touring musicians, you can’t complain. You just gotta fuckin’, you know, eat shit and just do it.

RD: You heard it from us kids: eat shit.

ZP: What would you say your least favorite part of touring is?

RD: Finding somewhere good to eat.

ZP: That’s true, our options are limited. We’ve had Waffle House. We’ve had Chik-Fil-A....

HS: Not sleeping properly and small stages. And not having air conditioning.

ZP: Especially when we’re in the Southwest states...

RD: There’s nothing I hate more than waking up sweating.

HS: Waking up DEADDDDD!

ZP: So, how has merch been?

RD: HA, our merch guy sucks!

HS: Oh, we have this fucking rookie of a fucking douche controlling our shit. You know he leaves the merch table every five minutes...

ZP: I tend to do that. It’s so boring.

HS: We haven’t sold shit; we have boxes and boxes overloading our trailer. No, but merch is doing well. Fortunately these kids love our designs and love us so our sales are going well.

RD: We got some great designs, I have to say.

ZP: Von Krampus.

HS: Pinography is taking care of everything.

RD: They’re all super deep and no one really understands them. But it’s all right, they look cool.

ZP: There are layers in those t-shirts. I try to explain it to the fans and they just don’t get it. I’m like, yo, that’s Fyodor Dostoevski on the shirt; it’s lifted from a great work of literature.

RD: You don’t know Russian literature?! WHAT?

ZP: COME ON!

HS: ...those hot dogs are looking pretty good.

ZP: Wanna get some hot dogs?

RD: I think we’re gonna get some hot dogs.

ZP: Let’s get some hot dogs. So on that note, we’re gonna part ways and I’ll transcribe this later and see how this works ‘cause we’re all a couple of beers in.

HS: Plus we’re probably gonna have a couple of more beers after this interview. Tomorrow morning’s headache might not be nice...

ZP: But we have a hotel, this is our one night of not traveling and it’s Friday and we’re gonna get drunk.

RD: WOO!

----

So then we got some chili cheese dogs from “The Dogfather,” a man who is deeply proud of his hotdogs.

To everyone who came out to our shows in Houston, Dallas and Corpus Christi, thanks for the love. You were awesome, and we had an amazing time hanging with you all. Get ready for San Antonio tonight, where A.J. Minette may or may not be doing an on-stage Stone Cold Steve Austin impression.

-ZP 

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"Shrooms Is Better Than Weed"

It’s been a few days since I’ve been able to give you guys an update. Originally, I wanted to write this blog daily, but I soon found out that not only is that hard to do on little sleep, but as the wise Dean Hererra pointed out to me last night, you start to see redundancies on the road. Despite some quirky events that happen throughout the days and running inside jokes, the daily repetition is somewhat true; we have the drive, the load in, the merch set up, warming up, doors, the show, stage and merch strike, and loadout. Those essential elements make up the days, so instead of exaggerating the excitement-factor of each show, I’ll point out the high and low points over the past few days.

St. Petersburg, Florida was definitely a high point on tour. The venue - The State Theatre - had an enormous stage and the show was an overall success. For those of you who were there, you may have noticed that A.J. wasn’t his usual animated self on stage, standing in one position for the majority of the set. After the show, he revealed to me that during the beginning of “Vela,” as he bent down and ripped out the ass of his pants. "I felt like a teenage girl on her period caught without a tampon," said A.J., "so I crossed my legs for the rest of the show."

Our day in Atlanta day was wet. The late night to early morning driving shifts started to become problematic. Luckily, I was able to squeeze in a few hours of sleep before my shift from St. Petersburg to Atlanta, followed by sporadic snoozing afterward. We stopped to pick up our sound guy, Ashton Parsons, from the airport. Ashton had previously been running sound for the band Anchored, on tour with Volbeat and Cold. Now he's on board to make The Human Abstract sound even better on stage. He also has magical powers.

Now with an even fuller van, we headed to our Atlanta venue, The Masquerade. Divided into 3 stages - “Heaven,” “Hell,” and “Purgatory” - our tour package shared the venue with two other acts for the night, Hawthorne Heights and Hank III. I suppose that because progressive metal and djent aren’t as popular as pop-emo and acid country, management figured they'd shuffle the “Frak the Gods” bands to the side on the Purgatory stage. Ironically, this stage complemented the overall mood of the day. A mix of humidity, pouring rain and a stage better suited for a local bar band made the daytime bland and uninspiring.

