The Dirtbag Dad

Outdoor Adventures Dredged from the Fog of Childrearing

[thedirtbagdad]

… Shadow and shade mix together at dawn But by the time you catch them, simplicity's gone So we sort through the pieces, my friends and I Searching through the darkness to find the breaks in the sky —Lyrics from the magnificent David Crosby’s touchingly heart-wrenching “Hero”. All my life I’ve focused focused on the concept of the journey. Still traveling these days. And no intention to stop. We’ve all been through some rough patches in these times. But the light keeps punching through. Snow down low (~1,500 feet) in SoCal after a cold storm moved through. 📍Tongva (Gabrielino) Land (at Tongva Land) https://www.instagram.com/p/CqcD1dTrnobs316rfa3aLSqcwn0Yr6uviTsz1Q0/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[thedirtbagdad]

As a learner and teacher working to support students for whom I see both their gifts and challenges (often they are related or even one and the same), all this past school year I’ve been contemplating the systemic struggles of compliance vis-à-vis connection. If you know me, you know I’m a connection first person. Every time. This evening, I realized that @lori.desautels book’s title expresses this explicitly (Connections Over Compliance). I’d formulated this dichotomy on my own, yet I’ve long known of her work and book. The zeitgeist was already infused into my subconscious. Her work is very important… check it out. Bear with me… this is connected as well: Tonight I attended @sacredrok’s community gathering program in Merced and came away profoundly inspired. Founder Ron Kauk and others passionately spoke of what happens when Sacred Rok brings a youth—often with daunting challenges laying before—them into magical natural spaces throughout the Sierra: these young humans form powerful connections with the land and with those traveling with them. And those connections open up possibilities and purpose for those who may previously have thought such avenues couldn’t possibly exist for them. And why can’t this be the way (“Nature’s Way”) and the “future of education” as Ron envisions? Because, as I also believe, we are beginning to wake up from our collective slumber and realize that we are not apart from nature, but have been a wonderfully connected component of the web of being all along. https://www.instagram.com/p/CqPqJvKuqRAC8ETs0_9sfCnCT_-_rYar8HhBY00/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[thedirtbagdad]

I’ve run away! As one of my students noted yesterday, “ I can’t do this any more!” I told him I had to agree. So at least for the weekend I’ve run away to Merced, California to attend an event tonight put on by @sacredrok regarding their very interesting approach to education. Excited to see what’s in store! Methinks I need to get out on the road more often. I must take my own advice. 📍Yokuts Lands (at El Capitan Hotel Merced) https://www.instagram.com/p/CqOzqmPPqPZpe_Qhfrng-ZxZDh62pHOK5g38aQ0/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[thedirtbagdad]

Indeed. What I have seen, as well, is that academically challenged students may receive supports; however, their neurodiverse traits that may influence behavior are often under-emphasized (or even ignored) at the expense of a focus on “data“ that supports only academic progress. Academic and behavioral elements work with one another hand-in-hand (in addition to inherent gifts and talents). These characteristics are not distinct and separate. Nor are they components to be addressed separately, each in its own isolated vacuum. Yet when we focus primarily on supporting academic achievement and punishing behavior, the student suffers. Repost @michaelmcknight32 via #linkedin https://www.instagram.com/p/CqKP-u5uJnxv2Gqm-td933nla7-kstR_vhGLrg0/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[thedirtbagdad]

Probably a repeat post. So be it. Rilke’s poem is deeply resonant to me… I read it weekly. It gives me sustaining encouragement to know that there is purpose and method to this seemingly unrelenting madness… even when I have not even a hint about what that significance might be. Go to the Limits of Your Longing God speaks to each of us as he makes us, then walks with us silently out of the night. These are the words we dimly hear: You, sent out beyond your recall, go to the limits of your longing. Embody me. Flare up like a flame and make big shadows I can move in. Let everything happen to you: beauty and terror. Just keep going. No feeling is final. Don’t let yourself lose me. Nearby is the country they call life. You will know it by its seriousness. Give me your hand. Book of Hours, I 59 (trans. Joanna Macey) https://www.instagram.com/p/CqH1KCPuqliFN0w9yFmoNBiBBRi1g8dPk3POs40/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[thedirtbagdad]

