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Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
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@the-arrows-arsenal
{So I’ve been working on remaking this as a non side blog for a while, and I’ve finally got it...mostly worked out. I’ll be messaging/ following those of you I’ve got active threads with over the next few days to talk about moving threads over and all that. In the mean time, feel free to checkout [email protected]}
“You spoil me.” He drawled, still slightly terrified of the fact that she’d somehow learned how to mimic his expressions perfectly. “Doesn’t mean you don’t still try to lie.” Seriously, how could anyone who spent their life being a freaking vigilante have such a bad poker face? Then again, it probably said more about Jason and the people he surrounded himself with rather than Roy that he considered the ability to lie with terrifying efficiency a prerequisite for life. “It’s an improvement.” He didn’t bother pointing out that if she hadn’t basically blown up the kitchen, it wouldn’t have needed cleaning to begin with–they both knew.
“Absolute bullshit.” It seemed he was taking this particular argument to his grave with him. Again. “I think you just want a stupid shirt.” Jason vehemently maintained that being number six on Interpol’s most wanted list was a grievous overreaction on their part. He refused to believe that there were only five people in the world that were greater threats to the continued existence of humanity than him. He could think of five people in the last week that deserved that more than he did. “No shirts.” Not that he actually thought saying that was going to stop her, but he could dream.
“You’re a puppy. Accept it.” Jason cocked an eyebrow at teh other, looking almost amused, or as much as he could given the situation. “Oh, I’m sure.” Okay, so he might actually be a little convinced about the ripping his head off thing–archer’s had a terrifying amount of upper body strength and he really doesn’t want to think about the potential for grievous bodily harm there. “I think master implies some kind of understanding of what the hell to do–which I lack greatly. I’d go more with a disgruntled alley cat if we’re sticking with the metaphor.” Him as a sociopath? Oh, it had been terrifying. It isn’t terribly often that he’s exceptionally grateful for Talia al Ghul–she did kind of bring him back to use as a bargaining chip–but her decision to send him to the All Caste had probably helped him avoid the number one spot on Interpol’s most wanted list. “Just be glad we met up when we did, and not sooner. And be very grateful for Ducra.” God knows he was–probably should have told her as much before she died.
He rolled his eyes, trying and failing to hide a wince as she touched his wrist. “If you’re not in immediate danger of dying, it ain’t a big deal.” Apparently this rule only applied to him, because lord knows how bad he got when it was him ( Or Kori, when she was still around ). “–I’m more attached to my hand, and y’know, living. Tear away.” He would have done it himself, but at this point, that would have involved having to do it with his teeth and he’d like to avoid that. Enough of him is in pain already without adding to it unnecessarily.
“Might even be one with sequins attached....or at least glitter.” She said fondly, she was becoming rather attached to this idea. “I try not very good at it though.” Actually, she didn’t think she was that bad, by Jason’s standards maybe, but she could at least fool the average person...most of the time anyway. She positively beamed at him. “See, I try.” And maybe if she would have tried a little harder they wouldn’t have had that problem to begin with, but really, the kitchen was the best place for her to work on trick arrow designs; and it wasn’t like she deliberately destroyed things, it was just a side effect of experimentation.
“Oh come on, nothing about the idea of team shirts appeals to you?” She already knew the answer to that was a resounding no, but she posed the question anyway. “I think it would be fun, you know, that thing people have that makes them happy....fun.” She made a suspiciously pouty face. “Fine no shirts...for you anyway.” She grumbled under her breath where, she had no doubt, he could still hear her.
If looks could kill, Jason Todd would be re-dead and buried. As it was, Roy doubted her glare stuck anything even remotely akin to fear in his heart. He’d known her too long to be truly afraid of her, most of the time anyway. “I’m not a puppy, and if you have to call me some form of canine, can you at least grant me the dignity of being a wolf cub? Oddly adorable and yet still capable of doing serious damage.” She squinted at him. “If I get to be a wolf then you can be upgraded to like...a panther or something.” as though this was some large bargaining chip in her battle to reclaim her status as something not of the puppy variety. “Oh, I’ve heard stories.”Well, more like she’d filed away every tidbit Jason had ever leaked about the time before they bet and from the picture she complied...” Believe me, I like you much better now than I think I would have then.” That was the understatement of the year. Jason now could be down right terrifying to those on the wrong side of him, but for his few friends....he was a marshmallow, not that she would call him that to his face, Jason then? Not so much. “Ducra has my eternal gratitude.” And she meant it. Not only for the sake of the world...because a non to sane Jason was not something that should be unleashed, but also because, she liked having him around. He was her best friend...and half of the reason she was alive right now. He was kinda, sorta, really important to her.
