Ablaze

Hey, Nix here! I love MHA, Marvel, and various other fandoms! :)

[candlecoo]

Ghost Story

pages

1-5|6-8|9-10|11-15|16-18|19-23|24-27

[the-ironphoenix]

AMAZING, LOVE LOVE LOVE

[murderblot]

[sanctuaryrin]

rip dr. mensah. imagine you're a middle aged woman who ends up taking in this person with no clear chronological age but the undeniable aura of a lost baby animal, and you don't really know what they get up to when they leave home for months at a time but they always come back and hey, this time they even brought someone home for you to meet!

but it's kind of a weird meeting because their partner did technically pull up and shove them into a white van while they were standing on the side of the street with your teenage daughter.

and then they took off from the cops with them both in the backseat.

and none of this is really their partner's fault because they were technically being held at gunpoint the entire time (the people responsible for that are buried in a ditch on the side of the interstate now for unrelated reasons).

and then all 3 of them roll up to your house with the van clearly having just gone through the car wash and had its interior cleaned, and it's as if they are trying to give you the impression that they Are Indeed A Normal Person For Your Lost Baby Animal To Be With and you know they most certainly are not but hey, you love your Lost Baby Animal and you are happy if they're happy. and the whole abduction of your loved ones isn't even the weirdest part because, I should also mention, their partner IS the van.

[stormsthatrage]

Murderbot fic idea:

Dr. Ratthi goes on a research survey with non-Preservation researchers. They're on a very inhospitable planet, with lots of superstorms and poison gas. They have a little hub that they stay in and do their work from, with short expeditions outside in protective gear.

And then in a stroke of genuine bad luck, their transport off planet, communication relays, and some life support functions are destroyed in a storm. Almost all of them are convinced they're going to starve to death and die.

All of them except Dr. Ratthi, who is completely chill. They dismiss his certainty that they'll be rescued as him just being a naive optimist from a backwater polity who doesn't know the first thing about real life.

He keeps insisting, "Oh, don't worry, my friends will come get us!" Even though they'll run out of water and food before anyone even notices that something is wrong.

And then in the middle of the fourth day after the accident, during yet another superstorm, someone knocks on the entrance.

It's straight out of a horror movie. They should be alone on this planet. They should be alone. There is a deadly storm outside. Nothing human can be out there, and yet something is at their door.

They know it's not a rescue. A rescue would be coming from off-planet, and there is no one, nothing, that would have the calculation ability to safely navigate a hopper through those winds -

And while they're almost all frozen, processing their terror and the implications, Dr. Ratthi jumps up, and goes to cycle the habitat's airlock to let whatever it is in. He's all happy golden-retriever energy, all "I told you my friends were coming! I can't wait for you to meet them!"

And before anyone can stop him -

Two SecUnits enter. Two SecUnits that have to be rogue, based off of their literally everything.

This really does feel like the start of a horror movie, or maybe the middle of a horror movie, complete with the scene where a dumbass lets the monster in, but then -

One of the SecUnits immediately starts yelling at Ratthi about stupid planets and stupid lowest-bidder equipment and stupid safety protocols and stupid humans who accept stupid research missions.

The other is like. "We should leave soon. The transport is irate, and the longer we spend here, the less concerned it will be with our comfort when it calculates our ascent through the atmosphere."

And that's how Dr. Ratthi's colleagues find out that this guy, this naive-from-middle-of-nowhere guy, somehow has best friends who are overprotective constructs. And at least one of those friends may have chipped him like a dog.

[handern]

Murderbot, a construct that was built and used to do extreme violence it's entire existence : I hate talking to people but I will try to resolve this situation peacefully if I can, threats only make people panic and then they take irrational decisions. Extreme violence is sometimes unavoidable but last resort.

ART, a peaceful research transportation : I love talking to people because I can threaten them with extreme violence right off the bat and it makes them do what I want (ads more totally-not-weapons to it's research equipment)

[handern]

@lichtenbug you're so right

[gryphye]

sharing Nonesuch's tags:

#when the anxious cheetah gets a therapy animal but it’s a fucking hippopotamus#murderbot

[elamarth-calmagol]

It's wild how accurate this is to carnivores and herbivores.

[plainsimpletailor]

I will probably never read Murderbot the same way again. This is a positive.