It’s critical to understand this distinction. In the special education world so much is about what is “wrong” or needs to be corrected in a child. One of the worst labels is “Emotionally Disturbed” (an actual legal designation). When I first encountered it it, I was repulsed… it sounds like there is something defective with these kids. I came to realize that there wasn’t anything defective about these kids; rather, these are people who’ve experienced severe trauma or traumas. They are doing the best they can within their innate human survival response systems. The work not only is to see their challenges and provide support, but also to see their gifts and talents and to celebrate them. #Repost @bethtyson_traumaconsulting ・・・ I know this will be controversial, but I whole-heartedly believe that being trauma-informed and healing-centered means that we view mental health challenges through the lens of what happened to us and not what’s wrong with us. Labeling children with disorders only layers shame on top of shame. I understand the way our insurance works is to give out diagnoses, but that doesn’t make them true. Learn more and become trauma-informed at the link in my bio. #childrensmentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #psychology #socialwork #parenting #fosterparenting #traumainformed #traumahealing #traumarecovery #traumasurvivor #traumatherapy #traumainformedcare #traumainformedteaching #developmentaltrauma #kinshipcare #grandparenting #grandparentsraisinggrandkids https://www.instagram.com/p/CqCIPS_LYoakq9nAHjXlER44AKNaec2pKI1vb00/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[thedirtbagdad]

Luca: doing it 100% his way. A highly content cat. (at Tongva Land) https://www.instagram.com/p/Cp9tTIsOrZtH5EcmxiPR9TzG_PFZwpQjYId1ig0/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[thedirtbagdad]

I have been thinking about these words from the poet and philosopher David Whyte quite a fair measure lately. They recall the story of Socrates from Plato’s Apologia in which Socrates is told he is the wisest person in the world. He responds that he thinks that’s an absurd statement; he KNOWS that he knows nothing. At the end of the story, after consulting many self-proclaimed “wisest” souls, he discovers that he is, indeed, the wisest person, precisely because he knows his ignorance of the genuinely vast and immeasurable scale of the universe, known and unknown. I’ve been on a journey focused much on “not knowing” lately. And being at peace with “not knowing.” It’s somewhat like a leafless tree enduring cold winter winds. It’s present in the harshness of the season, lacking leaves or bloom, not sure if it will survive another turn of the wheel of seasons. Yet, if it endures winter, its spring will come once again. It needs the winter to rest, to be quiet—so that it rejuvenates its life force for when the spring again does arrive. Then it begins the cycle anew… stronger, more resilient, and with more wisdom-knowledge that help it, perhaps, both endure and thrive. #Repost @davidjwhyte ・・・ Quote by @davidjwhyte Photo by @sattvaphoto --- #poet #poetry #davidwhyte https://www.instagram.com/p/Cp4ZB7wOz652OafGO8JEeFe1R36vYBiX_8MttA0/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[thedirtbagdad]

The power of a teacher. Eloquently expressed by the wonderful Ocean Vuong. #Repost @ocean_vuong ・・・ 7 years ago today. I won the Whiting Award for my first collection of poems that took 8 years, and many more failures, to complete. Winning any prize, strangely enough, is no accurate assessment of yourself in the present, as awards are given for work already done, calcified. But the celebrating of that past labor does include the people who’ve accompanied us to the unimaginable crest. As I walked out of the auditorium and into the reception hall, it was my utmost surprise to see my teacher, Ben Lerner, in the crowd, having just recovered from pneumonia no less. When I saw him I broke down. Because I knew the prize money would go right to a down payment for a home for my mother, the home that she would end up dying in only 3 years later, and that it was in his class, as a 20 year old wannabe poet, that I decided to commit my life to this strange and monastic work. Someone had the mind to capture this moment of utter gratitude and relief, and also the guilt of receiving something so much greater: the vote of confidence from a teacher you admire so deeply. Some things are so indelible and sacred, so gnomic and coiled, they simply cannot be unraveled with words. Good grief—who are we, really, in our momentary triumphs, both large and small? And of what it all amounts to only the ghosts know. ✨ https://www.instagram.com/p/CpwUv8pudVm6FOMzNx2fug1eQYw2PAgV3jwEBk0/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[thedirtbagdad]

