Unearth the mystery...

a nonsensical way the ravings of the world as I perceive them to be.

[thenightowlmuse]

Bella & Bello. Bffs for life.

[thenightowlmuse]

Unhappy pig and his bright (BRIGHT) rain coat.

[thenightowlmuse]

The face of fall.

[thenightowlmuse]

story snippets

She steps forward, "you've been out here for almost 10 minutes." That answers that question. "I was almost afraid you'd left again."

I have to bite my cheek to keep the bitter laugh in, "I wasn't aware you'd even noticed the first time."

"I deserved that," her glance anywhere but mine. "I was falling apart and didn't know how to deal with it."

"Not coming home and acting like you didn't care wasn't the answer." And with that I roll past her, back into the suffocating coffee house.

[first-lines]

I still get nightmares. In fact I get them so often I should be used to them by now. I’m not. No one ever really gets used to nightmares.

Mark Z. Danielewski, House of Leaves (via first-lines)

[thenightowlmuse]

WHERE WOULD YOU MOST LIKE TO VISIT ON YOUR PLANET?

Ireland and England. 

[thenightowlmuse]

I got a tattoo!!!!!!

*dances*

Its amazing but it freaking hurt like a bitch. Its gorgeous!!

there are eight stars are in color, pink purple, grey, green, black, clear, red and blue. The masks on the underside are clear and are probably my favorite part. =)

Yay birthdays!!!!

[thenightowlmuse]

Megan in her adorable pug wrinklyness. =)

[thenightowlmuse]

twenty - one

Ever feel like dating is like walking through a mine field? Well it is. Just with slight variations. Think about it. You’re walking through the field, praying not to step on a mine. Dating is hoping to find indeed one mine that if stepped on, it won’t explode. At least not yet. They tend to explode when you least expect. See the logic? No? I know it’s not a simple or even a comparable situation. To me it does make a slight bit of sense.

Same could be said with body image. This might make more sense. Walking through said field this time find a mine and if you don’t fit what society, tv, Hollywood, whatever deems as standards.. (size, height, weight, etc.) It’ll explode. Not literally. This is all highly theoretical. But you get the point. No? Okay then.

I love the courage people have to change who they are. Whether it be by exercising or healthly eating or both. It’s amazing. You have to dig down deep to find the energy and the will to continue. Even if you want to scream, cry, throw things across the room. Whatever. But if you get up afterwards then you deserve a prize. You’ll find it when you look in the mirror. See all the hard work reflected back. I can gaurantee you’ll see a change (okay maybe not gaurantee one but do you get the point finally??)

I read an article earlier that said simply to love yourself. Love who you are as a person. Love your reflection. Love yourself naked with the lights on. Just be happy with who you are.

It sounds so simple.

Those who find it are simply amazing.

[thenightowlmuse]

queen of the snow mound in the park. she's fascinated by it! It's amusing.

[thenightowlmuse]

Sixteen

Today is one of those days where the hormanal imbalance that comes with being a female gives you a rather bleak outlook on the day. I feel insane. Every little thing annoys me to pieces. The urge to leap across the steam table and strangle one of the chefs here grows stronger the more he annoys me. Ironically eating a piece of chocolate. A kit kat bar to be exact. Elevates all these annoying insane feelings. It's nuts. It's either the chocolate has mellowed it out or I fed that hungry beast lurking in my belly. Whichever the case may be I'm quite content currently.

[thenightowlmuse]

fourteen

Valentines day...

Filled with sappy couples, an overload of pink, red roses, shiny hearts, goofy smiles and heartwarming amounts of love.

Maybe I'm too cynical or something, whatever it is that keeps me from truly appreciating this day.

My question is how do you go about celebrating said day when you single or alone?

Share it with the dog? I haven't reached that level of crazy.. yet! I mean you could go out to dinner but wouldn't that defeat the purpose when your sitting at a table for two alone? Don't get me wrong those who are able to just stop thinking and do, get major points in my book.

Maybe it's that deep seated thing of watching or hearing or seeing my friends and relatives happy and in love or in that beginning stages of finding it.

*laughs*

god this makes me sound sad or maybe desperates a better choice. I'm not though that's the crazy part. It's that deep longing to share it with someone who sees past the insecurities and all the (for lack of a better word..) weirdness and sees you as you are. If that exists and you've found it, simply amazing. I honestly don't know if it does exist. I'd like to think it does. That there's someone out there who gets me right down to the core.

The sappiness of this day is I think only a minor fraction of what truly goes into it. There's simplicity, tender touches, soft kisses, shy smiles, and so much more. Its something that grows with age.

And I don't think anybody, no matter what age will ever truly understand valentines day. Its simply special and unique and if your lucky enough to get to share it with someone, don't let anyone get in your way.

[thenightowlmuse]

You have to walk carefully in the beginning of love; the running across fields into your lover's arms can only come later when you're sure they won't laugh if you trip. ~Jonathan Carroll

[thenightowlmuse]

OMG ADORABLE!!! I WANT ONE! :D

[thenightowlmuse]

One of those things that you literally walk over everyday. Unless you're like me, and happen to look down once in a while, you won't ever notice it. =)

[thenightowlmuse]

Somewhat fascinating things you find scrawled in the subways of New York.

[thenightowlmuse]

five

Something I realized while looking in the mirror while getting ready for work. I'm cute. And before you even say it. No, I'm not that person that's obsessed with how I look. I never have been. I know I was always bigger or more curvy than other girls/people and it never bothered me. I don't own make up I don't see the need for it. I have Bert's bee's chapstick. That's enough for me. Maybe it's from growing up camping that makes me the way I am. Another thing I've noticed that if your not a size zero or a stick, you're fat or ugly or hideous or whatever demeaning phrase that comes up and that's probably worse than anything. You should be allowed to have some curves, a little extra padding if you will but you can't. Not in today's world. Then again there are people today that are simply stunning and beautiful in how they look but I know they hate it. And it all leads back to the media and how woman are perceived. You can have guys be curvy and larger than normal and it's perfectly fine. Why not women? Where is it written that you have to be skinny?!? (Granted if there are health risks invovled then yes you have every right to change how you look. Don't hold it against/keep me from you changing yourself into someone better. As long as you don't turn into one of those skinny people who hate others who are fat (that's my only thing sorry)) This leads me back to well me. I've never been skinny. Maybe when I was like seven, but then you hit puberty and everything goes to hell. And then you stare at yourself in the mirror and wonder how to change yourself or learn to accept the person staring back at you. It's hard. It's an incredibly hard thing to do. I think living in New York has actually helped me become a better person in a way. Sadly I have become a swearer and it's horrible. *laughs* okay not so horrible but it's frustrating at times. I moved here mainly because I was madly in love with a girl who broke my heart. But that's okay you know. There's nothing wrong with taking a blind chance and seeing what happens. All of this is I guess in a way how you see yourself. How your enviroment and the people you have around you (family/friends are your support system even if they're online. It still counts. At least it does to me)