She rolled her eyes because it amazed her how utterly callous he could be when it came to his own life, but heaven forbid something happen to someone he actually cared about. “That’s what i like to hear.” She said chipperly, before ripping at the bottom half of the shirt. “Rocking the belly button look, how very 90′s boy band of you.” She said, trying to distract him from her binding his wrist. She wasn’t blind, she could tell he was in more pain than he was letting on- she might not have a poker face but she was damn good at telling when other’s were bluffing. “There we go, that should hold it it for a bit.”
"Oh, now you're shy?"
OUR CHARACTERS HAVE JUST HAD A ONE NIGHT STAND. IT’S MORNING AND MY CHARACTER HAS JUST COVERED THEMSELVES WITH THE BLANKET. SEND “OH, NOW YOU’RE SHY?” FOR MY CHARACTER’S REACTION.
“Shy?” Roy snorted, “Not so much.” She allowed the blanket to fall from her body. “That was more for your benefit than mine.”
Zatanna admired the hickey on the other girl’s breast. She’d done a pretty good job last night, apparently. Because this girl hadn’t left when the sun came up. “Just call me Zee.” She smiled and tried to act nonchalant when saying, “And don’t worry, I don’t remember your name either. I will definitely remember why I’m sore though because last night was- wow.” It was the first really good one night stand she’d had in a while. If she was careful, she could turn this into maybe a friends with benefits deal and keep nights like these going…
“Roy,” The girl said with a small laugh. “Technically Roya but....don’t call me that, ever.” She shook her head before giving Zee a self satisfied grin, “Guess I did my job pretty well then?” She questioned. She stretched out languidly, last night had been more than a little intense, but she’d enjoyed herself thoroughly. She wasn’t one for one night stands, at least not with people she didn’t know but...if the pleasant ache between her things told her anything, it was that it was definitely worth it.
“When the world stops giving me excuses to be paranoid, I’ll stop.” He replied simply, choosing not to comment on the trust thing. Jason didn’t really feel he needed to say it–of course he trusted them, they’d never given him a reason not to. Hell, they’d saved his sorry ass even when he didn’t want to be saved. “Worst part is the thing is actually named Batcow.” Not that Damian’s hobbies were the strangest by far, but still. A cow? Couldn’t he stick to household pets rather than going for the barnyard animals? “There’s not a single part of me that understands the brat on any level–and I plan on keeping it that way.” He was fairly certain that wasn’t just him, but rather a universal constant in which no one ever really knew what was going on in Damian’s head–and were probably happier for not knowing. “I draw the line at robot vacuums. Especially ones that eat the carpet.”
“I’m starting to figure that out, oddly enough.” With his face screwed up like he’d eaten something sour, all he could do was look at her like the eternal skeptic he was. “None of that makes any sense. Like, at all. Unless I was like…forty.” He wished he could say he’d thought about stranger things, but the logistics of his life as a hypothetical character in a soap opera pretty much took the cake. But y’know, that’s what happens when you stay up this late. At the very least, the bizarre conversation had been carried a way away from the original problem at hand–at the very least she seemed to be doing better. “Sounds like something you’d do. If you stopped thinking with your stomach so much, I’m horrified to think what you could do.” He wanted to say world domination or something of the sort, but honestly? Roy was too nice for anything like that. And really, nice wasn’t a word used too often to describe the people Jason tended to know. “Only thing that man can’t cook is waffles. Which, y’know, you’d think would make those dinners better, but…” Well, just like Jason and Roy had their inevitable bickering over the same damn things, the family had the inevitable topics that would cause full blown warfare at the dinner table. Oddly enough, this wasn’t caused by Jason as often as one might be inclined to think.
“I think after three days spent working a job that bad, we earned the rest.” Not that either of them were getting any real rest for obvious resons, but y’know, it was the thought that counted. And at the very least, they weren’t moving much–or being shot at. Which was always a bonus, in Jason’s mind at least. “Can’t tell if it’s more funny, or just sort of adorable.” For as terrifying, capable and intelligent as they both knew Kori to be–watching her trying to gain some kind of understanding of human culture was a source of endless entertainment.
“Then you’ll be paranoid till the day you die.” She said, flopping her head back dramatically, and hitting it on the back out the couch. Ouch. “Not that i’m one to talk...just stating a fact.” She didn’t have to clarify, they both knew the world was a harsh place. “Batcow?” She wrinkled her nose. “I was just joking I didn’t think he’d actually call it...” She shook her head. “Kid’s fucking weird.” There was some measure of affection in her words, but the majority of it was masked by by the absolute feeling of exasperation Damian made her feel. The kid was unbelievable. Then again, considering who his parents were, could she really blame him? “Play nice , or I’m building you one for Christmas.”
