Pillarman @thepillarsofmarsandvenus - Tumblr Blog

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jairus666

sexy-necromancing-bird

Is the guy in the cuck chair supposed to stay quiet or is he allowed to clap and cheer

foxgirlmindcrank

he's supposed to take notes and make an intrigued hum when an interesting plot point occurs

conspiracydeerist

blu3str1k3

thisarenotarealblog

one is getting cucked by the bottom and the other is getting cucjed by the top. Subject matter experts discussing the sex like a sports panel

morganoperandi

One cuck always lies, the other always tells the truth. You have one question to determine who’s a top and who’s a bottom.

whumpster-fire

blackhole-ntp

I put some helpful measurements on the axes of the world map to help people measure countries and things on them 😊😊 I wonder why nobody's thought to do this before 😊😊😊

chkq

when people say the usa is like a third-world country or whatever, i think, aw man. if the median american got sick they'd have to sell the goat. i hope cement flooring reaches the median american to reduce helminthiasis. i hope the median american gets access to chlorinated water, fortified foods, and skilled birth attendence. some day we can even hope the median american will have a birth certificate and a savings account.

qsycomplainsalot

Fe-maille uwu

mallowmaenad

dark timeline: manosphere emu egg trend leads to new mainstream egg laying fetish as tiktok overwatchface model girls start roleplaying as having laid the egg the men are about to eat to encourage them to get their nutrients leading to an upward trend in yoshi kirigumis as niche sexual paraphernalia and a new character added to whatever hero shooter or moba is most desperate for new money at the time thats like sexy velociraptor themed with wide birthing hips and the manosphere gets over the emu egg trend when people start making gratuitous high fidelity SFM animations of that character laying eggs as it has now been deemed Gooner Shit to eat emu eggs causing emu farmers dealing with a sudden financial fallout and having to lean into that side of the appeal resulting in a new disgusting egg flavored gamer supps flavor featuring a leggy emu gijinka girl and people arguing online about whose waifu would have the better tasting eggs. Someone on twitter/bluesky/4chan makes a new "dinomama-chan" character who follows in a similar niche to the aforementioned raptor girl but with conventionally attractive young looking anime milf aesthetic who has a deadbeat NEET son who plays video games all day that she makes dino nuggies for as well as scrambled eggs made from her own eggs with all the expected sexual tension. The telephone game leads to trans girls getting better about eating breakfast and lunch by making themselves egg meals and imagining it came out of dinomama's cloaca making the original creator fabulously rich from plushie sales (not from makeship but the other one that lets you sell the plushies with sexualized designs I forgot the name) Hardly any of this is able to let emu farmers financially recover from the loss of sales due to the beginning trend raising the prices to being even more prohibitively expensive causing a politician whose really behind on the internet and culture who still thinks emu eggs give you big dick balls man milk energy lobbying to subsidize the emu farmers and going on hundreds of podcasts resulting in one of them eventually showing him AI generated oviposition porn on their phone making him think lizard people are real and hiding in our midst but like in a Super Mario Bros (1993) way causing another telephone game on bluesky and tumblr that jacking it to dinomama or owning dinomama plushies makes you antisemitic and the premier oviposition and lizardgirl fetish blog on tumblr gets nuked by staff after being mass-reported resulting in edgy transfeminist kinksters adopting an aesthetic around Riptor's cheerleader costume from the 2013 reboot of Killer Instinct in retaliation

voxsymphonia

huh

thotkumi

AWOOGAAAA

orteil42

controversial stance but i do wish i could live forever. i certainly live like i'm going to live forever. i take my time. realistically however my lifespan is dreadfully limited and there are things i've "been meaning to do" that i will never get around to. the Emoji Movie came out almost 10 years ago. in all that time on any random day i could've decided to sit down and watch it, and i did not. how many more decades will slip by like this? conceivably, it could be all the decades i have left. watching the Emoji Movie would not be, after all, a crucial use of my time. much better things to do. i could easily postpone it over and over and over until my final breath where it may not even register to me that i never did watch the Emoji Movie. no great loss, certainly; and yet i find myself intrigued by Patrick Stewart's involvement

kuttithevangu

Reading about an arsenic murder case in which probably a daughter killed her mom with poisoned clam chowder but she was acquitted because the defense were like “can you prove that ANYONE wouldn’t die after eating takeout clam chowder delivered by children in August? In 1896?” and the jury were like no yeah fair point I too have had clam chowder stomach