What matters? What is important for this day? For this moment? These questions have been deeply embedded in my mind the last few weeks. I’ve been regarding them vis-à-vis much of this life. I’ve thought extensively about my purpose here and how I am choosing to spend these precious days we all have been given. As a Buddhist teacher noted, we all have expiration dates… and we don’t always know precisely when that date will come up. This was vigorously emphasized when a week ago one of my cats, Ricky (the big one) did not immediately greet me at the door a week ago, ready to eat. His brother Luca was there, vociferously crying to be fed as usual. When I offered them their meal, Luca vociferously attacked his portion as usual. But Ricky didn’t eat a bite. This continued through the weekend. No eating. On Tuesday, my daughter was able to take him to the vet for testing and some intravenous hydration. We waited for the results. They came Thursday. He had massively elevated levels of bilirubin… something was not right with his liver. It’s always hard to tell exactly what is going on, especially with older cats. More diagnostic tests are very expensive. Surgery, at this age (both cats were about 14 when I adopted them last October) typically has a very low survival rate. It’s only more suffering with the same result. We knew he was suffering. A lot. My kids and I all had time with him for a day or so. We watched Blades of Fury together and Ricky sat wedged next to me in the armchair, Luca piling in on top of both of us. He got lots of pets. In spite of his pain, he still had space for his content purrs. A drizzly Friday came and I took him to our wonderfully compassionate vet (Vanderhoof Veterinary Hospital). This is not the first pet journey we’ve been through with them alongside. They had us come in at the end of day, when it was quieter. We had a bit more time together as they prepared his leg with a catheter. And then came the injection of phenobarbital. Ricky was purring as I gave him many gentle pets. It works very quickly. Within a minute he was unconscious and within another minute he was gone and free from suffering. [continued in comments] (at Tongva Land) https://www.instagram.com/p/CptpnSDLDH38_wkbHeeHAu22hEAyAkD9-fRb5E0/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[thedirtbagdad]

Indeed. Almost 50% of my monthly income goes to my rent. I live in the Los Angeles metropolitan area and even more “affordable” areas like where I live are costly for housing. A recent EdWeek article (https://lnkd.in/geerT-VJ) highlights a proposed $60,000 minimum U.S.A. teacher salary. ln much of California, this is not really all that helpful. I know because I currently earn a bit less than that $60,000 minimum. Additionally, I have a highly specialized credential that makes for intensely demanding work… that is also simultaneously purposeful and rewarding work. The irony of the current system is that it does attract extremely passionate folks who are willing to work for less because they are driven intrinsically and joyfully by a desire to serve others. The inadequate compensation weeds out those who are looking simply to “earn a paycheck” with other goals (whether intrinsic or extrinsic) in mind. We need fully committed teachers. Yet, we teachers also need to live lives that provide adequate physical sustenance: shelter, drink, and food. Pieces of that may go missing under the current structures. With teachers leaving in droves (and the rate has been accelerating even prior to the pandemic), something has to change… the very future of our citizenry is at stake. I’m not planning on leaving teaching. I’m one of those who are here because we have so much to give and to gain of great value out of that giving. Neither do I not want to only provide my guidance to the elite few with disproportionately massive resources. Those without means need access to learning and resources as well, without a hefty price tag. I don’t know what turns my path will take, yet I have a sense it will be the road less traveled. It may not even involve roads, but route finding in untrammeled roadless country. The going will be challenging at times. Exhausting, frustrating, and frightening even. And what a journey it will be… enlightening, connecting, purposeful. I know, because I’m already on that journey. [continued in comments] https://www.instagram.com/p/CprHRslOdoxTysZ3qNSF0b9mjAIjmw7esYbilw0/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[thedirtbagdad]

The Buttermilk Road and the Bishop area are a mess as a result of ongoing weather intensities. Not a day to be out there, at least with a vehicle. A good alternative is to head to town and curl up with a hot cocoa (or other beverage of choice) and support one of Bishop’s many fine establishments. The rocks have been there for eons… they’ll still be there, more or less when the land dries out. For more area beta and other information, follow the superb @bishopclimbingrangers. 📷 by @amyleistphotography 📍Numu (Northern Paiute), Western Mono/Monache, Eastern Mono/Monache lands. (at Bishop, California) https://www.instagram.com/p/CpqSsjNvVtRFuyUJUO7zUt50QH0J6qZB-m2UDo0/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[thedirtbagdad]

