a goodbye...? (from writing...? ) i don't know </3
so hello. i have been dead for a long time, i know. i'd like to say that i'll no longer be writing since life has made me busy... i have been dealing with my thesis and preparing for my internship next term </3 and i just haven't gotten back to kpop that much again (and jumped into the final fantasy fandom because i have been playing a few of the games throughout the year now lmao (pls talk to me if u have played any of them jk))
with that said, thank you so much for the opportunity to let me write and express whatever's in my head. thank you for reading my shit since i started college. I AM GRADUATING NEXT YEAR... probably around june next year WTF.
as much as i ache to write again, i don't have the time and passion to write fics for kpop specifically. maybe for the ff fandom? who knows? i don't know. i just know that i probably wouldn't write here again.
WARNING! will use this blog to reblog about ff stuff now, especially that really has been my #1 hyperfixation recently lmao!
still, feel free to talk to me, even kpop, since i still get the updates about my faves from time to time! i just haven't obsessed with it as much as before, that's pretty much the difference... like wtf i'm devastated that i wouldn't be able to see twice AGAIN! and day6 too ugh
that is all for now 🫡 thanks a lot! it has been a great 4 years! <33
pairing: non-idol!seungmin and gender-neutral!reader
featuring: several skz members, an oc
genre: angst, fluff, sci-fi, rival gang au, forbidden lovers au
warnings: spoilers from the book of inspiration (chloe gong’s these violent delights), inappropriate language, mentions of death and murder, use of weapons, political issues, sensitive content (killing, blood, character death), and jisung being a weirdo (:/// sorry)
word count: 11.6k words
synopsis: the blood painted on the floor after another tragic night will mean three things for you and seungmin: your revenge, his will to live, and family rivalry.
mini-playlist: link here
tag list: @awooghan @hwangsify @xiaoderrrr @cosmic-railwayxo
note: oh wow i broke my record of my longest fic LOL here’s a revised and extended version of my beloved painting faith :ppp i believe this is slightly messy bc i literally rushed to finish this and i’m already posting this at 1am lmao but i still love what i wrote here regardless :D i really love this fic with all of my heart so i hope you will too! hope you enjoy <33
You want to crumble in regret as you finally step in front of a door inside the palace. You simply felt the need to get out of here. You’re not supposed to be here. There are more important matters than attending a ball hosted by a family you didn’t even dare to think of. Even a prize like not getting bothered by a prick—your cousin, Minho—for one whole night doesn’t even give you much enthusiasm to endure the night.
Choosing to risk your life to finish one hell of a mess in the town for an extra night is much better than stopping over for one night to not do anything related to that said mess. Merely thinking of the idea that Minho would still be here, just with a different set of people, and your father by your side is enough to eat you up and get buried on the ground. This is obviously why you avoid any family matters that need extra companions—you, in this case, since you were told by your family to join this specific event.
You push on the door. You walk around the wide function room, eyeing the glittering chandeliers above your head. You admit this is a beautiful venue for the grandest events. But it is not surprising that the function room is gorgeous because of the Figueroa family—a family you inexplicably loathed.
The growing madness around the past month has made your stomach filled with nervousness for days. You fear the city would change and be more in danger. The horrendous monster took so many lives of commoners and Leyva members already by a simple insect infestation that will lead these people to rip their throats. You don’t want to hear more of that.
hey riel!! hope you’re doing well❤️ you should do whatevers best for you in terms of writing, your intimate life is the highest priority. the ff community is going to miss your writing though, it’s always incredible :,) also jfc, you’re old… you’re going to crush your last yr of uni & that upcoming internship, lots of hugs🫂
-leo
HI LEO OMFG im so sorry this ask has been here for MONTHS lmao 😭 just reinstalled tumblr again today help
THANK U SO MUCH! i'd like to share that im on my final weeks of my internship and i'm finally gonna be done with uni soon 😆 took me almost my entire internship before i got back to you i guess? 😭 (and hey, im not that old! i just turned 22?! jk i get it 😩)
i swear i have been itching to write for ff (and maybe lads) but im not in the right headspace for it yet because of my brain rn is just: work, but who knows? maybe when i'll be unemployed in the future, i'd get back to it? 😆 jk
i missed you sm leo 🥹♥️ i hope you're doing well and you're staying healthy! let's talk again soon, lots of hugs back to you!!!
hey riel! thought i'd pop in to say hi, i haven't seen you on my dash in a while, but i also haven't been very active here so 😅 how've you been?
OH MY GOD IT'S BEEN A LONG TIMEEEE!
i am doing fine, internship aside 😆 i've been serious with spending more time with family and hobbies outside of work hours... like no kidding i just played tlou for several hours straight with my dad emotionally supporting me by my side yesterday and i have no regrets at all ✋ LMAO i'm just surviving through my last few weeks for internship... and after all that, i'm good to graduate soon 🫡
and no worries tho, i just reinstalled tumblr again today to read stuff so i haven't seen anyone nor my dash here for months 😆 how've you been too??? i hope you're doing well ♥️ missed you and many people here!
pairing: suitor services officer!dino and admin support officer!gn reader
genre: fluff, light comedy, christmas au, college au
warnings: reader gets sick (stomach flu rip), some foul language (+ chan is down bad and dramatic)
word count: 7.8k words (i did NOT expect this at all)
synopsis: chan, who never lacked patience with you, has been courting you for almost a year. even with the treatment similar to an actual relationship, he never pushed you to give him your yes because he's just naturally down bad for you. but you make an effort to finally give him that sweet yes during the university tradition of the christmas tree lighting, even if that is scheduled during a hectic week, as an early christmas gift to him. that guy already freaks out and combusts with your simple words. what more if you finally seal that approval of being in a relationship?
taglist: @planetkiimchi @dreamcsc @reiofsuns2001
note: it's finally here! ngl it's kinda messy bc i'm really rusty in writing rn, so expect that there is more to this (many stuff is in here that is not indicated in the synopsis for the sake of the flow of the main part lol) but yk i enjoyed this, i seriously told myself that i want to finish this before the year ends so here is my late christmas and early new year's gift lmao i wrote this continuously for some reason and i slightly strayed from the original plot/synopsis,,, so enjoy ig?! happy new year to everyone!
this is a part of the printed pages & red-inked hearts series. you can check out the masterlist here!
Seungkwan rolls his eyes and groans, leaving Vernon cackling over his friend’s reaction to the entrance of you and Chan.
“Chan used to be so cool and well-put before he started courting _____. Now, there are heart eyes always so visible on his eyes.” Seungkwan furrows his eyebrows and points using his lips at the two of you, giggling at each other near the counter, “I don’t know if I should find that endearing or disgusting for Chan, honestly.”
On the other hand, the two of you are having a bickering session regarding your residency hours record. You struggle to keep your laugh as you lightly scold Chan, “I told you to write legibly, Chan! We can’t tell when you come in and out here sometimes, and it’s hard to read your timestamps!”
“Says the one who infamously has the messiest handwriting!” Chan exclaims and laughs out loud while rewriting the timestamp for the start of his residency hours. He wrote the time again and again on the same spot, making it look harder to read because of how thick the four numbers are.
You click your tongue and shake your head. There is always something to counter in light bickering between the two of you. You softly push his arm, “I’m going to shorten your total residency hours of the term if you keep on writing messily, Chan!”
Chan, who spots the Administrative Support Director at the other end of the counter near the wall, calls for his attention. “Jeonghan, there will be a discrepancy in my total residency hours because of _____! They’re gonna shorten my total hours—”
“It’s protocol to write legibly, Chan! Illegible timestamps will always be disregarded and not counted!” you quickly cut him off before Jeonghan even tries to give you two a word. To be fair, Jeonghan has a very long patience, so he might just laugh along with you.
“It will definitely be shorter if anyone in Administrative Support doesn’t understand what was written,” Jeonghan softly says to Chan with a smirk, enough to declare you as the winner of today’s bickering session. Jeonghan scratches his head and laughs after seeing his fallen face. “You’re very hardworking, Chan, and we love you for that. But it will always be a rule for everyone in DPL to write legibly for an accurate residency hour count.”
Chan hears a playful “told you so” from you as you grab the record and pen from his hands, writing the same timestamp as him under your name. Chan loses this quick game but always wins with how he can bond with your playful side. A side of yours that you often show with everyone but feels different in the context of courting.
Losing feels sweeter if he sees you sticking your tongue out and giggling to yourself in victory for some reason. He would rather experience losing this way, and there will be no ounce of regret in his feelings.
He quickly lost sight of you as you moved further into the office, way past the counter and to the back of the room to grab a correction tape from the small box of writing materials open to the members. You did what was needed—to clean up your suitor’s mess of handwriting.
Chan saw you use the correction tape to the exact spot where he repetitively wrote 14:26 and gently wrote over it much cleaner, similar to how you properly wrote the same timestamp under your name. He watched you do the entire thing with a soft smile on your face, gladly fixing his mess just because you feel like doing so.
The sight also makes him smile, apparently leaning onto the side of the counter. Things like this are not a big fuss to you, so you don’t mind helping him even with his handwriting, which is as messy as yours. Doing something small that doesn’t require your help is quite a natural response to you, which is a notable observation from Chan.
You look up to Chan across you, returning a more endearing smile as your eyes make contact. Out of nowhere in this mind, Chan just wishes you would stop smiling. He still melts too quickly with the warmth of your curled lips.
Raising up the residency hours record, you show him the now-fixed timestamp of Chan’s residency hours for the day, emphasizing your small accomplishment with your finger pointed to it. You can’t help but mouth words to Chan that nobody else needs to hear, “It’s all good.”
His restless heart was beating so loud. There was no holding back in telling you what his heart was screaming. “Thank you,” he inaudibly says to you, his right elbow comfortably placed on the counter, with his face leaning to his hand.
They couldn’t voice them with their full chests out of proper decorum. The other members might find it disgusting and improper in the supposed workplace, and you might get made fun of. Not that you fear the teasing. You’d rather maintain the peace in the rhythm of tiny displays of affection back and forth.
A screechy sound echoes from the door, breaking the bubble of silence between you and Chan. It startled both of you, making you chuckle and get back to proper positions—you sitting back properly on the seat and Chan standing up straight, away from leaning on the counter.
Seungcheol enters from the door and dashes to the front of all of you, a little past Chan and the counter. “I was told that there is a rush order. The contact person said that they’d need it in three days. I believe we should work on it right away,” Seungcheol says slowly, worriedly looking around to gauge everyone’s reaction.
Rush orders are typically a pain in the ass. You get to do too much work quickly, and your attention is fully needed to deliver efficiently and with good quality despite the unfortunate circumstances. Thankfully, DPL gets paid more with rush orders, which is desperately needed to compensate for sudden heavy work.
Jeonghan, feeling inquisitive, wants to ask more about this new work. He stands up, walks past the members on the long desk, and mumbles, “What’s the rush order for?”
“It’s for the research congress hosted by the university,” Seungcheol answered, hearing several responses of agreement from the members nearby. All of them seemed to remember the research congress all of a sudden. Seungcheol pulls up his phone and shows the email requesting the bulk order. Jeonghan also nods and replies, “Oh, right, that’s coming up pretty soon. That makes sense.”
As they converse further about the order and the upcoming research congress, Chan hops into the swivel chair to access the inbox and search for the client's email on the PC. He then asks someone nearby to prepare the other materials needed for this rush order.
“Seems like we need to print a bunch of laminated IDs.” Chan sighed, grabbed a small chunk of paper, and placed it in the support of the printer. “Didn’t we just print a ton of laminated IDs for an organization a few weeks ago as well?”
As a witness and part of what Chan was referring to, you hum in agreement and reply while setting up and turning on the laminating machine on the table near Seungcheol, across the large table and the counter, “Yeah, but, well, at least that wasn’t a rush order. We had a week to work on it and completed the order pretty early.”
Completing that order pretty early meant finishing everything in one day. Printing, laminating, cutting, hole punching, and replacing several rejects until closing hours. You do remember helping out and closing the office at 8 PM already. (Waiting until closing time wasn’t much of a bore since you and Chan were entertaining each other with endless talking and subtle affection the entire afternoon, as expected.)
Out of nowhere, you hear Seungkwan groan in annoyance behind you. “We don’t have laminating film!”
Before you even tell Seungkwan that you can get the refills with your raised hand, Seungcheol promptly senses your next move and tells you with his hand on your shoulder, “I’ll get it, _____. Just stay here.”
You slowly nod with a puzzling look on your face, pulling your hand back down. “Alright, then.”
Seungcheol walks and opens the storage room door limited to the executive board and Purchasing members. You look back to Seungkwan and ask instead, “What’s the size of the laminating film needed?”
Inside the storage room, Seungcheol hears Seungkwan yell, “Letter!” This made everyone laugh, even Seungcheol’s squeaky laugh echoing in the dim and cramped storage room.
Once you’ve got the laminating machine plugged in and turned on for pre-heating, you step away from it to avoid getting burned and hop onto the other swivel chair beside Chan.
You know what it means when both of you are seated beside each other in the DPL office…
“Will you be here for the Christmas festivities until next week?” Chan asks, glancing back and forth at you and the printer doing its job. “The uni has some stuff going on already. Have you strolled around the Christmas bazaar?”
“Not sure, depends on my schedule. Finals season is coming up, and I already have a couple of deadlines on the way.” You place your elbow on the desk in front of you beside the printer.
You sigh in despair. You’re not the most satisfied with the bazaar Chan mentioned. It’s finally your time to complain, “I already did my first rotation around the bazaar earlier. Tried to find some food to eat, but I just went for the same old pork tonkatsu meal from that same stall that’s been here since the previous bazaars.”
Vernon, who’s right behind you two, already laying out the paper cutter board, understands your disappointment. In a hushed tone, he butts in and moves a little closer to the both of you to share his sentiment spontaneously. “The bazaar’s not hitting hard as much as before. The same stalls have been invited in every bazaar that’s being arranged here. It’s not that exciting like they used to.”
You eagerly nod in agreement. “The best was the bazaar for the university week last year. Everything in the bazaar was so diverse! Couldn’t stop strolling around and do some window shopping back then.”
Vernon gasps and clasps his hands together. “I know, I know! That was the best, truly!”
Chan chuckles at you and Vernon’s enthusiasm. He really didn’t have much to say since the bazaar was just one thing he waited for. He waited for other events to focus on.
“The events now seem to be cool though,” Chan says while gathering the first batch of printed IDs. He passes the first 20 pages and asks those on the table, including Vernon, to cut the IDs out so they can be inserted into the laminating film and laminate them.
Vernon, still engaging in the conversation, squeals. “Yeah, the Christmas tree lighting and concert will be so fun! Are both of you guys going?”
Oh, right. The Christmas tree lighting and concert. You do think it’d be great to attend that, especially with the solid lineup included in the concert. However, you’ve got a final project to procrastinate, and the deadline’s on the same day as the Christmas tree lighting and concert.
Chan has no idea of that though. You’ve got a plan in mind already.
You look at Chan, tilting your head in intrigue. You can’t help but giggle at Chan’s look at you. His glimmering eyes look straight at yours, and it is very obvious that he’s waiting for your answer. Despite that communication through the eyes, he simply just looks like a lost child with those eyes and very slightly downturned lips. “But are you free on that day?”
