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@thewillowsraven-blog
Unearthing Your Inner Warrior started on Monday. Changing up my business and allowing it to become so aligned with who I am feels hard and terrifying and satisfying all at the same time. Do what you love people. You won't regret it.
Burning bones. Leaving behind all that no longer serves. Creating space for all that does. So grateful to those who showed up and walked this path with me. Now, time to look ahead. Crowning Glory here I come. #magicandtarot #burningoldbones #collectingbones #tarotjourney #lessonsofmajorarcana #timetohealthecrownchakra #crowningglorychakracourse #crownchakrawork https://www.instagram.com/p/BulhsK5jg55/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1pw5iabe9dpa3
Canada Post workers are on strike, but they are rotating locations.Ā Ā Mail sevice is continuing, but it will be slower.Ā Ā Save 10% in the shop right now because waiting feels hard.Ā Ā
#etsy #etsyseller #spiritdoll #altardoll #hematite #spiritwarrior #handmade
2018 will go down as the year I needed space.
Physical space.
Emotional space.
Head clearing space.
Spiritual space.
Heart space.
Space in my body and house and brain and inner everything.
I swear the world gets angrier and louder every single day. I get it. So much of the current rage makes sense. Suppressed pain becomes rage and rage rises because we cannot suppress our pain forever.
Mine rose this week. It was loud and angry and frustrated and fed up.
Perfectionists donāt do well with this by the way. Neither do those who have spent a lifetime committed to the suppressing of their feelings because they canāt ever seem to express them in a way that others understand or approve of or are comfortable with.
When you suck at feelings and express them in ways that you believe are wrong, the accompanying feelings of shame will consume you.
I didnāt write you last week because everything was falling apart and I knew I would say the wrong thing or do the wrong thing, and I donāt have the emotional bandwidth to handle that on another level in another place. I had already unloaded so much that felt wrong in other spaces I simply avoided doing it here.
Perception is a weird thing.
Sometimes people see us so clearly, yet other times they are so far off you wonder if they even know you at all.
I look far ahead into the future because everywhere I look I see messages and reminders I am supposed to know where I am going. We live in a goal oriented task driven world that glorifies busyness and productivity and achievement.
There isnāt much room for the failures of the world, even though on some level all 7 billion of us are failures. Some who self glorify their successes have failed on a human level they fail to acknowledge because they donāt value humanity.
I made myself a promise last night to measure my success in life based on how closely I live my truth. A dear friend reminded me yesterday of my love for A Course In Miracles, and familiar words found me in my darkest place offering words that felt like light.
We are never upset for the reason we think.
I am not upset because 2018 has been a shit show. On some level every year is one, letās face it. I am upset because like so many others I see my mistakes and missteps through the lens of fear. Fear of not being good enough or worthy enough or smart enough or kind enough or patient enough.
When we do this, we project that fear onto others. We become convinced that someone else has what we want because they took it from us. We believe if they have it we canāt because there isnāt enough to go around. That we are destined to be left out or left behind. We project that pain onto those we blame when taking responsibility becomes too much, when the internalized shame threatens to destroy us.
Until we learn to accept our failings with the same love we have for our successes, we are destined to repeat this.
Donāt believe me?
When was the last time you yelled at someone you werenāt mad at because you were really frustrated with a mistake you made that you didnāt want to own up to?
We used to call this āKicking the catā. You fight with your kid because you forgot to set your alarm and you are running late and you get to work and your boss is an ass and your clients are rude and traffic is horrible and dinner burns and you storm off in anger but the cat gets in the way so you kick it even though you arenāt mad at the cat.
You are mad at yourself for forgetting the alarm. You are ashamed for yelling at a kid for what you did. You are angry that on your worst days those around you seem to be at their worst too.
When was the last time you sat with your shame and loved yourself through it? Not ate your way through it or binge watched Netflix through it or drank your way through it. Not argued with social media bots paid to upset you and feed that anger hiding your shame way through it. Not popping pills to numb your way through it either. Just sitting alone with a journal or pillow and feeling your way through it with tears and compassion and self love.
