The look of anguish and resentment in Hankâs eyes had Connor shirk back a little, he really must be in some deep shit. Even when the other told him he was okay so monosyllabically he knew that just wasnât true. But he didnât know what to do, heâd already said sorry and he knew that he didnât mean it because he wasnât sorry for his actions, just sorry that it caused Hank pain.
As Hank plugged in his seatbelt Connor copied him and watched the fog melt away as the carâs fans got to work. Hankâs voice rumbled again telling him he was fine, and that also confirmed that he just wasnât. Why tell him twice? âHomeâ Connor paused a little, the concept of having a home was still alien to him even though heâd been staying with the Lieutenant for some time.   âHome sounds good.â Â
He watches the bricks of the alleyway slowly pass him by the silence of the car was heavy as if he was being crushed below the vehicle itself. Connor couldnât just sit here in silence, this happened every single time he got into bother. Brief words and then heavy silences for the rest of the night, sometimes longer. Â
âHank, I, I think we should talk about yo- our personal issues.â The Android was scared to broach the subject and fidgeted, his hands were suddenly so interesting. Connor was remarkably like a child when they had done something naughty. He couldnât meet Hankâs eye and felt it hard to formulate the words he wanted to say.
But should he tell a half truth or the truth. Or maybe just lie, he was very good at telling lies.
Even though his expression hardly shifted Connor was clearly finding it hard to articulate himself âI know I shouldnât be so insubordinate.â He started slowly, fuck Hank was going to wonder what the actual fuck was wrong with him for this he could tell.  âI just donât want harm to come to you, I, canât help it. When I calculate a possibility that you could be injured I panic.â Â
The Android turned away as he started to babble a little âItâs part of my programming to protect humans if possible, but youâre my friend, and I feel guilty for hurting you, but...â Â
âI canât do this.â Connor hid his face in his hands giving a long exhale, what a mess. He wasnât crying but felt overwhelmed. It was like every emotional response possible was trying to force itâs way out of him, he didnât know if he should, cry, scream or laugh. âIâm scaredâ
And scared of being alone.