Chan nods, also looking like a cute child with eager nodding, making you giggle once again. Chan feels his cheeks warming up and murmurs, “Of course, I don’t have classes on that day.”
Great! Everything will definitely be on track just by that single answer.
You’re fucked.
You’re fucking sick for the entire weekend, your stomachaches have been bringing you to the toilet, and your fever has been going up and down. That nuisance of a project will be pushed back until you can get up from your bed and have a quiet and peaceful stomach.
Chan already knows that you’re not feeling well because of stomach flu after you texted him earlier this morning that you might not show up at the DPL office for a day or two. He was very convinced that you were in a life-threatening sickness, offering a visit to your house (your parents’ house, to be exact—you came home from your dorm because of this sickness you can’t handle on your own) to check on you and drop off some medicine and food. And, of course, your parents can handle all of that, so you turned down Chan’s offer and told him to calm down and hope for the best of your condition instead.
Chan: Do you want me to look after you? Or just drop by, at least?
Chan: What type of food should you avoid if you’re having a stomach flu?
Chan: Nevermind, I’ll search that up
Chan: I’m still gonna give you food even if you don’t want to, by the way!
Everything was so wrong though. Everything is going downhill. You couldn’t even show up to Chan through the phone because you were repeatedly suffering in the bathroom, consistently unaware of your phone ringing at your desk.
You’re suffering. At the worst time of the term. At the worst season. Fate has brought you misery and declared to fuck up such timing of yours.
Despite not making enough progress in that final project, you were able to review for an upcoming exam adequately… an exam on the day after the Christmas tree lighting and concert. At least things seem to be in control in that area.
Thankfully, your exam today is online, and you don’t have to go to campus just to take it. You’d rather lock yourself at home than let strangers (classmates) and professors know you’re sick in the worst way possible and going in and out of the classroom to go to the bathroom. Who the hell would take stomachaches seriously as a medical excuse? That is part of human nature, they say.
Well, at least you got some sympathy from your friends, even your groupmates, who were informed that you’d be unable to attend the group meeting today to complete a different project.
What has been comforting you for the last couple of days was the only thing Chan had the timing right—cat and otter videos. You’ve been a cat person; cats are your number one weakness. You and Vernon even bond over cats at the office. As for otters, you just find them so adorable, and they admittedly look like Chan. Yes, he knows that you’re weak for otters because of him. The fact that they look too similar strangely makes you find more reasons to find Chan such a lovable, cuddly, sweet cutie pie.
You have such love and admiration for Chan already. It slowly grew stronger ever since he’s been making efforts to effortlessly show interest in you and shower his love for you. And, of course, it got to you too quickly. You fell deep earlier than you expected. Even your own family and friends have been bugging you to get out of the courtship phase because of how obvious that you can take this newly found bond with Chan more seriously. There’s too much love—it’s overflowing, hence why you planned to end the courtship and move on to an actual relationship during the Christmas tree lighting. It’s been long overdue, many say, but you really just tried to find the right timing. You wouldn’t want to tell your parents that you’re officially in a relationship with the guy on a random, normal day. And you’ve always been the type to plan anyway, and you don’t want to be spontaneous with something as special as this.
You simply have quite a comprehensive plan already. You just hope that your stomach flu won’t ruin all of it, as the Christmas tree lighting will be in two days.
Since you’ve been on your bed for too long these past few days, you have practiced in your head how you will do everything. At this point, you have mastered how to execute and tell Chan everything. You have finalized what to do and what to say. It’s almost like you’re preparing for a presentation that will reveal the fate of your grade.
It is kinda like that though. You believe this confession of yours will be as critical as Chan’s permission to court last year. He pulled it off so much, and you didn’t expect it at all, which meant that everything went according to plan for Chan. Now, you’re just aiming to reach a similar level in terms of giving the official status.
Now recalling it, he did find the right time to ask to court you as well.
It was also around Christmas when he asked for permission to court you. During the annual Christmas party of DPL, you mistakenly unnoticed his signs—he consistently picked you to be his partner in games; he gave some of his prizes to you because he “didn’t have enough space in his bag to put them,” which he actually did; he willingly sat beside you the entire party from start ‘til finish; and he walked you back to your dorm after accompanying you to dinner with some DPL members.
Chan showered you with all of his efforts before officially asking you to be courted. He has repeatedly shown that the ball will always be in your court right from the start as he asked for your approval for pursuing you right before you retreat to your dorm and after you thank him for sticking with you the entire day (because you’re not blind at all with that aspect).
“Will you let me court you?”—the unexpected question—was brought to you specifically. After initiating so many efforts with the decision in your hands, you believe you should be the one doing the same thing to him right when you start completely committing and take it to the next level.
Your train of thought ends with a shout of your name from someone downstairs, most likely your father. You assume you’re finally going to eat dinner already, most likely some porridge.
As you go downstairs from your room, you hear a unique voice that stands out. It is a voice you didn’t hear with your own ears for a couple of days, and it is a voice you least expected to hear in your household with this state of yours.
You race to the living room and are greeted by the one and only Chan with an oddly large plastic bag in hand.
“Hey, _____. Your suitor’s here. He has food for you,” your father tells you and leaves the scene. Chan sees you and swiftly places the plastic bag on the sofa. You grin, rush to the brunette, and run to his arms for a bone-crushing hug.
Chan murmurs your name, feeling your arms slink around his torso further. “I missed you. How are you feeling?”
You can’t help but chuckle, “Fever’s still a rollercoaster. I’m pretty sure the stomachaches would last until the end of the week, but I’m mainly hoping that the fever would be gone soon.” You feel Chan’s thumb rub on the small of your back and lean his head to yours.
Chan leans his head away from yours, making you look at each other. “How the hell did you get this flu?” Chan asks, annoyance completely evident in his voice. “You were so well and energetic last week, and all of a sudden, you told me that you caught stomach flu a few days ago?”
“I know, I know—”
“I’m so annoyed at the stomach flu, by the way,” Chan whines while holding his laughter, leaning his head back to yours. The laughter fades away and silences him as the fragrance of your hair lingers on him.
Chan moves his hand around your torso away, patting your hair. Stroking your hair, he mutters, soft and quiet enough for you to hear, “Just let me know if you still need my help, alright? I know you told me not to, but I’m always ready for you.”
I’m always ready for you. That speaks volumes and can be interpreted in different contexts. This man has prepared himself for so many things with you. He has won against everyone by a mile just by being this patient and easy to be with. Things have been easy for you for the past year because of him. He has always been there, so it's no wonder life has been treating you better lately.
Chan swears his heart could burst with everything going on right now. Your arms still entangled with each other, the excessively sweet words, and the peace and quiet. As you're still in tight hugs, he has been holding in his joy by pouting and tightly closing his eyes without your knowledge the entire time.
“Certainly.” You gently press your lips to his cheeks, making his eyes widen and jaw drop. “Thank you so much for dropping by. I absolutely appreciate it,” you sweetly tell him.
He leaves his other hand from your torso to touch the place where you pressed those lips of yours and grins widely, “Of course. Anything for you.”
You just can’t wait for the Christmas tree lighting.
Chan: Hey, you can catch up?
You receive a text as you rush to complete that final project in a class due the same day. You’re not obligated to push yourself too hard since you know you can finish it on time before 11:59 PM, but of course, you do things for love.
You pulled an all-nighter to finish that project several hours earlier to be able to make time for Chan and pull off this one hell of a plan of yours, apparently.
He is not aware of what you did, seeing your state of being busy since his visit to your home two days ago as your way to finish it early without the chances of cramming later in the day, which is partially true to your intentions. But, really, he has no idea that you also did all of that just to be able to catch up and attend a university tradition—the Christmas tree lighting—with him and say that yes already.
Seriously, you blame how this tradition always hits near finals week, hence why you never got to attend the lighting. You’ve always been busy during the university’s Christmas traditions to survive your final requirements. Hopefully, you get to experience it this time before you miss the chance next year because you’ll be busier by then.
Hello, Chan! Give me like half an hour… I’m not gonna be late, right?
Only the final touches are left, so you need at least half an hour to go through the entire paper and submit it. Finish the last paragraph of the conclusion, update the table of contents, review your groupmates’ work, and then you’re good. You might be able to do all of that in twenty minutes.
As you go through all that, you receive a message you decided to read through your lock screen.
Chan: Of course, _____! Take your time. There’s no need to hurry.
You go on and skim through the paper, which has over thirty pages of hard work from the past couple of days. You do not think of replying to Chan anymore, knowing that he is aware you’re in that moment of speeding things up without distractions.
On the other hand, Chan has been patiently waiting by the pillar near the tall tree a few meters away from him. He is naturally patient and long aware of how full your plate is very frequently. He doesn’t mind waiting, he has been waiting for you to officially claim his heart for a long time, after all. Waiting was not a tiring game between both of you, especially for him, obviously.
Chan easily notices how many of those who want to watch the Christmas tree lighting are also bundled in pairs. He quickly chuckles and shakes his head. His surroundings truly scream cliche, but he doesn’t mind at all. He’ll join in the cliche mood anyway once you arrive.
The sky is already dark at past five in the evening, but the buildings around the campus are bright with many lights hanging, and spotlights for the large Christmas tree are already open. Everything was illuminating on a windy dark night like this. Everything was so contrasting yet so beautiful.
There is this feeling bubbling inside him, and he breathes out heavily. It makes his knees weak and his heart beat faster. He unconsciously purses his lips and feels his palms sweaty. It’s a feeling he can’t completely decipher. It’s a mix of excitement and nervousness. Because finally, he gets to celebrate Christmas with you, but it’s your first Christmas together. Chan doesn’t see this as a bad thing, but he really can’t help but feel jittery and thrilled at the same time. The whole idea is just… nerve-wracking.
His phone vibrates in his pocket, and he quickly grabs it out, immediately guessing that you messaged. And his intuition never failed him, of course.
Hey, I’m all done! I’m on my way. I’m walking out of my dorm already.
Also, wait for me, please! Let me know where you are too. I missed you!
Oh, he wants to roll on the grass in happiness. Of course, he noticed the last three words first. He grins so widely and hops in place while squealing instead. He seriously couldn’t hold it in anymore.
He quickly messages his position around the area and instantly puts down his phone to look around to find you. In the last couple of minutes of waiting, a huge wave of people came in and scattered around the area, so he hoped that you wouldn’t stumble around somewhere else and lose your way to him.
Chan decided to keep still and await your presence. If there’s any emergency, you’d call him, right? You’d find your way to him for sure.
You greet him with a light grip on his forearm hanging on his side. Chan jolts at the surprise, your grip tightening ever so slightly to prevent him from tumbling down. You giggle at his reaction due to your prompt appearance, “I’m here, finally. You good?”
“Woah, you’re quick.” Chan scratches his head with his other arm, somewhat flustered at your entrance.
He suddenly feels the season's true spirit now that you’re with him. He could hear Christmas jingles in his head, the air became comfortably and tolerably chilly, and everything seemed brighter—even your eyes.
Chan beams at the reflection of the lights around you to your eyes. He wouldn’t say your eyes are blinding, but they’re rather alluring. He sighs because of those eyes. Your eyes that shined brighter than the sun. Your eyes that are full of life. Your eyes that become the star of his night sky. Your eyes that he adores so much.
The person behind those eyes has certainly lost control. The stare from your very own suitor makes you want to go straight to the point already, you can’t keep up with his eyes anymore.
You searched for him with quick legs and shaky hands because you knew tonight would be that night. You’re not sure if your hands are shaking because of nervousness or caffeine overload over your all-nighter earlier, you seem normal and lively for anyone.
Chan looks down and searches for your hands in your pockets. He pulls them out and holds them with both of his hands, widening his eyes. You eye at what he does with your hands—he rubs them with his own and blows them, hopefully giving you warmth even just a little bit in this breezy night.
“I hope that helps a little bit. Your hands were shaking when I held them,” Chan sweetly says to you. He presses his lips to the back of both hands and continues, “Should’ve told you to bring thicker clothing before you left though, I didn’t expect the wind would be this cold.”
You curse in your head too much because of how many times this man has unintentionally melted your heart. He has made your heart beat faster, made you stutter, and made you want to squeal. You would never get used to it, even after a year of pure intentions and sweet gestures and words.
“No worries, I did feel a little warmer after. Thank you.” You mean, your heart felt warmer?
You check the clock on your watch, displaying the time that is minutes away from the start of the Christmas tree lighting.
Unfortunately, one thing you have no idea about is when to tell Chan. This is your first time participating in the Christmas activities here. You’re oblivious to the flow of the program. You are pretty sure that you’re better off telling him right before the tree lights up though. Maybe you’ll settle with that instead.
You notice how dim the center of the quadrangle is. The star of the tall tree itself, almost as tall as a building, could almost substitute a star in the sky because of how high the tip of the tree is. It might shine brighter than the sun when it lights up because of its size. The small house beside the tree, which looks like a gingerbread house, also sits without any lights yet. Even some trees closest to the Christmas tree and house have fairy lights switched off. You guess they’ll be part of the lighting later on.
Once everything in the quadrangle lights up, Chan should know that you’re official. His one year of hard work has bloomed into something sweet and fruitful. The months where he proved his love and interest in you paid off because you want to be serious with him now. The idea of Chan pursuing you was once an unclear image in your head, but now, you can’t imagine where you’d be right now without him. You need him to stay with you for good.
You rock your feet back and forth, adrenaline slowly settling in. Your hands are still intertwined, making you wonder if Chan has noticed that your palms are heavily sweaty already.
You lean towards the pillar, keeping yourself still instead. “Do you have any plans this Christmas?”
Chan wonders with a visible question mark on his face. “Not really big plans, I’m simply going to spend Christmas with my family. That’s how we do it.” He pauses for a while, then nods. “Yeah, that’s pretty much it. Plus, if you're not busy, I might drive to your house to give you and your family something. You?”
“You don’t have to give something, by the way, but,” you hum, “my family and I will go somewhere this Christmas. We usually do that every Christmas.”
He coos, “That’s adorable. I’ll just give whatever we’ll give to you earlier then.” You nod in acknowledgment and thank him.
You drop your hands from Chan and step closer, shooting them into his jacket pockets. “The Christmas tree lighting’s kinda taking too long for me. Do you want to play a quick game?”
Chan chuckles and lets his hands gently join yours in his spacious yet small pockets. “Yeah, sure. What would the game be?”
This time, the ball is in his court, with the decision on his hands.
You quirk your eyebrow and smirk. “I’ll be asking you a few questions, and all you can answer is yes.”
Chan raises his eyebrows in curiosity. He wonders what in the world you would ask him that would make him answer unanimously. “Alright, game on!”
You laugh softly, “Let’s start out easy and simple. Are you feeling comfy with my hands in your pockets?”
Chan enthusiastically. “Yes. I actually love holding your hands, they fit very well with mine,” he winks at you, making you wheeze.
“Alright, I don’t know if that is genuine or not,” you humorously raise your eyebrows. Chan barged you with his words of defense, saying that he really loves holding hands with you. “You don’t have to tell me, I know that already,” you grin to tease and wink back.
Chan felt his heart drop with that wink. He really does get weak by your eyes. “Stop that winking, my knees might shake.”
You snort in amusement, shaking your head. “Alright then, next question. Are you free to hold my hands more this weekend when we go out?”