I am on the hunt for a new planner for 2019, and I asked my Facebook friends for help. A friend recommended a planner that has the word Nourish in it.
Good Lord.
I love that word. I am contemplating it for 2019 because I need it so very desperately in my own life. And I thought about this course and the way I want you to feel during and after, and oh my goddess that is the feeling I am going for.
Nourished.
You will love yourself more and soften around your edges and learn boundaries and guard your energies and create space within your body and spirit and life, but loves you are going to feel nourished.
And when you are nourished by your own words and actions and heart, you stop projecting your pain and denials and fears onto the world around you.
You become one less person throwing darts blindfolded.
You focus on what you want, you stand for something real, and you own your true self like a boss because you know your worth is not determined by how perfect you are.
Class begins on Monday. Our circle is gathering and it is beautiful and the space I am creating will hold you and you will feel loved and nourished as you sit with yourself and take a good hard look in the mirror.
You will be surrounded with love as you learn to accept the things you cannot change and find the courage to change those that you can. You will have a soft place to land when you see your shadows and want to run. You will have arms to hold you when your shame shows its face. You will have others to rejoice with you when you share your gifts and talents and brilliance. You will have a circle to become the container to help hold your joy.
That is what we will do. Together.
Because no matter what you think, you are never truly alone.
When the noise of the world around me is too much, I turn to the peace of the river again and again. #naturelovers #naturalbeauty#riverwalkreflections #waterprayers#waterhealsthesoul #watermeditations#feathers #angelfeather #waterwitch#heartmedicine #watermagic #grateful#thankyougaia #mamaearth
And so it begins. Newsletter has been written and sent. "Unconditional" has been officially launched, and is now open for registration. My daughter brought me home a tea. My husband called on his lunch just to say hi. The Sun is shining, the leaves are changing, and construction is almost done. I am so grateful I can just sit for a few minutes and let it all be. #kickassgratitudesnewsletter#betterlatethannever #unconditional #breathe#october #musings #ramblingsofaninsomniac
I don't take selfies. Ever. But I can't preach unconditional self love if I don't practice it. In the midst of battling lighting and background noise on a laptop that was quiet before I tried filming, I caught a glimpse of myself on the screen and for the first time in a long time I saw someone I loved being. Someone worth loving. Tired and sick and cold and messy but still worth loving. This is what up at 3 a.m in a cold house with wet hair and an uncooperative laptop looks like. What waiting looks like. Waiting for the part to arrive so we can fix the furnace and warm this old cold house up. Waiting for paperwork and doctor's appointments and help for my youngest looks like. What waiting for a laptop to stop rattling so I can finally finish filming that video looks like. What waiting for a throat to heal looks like. What stubborn looks like. What not quitting looks like. What a lot of years on this planet trying to do better looks like. This is what my unconditional looks like. #spiritwarrior #truthteller #unmasked#coldhouseproblems #octoberlove#unconditional #trying #selflovejourney#reallybadselfie #walkingthelabyrinthwithin#hotteaplease #dearuniversepleasehurry#2018pleasegetbetter
Through the Fire
Sitting at the crossroads of life and death knowing things will be taken I donāt want to let go of. Knowing this business might be one of them. Wondering when I cross the threshold to the other side what will be left in the ashes to rise from. 2018 has taken more than it gave, and that trend continues even now. I laughed yesterday so hard that I cried, and I am struggling to remember the last time that happened. I used to have charm and wit and snark and sarcasm, and I am grieving all of that and more as I look in the mirror at the stranger reflected back to me.
Who is she?
She is serious because she has to be, as the uncertainties of a reality she never asked for crumble down around her and she watches everything she thought she ever wanted burn to the ground. Blue Aventurine for surrender because God knows she doesnāt want to. Pietersite for willpower because giving up and letting go are not the same things. Elm flower essence for the overwhelm of this world, this life, this existence. Sage to clear a space of the ugliness that lurks in the atmosphere unseen yet destructive. Nag Champa to remind me to breathe so deeply I find the sacred pause and float around in the safe comfort it provides before the exhale reminds me of the question I really want to ask but canāt and wonāt because I donāt think I want to know the answer. And I think of my journal and the gratitudes I will place there later with care because I need them somewhere safe right now. Because saying them out loud shines a light on them, and I donāt know what I would do if the Universe came for them too.
