[imsoofuckingsad-deactivated2018]

murderer: any last words

me: do u think i’m cute be honest

[rohirric-hunter]

"You could get up early and do it before work" I could also wait for a magic beanstalk to start growing in my living room LMAO. Let's focus on things that happen in the real world

[the-big-mood]

When you’re so good at your job that you accidentally become everyone’s source of happiness. [X]

[rosedavid]

i hate it when you're heating something up in the microwave and it starts to go snap crackle pop so you take it out but it's still completely cold. shut up then??

[80sanime]

[segamascott]

[eggdropsoupe-deactivated2016050]

[dogpuppy]

[dragon-in-a-fez]

the thing that really cheeses my cake about flies getting in my house is they clearly don't want to be there anyway. like at least the ants trying to steal cereal from my pantry had a goal and a plan. you are just here because you're too stupid to use a window twice

[loveridden1999]

[what-even-is-thiss]

“Cats don’t actually love you”

A cat is a small creature in the middle of the food chain that is fully aware that you are a very large thing that could stomp its head in at any moment and yet it chooses to rest its tiny little head on your leg for a nap and spreads out on the floor near you exposing its belly and its most sensitive organs. It brings dead mice and bugs to you to share food.

Don’t you get it? This tiny thing trusts you. It wants to help you too. It licks your leg thinking that it’s helping. It kneads on you to find comfort. It shares its body warmth with you in the cold and gives you your space in the heat. It hisses at other mammals it sees outside including other cats in an effort to protect its family.

Cats love you so so much. But they will keep trying to eat plastic.

[belokhvostikova]

[proceduralbob]

I needed to record this because r/perth is having a regular one today

[dailyflicks]

The Crow (1994) dir. Alex Proyas

[hypedogs]

[ladyshinga]

[gameandwatch-deactivated2013102]