“Oh, right, we’ll go out this weekend! We’re going to join Mingyu and Minghao at that Christmas art market, right?” You nod in response. Chan hums and answers, “Yes, of course. We’ll be going around the entire time! I can’t lose you there, so I really do need to hold your hands there.”
“You don’t even treat this as a game anymore, you’re just genuinely answering,” you hold his hands tighter in his pockets. Chan laughs and tells you, “Well, I’m still playing. My answers are still yes, after all!”
You can’t help but give in. These are questions that Chan wouldn’t banter about. That romantic.
“But you know, we can hold hands more tomorrow, the other day, and the next few days before we go out again, right?” Chan pouts at you.
Those pouting lips are too close to yours. Just a little more, and you might actually kiss him.
You sigh and purse your lips, shaking your head again. You think you’ll be shaking your head way too much as long as you’re playing the game. “Yes, are you that impatient?”
“Yes,” he tells you without any hesitation. Chan giggles and gives you a knowing look, “You just gave me a question, in case you missed it.”
You really can’t compete with this guy anymore, so you straightforwardly ask, “Are you also impatient for me to make us official?”
Chan gasps. Jaw dropped, and he warned you with a pointing hand after he pulled out his hand from his pocket. “Hey, that’s something serious. I’m not going to say yes to that mindlessly!”
You softly smile, pulling out your free hand to caress his face and pinch his cheek. “Say yes to that for the game. I’m not going to take that into heart.” Because you know he is the most patient person ever to exist. You wouldn’t need to ask him to be in a hurry because he will never mind waiting.
He pouts and sulks. You notice his dropped shoulders, so you plead. “Hey, please, just for this game?”
Chan returns his hand to yours in his pocket and groans, “Fine, yes. I’m impatient to make us official.”
Well, here we go.
“Well, that’s the end of our game.” You notice Chan's rapid appearance of confusion, “I’m not yet done asking you though. Answer me genuinely this time?”
You wait for Chan’s approval before you continue. When he finally nods, you continue. You slowly and gently ask him, “Would you still say yes if I want us to be for real now?”
You are greeted with a Chan who couldn’t speak. A Chan who has the highest heart rate right now. “Even though you’re not really impatient, I really like you so much for a while now, like you’ve got me wrapped around your finger already, and I would like you to stop courting me because everything’s too real now and—”
“Yes!” Chan ecstatically says to you. “Yes, yes, yes! You don’t even have to ask me. All I wanted was to have the answer come from you,” Chan cradles your face with both of his hands and brushes your cheeks with his thumbs. “Do you want us to be official? I want to hear it from you.”
You wholeheartedly say yes, and everything goes crazy for Chan. As a dramatic guy, the first thing he does is drop to the floor, cover his face, and scream. His hands covering his face muffle the endless screams coming out of his throat. You can’t help but facepalm over this guy.
And that’s the first thing you have to deal with Chan as your boyfriend now, apparently…
“Chan? Are-are you alright?” you amusingly ask Chan, who’s still on the ground.
Before Chan even answers, you hear the speakers say the countdown will start very soon, bringing Chan back to his feet.
You groan and dust off the dirt around him, already giving him a light scolding on carelessly rolling on something dirty. You fix his jacket, shaking off dirt near the collar, “I suddenly remember that you’re a very exaggerated kind of guy.”
“Who you love anyway?” Chan asks, grinning and waggling his eyebrows. You roll your eyes jokingly and nod, “Yes, yes. I should’ve remembered that.” Chan grins more in satisfaction.
During the whole time of dusting off Chan’s clothes, you didn’t notice everyone was already counting down. You only became aware of the remaining ten seconds after your little bubble popped.
Ten, nine.
“The waiting was so worth it, _____. I love you so much, I’m not gonna stop saying that.”
Eight, seven.
“Love you, Chan.”
Six, five.
“Merry Christmas, Chan?” you glance at him with a warm smile.
Four, three.
“Merry Christmas, ______. I love you.”
Two, one.
Everyone greets in unison, “Merry Christmas!”
“_____! No way,” Chan pouts at you, looking like he’s almost gonna cry.
You have no idea how adorable Chan is with all of the open lights from everywhere exposing him. Fluster really takes over him when you kiss him anywhere, this time on his lips right after everything lights up. You can clearly see his ears turning red.
“Do you want me to greet you again?” You quickly close the gap between you to peck his lips. “Merry Christmas, Chan.”
“_____, I swear, you gotta let me hold on to you if you’re gonna do that!” Chan lightly stomps and shyly laughs, “The kisses are making me weak!”
You smile and sigh contentedly, “We really can’t deny that you’re dramatic, are you?”
He can’t help but swoon at those eyes of yours once again. They have shined brighter than earlier, complementing your curled lips. He believes that an unexpected wish came true just now.
Christmas songs start blaring at the speakers, effortlessly making everyone sing along.
Chan knows how you unironically enjoy Christmas songs—specifically Mariah Carey’s All I Want for Christmas is You, which never failed to replenish your energy. He snakes his arm to your waist and pulls you beside him. He bumps you with his hips and sweetly sings to you. His bashful smile seems to lure you into joining along, bumping back with your hips, making you sway to the rhythm of the song instead. You lightheartedly laugh and continue to sing together amusingly, your hips swaying without caring if you’re out of tune or your voice cracking very badly. During the entire song, both of you just look like kids fooling around adorably.
“All I want for Christmas is you, baby!” you sing the final line to each other.
The echoing voice of Seungkwan is the first thing you hear as you arrive at the reserved room. “Ugh, the latest edition of DPL’s love birds is here!”
You and Chan entered with your hands intertwined together. Your other hand was empty as Chan willingly brought your paper bags with gifts with his empty hand instead. Both of you rushed to a nearby convenience store to buy paper bags for your gifts earlier.
Chuckling at Seungkwan’s reaction, you find it strangely endearing. You reach for one of the three paper bags in Chan’s grasp. You step closer to him, greeting him with a teasing smile, “Merry Christmas, Kwan. I have a small gift for you.”
You hand him a personalized keyring you ordered online. It is made of clay, with a small doll-like face resembling Seungkwan’s features and his name in orange. You also have keyrings for some of your close friends in Chan’s circle, which you’ll also distribute later.
Seungkwan’s eyes widened in shock, and his hands moved to cover his open mouth. “No way, _____. Are you serious?” Dokyeom and Mingyu behind him snort loudly and fall down to their knees together. This guy is so dramatic! It’s almost like this trait runs in the blood of many of the guys here.
You can’t even utter a word right away because of how hilarious Seungkwan’s abrupt change in reaction was. You nod fervently as you laugh away and shortly answer, “Yes, I’m serious!”
Seungkwan couldn’t help but embrace you and thank you many times before he quickly let you go. Seungkwan’s eyes lead to somewhere else, and you follow the direction—apparently to Chan. Seungkwan glances back at you, sneering, “Chan might kill me if I hug you way too long.”
“Hey, I’m okay with friends hugging _____!” With Chan’s hand on his chest, the poor, offended guy attacks Seungkwan with a pointing hand, “You’re bitter that you didn’t bring anyone today!”
Seungkwan raises his fists and shushes Chan. “You punk, you have no idea what’s going on with my life right now!”
Chan stares at him blankly and tilts his head, placing his hands on his hips. Before he questions anything else, you grab his arm and drag him somewhere else, almost dying because of laughter.
You tilt your head and head to Chan with a pout, handing him a cup of soda that Soonyoung handed to you earlier. “Let’s not dig into that any deeper,” you delicately pat down the back of his shoulder as he takes a sip, silently asking him to simmer down, “accompany me giving the keyrings instead? I’ll leave right after this.”
Chan wipes the corner of his lips with his Christmas sweater that matches with yours. “You can stay, you know? They will also insist you to stay,” Chan tries to convince you, stroking your waist. “The decision is still up to you, of course. I’m not forcing you.”
You shake your head, stepping back, “No, it’s your time with your friends. I don’t want to meddle with your shenanigans.” You exasperatedly sigh, “I had enough of those guys during the DPL Christmas party last week. Their energies completely swallowed my soul.”
Chan chuckles and nods, “Alright, that’s completely understandable.”
He lets you lead the way with your hand still on his arm, pulling him almost everywhere in the room, distributing the keyrings, and hastily catching up with every one of them. He feels like a chaperon of some sort, but your glass-full excitement and energy make up for it. You pull him into every conversation, but he stays where he is more comfortable—giving you the spotlight instead.
He feels his phone vibrate in his pocket.
Vernon: Dude, you’re so quiet, but you’ve been staring at _____ the entire time they talk to everyone.
Vernon: You’re so down, dude. It’s too obvious with your face.
Has he been staring at you as you move around the room from one place to another? He couldn’t tell since all he thought about was how everything felt like a dream. Ever since the Christmas tree lighting, there has been this floaty feeling within him.
Yes, this affection was crossing the line of courtship before all of this, but he felt more comfortable, free, and open to you when things became real. No wonder why his gaze has been dreamily following you the entire time while smiling softly to himself.
Chan feels your hand softly pulling his hand, which brings him back to reality.
Both of you end up at the door. “Seems like everyone’s here already. Now you go, enjoy your Christmas with your friends!” you playfully shoo him away.
Chan giggles and gives in. He knows he’d lose either way, which is completely fine with him. He’d rather see you happy anyway. Pulling out his wallet, he pulls out a few bills, “Here, for your hot chocolate for your special alone time. Also, for compensation for still dealing with the boys earlier.”
“Hey, I can pay for my own drink. Keep that to yourself,” you gently push his hand back to himself. “I’ll be fine, don’t overthink everything. It’s nice to see the boys once again before we all go on a holiday break.”
Even with the chilly weather, he can’t deny that your sweet smile could melt everything away, even his heart. Sighing, he returns his money to your wallet, “If you say so.” He pulls you into a hug and pecks your forehead. Rocking you back and forth with you in his arms, he says, “Have fun at the cafe. Tell me what happens in the book you’ll be reading later!”
You really do need quite a break after consistent meetups and Christmas parties this Christmas after finals week ended. It wasn’t much of an excuse for Chan because he does know you’ve planned this way back already—“After all of these schedules, I’ll be drinking hot chocolate and peacefully reading at a lovely cafe. I deserve it!”
“See you later?” Chan asks for confirmation.
“Yes, we’ll have dinner after whatever all of this is over, alright?” You press your lips against his, delicately stroking his cheek. “I’ll see you later.”
Chan lightly pushes your hand away right when he sees it reach for the doorknob. With a snort, he lightheartedly nags, “I love you, but I told you, I’ll always open and close the door for you! Let me do everything, all you have to do is record my total residency hours honestly!”
“Can we open the door for you guys to flirt around outside?”
“Shut the fuck up, Seungkwan!”
You hurry off outside, hushing an I love you to Chan, which he returns wholeheartedly. When the door’s finally closed, the door opens once again, with you peeking. You catch up before you completely advance to the nearby cafe, “Love you too, Seungkwan! I’m so sorry!”
After you close the door, Seungkwan gasps. He panickly tries to shout for you to hear outside, “_____, I love you!” he quickly looks over at wide-eyed Chan, “Platonically! You’re my number one friend, not Chan!” Everyone laughs, including your laughter echoing outside, which is also heard inside their room.
hello, ig i need a formal announcement of some sort bc i know ppl wouldn't read my about me post that i edited a while ago....
i will be on indefinite hiatus in terms of writing for skz 🥲👍
honestly, since last year, i have become slightly detached to them. i still listen to them bc their stuff are still good (i still religiously listen to chk chk boom lmao never moved on from it ig) but yeah, i no longer have that energy and inspiration to write skz fics and i'm not as updated about skz as before. the feeling just naturally lessened for me, and i've been happy stanning other groups as well.
so for the meantime, i will not write skz fics. but who knows? i might post a drabble or two in the future! but again, i will not write for skz for the meantime. i hope that's understandable 😅 i also tried working on my skz wips but i barely get any progress. even if i try to force myself, i'd make nothing at the end.
i believe i have written a lot of skz fics in the last couple of years. i have have been writing for skz since 2021 at @starlighthan. so if you're new here, i have many (older) fics there for you to read more! <3
so yeah.... i hope this is understandable! feel free to still talk to me about skz! i honestly hope i'd have that inspiration to write for skz again soon, this almost feels like a burnout of some sort lmao 🫠
sigh... in the middle of my hiatus, i'd like to say that i will not write for skz anymore 🥹👍 i'm so sorry
i don't see myself writing for them anymore and i've grown out of the boys too. i still go back to their music once in a while but ofc the feeling write for them is no longer there!
idk if i'll be continue in writing either (esp for svt) since i'm on my final year and i have started my thesis already but let's see! i have a fic idea for the first time in so long and i hope that i get to write even just a little bit to get that idea out of my head lmao
hello... coming back here to say that i'll be on indefinite hiatus 🥲 lots of things going on and i haven't feel like writing so i'll temporarily put a stop into writing!
will not completely let go of writing of course! just really busy and currently handling many things in my life 👍
would still be online and would still read fics here! feel free to interact, message, or ask regardless! 🫡
featuring: guardians!gyucheol and guardians!doremiz
genre/au: fluff, angst, comfort, fantasy, friends to ???, final fantasy x au, apocalypse au, some pining
warnings: mentions of death, religious themes (also mentions that reader has many piercings)
word count: 4.5k words
synopsis: after encountering each other in your own pilgrimages, you finally had the downtime to sit down, worry about the future, talk, and quickly negotiate with your fellow summoner.
tag list: @planetkiimchi @reiofsuns2001 (join my tag list here!)
note: has anyone made a kpop ffx au? idk, but im doing it bc i've been playing ffx once in a few weeks and i can't get it out of my head,,, i love this game LMAO but yeah this could be loosely based on ffx since i have some stuff there that may be different or inaccurate. writing a ffx au has been something i wanted to do but i thought of digging deeper into the game before i even try to write one, so yes. here it is. enjoy <3 (so i'm at macalania rn lmao i think i've gone far into the game already lol)
another note: i think anyone can read this even if you don't know ffx—the fic has typical fantasy elements (magic, creatures, unconventional clothing?, unique terms) that i still tried to explain!
“Do we progress through our pilgrimage at the same time, Joshua?”
What exactly happened? You just stepped foot into the temple at Djose and were greeted by Lord Joshua again.
The male summoner respectfully bows his head and responds, “Maybe. It seems like it, fellow summoner.”
The pilgrimage doesn’t necessarily need to be done separately by summoners. Many summoners do encounter other summoners along their journey. Only the part where they search and pray with the fayth and get an aeon—the fayth’s physical form—in the Chamber of the Fayth in the temple is where there should only be one summoner. This just seems to be too much of a coincidence, as you’ve seen each other in almost every part of Spira you’ve been in so far.
You gently pull him back up through a touch to his arm. “I’m not judging you for getting into coincidences with me like this,” you laugh under your breath, “and I simply just find this whole thing very interesting, seeing you and your guardians as usual.”
The guardians of Lord Joshua, Seungcheol and Mingyu, quickly bow down to you as a greeting, along with your own, Seungkwan, Vernon, and Chan, to the summoner across you.
Joshua smiles sweetly and wonders, “When did we last see each other?” he continuously indulges in your fascination, “At Luca, am I right?”
You eagerly nod, appreciating his accurate recall. “Correct. I told you we appreciated your presence and support in the blitzball game before we left for Mi’ihen. Seungkwan is from Besaid and is part of Besaid Aurochs after all.”