jibunbosh

we have two eyeballs to see in 3d. we have two ears to listen in stereo. we have two nostrils for like. fuck all i guess. its all connected anyway. who fucking cares. (looks it up) So that one of them can take a nap or something

dizzyghoast

disagrees on problems; disagrees on solutions: the enemy. avoid at all costs

agrees on problems; disagrees on solutions: rivals. potential for collaboration but only to a point

disagrees on problems; agrees on solutions: wild card. confusing. useful but not to be trusted

agrees on problems; agrees on solutions: anathema to life itself. kill on sight

redstonedust

magical girl shows are good because their attacks will be something like "super love sunshine friendship beam" but make no mistake, super love sunshine friendship beam WILL end you. super love sunshine friendship beam will leave a crater in the ground where you once stood. you cannot understimate the power of super love sunshine friendship beam.

blastovkatamarinecromancy

super love sunshine friendship beam violates the Geneva Convention

bailesu

thepillarsofmarsandvenus

#magical girl lyrical nanoha #Nanofate #Get befriended idiot #Youtube

captain-price-returns

oh no they’re going to start calling democrats the same thing they’ve been calling democrats for 20 years now

hotvampireadjacent

thewellofastarael

"Here’s a trick I learned during the Obama presidency for handling certain types of political labels. Take, as an example, the Tea Party claim that Obama is a Communist. Don’t take the word of the person making the claim (Tea Partiers). Don’t rely on the rebuttal of the target (Obama), because that will just be dismissed. Go to the group itself (Communists) and ask them. Ask an actual Communist if Obama is a comrade and see how they answer. Watch as they laugh at you, then explain in great detail how they wish there was a Communist in the White House, but here’s a long and exhaustive list of why that just isn’t so. Now apply this logic to the claim that Hillary is pretty much the same as a Republican. Ask an actual Republican if they think Hillary Clinton is one of them. Watch them laugh, and then explain in the same exhausting detail why that just isn’t so. Some of them might concede that she’s better than Trump, but that’s not the same thing. Finally, go ask a White Supremacist if Trump is one of them. As they excitedly explain how Trump is the guy they’ve been waiting for all these years, and how he’s really empowered their movement, use this to guide how you will be voting in November."

Source: a 2016 facebook posts by Craig Enan, since then deleted (OG link here)

finally-figured-it-out

There was a young man from Peru

Whose limericks stopped at line two

finally-figured-it-out

There once was a man from Verdun

genteelblackhole42

There once was a man from the sticks Whose limericks stopped at line six. They were fine till line five Then they took quite a dive — But the problem is easy to fix If you just ignore the last line, it doesn't even follow the rhyme scheme oh god I've really lost control of this thing I'm so sorry...

shredsandpatches

There once was a man

From Cork who got limericks

And haiku confused.

ruckuscauser

There once was a man from the sticks

Who liked to compose limericks

But he failed at the sport

Because he wrote them too short

rat-girl-big-tits

@limerickshere

fremedon

There once was a fellow named Dan, Whose poetry never would scan. When told this was so, He replied, "Yes, I know-- It's because I try to squeeze as many syllables into the last line as I possibly can."

paulgadzikowski

On Tumblr did lasses and lads Their way with fail poetry had. You're having your fun But you're fooling no one - It takes skill to do something this bad.

lunetta-suzie-jewel

my name is cow

and when i see

this tumblr post

it gives me glee

i think real hard

for words to pick

so i can fail

at limerick

mrvelocipede

There once was a [person] from [place],

Whose [body part] was [special case].

When [event] would occur,

It would cause [him or her]

To violate [law of time/space].

hymneminium

#oh my god did gallagher just discover the term dank this is so exciting #does he know it's a weed thing?? there's no way right

Of course Peter Gallagher knows that "dank" is a weed thing. He also knows that "in heat" is a sex thing and that when aliens "probe" someone it's in the anus.

These are words, not things. Heathcliff is a comic about symbols.

You're never going to get a comic where an alien actually probes someone any more than you're going to get a comic where the Man-Eating Giant eats a man. You're just going to get a dozen comics where aliens like the word "probe".

Heathcliff wears the ham helmet because it's the helmet you wear when you eat a ham. You can tell it's that helmet because it says "ham" on it. The helmet's function is determined not by its form but by its label.

summer = beach = sand = desert = mummy and thus there is the Summer Mummy. Because of symbolic associations that do not otherwise cohere.

Robots don't wear clothes but the mere act of labeling them "nude" makes them nude. And once a painting is a nude painting there has to be a fig leaf because a "nude" without a "figleaf" is "indecent".