Progress Notes

Proud R.N. of the Philippines. Passive aggressive pacifist.

[bulbasaur-propaganda]

Imagine getting lost in woods then you find a Bulbasaur trying to help you 

[silk101]

[chessys]

cough thats my post

[craigdrake]

O'Ren silkscreen print

[craigdrake]

Cat Woman

[melissachaib]

[poetic-pics]

Fear…

[wow-david]

My parrot has a vague understanding of the word “no.” He knows to stop doing what he’s doing when he hears it, and he knows how to say it.

He knows it’s a word that is used when he’s doing something he shouldn’t be doing. However, being told “no” doesn’t make him stop doing it in future.

If he’s ever out of my sight or if I’m not paying attention, I know exactly when he’s doing something bad.

Because he says “no” to himself as he does it.

[anxietyproblem]

[kpfun]

Disney Princesses in casual wear

[awwcutepets]

Good friends build you up

[lilsugarbush]

[geekdawson]

one of the more valuable things I’ve learned in life as a survivor of a mentally unstable parent is that it is likely that no one has thought through it as much as you have. 

no, your friend probably has not noticed they cut you off four times in this conversation. 

no, your brother didn’t realize his music was that loud while you were studying. 

no, your bff or S.O. doesn’t remember that you’re on a tight deadline right now.

no, no one else is paying attention to the four power dynamics at play in your friend group right now.  

a habit of abused kids, especially kids with unstable parents, is the tendency to notice every little detail. We magnify small nuances into major things, largely because small nuances quickly became breaking points for parents. Managing moods, reading the room, perceiving danger in the order of words, the shift of body weight….it’s all a natural outgrowth of trying to manage unstable parents from a young age. 

Here’s the thing: most people don’t do that. I’m not saying everyone else is oblivious, I’m saying the over analysis of minor nuances is a habit of abuse. 

I have a rule: I do not respond to subtext. This includes guilt tripping, silent treatments, passive aggressive behavior, etc. I see it. I notice it. I even sometimes have to analyze it and take a deep breath and CHOOSE not to respond. Because whether it’s really there or just me over-reading things that actually don’t mean anything, the habit of lending credence to the part of me that sees danger in the wrong shift of body weight…that’s toxic for me. And dangerous to my relationships. 

The best thing I ever did for myself and my relationships was insist upon frank communication and a categorical denial of subtext. For some people this is a moral stance. For survivors of mentally unstable parents this is a requirement of recovery. 

[animalsnaps]

Dog snaps

[gaypeopletwitter]

[fenty-rihanna]

Would you ever do a housewives [The Real Housewives] show?

[cwote]

take care of yourself today and every day :)

[baeduan]

“We have calcium in our bones, iron in our veins, carbon in our souls, and nitrogen in our brains. 93 percent stardust, with souls made of flames, we are all just stars that have people names.” — Nikita Gill