Seungkwan, despite being naturally skilled at blitzball, a sport favored by almost everyone in Spira, was the only one standing in for the winning cup. He was overpowered by his teammates, who were stuck with simply doing their best without going for the trophy. This kind of mentality made the team notoriously so far from reaching the title.
Only in that tournament did the entire Aurochs change their minds when they found out they got into the semifinals and were very close to becoming champions. Seungkwan was a pivotal key in pushing the entire team to win, with the unexpected small yet hard-to-ignore support from Lord Joshua and his guardians from the crowd. (There was a comically contrasting tone of support from your group and Joshua’s—with Chan’s intentionally irritating words of encouragement and Seungcheol’s booming shouts and cheers.)
“Of course, isn’t Seungkwan a great goalkeeper?” Joshua asks the two men behind him. The two guardians enthusiastically agree, making Seungkwan curl his lips and graciously thank them.
You hear Seungkwan gush at Vernon at the back, “I cannot believe this!”
“Absolutely. I believe there is a lack of recognition for him,” you look back to see him with a red face and his hands wrapped around Vernon’s arm, “and being from Besaid shouldn’t hinder such acknowledgment.”
“You should teach us how to goal keep some time. We suck at that,” Seungcheol says to Seungkwan. Mingyu grins and agrees, “We’re the worst.” He scratches his head, “Catching the ball is hard on water.”
You step aside to give your own guardian—also a close friend of yours—the quick spotlight. “You know what to do if we are to return to Luca again!” Seungkwan beams at your comment.
Joshua felt his heart warming up more than several minutes ago when he saw your temple entrance. After going through the begrudging Cloister of Trials and exhausting praying at the Chamber of Fayth—which gave him Ixion, a powerful aeon in the presence of a gigantic long-horned horse embellished with gold around its neck and hooves—, you by the temple door were his first sight as he stepped out of the chamber. Still looking fresh and kind as ever, you unintentionally pulled the heartstrings of the summoner from Bevelle for the nth time. You were like the fresh breath of air from the suffocating yet fulfilling pressures of a summoner’s role.
Seungkwan glances at you and Joshua and says, “I hope we get to return to Luca again!” Everyone giggles and gushes over the endearing guardian. “We have to defeat Sin first before anything else, so blitzball isn’t my priority for now.”
Joshua admires the mindset of your guardian, softly nodding in agreement. “Which I believe is why we’re both here in a temple of Yevon,” Joshua continues. “This is not a race, but a collective mission of summoners and guardians, rather.”
You quickly add to the conversation. “You could recall a small number of how many summoners have successfully beaten Sin throughout history,” you see Chan counting on his hand. You purse your lips. “It is a concerning challenge for all of Spira. We all need to move quickly before the Sin eradicates more lands and kills more people.”
“This is not a competition on who can beat the force, especially the chances of living when you’re up against it has always been low,” you emphasize, “which is why we have to keep on going and hopefully wipe out Sin, even if that would take us years.”
Joshua realizes the heavy burden of being a summoner even more after you show your strong will to the pilgrimage and defeat Sin. He is well aware of how the end will go for every summoner and guardian, but he’d rather face what is coming close to him than worry about the sacrifices to be made at the end. It’s still a long way to the end, anyway.
In fact, he appreciates how unfazed you seem. He certainly knows that you’re aware as well of how this journey would end if you even reach it. Despite being a full-fledged summoner like you, he believes he might gain a new lesson or two from you. He needs to have a brave heart like yours.
Joshua widens his eyes in realization and clasps his hands together. “Oh, you’re here to pray and communicate with the fayth. Right, right! You guys must be in a rush—”
“Not really, Joshua. It’s alright,” you offer a comforting smile. “Since we arrived here a little late at night, I might go through the Cloister of Trials and Chamber of Fayth tomorrow morning instead.”
“We’ll be staying at the inn for now,” Vernon informs. “At least _____ will have enough energy for tomorrow's trials and chamber. They might be drained now after the long journey.”
Seungkwan chuckles. “_____ might collapse if they were to continue now after those battles with fiends on the way here.”
Joshua and his guardians jointly gasped so loudly. “What fiends have you encountered on the way here?” Mingyu asked.
“We didn’t meet any fiend on our way here, surprisingly,” Seungcheol carelessly realizes. Joshua then lightly smacks his arm, “Be understanding instead, Cheol.” Seungcheol sends his apologies to him, especially to you, after that.
You wave off with your hand to Seungcheol and answer Mingyu’s question, leaning to the white staff on your hand. “Several of them. A sinspawn, several Bombs—those annoyingly fiery creatures that almost blasted in front of us, if you know—and too many of the Elementals,” you grimaced as you recalled everything. “Mostly the White Element for the Elementals, for sure.”
You were left with the summoner and his guardians’ jaws dropped. Vernon snickers at their reactions, folds his arms, and asks, “They look too clean after all of those battles, right?”
Oh, he really had to do that to brag you? You raise your brow to Vernon and shake your head.
“Yeah, for sure,” Mingyu promptly answers. Seungcheol adds in and says, “Thought you traveled from the Highroads to Djose peacefully even.”
Joshua slowly steps closer to you and eyes at your clothes. You are clothed in a dandelion kimono-style top with draped sleeves resembling white clouds around your wrists. The bottom of the silky top has a long strip that wraps around your waist, also securely tied as a ribbon at your back. You also have very loose and light white bottoms, flowing with the wind very easily with minimal movement. There was a comfortable touch in your outfit with your brown sandals as well.
“You impressively do look flawless after a long day,” Joshua softly tells you. He then notices more details about you. You are subtly embellished with shine, especially around your ears and neck. All the hoops and studs on your ears, a thin silver chain necklace, and the small glittered four-pointed stars around your collar shimmer as strikingly as your eyes, adding more to the radiant presence of yours. “Still looking as great as the last time I saw you.”
You smile in gratitude and thank him. “Thanks, you don’t even look like you just finished the trials and praying to the fayth all day. Those are taxing, for sure,” you also went for a look at Lord Joshua.
The male summoner is adorned with a long navy blue velvet coat, a black patterned white shirt, and khaki belted pants that are loosely laced up at the flares. The anklet on his right leg is visible from the flares, beaded with shells and stones on top of his chunky black boots. He, too, has several piercings on his ears, complementing the bangles on his wrists and silver staff on his hand. The streaks of red on his long hair reflect under the sun, making him look as majestic as ever.
His whole outfit screams like an experienced adventurer and warrior. It is no surprise, as he got to travel around the entirety of Spira while being an apprentice summoner. There is this gentleness and elegance in his entirety, undeniably making people mistake him as royalty of a different land countless times.
You timidly nod and step back, confirming and standing up to your heart's thoughts. You look breathtaking—untouchable even.
The guardians obviously sense something between you two. It takes a knowing eye contact between Seungkwan and Mingyu before they even make a move.
“I believe Lord Joshua also needs the rest for the day,” Mingyu gently pulls Joshua and bows down to your presence. “He also has a whole day ahead of him.”
Seungkwan steps closer to you and pushes you to the door, “And so do you, _____! You better wash up and go to bed soon!” Your two other guardians greet the lord and his guardians before Seungkwan drags you further away.
“You didn’t go to bed as what your guardian said,” Joshua chuckles.
You fend for yourself, raising your hands, “I couldn’t sleep, and I just found you waiting by the inn's lobby.” Joshua looks and discovers your revealed wrist knives after your flowy sleeves slid downwards to your elbows.
Joshua retorts, “I’ve always thought you’re the go-with-the-flow type, how everything seems to be easy for you like sleeping. Seungkwan seems to nag you a lot if you deviate.”
You pull your sleeves up to your shoulders and grab a rock to throw at the body of water in front of you. “I am kinda like that. Although there are times when you must be hard-headed and move against the current,” you hand Joshua a different rock, “like how I had to summon an aeon to beat a sinspawn. All four of us struggled to beat the sinspawn. I can’t pray and heal all of us every time we get huge attacks. Ifrit was my answer to my problem, especially since sinspawn’s biggest weakness is fire.”
“Because Ifrit’s element is fire,” Joshua murmurs and throws the rock you handed him. “Makes sense. It’s a great countermove if you have almost nothing left in you.”
“Exactly!”
Joshua jumps at your exclaim, making him chuckle once again and scratch his head. “Don’t tell me Seungkwan told you not to summon an aeon?”
You smirk and stand up. “I’m not gonna tell you then.” You move closer to the shore, “Summoning an aeon is part of our job description, but I try my best not to exhaust all of my aeons since we can survive most battles—there are four of us! But that sinspawn came by after too many battles with fiends along the way, so we were kind of done when it came to that. I had to summon one.”
Joshua nods in understanding and follows you. He ends up removing his boots as his feet are too close to the water, only left with his anklet and his flared pants dipping into the water.
“Your journey sounds quite thrilling though. This may be a pilgrimage, but it is also almost like a test of survival,” Joshua stands tall beside you, basking into the moonlight and deeply breathing in the oxygen. He breathes out and uncomfortably tells you, shooting his hands to his pockets, “It—it really is a challenge, _____. The battles get absolutely exhausting. But if your instincts warn you beforehand, it is best to depend on it and take measures.”
“Also, your weapons won’t completely save you from a huge sinspawn, especially Sin,” Joshua jokes, making you shake your head and look at the concealed wrist knives under your sleeves. “That’s the point of all the training we went through to be here. For the summoning and all.”
“But you know, being well-versed with any weapon other than the staff is a huge advantage already,” you pointed out. “At least you have something else, especially for fiends intolerable to spells.”
That showed the independence you hold, regardless if you have three guardians on your tail. “As you said, it’s survival. These guardians sacrificed their time to protect us and our journey to defeating Sin. Learning what they can do can help me attain their goal if there’s a time when we’re no longer complete.”
You raise your head to view the vast oceans. You say under your breath, “Like us, they will have their end to their fate that we wouldn’t expect.”
An uncomfortable silence flowed with the air brushing your clothing. There was this unsettling feeling bubbling within yourselves on the inevitable.
Joshua presses his lips into a thin line. You say with a trembling voice, “We’ve done the sending many times already, and I don’t want to do that countless more times soon.”
The sending—the ceremony of guiding the dead’s spirits to the Farplane—has been a sorrowful yet hopeful aid to the people a summoner could give. Every time Sin destroys a wide land filled with many lives, you always perform a sending to give assurance to the living that the souls of the dead are brought and taken care of at the Farplane.
Joshua softly asks to nowhere, “Sin, what have you done?” With a heavy sigh, he sits back down on the stones and rocks his feet in anxiousness. He feels his feet get cold by the water swishing back and forth in front of him.
“It has made us braver.” He looks up at the view of you playing with your sleeves. “Come to think of it, we’re cowards to some extent, but we wouldn’t have reached this far without the will not to back out,” you look back at him. “It’s like how I would love to say no to the question, “Ride ze shoopuf?” but I would never say that with my full chest because I have to keep going.”
Joshua tries to hide his laugh. “You don’t want to ride ze shoopuf?”
You glare at him, observing his behavior well enough to say that he finds it funny without knowing the context. “I fell once from a shoopuf, okay? Falling down from that large of a shoopuf was terrifying!”
“Tell me, the shoopuf also saved you, right?” Joshua asks you with a knowing look. “They’re nice enough to pick you up with their trunks.”
And he’s right. You didn’t even have to answer him. The elephant creatures do have soft hearts to pick anyone up from the water. Maybe the feeling of falling down made you dread to ride a shoopuf again.
“Shut up,” you roll your eyes. Joshua finally laughs out loud, which makes you exhale heavily in annoyance.
You scoop water from the shore and let it flow down to his head from your hand. “We have to ride a shoopuf to Moonflow after my trials and prayers at the Djose Temple, and this is also something I have to prepare!”
Shaking his head to get the water out of his face, Joshua laughs louder than ever, considerably loud enough to wake fiends nearby if there’s any.
You huff, completely forgetting about the nature of Lord Joshua when he’s not on the job. “We just meet each other frequently without conversing like this. It’s been a while since you laughed hard because of my misery,” you give him a forced smile.
“It’s been a while since I visited Besaid,” he smiles as memories resurface. “Besaid was wonderful.”
Joshua holds strong memories of his short break at Besaid. He mainly went there to visit a high summoner at your temple, but he got to extend his stay for several days to take in and admire the island.
That extension of several days featured you, of course, who took him around the island, especially the beach and valley. You knew so well that he’d enjoy views like those.
“It’s also been a while for me since I left Besaid,” you finally sit back down beside him. “This homesickness is hitting me every inn we stop at. What is left here with me from Besaid are my guardians and my weapons.”
Joshua tilts his head and asks, “Have you ever thought of stopping the pilgrimage and going back home to Besaid? Many, if not most, summoners stop their pilgrimages even if they’ve come far.”
“I miss home, but I’d rather come back to Besaid when I’m sure that Sin is gone,” you look back at him, melancholy reflecting through your eyes. You rhetorically ask, “Don’t you think it’s a waste of time to go through months of traveling, praying, and battling if you eventually stop stepping closer to the goal? Doing all of this is a privilege of a summoner already.”
Those are words Joshua expected. You’ve repeatedly held up this persistence to the end of Sin like a broken record. Joshua sensed that you seem to never look back and continuously move forward.
For him, he had tried to step backward many times, but his own guardians often pushed him forward and brought him back to his senses. He has always felt the presence of cowardice within him, and it takes over him in a spur.
He is brave, just like you, but he can’t seem to let it set in his mind like how you do it. Maybe he just needed this pep talk with you. He has listened so much to your words, especially to the answers to his questions, and it undeniably made him want to stand up taller than he is.
“The pilgrimage made me want to cry many times,” Joshua earnestly shares. “No, it made me cry several times already,” he corrects and laughs at himself, “but being a summoner is a blessing not everyone has. It’s made out of hard work, faith, and sincerity. We’re here to bring the Calm, and it’s the only thing I’ve been holding on to to not completely surrender.”
“Say, would you like to go through the pilgrimage with me?” he wholeheartedly asks. “It may be unconventional for two summoners to go through a pilgrimage together, but at least we could raise the chances of finally coming home and returning the Calm?”
With offers like this, you sometimes consult with your guardians first, especially Vernon. You got several offers of marriages throughout your pilgrimage, and you instantly rejected them without hearing the guardians’ opinions because you know each other. They have enough trust in you to make decisions, despite their main role to guide you. They understand you as well—always understanding where you’re coming from.
You can’t help but smile. “Do you even have the patience to wait another whole day before we leave together for Moonflow?”
“A day is not too long for me, _____. Don’t worry,” he gently pats your head. “I’ll still be here after everything, promise.”
“You ready?” Seungkwan worriedly asks you, looking all over you to ensure you’re ready. “I know we’ll go through the trials together, but I just want to know if you’re… alright?”
You lift your eyebrow while tilting your head. You confusingly answer him, “Why yes, Kwan… I think I should be the one asking you that.”
Chan groans. “We’re with _____ for the trials. Stop babying our summoner!” Chan fusses and shakes Seungkwan, leaving you snorting and facing back to ask Vernon with an uncontrolled smile, “Haven’t we done the trials several times already?”
Vernon shrugs and tells you, “Yeah, but the trials in every temple are different from each other.” He looks at Seungkwan behind you and nonchalantly adds, “We’ll be fine either way. We have each other here.”
