Enter freely and of your own will...

Ask and ye shall recieve!  Ask me anything at all.  A place where you can ask Count Dracula anything about vampires, folklore, and Gothic Horror. (Note: This blog is maintained by the literary incarnation of Dracula so expect occasional hostility).

[travelingtsince1843]

Usually I would condemn someone of predatory inclination being so blatant but you have managed to amuse me. Just refrain from entering my castle again this century.

Normally, that would be enough to have me dropping by asap but...I’ve never been one to mess with a man who practices extreme forestry and thinks that fatally poking people with large bits of metal should be an Olympic sport. So, I’ll just wait until Jan 1st of 2100, TROLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!

[thatguywiththecape]

That was not an invitation.   And this is not a threat.

(See image below.)

It is a promise of things yet to be.  Enjoy the remainder of the century.  

[travelingtsince1843]

Cool! I’m so glad you aren’t threatening me and that you invited me over next century! We’re gonna be the best of friends XD!

[thatguywiththecape]

Fie ca următoarea capră pe care încercați să o mâncați să se dovedească a fi un faun excitat cu puterea de a provoca o șchiopătare persistentă. 

[travelingtsince1843]

Thanks for the thought my dude! We’ll be sure to use protection!

[thatguywiththecape]

That poor Satyr...

[travelingtsince1843]

Usually I would condemn someone of predatory inclination being so blatant but you have managed to amuse me. Just refrain from entering my castle again this century.

Normally, that would be enough to have me dropping by asap but...I’ve never been one to mess with a man who practices extreme forestry and thinks that fatally poking people with large bits of metal should be an Olympic sport. So, I’ll just wait until Jan 1st of 2100, TROLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!

[thatguywiththecape]

That was not an invitation.   And this is not a threat.

(See image below.)

It is a promise of things yet to be.  Enjoy the remainder of the century.  

[travelingtsince1843]

Cool! I’m so glad you aren’t threatening me and that you invited me over next century! We’re gonna be the best of friends XD!

[thatguywiththecape]

Fie ca următoarea capră pe care încercați să o mâncați să se dovedească a fi un faun excitat cu puterea de a provoca o șchiopătare persistentă. 

[travelingtsince1843]

Usually I would condemn someone of predatory inclination being so blatant but you have managed to amuse me. Just refrain from entering my castle again this century.

Normally, that would be enough to have me dropping by asap but...I’ve never been one to mess with a man who practices extreme forestry and thinks that fatally poking people with large bits of metal should be an Olympic sport. So, I’ll just wait until Jan 1st of 2100, TROLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!

[thatguywiththecape]

That was not an invitation.   And this is not a threat.

(See image below.)

It is a promise of things yet to be.  Enjoy the remainder of the century.  

[thatguywiththecape]

"I've heard varying theories about whether or not vampires simply absorb their meals or need to expel waste as they did with their formerly mortal bodies. Are you willing to explain the truth?" ~Fate-Is-Woven-And-Cut (Jubilant)

All components of the blood are usually burned in the process of absorption.  Erythrocytes (Red blood cells) for nutrients and oxygen, leukocytes (white blood) cells stimulate healing and are altered into our own cellular structures to prevent the invasion of bacteria or viruses, platelets for coagulation when wounded, and plasma for hydration. 

The metamorphosis into one of the Nosferatu alters the metabolism in such a way as to make of us very efficient in matters of digestion.  Nothing goes to waste, figuratively and literally speaking.  

The lack of waste production is also why human food is indigestible for most vampires.  As that aspect of the digestive tract isn’t really in use anymore, the only way to expel the unnecessarily substance is regurgitation. This is why that poor child vampire reacted so terribly to the sweet in the novel Let the Right One In.  It is not pleasant, nor is it pretty.   The famed Stoker line “I never drink wine” and “I do not sup” has a practicality in its origin.   

[thatguywiththecape]

Is this account still active?

When I choose to remember The Internet exists, yes.

[thatguywiththecape]

The REAL story of “I am Legend”

This video is The Last Man on Earth starring Vincent Price.  This is the only faithful film adaptation of Richard Matheson’s I am legend.

 Most people don’t know it but “I am legend” was not about zombies or mutants.   The Creatures were old school, traditional vampires.  Warded by symbols of faith and garlic.  And killed via stake through the heart.   The hero learns (at the end) that he had been killing the intelligent race that had replaced humans.  Killing them when they are most vulnerable (in their daytime sleep).  He had become their boogie man. 

That’s where the line “I am legend” comes from, the moment he realized he was the monster in a world of vampires… 

The twist, the meaning, these things have been so distorted that no one would recognize a faithful adaptation of “I am Legend” today, they’d think it’s a stupid vampire knock off version or something to that effect.  I wish someone was brave enough to try a faithful version again…

Black and white

And colorized option.