A rhetorical question: Why is it that the most succinct and clear ideas can be so deep and complex? Perhaps the answer lies somewhere within as we behind to dig a bit deeper: perhaps, when considering such ideas, we begin to take into account the depth and complexity of who we each, individually, have come to be and and continuously are becoming. Be kind to yourselves. It can be a path toward showing kindness towards others… and perhaps even to those who are not showing much kindness toward others. #Repost @jeanneheilemanyoga ・・・ Sending you wishes for a lovely Saturday. It starts with you with You. #saturdayquotes #happysaturday #pemachodron#loveyou https://www.instagram.com/p/CpqOuJhPxtmtl69G27LN1jTLrtx8XOkhs_ZluQ0/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[thedirtbagdad]

Some excellent info that can make you more comfy and help reduce impact on this precious land. #Repost @bishopclimbers ・・・ Coming to Bishop for the @heyflashfoxy festival next week? Or planning a trip this spring once all the snow melts? There are a lot of campgrounds with great amenities in Bishop! Here are some to keep in mind: ⛺️ The Pit Campground - the pit is the classic Bishop camping zone - conveniently located near the Happy and Sad boulders with quick access to the 395. For $5 a night you get a campsite with a great view, access to toilets, dumpsters and fire pits, and is a great place to meet climbing partners if you are traveling solo! No reservations required ⛺️ Browns Campgrounds - Brown’s has campgrounds all over Bishop, and their spot in town, “Browns Town” is a great option for warmer months as most of their spots are grassy and shaded! Open March 1st - Nov 30th, they have electricity, hot showers, clean restrooms, coin-op laundry, and amazing homemade pie in their general store. What’s not to like? This is a great spot if you have an RV or trailer, and costs around $30/night to stay ⛺️ Tri-County Fairgrounds - want to camp in town?? Tent camping costs $15/night at the fairgrounds on a grassy setting and includes showers and electricity! No need to reserve in advance unless for an event or a large group ⛺️ Inyo County Campgrounds - these campgrounds are open year round, cost $14/ night, with reservations and walk-ins accepted. There are no hook ups at these campgrounds. Visit inyocounty.us for more info! https://www.instagram.com/p/CpoUgt7JxTtLtIh-SqQ0Yu6VisnrYiAdz_-zTo0/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[thedirtbagdad]

So succinctly and elegantly stated. The empathy, caring, and understanding I give to my own kids and my students derives from my own complex journeys. I am walking and have walked paths not unlike their own. I am them… I see and hear them. And there are others, many, who have come alongside me on my own many odysseys. All of this has given me my own long sought purpose. #Repost @dabrowski.center ・・・ This is an excerpt from a paper by Katherine Lysy and Michael Piechowski from 1983 called "Personal Growth: An Empirical Study Using Jungian and Dabrowskian Measures." This line always stands out for me because it really does capture the basic essence of the theory in a nutshell. You can find this paper on the Dabrowski Center website in the Piechowski Archive at this link: https://dabrowskicenter.org/archives/piechowski-archive/ #positivedisintegration #personalgrowth #empathy https://www.instagram.com/p/CpmSSjJOyJzWHZOlTZwqbprMxxdZUNgkh3VdMA0/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[thedirtbagdad]

An orchid blooms in Altadena. Somehow, this orchid bloomed a second year in a row. It must like the environment I’m trying to foster. (at Tongva Land) https://www.instagram.com/p/CpZRY-qOvzDiNLWcR82DaWoWGeF4Wi9U9L4fTY0/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[thedirtbagdad]

Open your heart and, in turn, the world, to your Wild Thing. Vulnerably and bravely allow it to venture out into unknown places. You will find the going may be both anxiety-fraught and joy-filled… and all the shades of gray that lie in between. You will be alive. https://www.instagram.com/p/CpYk4jgy6ZUTQVfLmET0fzjA90fEho9Phs_lbM0/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=