On the other hand, Joshua gets nagged by his own guardians for not communicating with them about something else. “Just tell us you like _____!” Mingyu lightly hits Joshua with his bamboo fan, “There is no problem with adventuring with them. Just be less of a coward and confess to them—”
Joshua calmly exhales and holds on to his staff tighter, “I do not like _____ that way—”
Seungcheol cocks his head and smirks. “Oh, stop there! It’s too obvious, Shua!” He points a finger at the summoner, “You are willing to wait another day for them. That’s enough evidence!”
Joshua feels something funny on his leg and looks behind. The lower tip of your staff at Chan’s hand gave him a small tickle.
“Give your final words to our summoner,” Chan bluffs, leaning on your tall weapon with his other hand on his hip. “We’ll be leaving for the trials in a while.”
“You let yourself loose with them very quickly that way,” Seungkwan behind him mutters, “they’re obviously older than you.”
Chan huffs and looks at him, “Can’t I take my role seriously?”
“Being a guardian doesn’t require you to be very serious, Chan,” Joshua sweetly says to the young guardian. “These two love to make fun of me,” he says with a pointing hand towards his two guardians behind him.
He hears you call for Chan and ask for your staff. Chan widens his eyes and steps closer to Joshua, handing your staff to his free hand. “Lord Joshua, you’re just in time. You know what to do,” the guardian hushes to him. “Give it to them and say your vow or something.”
“Your vow,” Mingyu muffledly says with his hand covering his mouth, holding in his laugh. He quietly tells Seungcheol beside him, “I like this guy already.”
Joshua blankly stares at your staff for a couple of seconds before he fixes his posture and walks to where you’re standing—at the end of the ascending stairs to the door to the Cloister of Trials.
Vernon in front of you stops your rambling to him about the complex probability of any fayth hearing your prayers for Sin’s defeat and turns your body to the back. You’re immediately faced in front of the lord, and you confusingly look at him and your staff on his hand back and forth.
Before you even ask, Joshua bashfully answers your question, “Chan told me to give it to you.”
You see Chan, Seungkwan, and Joshua’s guardians silently cheer for you behind Joshua across the other side of the temple. You roll your eyes and chuckle.
You reach for the staff on his hand and thank him. “Well, I’ll be gone for a while. I hope you stand by the words you told me last night at the bottom of the Djose Highroad.”
Joshua eagerly nods. “Of course, I had to book another night at the inn earlier,” he remembers as he felt his pockets a little lighter than before, “I had to pay a few more gils for that.”
Scoffing, you chide, “I should’ve paid! We also have extra coins, and paying must be a nuisance because of your compliance with my agenda today.” You ask Vernon to pull out your pouch of gils. “We’ll pay you back, just so we’re even.”
Joshua hides his hands in his pockets. “Nope, I’m not taking that. I’m the one who offered the joint pilgrimage.” He confidently smiles at you, obviously that fighting back wouldn’t affect him.
You wave your hand to Vernon to keep the pouch again. Frowning, you immediately give in. “Fine, but that’s for now. I’ll pay you back next time.”
Joshua shakes his head. “No need to,” Joshua warmly smiles, “your presence is highly regarded already.”
“Says a fellow summoner,” you quickly reply, making him laugh softly. You brush your clothes and tell, “I believe I have to get going.”
“Oh.” Joshua nods, “Of course. Good luck, _____.” The redhead teases, “I’m not going to spoil anything for you.”
Intentionally darting your eyes anywhere else but Joshua, you say, “Yeah, sure. We can do it on our own. Right, Vernon?”
Vernon, behind you, quickly salutes and confirms, “Absolutely. The trials are always a no-brainer for _____!”
Vernon and Joshua erupt in laughter while you groan at your guardian. “The trials are a collective effort, Vernon!”
Joshua notices that your guardians seem to look up to you a lot, which is unquestionably evident in how they treat you, other than being your best friends. You seem to have a solid family, something that Joshua could relate to when it comes to his sibling-like guardians.
Joshua clicks his tongue and exhales. “Really, _____. Good luck, I know you guys can do it,” he reaches for your hand and strokes the back of it, “I’ll still be here, waiting. You don’t have to think about me leaving or disappearing.”
Moved by his care and affection, you heartfully thank him for his patience and reassurance. To lighten the mood even more, you jokingly ask, “Help me with the shoopuf thing after this?”
The summoner clad in blue sheepishly shakes his head. “Of course, I’ll also still be here to help you with the shoopuf,” he smiles in endearment and scratches his head.
Vernon calls the rest of your guardians and gathers at the first few steps of the stairs. On the other hand, you give your goodbyes to the other summoner your heart seems to can’t get rid of.
“Goodbye?” you unsurely greet Joshua, “We’ll definitely see each other at the end of the day or tomorrow, anyway.”
You’re not sure whether to let go of Joshua’s hand on yours or not when his soft hands have been warming up both yours and your heart.
“No goodbyes, just good luck,” Joshua finally lets go of your hands, “I’ll definitely see you very soon. We still have a long road ahead of us.”
You nod and step back, hiding your smile on your way to your guardians at the steps. “Bring it on.”
featuring: guardians!gyucheol and guardians!doremiz (i hope u see my vision /j)
genre/au: fluff, angst, comfort, fantasy, friends to ??? (i can't tell honestly), final fantasy x au, apocalypse au, some pining
warnings: mentions of death, religious themes (also mentions that reader has many piercings)
word count: 4.5k words
synopsis: after encountering each other in your own pilgrimages, you finally had the downtime to sit down, worry about the future, talk, and quickly negotiate with your fellow summoner.
tag list: @planetkiimchi @reiofsuns2001 (join my tag list here!)
note: has anyone made a kpop ffx au? idk, but im doing it bc i've been playing ffx once in a few weeks and i can't get it out of my head,,, i love this game LMAO but yeah this could be loosely based on ffx since i have some stuff there that may be different or inaccurate. writing a ffx au has been something i wanted to do but i thought of digging deeper into the game before i even try to write one, so yes. here it is. enjoy <3 (so i'm at macalania rn lmao i think i've gone far into the game already lol)
another note: i'm starting to notice that i write very efficiently with genres like this. maybe it's because i enjoy stuff like this... i started this yesterday with the expectation that i might write a drabble but here is surprisingly over 4k words of word dump with the ffx universe LMAO
“Do we progress through our pilgrimage at the same time, Joshua?”
What exactly happened? You just stepped foot into the temple at Djose and were greeted by Lord Joshua again.
The male summoner respectfully bows his head and responds, “Maybe. It seems like it, fellow summoner.”
The pilgrimage doesn’t necessarily need to be done separately by summoners. Many summoners do encounter other summoners along their journey. Only the part where they search and pray with the fayth and get an aeon—the fayth’s physical form—in the Chamber of the Fayth in the temple is where there should only be one summoner. This just seems to be too much of a coincidence, as you’ve seen each other in almost every part of Spira you’ve been in so far.
You gently pull him back up through a touch to his arm. “I’m not judging you for getting into coincidences with me like this,” you laugh under your breath, “and I simply just find this whole thing very interesting, seeing you and your guardians as usual.”
The guardians of Lord Joshua, Seungcheol and Mingyu, quickly bow down to you as a greeting, along with your own, Seungkwan, Vernon, and Chan, to the summoner across you.
Joshua smiles sweetly and wonders, “When did we last see each other?” he continuously indulges in your fascination, “At Luca, am I right?”
You eagerly nod, appreciating his accurate recall. “Correct. I told you we appreciated your presence and support in the blitzball game before we left for Mi’ihen. Seungkwan is from Besaid and is part of Besaid Aurochs after all.”
Seungkwan, despite being naturally skilled at blitzball, a sport favored by almost everyone in Spira, was the only one standing in for the winning cup. He was overpowered by his teammates, who were stuck with simply doing their best without going for the trophy. This kind of mentality made the team notoriously so far from reaching the title.
Only in that tournament did the entire Aurochs change their minds when they found out they got into the semifinals and were very close to becoming champions. Seungkwan was a pivotal key in pushing the entire team to win, with the unexpected small yet hard-to-ignore support from Lord Joshua and his guardians from the crowd. (There was a comically contrasting tone of support from your group and Joshua’s—with Chan’s intentionally irritating words of encouragement and Seungcheol’s booming shouts and cheers.)
“Of course, isn’t Seungkwan a great goalkeeper?” Joshua asks the two men behind him. The two guardians enthusiastically agree, making Seungkwan curl his lips and graciously thank them.
You hear Seungkwan gush at Vernon at the back, “I cannot believe this!”
“Absolutely. I believe there is a lack of recognition for him,” you look back to see him with a red face and his hands wrapped around Vernon’s arm, “and being from Besaid shouldn’t hinder such acknowledgment.”
“You should teach us how to goal keep some time. We suck at that,” Seungcheol says to Seungkwan. Mingyu grins and agrees, “We’re the worst.” He scratches his head, “Catching the ball is hard on water.”
You step aside to give your own guardian—also a close friend of yours—the quick spotlight. “You know what to do if we are to return to Luca again!” Seungkwan beams at your comment.
Joshua felt his heart warming up more than several minutes ago when he saw your temple entrance. After going through the begrudging Cloister of Trials and exhausting praying at the Chamber of Fayth—which gave him Ixion, a powerful aeon in the presence of a gigantic long-horned horse embellished with gold around its neck and hooves—, you by the temple door were his first sight as he stepped out of the chamber. Still looking fresh and kind as ever, you unintentionally pulled the heartstrings of the summoner from Bevelle for the nth time. You were like the fresh breath of air from the suffocating yet fulfilling pressures of a summoner’s role.
Seungkwan glances at you and Joshua and says, “I hope we get to return to Luca again!” Everyone giggles and gushes over the endearing guardian. “We have to defeat Sin first before anything else, so blitzball isn’t my priority for now.”
Joshua admires the mindset of your guardian, softly nodding in agreement. “Which I believe is why we’re both here in a temple of Yevon,” Joshua continues. “This is not a race, but a collective mission of summoners and guardians, rather.”
You quickly add to the conversation. “You could recall a small number of how many summoners have successfully beaten Sin throughout history,” you see Chan counting on his hand. You purse your lips. “It is a concerning challenge for all of Spira. We all need to move quickly before the Sin eradicates more lands and kills more people.”
“This is not a competition on who can beat the force, especially the chances of living when you’re up against it has always been low,” you emphasize, “which is why we have to keep on going and hopefully wipe out Sin, even if that would take us years.”
Joshua realizes the heavy burden of being a summoner even more after you show your strong will to the pilgrimage and defeat Sin. He is well aware of how the end will go for every summoner and guardian, but he’d rather face what is coming close to him than worry about the sacrifices to be made at the end. It’s still a long way to the end, anyway.
In fact, he appreciates how unfazed you seem. He certainly knows that you’re aware as well of how this journey would end if you even reach it. Despite being a full-fledged summoner like you, he believes he might gain a new lesson or two from you. He needs to have a brave heart like yours.
Joshua widens his eyes in realization and clasps his hands together. “Oh, you’re here to pray and communicate with the fayth. Right, right! You guys must be in a rush—”
“Not really, Joshua. It’s alright,” you offer a comforting smile. “Since we arrived here a little late at night, I might go through the Cloister of Trials and Chamber of Fayth tomorrow morning instead.”
“We’ll be staying at the inn for now,” Vernon informs. “At least _____ will have enough energy for tomorrow's trials and chamber. They might be drained now after the long journey.”
Seungkwan chuckles. “_____ might collapse if they were to continue now after those battles with fiends on the way here.”
Joshua and his guardians jointly gasped so loudly. “What fiends have you encountered on the way here?” Mingyu asked.
“We didn’t meet any fiend on our way here, surprisingly,” Seungcheol carelessly realizes. Joshua then lightly smacks his arm, “Be understanding instead, Cheol.” Seungcheol sends his apologies to him, especially to you, after that.
You wave off with your hand to Seungcheol and answer Mingyu’s question, leaning to the white staff on your hand. “Several of them. A sinspawn, several Bombs—those annoyingly fiery creatures that almost blasted in front of us, if you know—and too many of the Elementals,” you grimaced as you recalled everything. “Mostly the White Element for the Elementals, for sure.”
You were left with the summoner and his guardians’ jaws dropped. Vernon snickers at their reactions, folds his arms, and asks, “They look too clean after all of those battles, right?”
Oh, he really had to do that to brag you? You raise your brow to Vernon and shake your head.
“Yeah, for sure,” Mingyu promptly answers. Seungcheol adds in and says, “Thought you traveled from the Highroads to Djose peacefully even.”
Joshua slowly steps closer to you and eyes at your clothes. You are clothed in a dandelion kimono-style top with draped sleeves resembling white clouds around your wrists. The bottom of the silky top has a long strip that wraps around your waist, also securely tied as a ribbon at your back. You also have very loose and light white bottoms, flowing with the wind very easily with minimal movement. There was a comfortable touch in your outfit with your brown sandals as well.
“You impressively do look flawless after a long day,” Joshua softly tells you. He then notices more details about you. You are subtly embellished with shine, especially around your ears and neck. All the hoops and studs on your ears, a thin silver chain necklace, and the small glittered four-pointed stars around your collar shimmer as strikingly as your eyes, adding more to the radiant presence of yours. “Still looking as great as the last time I saw you.”
You smile in gratitude and thank him. “Thanks, you don’t even look like you just finished the trials and praying to the fayth all day. Those are taxing, for sure,” you also went for a look at Lord Joshua.
The male summoner is adorned with a long navy blue velvet coat, a black patterned white shirt, and khaki belted pants that are loosely laced up at the flares. The anklet on his right leg is visible from the flares, beaded with shells and stones on top of his chunky black boots. He, too, has several piercings on his ears, complementing the bangles on his wrists and silver staff on his hand. The streaks of red on his long hair reflect under the sun, making him look as majestic as ever.
His whole outfit screams like an experienced adventurer and warrior. It is no surprise, as he got to travel around the entirety of Spira while being an apprentice summoner. There is this gentleness and elegance in his entirety, undeniably making people mistake him as royalty of a different land countless times.
You timidly nod and step back, confirming and standing up to your heart's thoughts. You look breathtaking—untouchable even.
The guardians obviously sense something between you two. It takes a knowing eye contact between Seungkwan and Mingyu before they even make a move.
“I believe Lord Joshua also needs the rest for the day,” Mingyu gently pulls Joshua and bows down to your presence. “He also has a whole day ahead of him.”
Seungkwan steps closer to you and pushes you to the door, “And so do you, _____! You better wash up and go to bed soon!” Your two other guardians greet the lord and his guardians before Seungkwan drags you further away.
“You didn’t go to bed as what your guardian said,” Joshua chuckles.
You fend for yourself, raising your hands, “I couldn’t sleep, and I just found you waiting by the inn's lobby.” Joshua looks and discovers your revealed wrist knives after your flowy sleeves slid downwards to your elbows.
Joshua retorts, “I’ve always thought you’re the go-with-the-flow type, how everything seems to be easy for you like sleeping. Seungkwan seems to nag you a lot if you deviate.”