[dontmeantobepoliticalbut]

I hope this offends you. 🖕🏻

[thatguywiththecape]

I approve.

[thenightling]

The 26th of May is Peter Cushing's Birthday. The 27th is Christopher Lee and Vincent Price's Birthdays. It's the trifecta of Gothic Horror Icons whose birthdays are only hours apart from each other. Not the same year.

Further note:   Peter Cushing and Vincent Price were the basis for Peter Vincent in the original Fright Night, Fright Night Part 2, and Fright Night tie-in comics.

[thenightling]

Happy World Dracula Day!

On this day in 1897 the novel Dracula was first published.   It is also the birthday of Peter Cushing (who played Van Helsing in all the Hammer horror films).  And tomorrow is the Birthday of Christopher Lee (Who played Dracula in the Hammer Dracula films and many others.)  And tomorrow is also the Birthday of Vincent Price (also a great and classic horror actor.)

[the-memedaddy]

meirl

[thatguywiththecape]

We have a few major celebrations today.

1. Happy Birthday to the late Peter Cushing- who played Doctor Van Helsing more than any other actor in film. (Born May 26th)

2. Happy Birthday to Christopher Lee and Vincent Price, both of whom were born tomorrow (May 27th).

3. Happy World Dracula Day!

[cause-boys-dont-cry-deactivated]

why the FUCK is there a big spider on my bedroom wall it doesn't look like any spider i've ever seen in my entire life what the fuck

[2-point-5]

are you sure it's a spider?

[cause-boys-dont-cry-deactivated]

yes i am it looks like this

[2-point-5]

oh that's a wolf spider. they taste like celery and pork and they aren't poisonous.

[cause-boys-dont-cry-deactivated]

why is it in my room

[cause-boys-dont-cry-deactivated]

and why do you know what it tastes like

[cause-boys-dont-cry-deactivated]

@sicklythiasus why do you know what a wolf spider tastes like

[2-point-5]

nom nom.

[cause-boys-dont-cry-deactivated]

what

[2-point-5]

yummy yummy in my tummy tummy

[cause-boys-dont-cry-deactivated]

when and why did you eat a wolf spider

[2-point-5]

band camp, 2019. there was an infestation. i started eating them to get rid of them. i have since eaten cockroaches, crickets, grasshoppers, and those little green grass spiders.

the greenies taste like vegetarian sausage.

[cause-boys-dont-cry-deactivated]

why was your solution to eat them

[2-point-5]

i mean, no one else was gonna.

[celtic-pyro-deactivated20230725]

[thatguywiththecape]

@sicklythiasus​ You’re had your fun.  It’s time to come home, Renfield.

[neil-gaiman]

Why'd they change Crowley's hair color for the TV adaptation? It seems like an odd thing to change, especially because David Tennant's hair is naturally pretty close to the same color as book!Crowley's.

Book Crowley’s hair is “dark”. That’s the only description. TV Crowley’s hair is definitely dark. (It’s not dark brown or black, it’s a dark red.) Aziraphale is the one with the light coloured hair.

[meltingpenguins]

You know how many hundreds of people have to deal with racist twats telling them Aziraphale MUST BE WHITE AND BLOND…

Way to give them the finger and give the racists ammunition.

[likorys-shimenawa]

So you’re saying only white people can have light colored hair… Who’s racist again?

Cause how dare a book author give angel and demon a dark/light hair-contrast.

[thegate-thekey]

Did you ever even consider where that contrast comes from? Because light = good and dark = bad have some seriously old racist origins and baggage. We need to maybe stop that.

Yeah I know Crowley’s not bad in the story, the point is we need to stop equating dark charactersitics with evil and light characterstics with good. A lot of people will argue casting and harass actors of color for being cast in a role the people envision as white because the people are racist. An author has a choice in that situation to either say “no, stop, that’s ridiculous, who cares what skin or hair color this character has, that’s not the point” or do what Neil did and completely misread the room.

Neil sucks at handling sensitive topics, be it race or for example trans issues, so maybe he shouldn’t.

I just wish white cishet men stopped writing, like forever. They’ve had their chance, they keep fucking it up. Neil’s not above criticism because his writing is better than some of the other shit on places like r/menwritingwomen etc.

“Oh but he had that inspirational quote about creativity!” who cares, authors of color and/or queer authors have a lot of inspirational quotes as well, we don’t need to die on this hill just to defend some rich white dude.

[thatguywiththecape]

You want a man to be suppressed from writing because of his race... Neil Gaiman is Jewish.  He's already a member of a repressed race, but I fear you already knew that . I sense antisemitism disguised as righteousness.  

[thatguywiththecape]

Anyone who even remotely thinks I might have liked the BBC / Netflix Drcaula will be blocked as a matter of principle...  That is all.

[thatguywiththecape]

[horrorandhalloween]

by RamyB

[cozyautumnspices]