Hours passed and the usual suspects arrived as the doors opened. Sell a t-shirt or two, chat with a few band fanatics, watch people get drunk - all common occurrences during the early hours of a metal show.

But after all the waiting, all the annoyances, realizing that you haven’t showered in several days, it’s time for the show. Incredible music is played and the fans headbang, cheer and sing along to every song. Despite the small room and the sketchy lighting rig that was on the actual stage for some reason, THA gave a solid performance to an enthusiastic audience. Bassist Henry Selva actually got some crowd action by running to to the back of the room, saying "what's up" to Ashton at the sound board, moshing with some fans, and returning back to the stage.

After the show is pure sweat. Eardrums keep ringing and you’re unable to hear certain frequencies. Cheers and handshakes for a job well done. Everything is good and everyone is happily exhausted - it’s rock and roll. Down a few beers and relax after a long day’s work, just like one would do for any other profession.

A.J., Henry, Ryan and I eventually went upstairs to watch a bit of Hank III’s set...aaaand we got to hang with these guys:

So that was Atlanta, hot, wet and fun at the end of the day. It’s easy to get pissy when you have no reasonable place to shit and morale gets low, but getting to be in a new city every day, meeting interesting people and working with chill bands and crews that all happen to love music- prettayy, prettayy, prettay good.

And then there’s Waffle House, which at this point is basically an extension of our van. At this particular Waffle House in Atlanta, we got to talking with our waiter, who had a particular affinity for marijuana, having watched several marijuana "documentaries" on his streaming Netflix. He also claimed that "shrooms is better than weed," and wishes to one day move to California so he can grow and smoke legal bud. Nice guy. 

We’re now in Houston, Texas, chilling in our La Quinta hotel room. No joke, the first thing that popped on the TV was Larry the Cable Guy. Welcome to Texas, I guess. Tomorrow’s show is at Warehouse Live in Houston. Come out, get crazy, and hang out at the merch table - I'll give you guitar picks. There's still a lot of merch left, but we’re running low on “Pull Me From The Gallows” booty shorts.

-ZP

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Greenestreet

Our second show of the tour in Greensboro, North Carolina was another success! Thanks to everyone who came out. Greensboro was a cool town; got some Jimmy John's, coffee times, committed a few felonies, you know, business as usual. 

After the show, we headed south toward Florida for our show in St. Petersburg. Day after day of off-schedule sleeping patterns and nocturnal driving shifts are starting to take a toll, but the ever-jovial Henry is keeping moral up with Dream Theater, Megadeth and Lamb of God blasting in the van.

Early this morning, we experienced our first encounter with law enforcement by having the audacity to drive 60mph in a 45mph zone of highway. Apparently Brett's charm wasn't enough to deter Earl the portly cop from administering a speeding ticket. Perhaps our van's graffiti didn't help matters much. Oh, well.

I'll keep you updated on the show in St. Petersburg. One hour until doors open.

-ZP

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Success in Baltimore

Creeping toward 4am and I'm up in the passenger seat next to Brett, jamming out to some "Radio Ga Ga" by Queen. Although I'm beyond beat, I'm dedicated to updating this blog everyday for you guys, so here's a rundown of the eventful first show on the "Frak The Gods Tour."

Today began with a decent lunch at a bar and grill across the street from our hotel. Buffy, our server, made sure we were fed, although we couldn't help but hear the restaurant's background music and comment on the tonal redundancies/overall cheesiness of Kenny G's music as we ate.

After a short drive to the venue, The Ottobar, we arrived early to avoid the supposed heavy traffic caused by the Baltimore Grand Prix. The afternoon was relaxing, complete with a few games of catch and a walk through Johns Hopkin's campus. Eventually, each band began to show up and we got to work loading in gear and merch. Fast forward through hours of merch selling, mingling, warming up and local bands, the time finally came for The Human Abstract to take the stage.

