Watch Out For Online Cults
A lot of talk about cults and manipulative people in the community is focused on an in-person level. Things that an in-person group will do, how their control extends into your offline life, but cult behaviors and mindsets can absolutely be used online and may not be as visible or as obvious. Here’s a small, incomplete checklist of things to watch out for, red flags and the like. (Note: I’m not talking about any specific group or individuals here. None of these on their own make a cult, but a lot of them together can potentially mark a toxic environment at least. This isn’t intended to be a diagnostic tool, just things to analyze and reflect on. Please always be safe and don’t let yourself stay in toxic environments whether they “count” as a cult or not.)
The “leader” can do no wrong. They are not capable of truly making mistakes, or any misstep they do make is quickly explained away or defended by their followers. Any criticism is quickly punished, labeled as problematic, or otherwise shut down. Online, people will often sing the praises of or “lovebomb” the leader after these incidents.
It’s Us vs. Them. Anybody who criticizes the group is an enemy. Anybody who chooses not to be a member of the group must have something wrong with them. Critics/people on the outside just don’t “get it” like they do. The “outside” may be painted as threatening/the group as a safe haven, and opposing viewpoints should not be given any attention, even to consider them critically. You’re discouraged from joining other similar groups.
Using social justice lingo as a way to control people. Manipulators can speak the language too. They may bring up gaslighting, gatekeeping, policing, invalidation, and other things and accuse an individual or group in order to either guilt the person into acquiescing or vilify them to the other members. This is a really effective tactic for shutting someone down.
The leader is elevated or enlightened in some way. They claim to be a deity, or at least closer to the divine/enlightenment than you. They have a more effective/direct line of communication with spirits or entities.They have wisdom or knowledge you must stay with them to take part in.
Dictating parts of your online life. Members must change their names, icons, speech/typing patterns, etc. to conform to the group. The rules for behavior in an online setting go beyond what is needed to maintain order. Members may be asked to do a lot to “prove” they deserve to be/stay in the group.
You’re scared to leave. You can’t imagine your online life without this group. You feel like you need the community/resources it provides you. You’re worried members will turn against you if you leave. You’re worried that leaving or voicing concern about the group will have negative repercussions on other platforms.
I’m a cult survivor and I want to add a few things on:
you’re punished or harshly criticized for doing anything “wrong” this includes being vagued about by other members of the group or straight up having call out posts written about you so other members stay away from you. if you make a mistake and feel like all the members are giving you sideways glances virtually or people have stopped talking to you that’s a bad sign.
you’re threatened with being kicked out or blocked for disagreeing with the group, or see others being kicked out for disagreeing.
ex-members of the group have call out posts made about them by current members. call out posts containing screenshots that have been collected for months and weren’t just a recent scroll through is an especially big red flag–groups should not ever document mistakes and sensitive info as blackmail, if you’re worried everything you’re doing is being screenshotted, LEAVE IMMEDIATELY
anyone who disagrees with the group gets put on a collective blocklist/DNI (this does NOT apply for being genuinely harmful, I’m referring to disagreeing on semantics, not bigotry, I don’t want this addition manipulated by TERFs)
talking to ex-members is heavily discouraged or even forbidden. if a group doesn’t want you talk to people who have left, get out of there fast
ex-members are treated like traitors or secretly bullied in private group chats. this can extend beyond just ex-members to people who disagree with or don’t like the group, but if it’s targeted towards former members that is an especially large red flag
discussion of ideas is forbidden at worst or taboo at best. if discussing ideas is seen as betrayal to the group that’s a huge red flag. healthy groups should be dedicated to building up ideas from a variety of viewpoints, not being a hive mind.
everyone defends criticism with the same “scripts” rather than critical thinking. if you’re discussing your beliefs with someone outside the group and instead of thinking through what they’re saying you find yourself replying on autopilot with the same “scripts” everyone else in your group uses that is a red flag.
I could really @ some people