Daddy @thedaddybear - Tumblr Blog

Control is such an integral part of most little's fantasies. They want total control, clothing, privileges, food, activities. In a little's perfect world they would never have to make a choice on any of those things. I think this leads to a lot of dynamics jump in head first of having all of those things be strictly decided all the time. But I have found the secret to these is actually leveraging compromise. And I actually believe it's hotter. Let me explain why:

- I think that a caregiver not being so strict is oddly more controlling. Like I think a point of this whole kink is simulating what it feels like to be taken care of which is of course where these decisions come in. But I feel like giving up a little bit of control so that you can ultimately control the whole situation is more hot. Like yeah you can always pick the outfit your little is wearing and then be prepared to punish them if needed. Or you can let them have some input and save the control for when it's more needed. Like at the end of the day your little will still feel your control if they say they want to wear a dress and you say "ok but you need to wear tights" the fact that it was so natural and reasonable proves how little they truly are because they were compliant and understanding. Not once did it cross their mind that they had an option to not listen at all

- It leaves the door open to making the second option worse which is very hot. Like imagine that I want to put a dress on a little but they whine and say that they want overalls instead. Of course kiddo, whatever you want but since it's going to be harder to check you, you're absolutely going to have to wear double diapers today. And when they complain about that then you firmly tell them that you shouldn't ask for things without thinking of the "practical" nature of things. Of course they would get double diapers, you would hate to ruin the overalls.

- finally I think that it makes when you are strict it hits harder. Because the hottest thing a caregiver can do is move in and take control when it's absolutely needed. And make sure you reinforce the why too. "Kiddo I'm not arguing today because we have somewhere to be and unfortunately you have no choice but to listen to me" "I would love to let you wear jeans but last time you leaked in them and I don't want you to ruin them" "you obviously don't know how to dress yourself for the cold, I have to take care of you which means putting you in outfits that you might not like". When there is a "legitimate" reason for the strictness, it reinforces the fact that they need control instead of it just being for fun.