kyle broflovski

18. SPHS 2024🎓

[stan-r-marsh]

kenny and i left the sleepover to get burgers and he got a text from a girl to meet up. i didn't do anything !! i'm an innocent man !! only thing i'm guilty of is letting a bro get some pussy.

[eavesdroppingonurn]

Kenny and Stan--- MURDER SUICIDE ???

Kenneth McCormick and Stanley were last seen leaving Clyde Donovan's sleep over on May 10th. They've been missing ever since. Recently Kenneth's body washed up ashore at Stark's Pond. Stan is still at large. He may be a killer, he may have seen a horrible crime.

If you see Stanley Marsh, please call Detective Yates at [phone]

[thekyleyb]

What the f why wasn't I invited to this sleepover?!

[stan-r-marsh]

we were doing gay stuff, thought u wouldn't be interested 🫣

[thekyleyb]

wow dunno if I should be more jealous of you or Kenny 😔

[thekyleyb]

when are you going to ask out heidi?

What if she asked me out instead 🤔

[eavesdroppingonurn]

Kenny and Stan--- MURDER SUICIDE ???

Kenneth McCormick and Stanley were last seen leaving Clyde Donovan's sleep over on May 10th. They've been missing ever since. Recently Kenneth's body washed up ashore at Stark's Pond. Stan is still at large. He may be a killer, he may have seen a horrible crime.

If you see Stanley Marsh, please call Detective Yates at [phone]

[thekyleyb]

What the f why wasn't I invited to this sleepover?!

[thekyleyb]

excuse me sir excuse me. what are ur thoughts on big booty bitches?

🍑

[thekyleyb]

Are you ever going to get a girlfriend?

I feel like I maybe blew that chance 😬

[thekyleyb]

Have you ever been in love?

Nope

[thekyleyb]

is it true u had an intense sexual relationship with martha steward

Whose Martha Steward?

[eavesdroppingonurn]

Wendy TestingOurPatience

Wendy was seen today lying 🤥 Though she claims to have never slept with Kyle, multiple sources confirmed it to us. One being from his own household. They had the chance to be honest, but the cat must be let out of the bag.

@thekyleyb @wendy-the-great

[thekyleyb]

Ike is such a snitch lmao

[cludeswoleovan]

i heard kyle has a crush on u

sorry the only dude im into is isaiah lewis

[thekyleyb]

broke my heart into a thousand pieces

[thekyleyb]

Have you ever considered committing murder? If so, what ultimately would make you kill someone?

I have actively tried to commit murder in the past and I will do it again.

[thekyleyb]

What is your favorite season and weather?

Autumn and I prefer it crisp but sunny

[thekyleyb]

Why did you bomb Canada?

I don't want to talk about it.

[thekyleyb]

What's it like to live in Ike's academic shadow?

Frustrating but at least he's my brother so I can take some of the accomplishments as my own, I helped raise him 😎

[thekyleyb]

What do you look for in a partner?

Someone I can harbour a deep connection with, ideally. I'd like someone to challenge me intellectually. I'd also like to overall like them. Not just physically.

[wendy-the-great]

What is your response to the trolley problem? Explain your reasoning.

you divert the train to kill the single person on the track. you’re taking a life to save multiple and that is the “greater good.”

[thekyleyb]

the single person in this situation is Stan, Wendy doesn't hesitate

[thekyleyb]

how bisexual r u

50%