You pull your sleeves up to your shoulders and grab a rock to throw at the body of water in front of you. “I am kinda like that. Although there are times when you must be hard-headed and move against the current,” you hand Joshua a different rock, “like how I had to summon an aeon to beat a sinspawn. All four of us struggled to beat the sinspawn. I can’t pray and heal all of us every time we get huge attacks. Ifrit was my answer to my problem, especially since sinspawn’s biggest weakness is fire.”
“Because Ifrit’s element is fire,” Joshua murmurs and throws the rock you handed him. “Makes sense. It’s a great countermove if you have almost nothing left in you.”
“Exactly!”
Joshua jumps at your exclaim, making him chuckle once again and scratch his head. “Don’t tell me Seungkwan told you not to summon an aeon?”
You smirk and stand up. “I’m not gonna tell you then.” You move closer to the shore, “Summoning an aeon is part of our job description, but I try my best not to exhaust all of my aeons since we can survive most battles—there are four of us! But that sinspawn came by after too many battles with fiends along the way, so we were kind of done when it came to that. I had to summon one.”
Joshua nods in understanding and follows you. He ends up removing his boots as his feet are too close to the water, only left with his anklet and his flared pants dipping into the water.
“Your journey sounds quite thrilling though. This may be a pilgrimage, but it is also almost like a test of survival,” Joshua stands tall beside you, basking into the moonlight and deeply breathing in the oxygen. He breathes out and uncomfortably tells you, shooting his hands to his pockets, “It—it really is a challenge, _____. The battles get absolutely exhausting. But if your instincts warn you beforehand, it is best to depend on it and take measures.”
“Also, your weapons won’t completely save you from a huge sinspawn, especially Sin,” Joshua jokes, making you shake your head and look at the concealed wrist knives under your sleeves. “That’s the point of all the training we went through to be here. For the summoning and all.”
“But you know, being well-versed with any weapon other than the staff is a huge advantage already,” you pointed out. “At least you have something else, especially for fiends intolerable to spells.”
That showed the independence you hold, regardless if you have three guardians on your tail. “As you said, it’s survival. These guardians sacrificed their time to protect us and our journey to defeating Sin. Learning what they can do can help me attain their goal if there’s a time when we’re no longer complete.”
You raise your head to view the vast oceans. You say under your breath, “Like us, they will have their end to their fate that we wouldn’t expect.”
An uncomfortable silence flowed with the air brushing your clothing. There was this unsettling feeling bubbling within yourselves on the inevitable.
Joshua presses his lips into a thin line. You say with a trembling voice, “We’ve done the sending many times already, and I don’t want to do that countless more times soon.”
The sending—the ceremony of guiding the dead’s spirits to the Farplane—has been a sorrowful yet hopeful aid to the people a summoner could give. Every time Sin destroys a wide land filled with many lives, you always perform a sending to give assurance to the living that the souls of the dead are brought and taken care of at the Farplane.
Joshua softly asks to nowhere, “Sin, what have you done?” With a heavy sigh, he sits back down on the stones and rocks his feet in anxiousness. He feels his feet get cold by the water swishing back and forth in front of him.
“It has made us braver.” He looks up at the view of you playing with your sleeves. “Come to think of it, we’re cowards to some extent, but we wouldn’t have reached this far without the will not to back out,” you look back at him. “It’s like how I would love to say no to the question, “Ride ze shoopuf?” but I would never say that with my full chest because I have to keep going.”
Joshua tries to hide his laugh. “You don’t want to ride ze shoopuf?”
You glare at him, observing his behavior well enough to say that he finds it funny without knowing the context. “I fell once from a shoopuf, okay? Falling down from that large of a shoopuf was terrifying!”
“Tell me, the shoopuf also saved you, right?” Joshua asks you with a knowing look. “They’re nice enough to pick you up with their trunks.”
And he’s right. You didn’t even have to answer him. The elephant creatures do have soft hearts to pick anyone up from the water. Maybe the feeling of falling down made you dread to ride a shoopuf again.
“Shut up,” you roll your eyes. Joshua finally laughs out loud, which makes you exhale heavily in annoyance.
You scoop water from the shore and let it flow down to his head from your hand. “We have to ride a shoopuf to Moonflow after my trials and prayers at the Djose Temple, and this is also something I have to prepare!”
Shaking his head to get the water out of his face, Joshua laughs louder than ever, considerably loud enough to wake fiends nearby if there’s any.
You huff, completely forgetting about the nature of Lord Joshua when he’s not on the job. “We just meet each other frequently without conversing like this. It’s been a while since you laughed hard because of my misery,” you give him a forced smile.
“It’s been a while since I visited Besaid,” he smiles as memories resurface. “Besaid was wonderful.”
Joshua holds strong memories of his short break at Besaid. He mainly went there to visit a high summoner at your temple, but he got to extend his stay for several days to take in and admire the island.
That extension of several days featured you, of course, who took him around the island, especially the beach and valley. You knew so well that he’d enjoy views like those.
“It’s also been a while for me since I left Besaid,” you finally sit back down beside him. “This homesickness is hitting me every inn we stop at. What is left here with me from Besaid are my guardians and my weapons.”
Joshua tilts his head and asks, “Have you ever thought of stopping the pilgrimage and going back home to Besaid? Many, if not most, summoners stop their pilgrimages even if they’ve come far.”
“I miss home, but I’d rather come back to Besaid when I’m sure that Sin is gone,” you look back at him, melancholy reflecting through your eyes. You rhetorically ask, “Don’t you think it’s a waste of time to go through months of traveling, praying, and battling if you eventually stop stepping closer to the goal? Doing all of this is a privilege of a summoner already.”
Those are words Joshua expected. You’ve repeatedly held up this persistence to the end of Sin like a broken record. Joshua sensed that you seem to never look back and continuously move forward.
For him, he had tried to step backward many times, but his own guardians often pushed him forward and brought him back to his senses. He has always felt the presence of cowardice within him, and it takes over him in a spur.
He is brave, just like you, but he can’t seem to let it set in his mind like how you do it. Maybe he just needed this pep talk with you. He has listened so much to your words, especially to the answers to his questions, and it undeniably made him want to stand up taller than he is.
“The pilgrimage made me want to cry many times,” Joshua earnestly shares. “No, it made me cry several times already,” he corrects and laughs at himself, “but being a summoner is a blessing not everyone has. It’s made out of hard work, faith, and sincerity. We’re here to bring the Calm, and it’s the only thing I’ve been holding on to to not completely surrender.”
“Say, would you like to go through the pilgrimage with me?” he wholeheartedly asks. “It may be unconventional for two summoners to go through a pilgrimage together, but at least we could raise the chances of finally coming home and returning the Calm?”
With offers like this, you sometimes consult with your guardians first, especially Vernon. You got several offers of marriages throughout your pilgrimage, and you instantly rejected them without hearing the guardians’ opinions because you know each other. They have enough trust in you to make decisions, despite their main role to guide you. They understand you as well—always understanding where you’re coming from.
You can’t help but smile. “Do you even have the patience to wait another whole day before we leave together for Moonflow?”
“A day is not too long for me, _____. Don’t worry,” he gently pats your head. “I’ll still be here after everything, promise.”
“You ready?” Seungkwan worriedly asks you, looking all over you to ensure you’re ready. “I know we’ll go through the trials together, but I just want to know if you’re… alright?”
You lift your eyebrow while tilting your head. You confusingly answer him, “Why yes, Kwan… I think I should be the one asking you that.”
Chan groans. “We’re with _____ for the trials. Stop babying our summoner!” Chan fusses and shakes Seungkwan, leaving you snorting and facing back to ask Vernon with an uncontrolled smile, “Haven’t we done the trials several times already?”
Vernon shrugs and tells you, “Yeah, but the trials in every temple are different from each other.” He looks at Seungkwan behind you and nonchalantly adds, “We’ll be fine either way. We have each other here.”
On the other hand, Joshua gets nagged by his own guardians for not communicating with them about something else. “Just tell us you like _____!” Mingyu lightly hits Joshua with his bamboo fan, “There is no problem with adventuring with them. Just be less of a coward and confess to them—”
Joshua calmly exhales and holds on to his staff tighter, “I do not like _____ that way—”
Seungcheol cocks his head and smirks. “Oh, stop there! It’s too obvious, Shua!” He points a finger at the summoner, “You are willing to wait another day for them. That’s enough evidence!”
Joshua feels something funny on his leg and looks behind. The lower tip of your staff at Chan’s hand gave him a small tickle.
“Give your final words to our summoner,” Chan bluffs, leaning on your tall weapon with his other hand on his hip. “We’ll be leaving for the trials in a while.”
“You let yourself loose with them very quickly that way,” Seungkwan behind him mutters, “they’re obviously older than you.”
Chan huffs and looks at him, “Can’t I take my role seriously?”
“Being a guardian doesn’t require you to be very serious, Chan,” Joshua sweetly says to the young guardian. “These two love to make fun of me,” he says with a pointing hand towards his two guardians behind him.
He hears you call for Chan and ask for your staff. Chan widens his eyes and steps closer to Joshua, handing your staff to his free hand. “Lord Joshua, you’re just in time. You know what to do,” the guardian hushes to him. “Give it to them and say your vow or something.”
“Your vow,” Mingyu muffledly says with his hand covering his mouth, holding in his laugh. He quietly tells Seungcheol beside him, “I like this guy already.”
Joshua blankly stares at your staff for a couple of seconds before he fixes his posture and walks to where you’re standing—at the end of the ascending stairs to the door to the Cloister of Trials.
Vernon in front of you stops your rambling to him about the complex probability of any fayth hearing your prayers for Sin’s defeat and turns your body to the back. You’re immediately faced in front of the lord, and you confusingly look at him and your staff on his hand back and forth.
Before you even ask, Joshua bashfully answers your question, “Chan told me to give it to you.”
You see Chan, Seungkwan, and Joshua’s guardians silently cheer for you behind Joshua across the other side of the temple. You roll your eyes and chuckle.
You reach for the staff on his hand and thank him. “Well, I’ll be gone for a while. I hope you stand by the words you told me last night at the bottom of the Djose Highroad.”
Joshua eagerly nods. “Of course, I had to book another night at the inn earlier,” he remembers as he felt his pockets a little lighter than before, “I had to pay a few more gils for that.”
Scoffing, you chide, “I should’ve paid! We also have extra coins, and paying must be a nuisance because of your compliance with my agenda today.” You ask Vernon to pull out your pouch of gils. “We’ll pay you back, just so we’re even.”
Joshua hides his hands in his pockets. “Nope, I’m not taking that. I’m the one who offered the joint pilgrimage.” He confidently smiles at you, obviously that fighting back wouldn’t affect him.
You wave your hand to Vernon to keep the pouch again. Frowning, you immediately give in. “Fine, but that’s for now. I’ll pay you back next time.”
Joshua shakes his head. “No need to,” Joshua warmly smiles, “your presence is highly regarded already.”
“Says a fellow summoner,” you quickly reply, making him laugh softly. You brush your clothes and tell, “I believe I have to get going.”
“Oh.” Joshua nods, “Of course. Good luck, _____.” The redhead teases, “I’m not going to spoil anything for you.”
Intentionally darting your eyes anywhere else but Joshua, you say, “Yeah, sure. We can do it on our own. Right, Vernon?”
Vernon, behind you, quickly salutes and confirms, “Absolutely. The trials are always a no-brainer for _____!”
Vernon and Joshua erupt in laughter while you groan at your guardian. “The trials are a collective effort, Vernon!”
Joshua notices that your guardians seem to look up to you a lot, which is unquestionably evident in how they treat you, other than being your best friends. You seem to have a solid family, something that Joshua could relate to when it comes to his sibling-like guardians.
Joshua clicks his tongue and exhales. “Really, _____. Good luck, I know you guys can do it,” he reaches for your hand and strokes the back of it, “I’ll still be here, waiting. You don’t have to think about me leaving or disappearing.”
Moved by his care and affection, you heartfully thank him for his patience and reassurance. To lighten the mood even more, you jokingly ask, “Help me with the shoopuf thing after this?”
The summoner clad in blue sheepishly shakes his head. “Of course, I’ll also still be here to help you with the shoopuf,” he smiles in endearment and scratches his head.
Vernon calls the rest of your guardians and gathers at the first few steps of the stairs. On the other hand, you give your goodbyes to the other summoner your heart seems to can’t get rid of.
“Goodbye?” you unsurely greet Joshua, “We’ll definitely see each other at the end of the day or tomorrow, anyway.”
You’re not sure whether to let go of Joshua’s hand on yours or not when his soft hands have been warming up both yours and your heart.
“No goodbyes, just good luck,” Joshua finally lets go of your hands, “I’ll definitely see you very soon. We still have a long road ahead of us.”
You nod and step back, hiding your smile on your way to your guardians at the steps. “Bring it on.”
featuring: guardians!gyucheol and guardians!doremiz
genre/au: fluff, angst, comfort, fantasy, friends to ???, final fantasy x au, apocalypse au, some pining
warnings: mentions of death, religious themes (also mentions that reader has many piercings)
word count: 4.5k words
synopsis: after encountering each other in your own pilgrimages, you finally had the downtime to sit down, worry about the future, talk, and quickly negotiate with your fellow summoner.
tag list: @planetkiimchi @reiofsuns2001 (join my tag list here!)
note: has anyone made a kpop ffx au? idk, but im doing it bc i've been playing ffx once in a few weeks and i can't get it out of my head,,, i love this game LMAO but yeah this could be loosely based on ffx since i have some stuff there that may be different or inaccurate. writing a ffx au has been something i wanted to do but i thought of digging deeper into the game before i even try to write one, so yes. here it is. enjoy <3 (so i'm at macalania rn lmao i think i've gone far into the game already lol)
another note: i think anyone can read this even if you don't know ffx—the fic has typical fantasy elements (magic, creatures, unconventional clothing?, unique terms) that i still tried to explain!
“Do we progress through our pilgrimage at the same time, Joshua?”
What exactly happened? You just stepped foot into the temple at Djose and were greeted by Lord Joshua again.
The male summoner respectfully bows his head and responds, “Maybe. It seems like it, fellow summoner.”
The pilgrimage doesn’t necessarily need to be done separately by summoners. Many summoners do encounter other summoners along their journey. Only the part where they search and pray with the fayth and get an aeon—the fayth’s physical form—in the Chamber of the Fayth in the temple is where there should only be one summoner. This just seems to be too much of a coincidence, as you’ve seen each other in almost every part of Spira you’ve been in so far.
You gently pull him back up through a touch to his arm. “I’m not judging you for getting into coincidences with me like this,” you laugh under your breath, “and I simply just find this whole thing very interesting, seeing you and your guardians as usual.”
The guardians of Lord Joshua, Seungcheol and Mingyu, quickly bow down to you as a greeting, along with your own, Seungkwan, Vernon, and Chan, to the summoner across you.
Joshua smiles sweetly and wonders, “When did we last see each other?” he continuously indulges in your fascination, “At Luca, am I right?”
You eagerly nod, appreciating his accurate recall. “Correct. I told you we appreciated your presence and support in the blitzball game before we left for Mi’ihen. Seungkwan is from Besaid and is part of Besaid Aurochs after all.”
Seungkwan, despite being naturally skilled at blitzball, a sport favored by almost everyone in Spira, was the only one standing in for the winning cup. He was overpowered by his teammates, who were stuck with simply doing their best without going for the trophy. This kind of mentality made the team notoriously so far from reaching the title.