To say that they put on a great show would be a gross understatement. Beginning with “Horizon to Zenith” off of Digital Veil, new vocalist, Ryan Devlin - on his very first show with THA mind you - immediately pleased the crowd and demonstrated how he can, in fact, sing his ass off. While the crowd stood in enjoyment for the set’s first song, it ignited into a moshing frenzy during “Faust,” singing and screaming along with the words. The set continued with “Vela...Together We Await the Storm” and “Elegiac/Complex Terms,” which kept the energetic momentum in full swing. The band played a spot on rendition of “Pattens” next, followed by a shredtastic medley of Nocturne’s finest riffs and solos.

“Digital Veil” concluded the set, and the crowd went absolutely nuts. Crowd surfing occurred with audience members, as well as A.J., who leaped from the venue’s balcony into the arms of adoring fans. That, my friends, is how a metal show should be: a supremely talented band playing with ferocity and vigor to a passionate audience. Tour is off to a great start!

This whole time, I was next to the soundboard running the lights to the show. It was my first time running lights, and I must say, it was a blast rocking out the show and timing the lights with the music. I’m adding “light dude” to my list of tour duties. It was also a pleasure talking with THA fans at the merch table. The band attracts some quality fans, that's for sure.

Tired but elated, we parted ways with the venue and ended up at a Denny’s. Apparently, the Baconalia doesn’t exist anymore. In it’s place is an all-things-cheese menu that features cheese in every food dish. Everything cheese over everything bacon? C’mon, bacon on everything is guaranteed to win every time.

Ok, I’m in dire need of sleep. We’re on our way to Greensboro. North Carolina, for our show at Greenestreet tomorrow. Come out for a fantastic show! Goodnight.

-ZP

[thaontour]

Fat Bottomed Girls

Day 4. Slower pace for today. After waking up at the crack of noon for our first non-travel day, we grabbed a quick Dunkin' Donuts breakfast and headed out for some miscellaneous music equipment errands. Having been years since I’ve been on the East Coast, I was reminded of how much I-95 can suck when it comes to traffic. Eventually, we made our way to our rented rehearsal space to get some practice hours in before the show tomorrow. Creepily, the rehearsal space was in the Baltimore ghetto, but we felt right at home.

Rehearsal went very well, and the guys are sounding like they haven’t missed a day of practice in the past several months. Fortunately, new vocalist, Ryan Devlin, is killing. This guy can really sing.

A lot of business today. Too much business in fact. We eventually were able to find a decent bar for some Yuenglings, and then got in a HEATED debate over In-N-Out vs. Five Guys. A.J. staunchly supports In-N-Out, while Brett will back up Five Guys until the end of his days. What do you guys think?

Show tomorrow at the Ottobar. We are all beyond stoked to play for you guys. Come hang out and rock out to some Digital Veil!

-ZP

[thaontour]

Cici’s Serves Children’s Food

Hey guys. We’re currently a few hours away from Baltimore! We’re looking forward to crashing at a hotel tonight for some much needed rest. Today’s post is short because nothing really happened other than driving and eating.

Since we’ve been encapsulated in our white van, music has been playing pretty much nonstop. We take turns with driving shifts (150 miles) and whoever is at the wheel gets to control the radio. To give you an idea of the diverse selection of our musical tastes, here’s a small breakdown of what we’ve been playing:

Dean: Korn, Amon Amarth, Bjork, Mew, Garth Brooks

Brett: Queen, Protest the Hero, W.A. Mozart, Frederic Chopin

A.J.: Beirut, Paul Galbraith, Charles Castronovo, Edith Piaf, Nat King Cole, Rachmaninoff, Radiolab podcast

Henry: Megadeth, Dream Theater, Trivium, As I Lay Dying

Me: Radiohead, The Beatles, Pink Floyd, Ours, Elliott Smith, Vladimir Horowitz, Frank Sinatra, Neil Young

Other than that, we watched Amistad this afternoon (Anthony Hopkins absolutely owns that film) and ate at a CiCi’s in Maryland, which we determined only serves food that little kids crave.

Rehearsal tomorrow and our first show at The Ottobar in Baltimore on Friday. Who's coming out?

