After I’m done with ANYONE.
Ok, rant time. I’ve spent the better part of my adult life wondering why it is that guys don’t care about the girl’s pleasure. Sex, if done right, should be about you focusing entirely on your partner, and them entirely on you. This, when done right means each of you gets your needs met. Some realizations I’ve had as a good, honest man:
1. If she mentions it more than once DO IT. It takes NO effort to actively take an interest in her wants and needs. Instead of doom scrolling at 3 am, go look up what she told you she likes. Show her that her needs are important to you and deepen that connection by learning to better yourself as a sexual partner through listening to her needs and MEETING THEM. It creates a much stronger connection which deepens the sexual experience. AND… It’s your responsibility!
2. Fact: Women need to cum more than once to feel satisfied. And good girls deserve to.
Unlike men, who were given the gift of peeing standing up, women were given the gift of multiple/successive orgasm. Their refractory period isn’t nearly as long as a man’s and thus, they need to cum more than once. If you don’t make them cum more than once, you’re essentially giving them the female equivalent of blue balls, and a very shitty feeling.
3. All women can squirt, but they need to be aroused in order for it to happen. The G spot does exist. It’s akin to the trunk of a tree.. but for the clit. It’s surrounded by erectile tissue that swells in response to arousal. In doing so, you’re actually drawing the nerves to the surface and applying pressure is stimulating them. If you stimulate it enough, it will leave you with a soaked bed and one needy, drippy incoherent mess of a girl.
4. Most (not all) men don’t understand the female body. But there’s no excuse. With unfettered and seemingly limitless access to information, in today’s day and age, there’s no reason why men shouldn’t be able to learn the process for female arousal. All women are different (yes honey, you’re special, daddy knows!), but there IS a standard pattern of arousal. Your texting pregame and FOREPLAY is everything. It’s not about what you do in the bedroom, it’s about what you do before you even cross the threshold into the bedroom. Take the time to make her feel cared for, listened to, and appreciated, and you’ll see how it makes a world of difference in how she responds to your physical touch. Foreplay should be a minimum of 25-30 minutes focused solely on her and isn’t just about riding the clit. It involves her ENTIRE BODY. Pay close attention to her body responses to your touch, your voice, and listen to her when she’s telling you she’s enjoying it. That’s your hint to keep going.
5. If she says she’s going to cum… DONT CHANGE A THING! whatever you’re doing, stay exactly in that position. This isn’t an invitation to fight for your life through her orgasm, and give her your all.. she wants you to stay exactly as you are.
6. AFTERCARE. My god it’s crazy how many men are absolutely spare parts when it comes to this point. It’s not an option but a necessity. Just as you wouldn’t take her to the bedroom and immediately ram it in, neither should you just abruptly end your session. You need to provide her a way of easing out of the experience and transitioning back to normal levels of functioning (chemically speaking). Also, aftercare shows her you value her for her person and not just her body. It’s so essential and men need to understand how important this time is. It helps you build a deeper connection and a better rapport with your partner, serious, casual, or otherwise.
Tip #1. As she’s about to cum, keep your motion steady and slow down a fraction to ease her into the orgasm and delay sensation.
Tip #2. Make her cum and squirt a few times before giving her the goods. Once this happens, she will cum faster every time and it will help create the sensation that her organs are rolling into each other. A truly amazing experience for her.
Ladies, let’s reblog the shit out of this and help it to reach as many men as possible. Thanks for coming to my TED talk.
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