Mystic @themysticarcher - Tumblr Blog

What if there was a voice/entity that only one person could hear and they said “if you can hear me clap once” and then they clapped and everyone looked at them like they were crazy

#shitpost #where did this eve come from lol

I love waking up, laying around waiting for my brain to turn on, and I’ll eventually feel ready to get up!

Then I grab my phone and suddenly would rather fight god than get out of bed…

#shitpost #:(

Friend: “You’re the only one here who’s lactose intolerant!”

Me: “… I’m not lactose intolerant?”

F: “Oh”

Me: “Why did you think I was lactose intolerant??”

F: “I don’t know, you just seem lactose intolerant.”

Me: “…”

What does this mean???

#i cannot stress this enough #this was a REAL conversation I had #WE’VE BEEN FRIENDS FOR YEARS #shitpost #WHAT THE FUCK #WHAT DOES THIS MEAN

Sometimes I get genuinely curious what it’s like to learn English. Like, how are you supposed to remember everything?

My biggest question is when they tell you “if you try to sound it out, your probably wrong”/“the rules are used whenever they feel like it”/“there’s one rule: go fuck yourself” or anything along those lines

#shitpost #english #language #multilingual

pukicho

hey guys if i seem inactive its cause this month I am traveling around europe and these people live in the olden-times, no wifi, warm water

themysticarcher

Okay guys, who wants some cooked Pukicho? There’s no ac over there so it’ll be niiice and steamy

#shitpost

So I live in Texas and the weather cooled by like 20 degrees last week so a bunch of people started wearing sweaters and sweatpants, cause it’s cooler right?

The only problem is that it’s still like 80 degrees outside. So I’m out here wearing a sweater, and SWEATING, cause 75 is now cold to me

#shitpost #texas weather #texas #ITS HOT #HELP

Bruh I freakin HATE when public bathrooms have the mirror&sink right in front of the toilet. Like, you could’ve put it anywhere else, but instead whenever I look up while I’m on the toilet I just stare at myself and contemplate existence

#shitpost #fuck public bathroom

Bruh my bananas went straight from green to brown 😭

Like cmon man how you just gonna skip the ripe phase and just go straight to rotten

#I still ate them tho #shitpost #banana

It’s always so weird when I read/hear something that’s caused by ADHD and I’m always like “surely not, everyone does this!” and then ask my neurotypical friends and they say “what? literally who does that”