Itās easy to love yourself when life is flowing and joyful and light. 2018 hasnāt offered me that. It has forced me to walk through loss and grief and fear and uncertainty and sorrow to see if I could love myself there too. I will be different when I cross through the fire to the other side. My ashes will look different, feel different, be different. I hope I laugh again. I hope my snark and wit and quirkiness find their way back to me. I hope I find ways to connect and create again. I hope I land in a community that loves and has hopes and and dreams and believes in magic.
In the meantime I will wait for the postal strike to end so I can offer dolls to other warrior spirits who too have walked through fire and been burned and kept going anyway. Ā I will write prompts about loving yourself without strings and honoring your bodies and remembering your spirit, and I will hope they change you as they have me. Ā I will call forth the elements and allow them to heal me as I walk through the dark tunnel of grief. Ā I will pray for tears and relief because seriously sometimes we really are given more than we can handle.
I will light a candle in the hopes that the Universe can see me and find me and meet me in the fire and save the very best parts of me.
Because somewhere along the way this year I fell in love with who I really am, and I want her back so desperately I donāt know what I will do if I lose her for good.
Be kind to yourself. Ā Show up for yourself.
And if you too are feeling alone and lost in the fire, light a candle and we will find you and help you through it.
Because that is what we are supposed to do for one another.
And I donāt care what colour your skin is or what gender you are or who you love or what God you pray to or if you even have one at all.
I just care about you.
Hang in there loves. Ā Just hang on.
What people think witchcraft is like: ah yees, a heart of a wherewolf with a severe pollen allergy, a hoof clipping of a wild boar with a crescent moon marking, and what elseā¦ Ah, yees. Canāt forget the nostril hairs of a cocaine-addicted politician. Perrrrfect *rubs hands together menacingly*
What itās really like: *covers penny in dirt lovingly, then stands up and stares down for awhile before ultimately getting frustrated that it isnāt turning into a money tree* ā¦ GROW BITCH, IāM BROKE
šæš
Me: *Does a tarot reading for myself*
Tarot: *tells me what I absolutely didnāt want to know*
Me: ā¦how can I interpret this to my advantage
Relatable.
Spiritual Burnout: Tips and Reminders
Spiritual burnout is very similar to a creative blockage. Maybe youāre not seeing the results you want or you are feeling lost in your practice.
Maybe itās time to focus on grounding yourself.
Get your hands in the dirt.
Walk barefooted in the grass.
Admire the reflections of a cup of coffee sipped in the sunlight.
Cook a meal for you or your family or friends.
Drink water.
Open a window.
The beauty is how simply you can reconnect with energy.
Dormancy
Like a bear hibernates in the winter, a wise practitioner knows the power in dormancy.
Giving rest to your mind may help you again flourish creatively.
Even when you arenāt being ritualistic, the power is still there. The slumbering bear does not lose its natural will to seek energy when Spring arrives. If anything it is hungrier in its pursuit.
Attunement
Seasons change and so must we.
You may never feel the same way about your craft from day to day, but feel free to explore new ideas as you grow.
The time of the year may dictate what activities are viable to some extent. Sleet and snow may keep you indoors, but house plants may stir reminders of the cycle of the year and offer you a simple way to reconnect to the spirit of nature.
K.I.S.S
āKeep it simple, stupid!ā
Fostering your spiritual growth during times you feel inundated with schedules, events, or work should be simple.
It is OK to take a break from the norm to recharge by doing something simple.
Donāt complicate things for yourself.
Especially if you are returning to your practice after some time.
Go back to the basics. Read materials you havenāt perused recently.
You may be pleasantly surprised by your viewpoint today versus that which you held previously.
Inspiration does not die, it is merely waiting for your attention.
So much this.
Isnāt this room perfect? š®šš
Need.