“SORAS,” She said with a shrug. “Soap Opera Rapis Aging Syndrome. It’s where you can rapidly age a character up in just a few years, then leave other characters the same age for like twenty. There’s a whole Wikipedia page devoted to it.” She said nodding her head sagely. “If I stopped thinking with my stomach I’d probably cure cancer or make world peace” She said, “Unfortunately, I can’t so diseases keep happening, and no world peace. Probably for the best, we’d be out of work if that were the case.” She tilted her head questioningly. “Waffles?” Roy let out a laugh. “Alfred can cook foods I probably can’t even pronounce but he can’t make one of the simplist...shit, even I can do waffles.” She cocked her head, “Seriously, it’s one of like five things I can make without burning down the house or..you know...getting angry and throwing things.”
“I’d say we deserve a break. Doubt we’ll get much of one but...” She shrugged, “I’ll attempt to remain optimistic.” She offered him a small smile. The past few days had been rough but they would get better....eventually. “Bit of both.” She admitted, “Though, now that I think about it, Kori kinda looks like an anime character, doesn’t she? Huh, no wonder she liked it so much.” It was true, with her wide green eyes and orange skin, the alien princess looked like something straight out of some of the television series she was constantly glued to.
Only Call that Matters
Alexis was eternally grateful for Roy’s ability to think ahead. At least for these things, that wasn’t always the case when Arsenal was in the field. Felicity could help her deal with these things. Not to mention she’d prevent Alexis from hacking into too much while bored.
“No visiting hours will be great. I can live without it but I just would rather not. Thank you.” As she spoke she made grabby hands towards Roy and the laptop. Eventually she’d talk about tonight and what happened but it was too close. Too soon. Talking about it would do more damage than anything.
“Can live without it...right?” She drew it out as she handed the laptop over to Alexis with a laugh. She was glad to see that, at least when it came to her computer, Alexis was acting relatively like herself. It might be a small thing, but it was still....something.
“If you want.” She said carefully, still trying to avoid talking about Alexis’s deceleration of feelings. “I can stay with you some while you’re getting better; give you a hand with stuff since you’re supposed to be resting...give us a chance to...talk...spend some time together.”
00:00:00
Roy rubbed her wrist uncomfortably. She wasn’t nervous, per se, bu there was a feeling of…something as the numbers trickled down. Most people seemed to equate finding their soulmate with a happy ending: Roy knew better. Her mother had been her father’s soulmate,hadn’t stopped her from leaving them. And Oliver and Dinah God, she snorted, they were impossible. Thirty seconds, and she was begging to wonder if maybe she was broken somehow because there wasn’t a damn person around that she hadn’t seen before. Wouldn’t really be so bad being alone, she’d seen others who didn’t have a soulmate and they were…fine. Like Batman. Ok maybe not fine but….
Her head turned as a tall dark haired girl walked in. And, ok, maybe she wasn’t quite what she was expecting but…her breath hitched in her throat. Maybe there was something to this soulmate business after-all.
Zatanna gave a look up and down over Roy’s body, currently clothed, and made the verbal assessment, “You know, you don’t look quite like an overly acrobatic type, but if you say you can do the splits, then I’ll believe it because today has been that kind of day where I don’t know why I should be even remotely surprised. A flexible, beautiful vigilante. What else can you surprise me with, Roy Harper?”
For the moment, she was excited at the prospect of basically being able to dress Roy in whatever she wanted. She’d have to figure something out before show time. Something creative. And just as sultry as her own costume. “I can promise you that this isn’t a kink club. But that doesn’t mean I’m not kinky.” She snagged a pair of handcuffs off a table they were walking past on the way to her dressing room before looking over her shoulder to wink at Roy. “It just doesn’t hit the stage.”
“EH, I had a lot of practice. I was never as flexible as say Nightwing but...” She shook her head, “I did have to learn some acrobatic skills, comes with the vigilante territory.”” She shrugged. “Oh, you know,” A smirk crossed her face, “I am a woman of many talents, guess you’ll just have to discover them.”
She raised her eyebrows. “Oh really now, and uh, what kinda kinks do I have to look forward to? “ She followed after her, like some sort of eager puppy. “I mean, i like a bit of kink myself but...you’re not gonna go all Christian Grey on me are you? Cause I draw a hard line at that insanity.”
"Roy, do you ever think we'll be that obnoxious old married couple?" /god yes,I love truth serum shit.
“According to Oliver we already are that obnoxious married couple; but he’s probably just jealous and we should all ignore him.”
“If we ignored Oliver any harder and I think we’d be kicked from the team. We are kind of annoying though. I like it though.”
“He can’t get rid of us. He’ll threaten it, but secretly he liked having us around. Besides, Felicity wouldn’t let him kick us off the team. She liked having you to geek out with.”