-ZP

[thaontour]

Push It To The Limit

The overnight drive was a success and we’re now passing through Oklahoma. A.J. and I took the night shift through New Mexico, catching the sunrise as we listened to a piano solo performance on the radio - a calming and optimistic moment that suggested that a great tour is upon us.

We eventually stopped in Amarillo, Texas for some BBQ. I’ve never been to Texas before, but entering the small BBQ joint affirmed pretty much every stereotype I imagined about Texas - Lonestar decor, customers in cowboy boots, pop-country music playing on the radio. But the food was great and we left will bellies full of brisket, soon to enter the stupidly hot state of Oklahoma.

So Tour Mission 1 didn’t work out very well. Knowing that we should cover up our trailer’s graffiti, we found a Walmart Supercenter last night and bought the cheapest cans of white spray paint we could find. We figured that spraying over the graffiti with white paint would cancel out the eyesore, but apparently you get what you pay for, and our cover up attempts merely dulled the effect. And it was pretty funny because it looked like we were the ones spraying graffiti on our trailer in the middle of a Walmart parking lot at 9:30 at night.

We also ended up buying a set of cheap speakers so we could enjoy the luxury of "surround sound" in the van. Remember how on MTV Cribs, nearly every rapper showed off his decked-out entertainment systems that looped Scarface 24/7? Well that’s what’s happening in our van now - watching Scarface on our ghetto-rigged entertainment center. We're also getting some reading done because our cheap speakers don't get very loud, necessitating subtitles.

That's all for now. Hopefully we’ll make more progress tonight and arrive in Baltimore tomorrow night. We'll keep you all posted. Until then, watch Scarface. It reeks of ‘80’s.

-ZP

[thaontour]

Driving Times

And we’re off for The Human Abstract's 24th tour! We’re currently on Interstate 40 heading toward our first show in Baltimore. The heat of the desert is overwhelming the engine and keeping our clothing in a constant state of dampness. But despite the steamy van temperature, we’ve been able to entertain ourselves through acoustic Beatles jam sessions, blasting Korn, and observing Dean’s enraged reactions to AM political talk radio.

Last night we picked up our trailer, which had been stored in the seedy underbelly of Downtown Los Angeles. Unfortunately, we found the once-clean trailer covered in crude graffiti. Now we're on Tour Mission 1: find some way to get the graffiti off the trailer or cover it with paint. Other than that, everything is running smoothly and we're now in Arizona.

Although we’re all excited to get the tour started, we’re facing some separation anxiety. One member of the team wasn’t fortunate enough to embark on tour with us: Doobie, Brett’s half-Dachshund, half-Doberman Pincher pup.

We considered taking him on the road with us because he’s always pleasant and affectionate company. He’s also an absolute chick magnet. But we ultimately decided that caring for a dog on the road could be too much trouble so we said our goodbyes last night and gave him an al pastor taco from our local taco truck. He freaked out.

So as the tour begins, we’re presented with an array of questions:

Will Dean cut his dreads?

How will newcomer Ryan Devlin perform on his first tour?

Will this be THA’s last tour?

Will AJ continue to tuck in his shirts on the road?

Stay tuned.

ETA to Baltimore: 60 hrs

-ZP

[thaontour]

Welcome To The Machine

What's going on THA fans?

I am Zach Pino - Pinography to some - and I will be guiding you through the day-to-day occurrences of The Human Abstract's September tour with Periphery, Textures, and The Contortionist. Keep checking this page daily for show reviews, travel fiascos, nefarious acts, charitable acts, and "Classical Corner" with A.J.

I'm hopping on tour as their roadie/merch dude/guitar tech/stage manager/writer and I'm definitely psyched to be on board.

We'll be leaving Los Angeles on Monday en route to Baltimore for the first show. Until then, get excited. 

Be sure to follow us on Facebook, Twitter and the like...

Cast of characters:

The Band: @humanabstract

The Tenor: @ryanseandevlin

The Maestro: @ajminette

The Orca: @henryaselva

The Doobie: @brettpoweLLL

The Dread: @deanmhererra

The Bard: @zachpino

The Soundboard: @ashtonpar1 

[thaontour]