[ampervadasz]

Best game

[cloudfreed]

I LOVE this game because it’s like 7-8 people all participating in a game to entertain ONE big dog and that’s amazing

[sixmonthsandgone]

this show is everything

[what-even-is-thiss]

Me: *rolls up to a merchant in ancient Athens on Heelys and sipping a Starbucks*

Me: Yo where’s your horribly dense wine I’ve got coin

Merchant: What on earth are you wearing

Me: It’s called pants.

Merchant: I hate that.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Me: *struts up to an Inca temple in bright green sunglasses*

Me: Hey guy of knowing stuff what do you know can I see your dead kings

Ancient Inca man: Are you sent from the gods to annoy me

Me: Nope, I’m doing this for free.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Me: *banging pots and pans in the street in the middle of the Mali empire*

Me: WHERE’S THE SALT???

Random passerby: What is a European doing this far south

Other rando: Yelling about salt apparently.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Me: *walks into the Song Dynasty with a backpack and a hydro flask*

Me: Hey have you guys invented paper money yet?

Woman washing clothes: What are you talking about? Who are you?

Me: *takes a sip of my Ancient Greek wine I’m keeping in my hydro flask* Do you have paper money?

Woman: I suppose?

Me: Sweet. *walks off*

[what-even-is-thiss]

Me: *struts onto a Polynesian canoe in a Star Wars t-shirt*

Me: What do you guys eat on these things? Fish?

Sailor: What the f*ck are you and where did you come from we’re in the middle of the ocean

Me: Can I have that fruit

Sailor: No. Absolutely not.

Me: Fair. *jumps overboard with my hydro flask*

[what-even-is-thiss]

Me: *sitting on top of a building during the beheading of Marie Antoinette*

Me: *pulls a bag of popcorn and some peasant bread out of my backpack*

Roof climbing child: Who are you?

Me: Someone on a roof. *hands them some bread*

Child: Why are you dressed like that?

Me: Because I can.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Me: *arrives home totally plastered*

Friend: You know you’re supposed to water down that kind of wine right

Me: *throws bread at them* It was the Song Dynasty. I was right. Frick you.

[what-even-is-thiss]

[fakedick]

I’m still shook, even now at 5am on a Thursday, over what I witnessed a few days ago in the Barnes & Noble Starbucks. Absolutely shook.

Two grown-ass men, obviously friends but dressed like they were in two different high school cliques, were arguing, passionately about who Gerard Way was. The one wearing a Green Lantern shirt and thick-rimmed hipster glasses said that Gerard Way is the lead singer of My Chemical Romance. The other guy was wearing what I wore during my emo phase in middle school, mostly black with a skinny red tie and a grey vest, was arguing that Gerard Way was a comic book writer.

Then a third person comes up, obviously another friend as she put down a tray of drinks for the three of them, looking like she could’ve been a Kappa Nu with Elle Woods, and asks “What dumb thing are you two arguing about now?”

The two men reply. Elle Woods’ sorority sister says “They’re the same damn person, you idiots. He does both things.”

Absolutely shook. I feel like I witnessed the utopia suggested by the end of High School Musical where everyone from all the different cliques are friends and Wildcats or some shit…

[cheaphalloweencostume]

today the barista at Starbucks accidentally gave me a trienta instead of a venti (which was cool cause hey more coffee) and I pointed it out in case she wanted to switch it so she doesn’t get in trouble or something and she looked right at me in my eyes and said “I decide what you drink now”

[antiandrogen]

When you set foot in my store I become judge jury and executioner

[swolizard]

The reason some girls wear make up..

[morebuttermorebetter]

Ive…. missed this video… i feel… replenished

[champagne-zaddy]

This refueled my energy

[artsyasfuckk]

a mood

[catchymemes]

Credit: @notlikethecar

[feijoaaas]

i hope this was posted literally two minutes ago because this needs about 500k notes stat

[filmnoirsbian]

Thanos, a philosophy and economics double major who thinks once you eat a plant it will never grow back: i have to slaughter half the universe’s population with the infinity stones, so that no one ever runs out of resources and starves

Thor, a phys ed and linguistics major with a minor in women’s studies, taking a sip of his strawberry protein shake: can’t you just use the infinity stones to create more resources tho?

Thanos: blocked

[sunny-dayze]

Thor: Unblock me I need to tell you something

Thanos: What?

Thor: Bitch

[everythingfox]

HAPPY HOPS

[ladyydisdain]

Shakespeare Plays as Brooklyn Nine-Nine Gifs

Hamlet:

Romeo and Juliet:

A Midsummer Night’s Dream:

Macbeth:

Much Ado About Nothing:

Julius Caesar:

Richard III:

Twelfth Night:

The Tempest:

[goldnpoc]

[natureandbeauty]

[infoglute]

what if

[thingonthedoorstep]

[pr1nceshawn]

The Best ATM Withdrawal Defense

[alexanders-archives]

I’m here for women with powerful dogs!

[urocyonfox-deactivated20210104]

My land lady is a 90lb 88 year old woman with 5 full grown Rottweiler boys. They sit around her when she gardens and watch her like the secret service. If you show up to pay rent they all stand up and stand between you and her.

It’s intimidating to have 5 pony size boys all staring at you until she stands up realizes it’a you and walks to you.

My favorite part is she wades through them like swamp water saying in her cute old voice ‘move’ ‘move please’ and each one she nudges to move wags his whole body at her touch and stumbles out of the way like he’s been knocked over by a truck. It gives me life paying my rent.

[dreamhousetogo]

The Dashi at Cabinscape

[maybe-if-one-day]

““Too busy” is a myth. People make time for the things that are really important to them.”

—