☁
Roy buried her face in her hands. “Dick is gonna kill me for saying this, Jesus.” She shook her head and sighed before lifting her head and giving her best flirtatious grin. “ Look, Tim, you’re like a genius, I’m pretty sure you know some sex positions I’ve never even heard of which…kinda a turn on all by itself. Not to mention,” and her smile turned almost predatory, “ You’re always so..detached…in control. I kinda just wanna tie you up and tease you until you beg me to fuck you.” She smirked, “What do you say?”
“It’s— Roy, don’t make that… Damn it, the face is just not fair! Fine, three more kisses, and then we can give it a shot? Can’t blame me for negotiating, right?”
▢
“Alexis what hell are you doing under there?” Roy managed to ask, after she’d nearly choked on the water she’s just swallowed.
Alexis instinctually moved away away from Roy as if she’d understand the coding on her screen. “It is. I’ll show it to you after this last firewall. Quit peeking.” There was no chime this time as she resumed her coding with small breaks before she resumed and finally put the device into her pocket. “Army is a bitch. Have I ever mentioned that?” she commented offhand before a deer in headlights expression crossed her face.
“The army?” She questioned, unable to decided whether she should be upset at the obvious law breaking her girlfriend was engaging in, or excited by the prospect of a present that Alexis was clearly going to great lengths to procure. “You hacked army computers for me?” She asked, deciding to be grateful.
ʘ‿ʘ
SEND A ‘ʘ‿ʘ’ IF YOUR MUSE FINDS MY MUSE ATTRACTIVE.
“Feeling’s entirely mutual, baby bird.”
“Can you even blame us? I mean me especially with the whole hormonal stage and all that–”
“You know, I think I have a leather catsuit lying around...if you’re interested in making some of those teenage fantasies become a reality. “
"Oh, now you're shy?"
OUR CHARACTERS HAVE JUST HAD A ONE NIGHT STAND. IT’S MORNING AND MY CHARACTER HAS JUST COVERED THEMSELVES WITH THE BLANKET. SEND “OH, NOW YOU’RE SHY?” FOR MY CHARACTER’S REACTION.
“Shy?” Roy snorted, “Not so much.” She allowed the blanket to fall from her body. “That was more for your benefit than mine.”
“Just checking,” she sighed in relief, again running a hand through her hair. Zatanna shifted underneath the blankets, making sure she wasn’t laying on anything important, like her wallet or maybe a toy. She wasn’t sure what all had happened last night, just that it had been dark and there was hot sex. Shit, she was still sore from it even, she realized upon moving. “Because you look so young. And your breasts are really perky.”
“I’ll take that as a compliment.” She said with a laugh, shifting to where she was face to face with the other girl. “but I turn twenty next week, so I’m not exactly a baby” She shook her head and frowned slightly, “Look, I hate asking this but, uh, what was your name again? I mean not that last night wasn’t memorable, cause it was-” She gestured to what appeared to be a hickey near her breast- “But your name...” She winced slightly, “kinda escapes me. Sorry”
{Going to the movies so replies won't be up till later...in the eantime feel free to bug me
Do it! I believe in you. The worst that could happen is they say no.
{Awww, thank you, you're like....my anonymous fairy godmother.}
Just show up in their inbox like "I ship the thing. Do you also ship it? Wanna see how that goes?"
{You know.....at some point when I'm terribly sleep deprived and possibly inebriated this may actually happen :-)}
Approach the person. Ship the thing.
{How does one even do that? Seriously pretty sure every shippy thread I have on here had been by meme or happy accident}
{To stop being a coward and approach someone about shipping or not, that is the question}
"Oh, now you're shy?"
OUR CHARACTERS HAVE JUST HAD A ONE NIGHT STAND. IT’S MORNING AND MY CHARACTER HAS JUST COVERED THEMSELVES WITH THE BLANKET. SEND “OH, NOW YOU’RE SHY?” FOR MY CHARACTER’S REACTION.
“Shy?” Roy snorted, “Not so much.” She allowed the blanket to fall from her body. “That was more for your benefit than mine.”
“Good thing you’re pretty,” she breathed with a smile, looking this girl (had she forgotten her name this easily?) up and down. “Because it makes me not want to kick you out so much.” She shifted in the bed, propping herself up, and tousled her own hair a bit. The whole time, her eyes stayed on the stranger’s naked body. Beautiful was an understatement. “Hey, uh, you’re legal, right?” she asked real quick, realizing that the other girl looked a little younger than her and didn’t want to run into a bigger problem here.
“Being pretty is among my many talents.’ She said with a self satisfied smirk, she stretched out lazily. As far as one night stands go, she had managed to A) not get kicked out and B) not immediately regret it the next day. In fact....the other girl was...very, very nice to look at. She groaned at the question. “Perfectly so, I can buy cigarettes and everything.” One day, she would be grateful for her youthful looks. Today wasn’t it.