Only in that tournament did the entire Aurochs change their minds when they found out they got into the semifinals and were very close to becoming champions. Seungkwan was a pivotal key in pushing the entire team to win, with the unexpected small yet hard-to-ignore support from Lord Joshua and his guardians from the crowd. (There was a comically contrasting tone of support from your group and Joshua’s—with Chan’s intentionally irritating words of encouragement and Seungcheol’s booming shouts and cheers.)
“Of course, isn’t Seungkwan a great goalkeeper?” Joshua asks the two men behind him. The two guardians enthusiastically agree, making Seungkwan curl his lips and graciously thank them.
You hear Seungkwan gush at Vernon at the back, “I cannot believe this!”
“Absolutely. I believe there is a lack of recognition for him,” you look back to see him with a red face and his hands wrapped around Vernon’s arm, “and being from Besaid shouldn’t hinder such acknowledgment.”
“You should teach us how to goal keep some time. We suck at that,” Seungcheol says to Seungkwan. Mingyu grins and agrees, “We’re the worst.” He scratches his head, “Catching the ball is hard on water.”
You step aside to give your own guardian—also a close friend of yours—the quick spotlight. “You know what to do if we are to return to Luca again!” Seungkwan beams at your comment.
Joshua felt his heart warming up more than several minutes ago when he saw your temple entrance. After going through the begrudging Cloister of Trials and exhausting praying at the Chamber of Fayth—which gave him Ixion, a powerful aeon in the presence of a gigantic long-horned horse embellished with gold around its neck and hooves—, you by the temple door were his first sight as he stepped out of the chamber. Still looking fresh and kind as ever, you unintentionally pulled the heartstrings of the summoner from Bevelle for the nth time. You were like the fresh breath of air from the suffocating yet fulfilling pressures of a summoner’s role.
Seungkwan glances at you and Joshua and says, “I hope we get to return to Luca again!” Everyone giggles and gushes over the endearing guardian. “We have to defeat Sin first before anything else, so blitzball isn’t my priority for now.”
Joshua admires the mindset of your guardian, softly nodding in agreement. “Which I believe is why we’re both here in a temple of Yevon,” Joshua continues. “This is not a race, but a collective mission of summoners and guardians, rather.”
You quickly add to the conversation. “You could recall a small number of how many summoners have successfully beaten Sin throughout history,” you see Chan counting on his hand. You purse your lips. “It is a concerning challenge for all of Spira. We all need to move quickly before the Sin eradicates more lands and kills more people.”
“This is not a competition on who can beat the force, especially the chances of living when you’re up against it has always been low,” you emphasize, “which is why we have to keep on going and hopefully wipe out Sin, even if that would take us years.”
Joshua realizes the heavy burden of being a summoner even more after you show your strong will to the pilgrimage and defeat Sin. He is well aware of how the end will go for every summoner and guardian, but he’d rather face what is coming close to him than worry about the sacrifices to be made at the end. It’s still a long way to the end, anyway.
In fact, he appreciates how unfazed you seem. He certainly knows that you’re aware as well of how this journey would end if you even reach it. Despite being a full-fledged summoner like you, he believes he might gain a new lesson or two from you. He needs to have a brave heart like yours.
Joshua widens his eyes in realization and clasps his hands together. “Oh, you’re here to pray and communicate with the fayth. Right, right! You guys must be in a rush—”
“Not really, Joshua. It’s alright,” you offer a comforting smile. “Since we arrived here a little late at night, I might go through the Cloister of Trials and Chamber of Fayth tomorrow morning instead.”
“We’ll be staying at the inn for now,” Vernon informs. “At least _____ will have enough energy for tomorrow's trials and chamber. They might be drained now after the long journey.”
Seungkwan chuckles. “_____ might collapse if they were to continue now after those battles with fiends on the way here.”
Joshua and his guardians jointly gasped so loudly. “What fiends have you encountered on the way here?” Mingyu asked.
“We didn’t meet any fiend on our way here, surprisingly,” Seungcheol carelessly realizes. Joshua then lightly smacks his arm, “Be understanding instead, Cheol.” Seungcheol sends his apologies to him, especially to you, after that.
You wave off with your hand to Seungcheol and answer Mingyu’s question, leaning to the white staff on your hand. “Several of them. A sinspawn, several Bombs—those annoyingly fiery creatures that almost blasted in front of us, if you know—and too many of the Elementals,” you grimaced as you recalled everything. “Mostly the White Element for the Elementals, for sure.”
You were left with the summoner and his guardians’ jaws dropped. Vernon snickers at their reactions, folds his arms, and asks, “They look too clean after all of those battles, right?”
Oh, he really had to do that to brag you? You raise your brow to Vernon and shake your head.
“Yeah, for sure,” Mingyu promptly answers. Seungcheol adds in and says, “Thought you traveled from the Highroads to Djose peacefully even.”
Joshua slowly steps closer to you and eyes at your clothes. You are clothed in a dandelion kimono-style top with draped sleeves resembling white clouds around your wrists. The bottom of the silky top has a long strip that wraps around your waist, also securely tied as a ribbon at your back. You also have very loose and light white bottoms, flowing with the wind very easily with minimal movement. There was a comfortable touch in your outfit with your brown sandals as well.
“You impressively do look flawless after a long day,” Joshua softly tells you. He then notices more details about you. You are subtly embellished with shine, especially around your ears and neck. All the hoops and studs on your ears, a thin silver chain necklace, and the small glittered four-pointed stars around your collar shimmer as strikingly as your eyes, adding more to the radiant presence of yours. “Still looking as great as the last time I saw you.”
You smile in gratitude and thank him. “Thanks, you don’t even look like you just finished the trials and praying to the fayth all day. Those are taxing, for sure,” you also went for a look at Lord Joshua.
The male summoner is adorned with a long navy blue velvet coat, a black patterned white shirt, and khaki belted pants that are loosely laced up at the flares. The anklet on his right leg is visible from the flares, beaded with shells and stones on top of his chunky black boots. He, too, has several piercings on his ears, complementing the bangles on his wrists and silver staff on his hand. The streaks of red on his long hair reflect under the sun, making him look as majestic as ever.
His whole outfit screams like an experienced adventurer and warrior. It is no surprise, as he got to travel around the entirety of Spira while being an apprentice summoner. There is this gentleness and elegance in his entirety, undeniably making people mistake him as royalty of a different land countless times.
You timidly nod and step back, confirming and standing up to your heart's thoughts. You look breathtaking—untouchable even.
The guardians obviously sense something between you two. It takes a knowing eye contact between Seungkwan and Mingyu before they even make a move.
“I believe Lord Joshua also needs the rest for the day,” Mingyu gently pulls Joshua and bows down to your presence. “He also has a whole day ahead of him.”
Seungkwan steps closer to you and pushes you to the door, “And so do you, _____! You better wash up and go to bed soon!” Your two other guardians greet the lord and his guardians before Seungkwan drags you further away.
“You didn’t go to bed as what your guardian said,” Joshua chuckles.
You fend for yourself, raising your hands, “I couldn’t sleep, and I just found you waiting by the inn's lobby.” Joshua looks and discovers your revealed wrist knives after your flowy sleeves slid downwards to your elbows.
Joshua retorts, “I’ve always thought you’re the go-with-the-flow type, how everything seems to be easy for you like sleeping. Seungkwan seems to nag you a lot if you deviate.”
You pull your sleeves up to your shoulders and grab a rock to throw at the body of water in front of you. “I am kinda like that. Although there are times when you must be hard-headed and move against the current,” you hand Joshua a different rock, “like how I had to summon an aeon to beat a sinspawn. All four of us struggled to beat the sinspawn. I can’t pray and heal all of us every time we get huge attacks. Ifrit was my answer to my problem, especially since sinspawn’s biggest weakness is fire.”
“Because Ifrit’s element is fire,” Joshua murmurs and throws the rock you handed him. “Makes sense. It’s a great countermove if you have almost nothing left in you.”
“Exactly!”
Joshua jumps at your exclaim, making him chuckle once again and scratch his head. “Don’t tell me Seungkwan told you not to summon an aeon?”
You smirk and stand up. “I’m not gonna tell you then.” You move closer to the shore, “Summoning an aeon is part of our job description, but I try my best not to exhaust all of my aeons since we can survive most battles—there are four of us! But that sinspawn came by after too many battles with fiends along the way, so we were kind of done when it came to that. I had to summon one.”
Joshua nods in understanding and follows you. He ends up removing his boots as his feet are too close to the water, only left with his anklet and his flared pants dipping into the water.
“Your journey sounds quite thrilling though. This may be a pilgrimage, but it is also almost like a test of survival,” Joshua stands tall beside you, basking into the moonlight and deeply breathing in the oxygen. He breathes out and uncomfortably tells you, shooting his hands to his pockets, “It—it really is a challenge, _____. The battles get absolutely exhausting. But if your instincts warn you beforehand, it is best to depend on it and take measures.”
“Also, your weapons won’t completely save you from a huge sinspawn, especially Sin,” Joshua jokes, making you shake your head and look at the concealed wrist knives under your sleeves. “That’s the point of all the training we went through to be here. For the summoning and all.”
“But you know, being well-versed with any weapon other than the staff is a huge advantage already,” you pointed out. “At least you have something else, especially for fiends intolerable to spells.”
That showed the independence you hold, regardless if you have three guardians on your tail. “As you said, it’s survival. These guardians sacrificed their time to protect us and our journey to defeating Sin. Learning what they can do can help me attain their goal if there’s a time when we’re no longer complete.”
You raise your head to view the vast oceans. You say under your breath, “Like us, they will have their end to their fate that we wouldn’t expect.”
An uncomfortable silence flowed with the air brushing your clothing. There was this unsettling feeling bubbling within yourselves on the inevitable.
Joshua presses his lips into a thin line. You say with a trembling voice, “We’ve done the sending many times already, and I don’t want to do that countless more times soon.”
The sending—the ceremony of guiding the dead’s spirits to the Farplane—has been a sorrowful yet hopeful aid to the people a summoner could give. Every time Sin destroys a wide land filled with many lives, you always perform a sending to give assurance to the living that the souls of the dead are brought and taken care of at the Farplane.
Joshua softly asks to nowhere, “Sin, what have you done?” With a heavy sigh, he sits back down on the stones and rocks his feet in anxiousness. He feels his feet get cold by the water swishing back and forth in front of him.
“It has made us braver.” He looks up at the view of you playing with your sleeves. “Come to think of it, we’re cowards to some extent, but we wouldn’t have reached this far without the will not to back out,” you look back at him. “It’s like how I would love to say no to the question, “Ride ze shoopuf?” but I would never say that with my full chest because I have to keep going.”
Joshua tries to hide his laugh. “You don’t want to ride ze shoopuf?”
You glare at him, observing his behavior well enough to say that he finds it funny without knowing the context. “I fell once from a shoopuf, okay? Falling down from that large of a shoopuf was terrifying!”
“Tell me, the shoopuf also saved you, right?” Joshua asks you with a knowing look. “They’re nice enough to pick you up with their trunks.”
And he’s right. You didn’t even have to answer him. The elephant creatures do have soft hearts to pick anyone up from the water. Maybe the feeling of falling down made you dread to ride a shoopuf again.
“Shut up,” you roll your eyes. Joshua finally laughs out loud, which makes you exhale heavily in annoyance.
You scoop water from the shore and let it flow down to his head from your hand. “We have to ride a shoopuf to Moonflow after my trials and prayers at the Djose Temple, and this is also something I have to prepare!”
Shaking his head to get the water out of his face, Joshua laughs louder than ever, considerably loud enough to wake fiends nearby if there’s any.
You huff, completely forgetting about the nature of Lord Joshua when he’s not on the job. “We just meet each other frequently without conversing like this. It’s been a while since you laughed hard because of my misery,” you give him a forced smile.
“It’s been a while since I visited Besaid,” he smiles as memories resurface. “Besaid was wonderful.”
Joshua holds strong memories of his short break at Besaid. He mainly went there to visit a high summoner at your temple, but he got to extend his stay for several days to take in and admire the island.
That extension of several days featured you, of course, who took him around the island, especially the beach and valley. You knew so well that he’d enjoy views like those.
“It’s also been a while for me since I left Besaid,” you finally sit back down beside him. “This homesickness is hitting me every inn we stop at. What is left here with me from Besaid are my guardians and my weapons.”
Joshua tilts his head and asks, “Have you ever thought of stopping the pilgrimage and going back home to Besaid? Many, if not most, summoners stop their pilgrimages even if they’ve come far.”
“I miss home, but I’d rather come back to Besaid when I’m sure that Sin is gone,” you look back at him, melancholy reflecting through your eyes. You rhetorically ask, “Don’t you think it’s a waste of time to go through months of traveling, praying, and battling if you eventually stop stepping closer to the goal? Doing all of this is a privilege of a summoner already.”
Those are words Joshua expected. You’ve repeatedly held up this persistence to the end of Sin like a broken record. Joshua sensed that you seem to never look back and continuously move forward.
For him, he had tried to step backward many times, but his own guardians often pushed him forward and brought him back to his senses. He has always felt the presence of cowardice within him, and it takes over him in a spur.
He is brave, just like you, but he can’t seem to let it set in his mind like how you do it. Maybe he just needed this pep talk with you. He has listened so much to your words, especially to the answers to his questions, and it undeniably made him want to stand up taller than he is.
“The pilgrimage made me want to cry many times,” Joshua earnestly shares. “No, it made me cry several times already,” he corrects and laughs at himself, “but being a summoner is a blessing not everyone has. It’s made out of hard work, faith, and sincerity. We’re here to bring the Calm, and it’s the only thing I’ve been holding on to to not completely surrender.”
“Say, would you like to go through the pilgrimage with me?” he wholeheartedly asks. “It may be unconventional for two summoners to go through a pilgrimage together, but at least we could raise the chances of finally coming home and returning the Calm?”
With offers like this, you sometimes consult with your guardians first, especially Vernon. You got several offers of marriages throughout your pilgrimage, and you instantly rejected them without hearing the guardians’ opinions because you know each other. They have enough trust in you to make decisions, despite their main role to guide you. They understand you as well—always understanding where you’re coming from.
You can’t help but smile. “Do you even have the patience to wait another whole day before we leave together for Moonflow?”
“A day is not too long for me, _____. Don’t worry,” he gently pats your head. “I’ll still be here after everything, promise.”
“You ready?” Seungkwan worriedly asks you, looking all over you to ensure you’re ready. “I know we’ll go through the trials together, but I just want to know if you’re… alright?”
You lift your eyebrow while tilting your head. You confusingly answer him, “Why yes, Kwan… I think I should be the one asking you that.”
Chan groans. “We’re with _____ for the trials. Stop babying our summoner!” Chan fusses and shakes Seungkwan, leaving you snorting and facing back to ask Vernon with an uncontrolled smile, “Haven’t we done the trials several times already?”
Vernon shrugs and tells you, “Yeah, but the trials in every temple are different from each other.” He looks at Seungkwan behind you and nonchalantly adds, “We’ll be fine either way. We have each other here.”
On the other hand, Joshua gets nagged by his own guardians for not communicating with them about something else. “Just tell us you like _____!” Mingyu lightly hits Joshua with his bamboo fan, “There is no problem with adventuring with them. Just be less of a coward and confess to them—”
Joshua calmly exhales and holds on to his staff tighter, “I do not like _____ that way—”
Seungcheol cocks his head and smirks. “Oh, stop there! It’s too obvious, Shua!” He points a finger at the summoner, “You are willing to wait another day for them. That’s enough evidence!”