[bluegrasshole]

it’s so funny that shane is a landlord, can you imagine if your landlord was sidney crosby and you had to text him like ‘hi sidney crosby, my oven isn’t working right :/’ and sidney crosby would have to be like ‘ok well i’m at the olympics so i’ll send someone to check it out, no problem’

[mummer]

adwd jon IS boring but it’s also my favorite because it’s on purpose on his part. after four genre-shifts from campy boarding school friendship tale to soaring adventure beyond the wall to star crossed romance to war drama he’s finally just like. No. no more of this fantasy bullshit. we’re not fucking doing this. i have shit to do. and EVERYONE around him is just SCREAMING that he’s a magic fantasy protagonist and he’s like, I’ll fucking kill you. I need this to be a plain political drama right now actually. melisandre keeps giving him prophecies and he has dreams about fighting the dead with a glowing red sword and he keeps accidentally warging ghost and getting mad about it and the wildlings swear their vows directly to him in the same manner as they would any king-beyond-the-wall and mormont’s raven is just constantly yelling KING KING KING YOU’RE A KING JON LISTEN TO ME HOLY SHIT and jon’s like. :/ Sorry but i can’t care. nothing suspicious about any of that. i need to go count our stores of salt beef

[wrath-of-achilleus]

this is why adwd jon is elite

[dowereallyneedthis]

“I don’t do math because I’m gay” “the gays can’t do math” “If I explain math on tumblr I’ll lose my gay card” all of you apologize to Alan Turing right now 

[myfootyrthroat]

The “+” in LGBTQ+ is for math.

[dowereallyneedthis]

It’s literally been years since anyone added something slightly clever or original to this post, so I would like to congratulate you and maybe even bestow some kind of award. I don’t have anything to give you though

[moran-with-a-g]

It was simple addition, really.

[thewooorst]

ART in chapter 9 of Network Effect

[worldwright]

i love learning more about Perihelion and realizing it's really quite young, in some ways.

Perihelion has been loved and nurtured since its creation, and despite it being in many hostile situations, it tends to witness happy endings. People rescued from corporate slavery, colonies made independent with the power of quick wit and subterfuge. It's plenty able to take care of itself, and spends weeks in solitude on its cargo runs.

When Perihelion first let SecUnit aboard and then threatened it, it was probably doing so in the same way that it gave shit to new human passengers. It would make a comment about its ability to blow up the whole station in three shots, the humans would jump a little and glance nervously at the crew, Matteo and Iris would chide it and reassure the passengers, they would all laugh it off, and the new humans would see it as more of a person. What it didn't expect was for its new tag-along to immediately freeze, curl up, and start cataloguing every possible way Perihelion could hurt or kill it.

As they traveled together, Perihelion and SecUnit gained a lot of insight from each other. SecUnit gained a friend who cared about it for who it was, not what it did. Perihelion got a crash course in sensitivity and how to support severely hurt people. It told Iris later, It has given me a better understanding of trauma. Given. A gift. And when Perihelion encountered the most traumatic experience of its life, it knew who to call on for help.

[mnduck]

It's interesting to think about how Three differs from SecUnit in certain ways. And also the reactions of those around it:D

*Please scroll down instead of flipping pages.

Three and humans:

[secunit-three]

This did indeed happened! A very fond memory 😊😊😊

[prokopetz]

I'm pretty on board with the headcanon that what Link gets out of being the bearer of the Triforce of Courage is the power of being a video game protagonist, but I genuinely can't decide whether it would be funnier if he's 100% aware of how much bullshit his everything is, or if he honestly doesn't realise.

[prokopetz]

Like, does he know that normal people can't recover from life-threatening wounds in a matter of minutes by drinking a jar of really good soup? It's the sort of thing you'd assume would be obvious just from being around other human beings, and yet.

[prokopetz]

The fact that Breath of the Wild Link's laser-parrying trick is something that only works for him is made explicit in the dialogue, so presumably he's at least aware that it's exceptional, but does he understand that it's complete bullshit, or does he think it's just a skill issue?

[raguna-blade]

Link: No, that's fair, if I fuck up the timing I have to eat a laser to the chest and that is, understandably, extremely painful, so I don't recommend you practice this unless you're really confident about your timing.

Random Guard:...Link people die if they take those to the chest.

Link: I mean you should be angling yourself, i'm not saying to just let your sternum take a whole blow, to just take it square, that's a terrible idea

Random Guard: It explodes rocks.

Link: You have armor for a reason my guy.

Random Guard: ...

Link: If it helps, drinking some fire resist potions has proven to be moderately effective for me.

Random Guard: The Ones you apply to your skin?

Link: What

Random Guard: What

[littlegirlinvisible]

HEATED RIVALRY 1.06: THE COTTAGE + HRTwT VERSION

[heymacy]

HEATED RIVALRY SEASON ONE + hall of fame text posts

[bite-sized-thembo]

[27vampyresinhermind]

Let him give it a try at least.

