French people when you call it bukake and not "nut a la visage" and shibari instead of "corde attacher l'submissive"
Pisse? In le pantalons???
Mon tabarnak j'vais te décâlisser la yeule, câlice!

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Sweet Seals For You, Always
noise dept.

oozey mess
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Three Goblin Art
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
todays bird

Product Placement

⁂
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her

JVL
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year

@theartofmadeline
Misplaced Lens Cap

JBB: An Artblog!
wallacepolsom
Xuebing Du
One Nice Bug Per Day

tannertan36
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@themurderrose
French people when you call it bukake and not "nut a la visage" and shibari instead of "corde attacher l'submissive"
Pisse? In le pantalons???
Mon tabarnak j'vais te décâlisser la yeule, câlice!
[Tweet from @/fozmeadows: "human gender and sexuality are very much like animal taxonomy, in that both look structured and simple on the surface, but once you start investigating, it turns out there's actually no such thing as a fish despite the fact that we all know what a fish is, and that's okay"]
As a biologist, that is a fantastic comparison.
We talk about “fish” (which, cladistically, do not exist, there is no monophyletic group of “fish” that simultaneously includes all organisms we understand to be “fish”-like while also excluding, say, humans) because, despite the utter fiction that is fish, it’s still a useful label when we talk about certain features that “fish” tend to have in common.
Gender is absolutely the same way.
> looking at a new popular collectible
> ask the people if it's objects or gambling
> they don't understand
> pull out illustrated diagram explaining what is objects and what is gambling
> they laugh and say "it's a good collectible sir"
> look up how to buy a collectible
> its gambling
> #wait are labubu's blind bags?!
Labubus are blind bags but they're also blind bags with some of the most insane dark patterns stacked on top. The online store for them has a thing where they tell you what you got the second you order it online so that you can immediately try again if you didn't get the thing you wanted.
There's also a shake feature that is designed to encourage you to buy more than one by narrowing down the possibility space on a crate of options so that if you're hunting a specific model you can verify that it's guaranteed to be in one of these three IF you buy all three right now!!!!!
You can read more about what dark patterns are and how to spot them here.
The original website about deceptive patterns (also known as “dark patterns”) - tricks used in websites and apps that make you do things tha
That is a fucking awesome site everyone should visit. Don't skip the Hall of Shame.
I just thought of this post, which was actually how I learned what Dark Patterns are, because I tried to cancel my Adobe Acrobat subscription, and it took much longer than I anticipated because several times throughout the process it felt like it was intentionally trying to trick me into thinking I'd cancelled my subscription when I actually hadn't yet.
Please read up on Dark Patterns and learn how to recognize them.
Humanity has finally reached the stars and found out why no one had contacted us. The universe is in a sad state. As such, Doctors without Borders, Red Cross, and many othe charities go intergalactic.
The thing the recruiters don’t tell you about space battles is that you die slowly.
Ships don’t blow up cleanly in flashes and sparks. Oh, if you’re in the engine room, you’ll probably die instantly, but away from that? In the computer core, or the communications hub? You just lose power. And have to sit, air going stale and room slowly cooling, while you wait to find out if the battle is won or lost.
If it’s lost, nobody comes for you.
It had been about half a day (that’s a Raithar day, probably a bit shorter than yours) and Kvala and I were pretty sure we had lost. Kvala was injured, Traav and I were dehydrated and exhausted, and Louv was dead, hit by shrapnel when the conduits blew.
Most fleets give you something, of course. For Raithari, it’s essence of windgrass. I looked at the vial.
“It’s too soon,” Traav said.
Kvala gestured negation, shakily. She had been burned when conduits blew, and her feathers were charred, and her leftmost eye was bubbly and blind now. Even if we were rescued, she probably wouldn’t survive. “You know we’re losing the war.”
They couldn’t deny that. “It doesn’t mean we lost the battle.”
“Doesn’t it? The Chreee have better technology. Better resources. And they have their warrior code. They don’t care if they die.”
“We can’t give up!” Traav protested. They were young, a young and reckless thar who had listened to a recruiting officer and still believed scraps of what they had been told. “Any heartbeat now—”
There was a clunk. Something had docked with our fragment of the ship.
“You see?!” Traav crowed triumphantly.
Kvala exchanged glances with me. The Chreee never bothered to hunt down survivors. What was the point, after all?
The Aushkune did.
There weren’t supposed to be Aushkune here. They were supposed to hide in nebulas.
But if there were—
If there were, we were too late. The windgrass couldn’t possibly destroy our nervous systems in time to stop the corpse-reviving implants, and once you were implanted, it was over—or it would never be over, depending on how you looked at it and whether Aushkune drones were aware of anything—
Footsteps.
Bipedal. The Aushkune were supposed to be bipedal.
And then the blast door opened, and a figure stood in it. My first thought was, robot? That’s almost worse than Aushkune . . . But no, it was a being in some sort of suit.
Who wore suits?
“Friendly contact,” the suit’s sound system blared, as the being moved over to Kvala. “Urgent treatment. Evacuation.”
“Who are you?” Kvala struggled upright.
Despite the primitive suit, the blocky being was using up-to-date medical scanners. “Low frequency right angle shape,” it explained—or maybe didn’t explain. Two more figures came into the room and put Kvala firmly onto a stretcher.
“You’re with the Chreee, aren’t you?” Kvala was not at all happy to be on a stretcher.
“Not Chreee,” the sound system said. “You Man. Soil Starship Nichols.” The being hesitated. “Rescue Chreee as well. On ship. Will separate.”