Joshua feels something funny on his leg and looks behind. The lower tip of your staff at Chan’s hand gave him a small tickle.
“Give your final words to our summoner,” Chan bluffs, leaning on your tall weapon with his other hand on his hip. “We’ll be leaving for the trials in a while.”
“You let yourself loose with them very quickly that way,” Seungkwan behind him mutters, “they’re obviously older than you.”
Chan huffs and looks at him, “Can’t I take my role seriously?”
“Being a guardian doesn’t require you to be very serious, Chan,” Joshua sweetly says to the young guardian. “These two love to make fun of me,” he says with a pointing hand towards his two guardians behind him.
He hears you call for Chan and ask for your staff. Chan widens his eyes and steps closer to Joshua, handing your staff to his free hand. “Lord Joshua, you’re just in time. You know what to do,” the guardian hushes to him. “Give it to them and say your vow or something.”
“Your vow,” Mingyu muffledly says with his hand covering his mouth, holding in his laugh. He quietly tells Seungcheol beside him, “I like this guy already.”
Joshua blankly stares at your staff for a couple of seconds before he fixes his posture and walks to where you’re standing—at the end of the ascending stairs to the door to the Cloister of Trials.
Vernon in front of you stops your rambling to him about the complex probability of any fayth hearing your prayers for Sin’s defeat and turns your body to the back. You’re immediately faced in front of the lord, and you confusingly look at him and your staff on his hand back and forth.
Before you even ask, Joshua bashfully answers your question, “Chan told me to give it to you.”
You see Chan, Seungkwan, and Joshua’s guardians silently cheer for you behind Joshua across the other side of the temple. You roll your eyes and chuckle.
You reach for the staff on his hand and thank him. “Well, I’ll be gone for a while. I hope you stand by the words you told me last night at the bottom of the Djose Highroad.”
Joshua eagerly nods. “Of course, I had to book another night at the inn earlier,” he remembers as he felt his pockets a little lighter than before, “I had to pay a few more gils for that.”
Scoffing, you chide, “I should’ve paid! We also have extra coins, and paying must be a nuisance because of your compliance with my agenda today.” You ask Vernon to pull out your pouch of gils. “We’ll pay you back, just so we’re even.”
Joshua hides his hands in his pockets. “Nope, I’m not taking that. I’m the one who offered the joint pilgrimage.” He confidently smiles at you, obviously that fighting back wouldn’t affect him.
You wave your hand to Vernon to keep the pouch again. Frowning, you immediately give in. “Fine, but that’s for now. I’ll pay you back next time.”
Joshua shakes his head. “No need to,” Joshua warmly smiles, “your presence is highly regarded already.”
“Says a fellow summoner,” you quickly reply, making him laugh softly. You brush your clothes and tell, “I believe I have to get going.”
“Oh.” Joshua nods, “Of course. Good luck, _____.” The redhead teases, “I’m not going to spoil anything for you.”
Intentionally darting your eyes anywhere else but Joshua, you say, “Yeah, sure. We can do it on our own. Right, Vernon?”
Vernon, behind you, quickly salutes and confirms, “Absolutely. The trials are always a no-brainer for _____!”
Vernon and Joshua erupt in laughter while you groan at your guardian. “The trials are a collective effort, Vernon!”
Joshua notices that your guardians seem to look up to you a lot, which is unquestionably evident in how they treat you, other than being your best friends. You seem to have a solid family, something that Joshua could relate to when it comes to his sibling-like guardians.
Joshua clicks his tongue and exhales. “Really, _____. Good luck, I know you guys can do it,” he reaches for your hand and strokes the back of it, “I’ll still be here, waiting. You don’t have to think about me leaving or disappearing.”
Moved by his care and affection, you heartfully thank him for his patience and reassurance. To lighten the mood even more, you jokingly ask, “Help me with the shoopuf thing after this?”
The summoner clad in blue sheepishly shakes his head. “Of course, I’ll also still be here to help you with the shoopuf,” he smiles in endearment and scratches his head.
Vernon calls the rest of your guardians and gathers at the first few steps of the stairs. On the other hand, you give your goodbyes to the other summoner your heart seems to can’t get rid of.
“Goodbye?” you unsurely greet Joshua, “We’ll definitely see each other at the end of the day or tomorrow, anyway.”
You’re not sure whether to let go of Joshua’s hand on yours or not when his soft hands have been warming up both yours and your heart.
“No goodbyes, just good luck,” Joshua finally lets go of your hands, “I’ll definitely see you very soon. We still have a long road ahead of us.”
You nod and step back, hiding your smile on your way to your guardians at the steps. “Bring it on.”
anyway i unexpectedly became busier than ever, hence the horrible delay of my hoshi new year fic..... im so sorry, suddenly had a ton of stuff to deal with (uni, org, and applying for internship)
BUT im still working on them whenever i have time 🙏 just expect that my supposed seasonal fics would be.... out of season yk, i still want to write them either way so im still pushing the series! just very..... big delays lol
how is everyone tho? i hope everyone's doing great 🫡 i still drop by very often so i can respond to notifs or messages quickly so dont be shy to still interact or something lmao
♡ PRINTED PAGES & RED-INKED HEARTS — a seventeen college au series
Experience the different red-themed seasons and holidays, from Christmas to Valentine's, with different fluffy and sweet stories of members of Diamond Print Lab—a student organization that offers printing services within a university.
Interested? Kindly inquire with any of the members listed below to get started.
♡ — A QUICK OVERVIEW OF DIAMOND PRINT LAB
The Diamond Print Lab (DPL) is a tight-knit organization that offers a variety of services, such as printing documents, ID photos, certificates, bookbinding and ring binding, photocopying, laminating, etc. They provide typical printing needs of students, other student organizations, faculty, and university offices.
DPL consists of student volunteers who willingly and wholeheartedly provide the services and complete the orders. They all do the general work of serving customers through shift work and are also doing work specialized in their assigned departments.
♡ — MAIN SERIES
CHAN LEE
DEPARTMENT: Services
POSITION: Services Officer
STATUS: Active
EVALUATION:
DROP, COVER, HOLD ON
— fluff, slight comedy, christmas au
— suitor services officer!chan and admin support officer!reader
Chan, who never lacked patience with you, has been courting you for almost a year. Even with the treatment similar to an actual relationship, he never pushed you to give him your yes because he's just naturally down bad for you. But you make an effort to finally give him that sweet yes during the university tradition of the Christmas tree lighting, even if that is scheduled during a hectic week, as an early Christmas gift to him. That guy already freaks out and combusts with your simple words. What more if you finally seal that approval of being in a relationship?
[EVALUATION RELEASE HERE]
SOONYOUNG KWON
DEPARTMENT: Marketing
POSITION: Promotions Committee Head/Marketing Officer
STATUS: Active
EVALUATION:
NUMBER ONE
— fluff, new year au, best friends to lovers
— marketing officer!soonyoung and non-member!reader
The cute and affectionate Soonyoung decided to spend the New Year's with you as both of you will be entering the new year alone without your families. Despite living in a different dorm, he is almost like your roommate, frequently coming in and out of your dorm. Although it is unknown if he would let his best friend do the same to his heart as you courageously confess right before 12 AM hits to accomplish another bullet in your bucket list at the last minute.
[EVALUATION RELEASE HERE]
SEUNGKWAN BOO
DEPARTMENT: Project Management
POSITION: Project Management Officer
STATUS: Active
EVALUATION:
DEMO
— fluff, fake dating au, valentines au, childhood friends to lovers
— project management officer!seungkwan and project management officer!reader
Seungkwan said he was in a relationship during a secluded Christmas party with his friends in DPL despite not asking out anyone since high school. To prove that in front of his friends, he thought of you—his childhood friend, who is still one of his closest friends up to date—to be his "significant other." With that new status, how will you two behave around the office after whatever slipped from Seungkwan's mouth, especially since both of you are assigned to host the upcoming DPL anniversary event?
[EVALUATION RELEASE HERE]
JIHOON LEE
DEPARTMENT: Purchasing
POSITION: Purchasing Consultant; former Purchasing Director
STATUS: Active
EVALUATION:
(RUN) OUT OF BREATH
— fluff, comfort, slight angst, slowburn-ish, best friends to lovers
— purchasing consultant/IT major!jihoon and services director/IT major!reader
Even way before you two joined DPL in separate years, you have always been friends. As you go through projects together and work around the office, your bond strengthens your already close friendship, blending moments of laughter, late-night study sessions, and quiet support. But unspoken feelings begin to surface as months go by, and the line between friendship and something more slowly becomes less prominent.
REMARKS: This could be a slowburn, so this fic may cover a long plot with a lengthy time coverage. This may take more than one season, so expect that multiple/all seasons are included.
[EVALUATION RELEASE HERE]
♡ — SIDE STORIES/SPINOFFS
without thinking - project management officer!vernon (prequel/preview to a long vernon fic (still in progress)); fluff
and more to come! :D
♡ — NOTES FROM RIEL
the four are the main stories! i would love to post more with the other members if i have the time or after i complete the four! i actually do have wips in store for the other members, so please look forward to those, even though i am still not sure when i'm gonna post them :'> I'll still be prioritizing the main stories!
as these are seasonal fics, completing this series might take a while. i also couldn't tell when i'm going to complete and post these, but please expect them to be posted within their assigned seasons! if we're looking at those with more than one season, expect them at the end of their last season lol
feel free to ask about lore or whatever in my own life in this organization... or anything really! i wouldn't mind yapping about DPL/my organization (they're just the same in my head lmao)
i'm also considering making socmed aus to know more on how DPL works! i think the conversations through text also show how they operate, so i think it'd be cool to do that with the svt members :0 let me know if anyone's interested! (i might do it for my own enjoyment though lol)
if you know where I study, this entire series is such a big reveal. please pretend not to know the name of the organization i'm from! just kidding...? i just love my organization so much that it's so easy to make a series set in an environment similar to it! my life outside my classes has been evolving around my beloved printing business-slash-organization, so please bear with me, i might continue this until i graduate and (unfortunately) leave the organization :p /hj
(my organization has no idea of this btw please don't tell them of it lmao)
♡ PRINTED PAGES & RED-INKED HEARTS — a seventeen college au series
Experience the different red-themed seasons and holidays, from Christmas to Valentine's, with different fluffy and sweet stories of members of Diamond Print Lab—a student organization that offers printing services within a university.
Interested? Kindly inquire with any of the members listed below to get started.
♡ — A QUICK OVERVIEW OF DIAMOND PRINT LAB
The Diamond Print Lab (DPL) is a tight-knit organization that offers a variety of services, such as printing documents, ID photos, certificates, bookbinding and ring binding, photocopying, laminating, etc. They provide typical printing needs of students, other student organizations, faculty, and university offices.
DPL consists of student volunteers who willingly and wholeheartedly provide the services and complete the orders. They all do the general work of serving customers through shift work and are also doing work specialized in their assigned departments.
♡ — MAIN SERIES
CHAN LEE
DEPARTMENT: Services
POSITION: Services Officer
STATUS: Active
EVALUATION:
DROP, COVER, HOLD ON
— fluff, slight comedy, christmas au
— suitor services officer!chan and admin support officer!reader
Chan, who never lacked patience with you, has been courting you for almost a year. Even with the treatment similar to an actual relationship, he never pushed you to give him your yes because he's just naturally down bad for you. But you make an effort to finally give him that sweet yes during the university tradition of the Christmas tree lighting, even if that is scheduled during a hectic week, as an early Christmas gift to him. That guy already freaks out and combusts with your simple words. What more if you finally seal that approval of being in a relationship?
[EVALUATION RELEASE HERE]
SOONYOUNG KWON
DEPARTMENT: Marketing
POSITION: Promotions Committee Head/Marketing Officer
STATUS: Active
EVALUATION:
NUMBER ONE
— fluff, new year au, best friends to lovers
— marketing officer!soonyoung and non-member!reader
The cute and affectionate Soonyoung decided to spend the New Year's with you as both of you will be entering the new year alone without your families. Despite living in a different dorm, he is almost like your roommate, frequently coming in and out of your dorm. Although it is unknown if he would let his best friend do the same to his heart as you courageously confess right before 12 AM hits to accomplish another bullet in your bucket list at the last minute.
[EVALUATION RELEASE HERE]
SEUNGKWAN BOO
DEPARTMENT: Project Management
POSITION: Project Management Officer
STATUS: Active
EVALUATION:
DEMO
— fluff, fake dating au, valentines au, childhood friends to lovers
— project management officer!seungkwan and project management officer!reader
Seungkwan said he was in a relationship during a secluded Christmas party with his friends in DPL despite not asking out anyone since high school. To prove that in front of his friends, he thought of you—his childhood friend, who is still one of his closest friends up to date—to be his "significant other." With that new status, how will you two behave around the office after whatever slipped from Seungkwan's mouth, especially since both of you are assigned to host the upcoming DPL anniversary event?
[EVALUATION RELEASE HERE]
JIHOON LEE
DEPARTMENT: Purchasing
POSITION: Purchasing Consultant; former Purchasing Director
STATUS: Active
EVALUATION:
(RUN) OUT OF BREATH
— fluff, comfort, slight angst, slowburn-ish, best friends to lovers
— purchasing consultant/IT major!jihoon and services director/IT major!reader
Even way before you two joined DPL in separate years, you have always been friends. As you go through projects together and work around the office, your bond strengthens your already close friendship, blending moments of laughter, late-night study sessions, and quiet support. But unspoken feelings begin to surface as months go by, and the line between friendship and something more slowly becomes less prominent.
REMARKS: This could be a slowburn, so this fic may cover a long plot with a lengthy time coverage. This may take more than one season, so expect that multiple/all seasons are included.
[EVALUATION RELEASE HERE]
♡ — SIDE STORIES/SPINOFFS
without thinking - project management officer!vernon (prequel/preview to a long vernon fic (still in progress)); fluff
and more to come! :D
♡ — NOTES FROM RIEL
the four are the main stories! i would love to post more with the other members if i have the time or after i complete the four! i actually do have wips in store for the other members, so please look forward to those, even though i am still not sure when i'm gonna post them :'> I'll still be prioritizing the main stories!
as these are seasonal fics, completing this series might take a while. i also couldn't tell when i'm going to complete and post these, but please expect them to be posted within their assigned seasons! if we're looking at those with more than one season, expect them at the end of their last season lol
feel free to ask about lore or whatever in my own life in this organization... or anything really! i wouldn't mind yapping about DPL/my organization (they're just the same in my head lmao)
i'm also considering making socmed aus to know more on how DPL works! i think the conversations through text also show how they operate, so i think it'd be cool to do that with the svt members :0 let me know if anyone's interested! (i might do it for my own enjoyment though lol)
if you know where I study, this entire series is such a big reveal. please pretend not to know the name of the organization i'm from! just kidding...? i just love my organization so much that it's so easy to make a series set in an environment similar to it! my life outside my classes has been evolving around my beloved printing business-slash-organization, so please bear with me, i might continue this until i graduate and (unfortunately) leave the organization :p /hj
(my organization has no idea of this btw please don't tell them of it lmao)