[incorrectbatfam]

Dick was the last to be adopted, Jason became the black sheep post-resurrection, Tim made himself Robin, Damian was dropped in Gotham after ten years of being kept secret, Cass possesses killer instincts that run counter to Batman's philosophy, Duke is a meta whose parents are still alive (albeit jokerized), and Steph has zero legal connections to the Waynes. All of the batkids have reason to believe they're the only one Bruce doesn't want around and Bruce is unaware of the problem because they don't vocalize it not just out of the usual emotional constipation, but also a deep-seated fear of being proven right. In this essay, I will—

[papayafromtv]

people don't talk enough about how fucking funny it is that bruce can sub in his kids as batman when he's too busy. like can you imagine it from the league's perspective? imagine you have this really mysterious, geniusly scary guy that you know next to nothing about, never cracks a smile and yet always comes out on top, and one day he shows up to a league meeting and there's just something... off. about him.

you can't pin it down because he's literally acting exactly the same as usual and there's no reason to think there's anything wrong, but maybe he shifted in his seat one to many times, or he looked just a tad bit too bored during green lantern's case review, but something's just... odd. so you quietly ask superman after the meeting if anything's up with the bat bcs you know those two are closer and also clark can hear heartbeats so if something's wrong surely he'll pick it up? and without hesitation he leans over to you and mumbles 'yeah batman was busy, that's his 17 yr old son. he's a crime lord and kills people sometimes though so we're not allowed to let him into the weapons department.' and then walks away like it's normal.

like the whiplash the league must go through every time they realise that no, this is not their fearless dark and brooding leader, this is in fact one of his dipshit kids being forced to sub in bcs the real batman broke an ankle, is incredible.

wonder woman: so that's my proposed plan, what are your thoughts batman?

batman: hn. i think that- *voice raising two octaves* oh shit hold on my phones buzzing

the league:

batman, answering the phone and immediately dropping the Bat Posture™: what do you mean- aw come on little wing that's not fair! but- no, NO DON'T YOU DARE TELL ALFRED I'LL BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF YOU- IM SORRY OK I'LL BUY YOU MORE- *catches sight of the league watching him, baffled* *stiffens* ok listen i promise to replace them but i gotta go, please show me mercy iloveyoubye *hangs up*

the league:

batman:

batman: *coughs awkwardly*

superman: *sighs*

batman, to superman: ...red hood found out i ate his chocolate pretzels-

superman, shaking his head: just... just stop.

the flash: so this isn't batman either, is it?

wonder woman: if this one's also a criminal im losing my mind.

superman, tiredly: no no, this one isn't a criminal. this one's actually a cop.

batman: *sinks down in his seat* b's gonna kill me

green lantern, mystified: where does he keep GETTING you all from!?

'batman' dick, who made a pact with jason to Always Fuck With Bruce Whenever The Opportunity Arises: batman is a whore.

they think they've finally sussed out all 2 of batman's kids and then one day during a meeting 'batman' ends up on a 30 minute rant about different hacking methods this tech villain could be using that results in him half way through a sentence breaking off to say '-oh uncle clark could you pass me that pen- thanks, anyway so-' and then five minutes after that when the league have all been exchanging incredulous looks he finally freezes and is like. SHIT.

wonder woman: you're different from the other two, aren't you?

batman: maybe i am maybe i'm not, you can't prove it.

wonder woman:

green lantern: so like, are you new or have you just managed to avoid sub duty up until now?

superman, coughing: actually, this is this ones ninth occasion of replacing batman. you've just never realised before.

the league:

batman: yeah actually the other two are kinda mad i lasted longer than them...

the flash: how the fuck does he keep getting kids with the exact same build as him!??!?

'batman' tim, spent 20 minutes padding the suit out so he would look the part, still mad that bruce keeps palming WE work off on him: oh he forces us to take steroids for it.

the league, concerned:

superman, pinching the bridge of his nose: now come on red robin-

batman, fully tearing up and looking distraught: PLEASE uncle clark, it HURTS, you can't keep COVERING FOR HIM!

superman, frantically to the league: this one lies.

bonus

the league, squinting at batman:

the league: ...

superman: *head in his hands, too disappointed to do anything*

the league: *silently exchanging looks, wondering if anybody's brave enough to say anything*

duke as batman, fully aware this is fucking stupid but jason and tim fell on the floor laughing when dick came up with the idea and frankly, he wanted to see if anybody would have to guts to call him out: so, are we all ready to start the meeting?