“You what?” I said faintly. Who would do that?
“Oath,” the being explained.
“What kind of oath? To what deity?”
The shoulders of the being moved up and down. “Several different. Also none. For me, none. Just—oath.”
I exchanged glances with Traav, who looked as unsettled as I was. I had never, ever heard of groups cooperating when they couldn’t even swear to or by the same power.
The being scanned me. “Have water,” it said. “Recommend.”
Raithari have fast metabolisms. I could—would—die of thirst quickly, and painfully.
“Where will you take us,” Traav asked, “after you give us water?”
“Raithari to Raithar. Chreee to Chreeeholm.”
“Chreeeholm would kill them for failing,” Traav remarked.
The being hesitated, and then said, “War news sometimes bad. Sometimes lie.”
We had learned long ago not to believe the recruiting officers, but what did that have to do with anything?
“And you—what?” I asked. “Just fly around looking for battles and rescuing victims?”
The being seemed to consider this. “Best invention of soil,” it said finally.
Most of what it was saying didn’t make any sense. Did it worship soil? But it had said that it had sworn to no deity . . .
Madness.
On the other hand—war was a deliberate, rational act by deliberate, rational people, and I wanted no more of it. So why not embrace madness and see what happened?
“Soil Starship—Rrikkol?” I asked, stumbling over the word.
“Yes. Soil Starship Nichols.”
I followed the being in the suit.
Took me well over a minute to realize "low frequency right angle shape" was Red Cross.
This whole thing is brilliant with translation stuff.
The fact that all the fics i have bookmarked in the heated rivalry fandom (bar one) are written by authors who have NO BOOKMARKS makes me insane. How else am i supposed to find more good fic if not through the bookmarks of those who have gone before me? Sure, have some bookmarks private, but curate some public bookmarks to feed the people (me) PLEASE
An ultra extended flowchart for identifying dynasties! Even identifying sub-periods of each dynasty. As always, this is a general guide ther
does the makeup look sad or happy? >>> goth & sad >>> middle tang dynasty [lmao]
like. i'll leave this alone. but HOW are historical romance books not sexualizing the fall of breeches. literally a blowjob flap. not to mention the collars that open to the diaphragm. the décolletage with a wide neckline one swift tug from being revealed. the calves on display. the intimacy of finally seeing the real hair beneath the wig. cmon it's basic storytelling
i love making a post that attracts everyone with usernames like mozartswigsweat and bonnetenthusiast and foppishrake and petticoatsonpetticoatsonpetticoats and dandyismunlimited within 48 hours. blessed webbed site. merry christmas to us all.
joined a choir in september, and i love singing, happy to be back in a choir, however, the director is Challenging and today, after months of being perfectly happy with me (and giving me a solo at our christmas concert) was like 'take the vibrato out of your voice it is not acceptable in choral singing' as if i have not been singing like this since i first opened my mouth (never had lessons i just sing like this). i will try? for like 5 bars where i think she actually means it but im not taking it out of my voice cause thats so difficulttttt and takes so much concentration and also i will probably go flat cause of the pressure id be exerting? anyway. had already semi decided to leave after the term was over but she's not helping herself here. why are choir directors like dictators? esp when they have multiple choirs, istg
FTH 2026!!!
Browsing goes live 27th February!! Links to follow!!!
I am offering 3 bids this year: 1 commenting and 2 fics!
there are some ships out there that do not speak to me personally but i am an understander for. like i see what you are seeing. it just doesn't personally intrigue me. but i support you. you're right. we don't need to fight, let us hold hands.
#i can appreciate a fine ship from the dock via @mylittleredgirl
the father (dolly parton), the son (sabrina carpenter), and the holy spirit (miss piggy)
My boyfriend, again blending together fanfiction tropes: So what if when you finally find your soulmate, that’s when you discover if you’re alpha or omega, right?
Me, hands shaking as I frantically search for pen & paper: KEEP TALKING
Me: Seems hellish
Boyfriend: So does being an ant person
Me: Again, baby, they’re not ants
Boyfriend: YES THEY ARE. They communicate via pheromones— LIKE ANTS.
Me: So back to the soulmate thing….
Boyfriend: You could trick them into following orders and thinking they’re dead by spraying them with a spritz bottle. I think they need a queen.
Me: So back to the soulmate thing…. Seems hellish!
Boyfriend: Not really. If being around the other person is what triggers the changes, if you want to go back to normal… all you need to do is leave.
Me, writing: (You found your soulmate. It’s changing you in scary ways. All you need to do is leave… how difficult would it be to leave? What pressures exist to stay?)
Boyfriend: So these ant-people—
Me: OMEGAVERSE IS NOT ANTS!!!!!!
there's this one user who annually without fail since i posted this fic 5 years ago comes in to my comments and writes an essay and honestly, this is what authors live for
Merry Christmas!! Take Gifts!!
Untamed fans : https://archiveofourown.org/works/76406521
Wicked fans : https://archiveofourown.org/works/76404661
never forget when saruman literally told gandalf "you've been smoking too much weed bro"
"You're smoking too much weed," says the guy who got addicted to manosphere podcasts on his orb and started a fascist militia with a side hobby of deliberate environmental destruction. Started cutting down trees to own the woke elves.
In fantasy fiction, if you've got some sort of curative substance you just know that it's going to be a potion. It's strange because in real life comparatively few medicines are potion-based, most of them are pills. There's calpol and cough syrup but that's basically it.
Soup
Alcoholic tincture of laudanum
Okay, there's calpol, cough syrup, soup, and alcoholic tincture of laudanum, but that's basically it.
That's basically it.
That's basically it
Does star wars have halloween? Did Padmé and her handmaidens dress up as witches? Do the crechlings dress up as floating pumpkins?