Always been almost
To the most quiet guy in our room, back then,
The only one who’s not my friend,
The one who kept on borrowing my pen,
And kept on seating, next to me, when it’s only an hour before class ends.
The one who I’ve known because he don’t know Jesus,
Which alarmed me because ‘it’ is a must.
That particular question of yours that made me frown, “Who’s Jesus?”
I let you know Him, day by day, which causes our classmates to tease us.
I let you use my Bible and let you read it, everyday.
It’s been quiet challenging, that I thought there’s no way,
for you to have faith in him, which I used to pray,
but, soon enough, in your scientific thoughts, you’ve finally breakaway.
You became a lot more better,
You learned how to smile and to be grateful with whatever.
Too dumb, to notice that, for me, you’re all that matters,
Even though, I swore that I won’t fall for you, ever.
I kept on denying with all these new feelings I’m feeling,
But, no matter what I say, it’s only myself whom I’m kidding.
I avoided you but, you always ran after me making my heart stops beating.
I don’t know what to do to conceal it, it’s tragic and it’s killing.
I don’t know how far I will go,
I don’t even want these feelings to grow.
I don’t want and care about you, that’s what I showed
because, I know this won’t get any better if you’ll know.
It’s hard to avoid and hurt you,
but, this is also for you, boo.
Even though, I yelled and told you, “I hate you”,
But, what I really mean is, “I like you, a lot.” And, that’s true.
It’s been tough and rough,
‘Cause sometimes, in my mind, you just suddenly popped.
I hate to admit it but, I think I’m hopeless and this is enough.
But, you suddenly snapped. With what you’ve said, my heart and jaw dropped.
I thought I was only dreaming and it felt like I was in the air, floating.
I glared at you, because I’m not believing,
even though deep inside, my heart’s fluttering and jumping,
Hearing you say those words, “I like you. I really do, and I think I’m falling.”
Made me dumbfounded in shock.
I was about to say something when I felt your arms locked.
You hugged me tight that made me stood like a dead rock.
I was too happy to say something so I just hugged you back.
You hold me tighter and asked me if I’m feeling the same thing,
I was about to say yes when I heard someone behind me, yelling.
We both pulled away and saw my best friend blushing.
Not sure if she saw and heard everything, maybe she’s overreacting.
We almost had our assurance from each other,
but, I’m happy we could be together.
In my dreams, I thought of being with you forever
But, in reality, the feelings way better.
