THE KING OF HYRULE

My rule is timeless

[theboatking-blog]

Tetra is over right now.

She's telling me all about how Din's face could melt everyone's eyes.

Maybe I should use her to make everyone miserable instead of water.

[theboatking-blog]

TRIFORCE GRANT MY WISH!

GIVE TETRA A MASSIVE COCK!

[theboatking-blog]

((Friend from out of town is visiting, I'll post randomly))

[theboatking-blog]

Pirates

I made that Pirate a Princess...Pirates love being Princesses. 

[theboatking-blog]

Ah, memories.

[notjustafarmgirl-blog]

[theboatking-blog]

notjustafarmgirl:

Group picture :D

Why am I not in the middle? WHERE I DESERVE TO BE.

[theboatking-blog]

Yeah yeah.

allergictocuccos replied to your photo: To all the ladies in the kingdom…

Excuse me while I go tell my Granny there’s a suitor that’s as old as her!

Excuse me while I go tell the Maze Game Girl that there's someone looser than her.

[theboatking-blog]

To all the ladies in the kingdom...

[kingoflightandshadow-blog]

[theboatking-blog]

kingoflightandshadow:

princessofdestiny:

theboatking:

princessofdestiny:

princessofdestiny:

kingoflightandshadow:

I legitimately can’t handle such an affront to logic that that king seems to use. theoracleofseasons

Neither can I, child. I wonder how that man was not thrown from his throne in a— oh wait.

I believe your beau did that in his youth.

Now you see why trash such as this should not be allowed to live or prosper.

And how did you return the treatment? More of the same. Your hatred does not make you mighty; it only extends our cycle of violence.

Just shoot him with a light arrow and we can be done with this. I swear it’s like I have to do everything.

  Do you really want me to bring up the instance in which I killed you, dear beloved King? The time in which I tore your head from your body and threw it to your subjects in the courtyard? That was a memorable moment indeed. Princess Zelda eluded me, but that is a mistake I will not make again.

Ah yes that time...That was an inconvenience good thing Zelda was there to play with time.

[kingoflightandshadow-blog]

[theboatking-blog]

princessofdestiny:

princessofdestiny:

kingoflightandshadow:

I legitimately can’t handle such an affront to logic that that king seems to use. theoracleofseasons

Neither can I, child. I wonder how that man was not thrown from his throne in a— oh wait.

I believe your beau did that in his youth.

Now you see why trash such as this should not be allowed to live or prosper.

And how did you return the treatment? More of the same. Your hatred does not make you mighty; it only extends our cycle of violence.

Just shoot him with a light arrow and we can be done with this. I swear it's like I have to do everything.

[theboatking-blog]

kingoflightandshadow:

I legitimately can’t handle such an affront to logic that that king seems to use. theoracleofseasons

Neither can I, child. I wonder how that man was not thrown from his throne in a— oh wait.

I believe your beau did that in his youth.

Now you see why trash such as this should not be allowed to live or prosper.

Someone isn't enjoying their desert vacation...

Want me to send some cold spring water? I'm sure Link could get it there before the timer runs out.

[theboatking-blog]

[theboatking-blog]

theoracleofseasons:

theboatking:

garomastah:

theoracleofseasons:

garomastah:

theoracleofseasons:

garomastah:

theoracleofseasons:

garomastah:

garomastah:

theoracleofseasons:

theboatking:

What are yall kids? There is shit to be done.

Shouldn’t the Links be out fighting evil and collecting bottles or something?

And Ganondorf writing in his journal about how the injustice his people feel makes up for him being such a…

Why thank you. You make a good fourth daughter.

Also, when is that beau of your going to come inform me of his intentions, hmmm?

We’re coming back to Termina later, because he wants to see Skully alone?

So I dunno

…. Should I have a Garo watching them? I’m worried that he might hurt the boy.

Or, more likely, the boy will hurt him.

Truthfully I was expecting the Garo to be watching regardless

Yeah I know I obviously trust both of them

Well by now you know I hardly trust anyone to the full extent.

I’ll have my general watching them for safe keeping.

Thanks sir, I’d be happier knowing if anything bad happens they can be separated.

Never a problem. I would hate for even MORE skirmishes to happen in Ikana. We are already too well known for our wars.

BLAH BLAH BLAH! You want to talk about a war? 

OCEAN! 

That’s my strategy. 

….

No, actually, wasn’t your strategy praying to the Goddesses because you were losing?

Divine right of Kings. I'll make a side note that they helped out. People will only remember what history tells them anyway. 

[theboatking-blog]

[theboatking-blog]

garomastah:

theoracleofseasons:

garomastah:

theoracleofseasons:

garomastah:

theoracleofseasons:

garomastah:

garomastah:

theoracleofseasons:

theboatking:

What are yall kids? There is shit to be done.

Shouldn’t the Links be out fighting evil and collecting bottles or something?

And Ganondorf writing in his journal about how the injustice his people feel makes up for him being such a…

Why thank you. You make a good fourth daughter.

Also, when is that beau of your going to come inform me of his intentions, hmmm?

We’re coming back to Termina later, because he wants to see Skully alone?

So I dunno

…. Should I have a Garo watching them? I’m worried that he might hurt the boy.

Or, more likely, the boy will hurt him.

Truthfully I was expecting the Garo to be watching regardless

Yeah I know I obviously trust both of them

Well by now you know I hardly trust anyone to the full extent.

I’ll have my general watching them for safe keeping.

Thanks sir, I’d be happier knowing if anything bad happens they can be separated.

Never a problem. I would hate for even MORE skirmishes to happen in Ikana. We are already too well known for our wars.

BLAH BLAH BLAH! You want to talk about a war? 

OCEAN! 

That's my strategy. 

[theboatking-blog]

Silly Princess

princessofdestiny replied to your post: Truth or Dare?

You don’t seem pretentious at all.

Well let's just see how much the royal guard stands up to Ganondorf when he shows up to kidnap you for like the up-tenth time?

Half the time I let it happen, so I don't have to deal with you in the castle. You really cramp the style of my sexy parties.

[theboatking-blog]

Truth or Dare?

What are yall kids? There is shit to be done.

Shouldn't the Links be out fighting evil and collecting bottles or something?

And Ganondorf writing in his journal about how the injustice his people feel makes up for him being such a loser?

:sigh: Why do I have to be the only amazing person here in this entire kingdom?

[theboatking-blog]

Okay!

Goddess...You used to make such good heroes. Why have you forsaken me...

[theboatking-blog]

So why the unfounded hatred towards me? At least I saved my Hyrule, something you couldn't do even if you tried.

Then go on a quest for me and earn my favor!

Bring me a noose and meet me at the tallest tree you can find.