aaaaa

[thoraway125]

almost every song Sara Quin has recommended

A Playlist

AFI

A Flock Of Seagulls- I Ran

Again Me!- Boyfriend

AHOHNI- Drone Bomb Me

Alex Lahey- You Don’t Think You Like People Like Me

Allison Crutchfield- Dean’s Room

Allison Weiss- Runaway

All Of This- Perera Elsewhere

ALMA- Chasing Heights

Alvvays

Alycia Keys- Try Sleeping with A Broken Heart

Ani DiFranco

Annie Lennox

An Horse

Animal Collective - Merriweather Post Pavilion  

Bangles

ASTR- Operate

Atari Teenage Riot

A Tribe Called Red- R.E.D

Austra- I Love You More Than You Love Yourself Babes in Toyland

Bancks- Gemini Feed

Baths

Baybee- Jay Som

Beach House- Sparks, Lemon Glow

Bebe Rexha- Meant to Be

Bec Sandridge- In the Fog, in the Flame

Ben Folds

Betty Who- You Can Cry Tomorrow

Beyonce- Lemonade

Bikini Kill

Billy Idol- Mony Mony 

Bleached- Wednesday Night Melody, Can You Deal?, Flipside

Bleachers- Don’t Take The Money

BLK- My Hood - Stormzy

Blood Orange- You're Not Good Enough, It Is What It Is 

Bob Marley

Body- Julia Jacklin 

Bone thugs and Harmony

Bon Jovi- wanted dead or alive, you give love a bad name 

Bowie

Britta Phillips- Mistress America

Broken Social Scene- Hug of Thunder, Almost Crimes Bruce Springsteen- Im on Fire, Dancing in the Dark, The River, Live 1975-85 (this particular version https://youtu.be/gg3DleXrT-o) Bryan Adams

Bjork- I've seen it all 

Buck 65- Square Two

Cake

Carrie Brownstein

Caribou- Can’t Do Without You

Cassie- Me & U

Chairlift- Romeo

Charli XCX- Track 10

Charlotte Day Wilson- Work

Chloe x Halle0 Drop

Christine and The Queens- iT, Saint Claude 

Chris Walla

CHVRCHES

Classixx- Borderline

City and Colour

Cold Specks

Collide- Krasnoyarsk

Corey Hart- Sunglasses At Night

Couer de Pirate

Cyndi Lauper- The Goonies Are Good Enough, Time After Time

Cypress Hill

Dallas Green

Death Cab for Cutie 

Debbie Wiseman- Wolf Hall

DEDE- Faultline (Single Edit)

Deradoorian- A Beautiful Woman

DIANA- Confession, Perpetual Surrender

Dinosaur Jr

DJDS- Trees On Fire

Dolly Parton

Doveman

Drake- No Tellin Dream- Love/Hate

Diana- Perpetual Surrender

Electrelane - Rock It to the Moon, no shouts no calls

Empress Of- How Do You DO It

Emylia Argan

Erasure

Eugene Francis Jnr

Everything but the Girl

Fatima Al Qadiri- Hip Hop Spa, Szechuan

Feist- Pleasure album

Fever Ray- Mustn’t Hurry

First Aid Kit

FKA Twigs- Good To Love

Four Tet

Francis and the Lights- May I Have This Dance

Frankie Cosmos- Sinister, Accommodation 

Frank Ocean Thinking About You

Friends- I'm His Girl 

FUN Fugazi

Future Islands- Ran

George Hill

Gilligan Moss- It Felt Right

Girlpool- Chinatown

Glass Animals

Gogol Bordello 

Gossip

Green Day

Grimes- Flesh Without Blood

Grizzly Bear

HAIM- Want You Back

Halsey- Now Or Never

HANA

Hank Williams

Hannah Georgas- Don’t Go, Needed Me

Hayley Kiyoko- Girls Like Girls

Hole

Holly Miranda

Hot Hot Heat

IDER- Face On

Jack Johnson

James Ilha

Jamie xx- Girl

Japanese Breakfast- Machinist

Jeremih- Pass Dat

Joanna Newsom - Have One On Me 

John Hopkins- I remember

Johnny Cash

Joni Mitchell

John Hopkins- Abandon Window, I remember

Jonathan Coulton

Justin Bieber- Purpose, Runaway Love Justin Timberlake-  FutureSex/LoveSounds Kaki King

Kate Bush

Katy Perry- Chained To The Rhythm

Kathryn Bostic- Love Theme

Kelela- Rewind- Sporting Life Remix

Kieran Hebden & Steve Reid - The Exchange Session, Vol. 2

Kelly Lee Owens- Birds

K.Flay- Black Wave

Kid Cudi- The Commander

Kieran Hebden & Steve Reid - The Exchange Session, Vol. 2

Kimya Dawson- So Nice So Smart

Kinnie Starr

Korn

KraftWork

KT Tunstall- Hard Girls

Kygo- It Ain’t Me (with Selena Gomez)

Kylie Minogue

Lapsley- Hurt Me

LCD Soundsystem- Tonite

Leonard Cohen- Came So Far For Beauty

Leo Kalyan- Fucked Up

Led Zeppelin

Light Asylum- Shallow Tears

Lily Allen 

Lorde- Green Light

Lou Reed- Satellite of Love

Lowell

Lower Dens- To Die in LA, Real Thing

Lucius- My Heart Got Caught On Your Sleeve 

Lupa J- Numb

Neil Young

New Found Glory

New Kids on the Block

New Order

New Skin- Torres

No Shouts No Calls

Nick Jonas- Jealous

Nicolas Jaar- No

Night Terrors

Nirvana

Noname 

Nothing to be Frightened of by Julian Barnes

Now Now

Madonna- Holiday

Majid Jordan (ft Drake)- My Love

Mapei- Don’t Wait

Mariah Carey

Matthew Dear

Melissa Etheridge

Mica Levi- Death

Michelle Branch- Hopeless Romantic

Mike Elizondo

Milli Vanilli - Blame It On the Rain

Miriam Culter- Ethel Main Title

Mitski

Montaigne- Because I Love You

Moonriser- I’m Not Something Special

Moses Sumney- Doomed

Mother Mother

MUNA- Winterbreak, I Know A Place, About You album

Mykki Blanco- Loner

My Bloody Valentine

My Midnight Heart

My So Called Life

Paramore- After Laughter, Told You So

Passion Pit

Paul Williams

Peaches

Porches- Anymore, Be Apart

Partner Band- In Search of Lost Time

Patsy Cline

Pattern Against User 

Perera Elsewhere- All of This

Perfume Genius- Slip Away

Phantogram- Answer 

Pheonix- J-Boy

Phil Collins- Groovy Kind of Love

Post Pavillon

Prince- I Could Never Take the Place of Your Man, Little Red  Corvette

PWR BTTM- I Wanna Boi

Q Tip

Rachel Cantu

Rachel Portman- Vianne Sets Up Shop

Ra Ra Riot

RAY BLK- My Hood

REM- Sweetness

Ria Mae- Ooh Love

Richard Marx- Right here waiting

Rihanna- Russian Roulette, Umbrella, Higher, Love On The Brain

Robyn- Do it Again, Love is free (moon boots remix) 

Rolling Stones

Röysksopp- Something in my Heart

Rufus Wainwright

Ruth B- If This is Love Ryan Adams

Santigold

Samphaaa- Process Album 

Sample- Blood on Me

Shamir- If It Wasn’t True 

Sharon Van Etten- Everytime The Sun Comes Up

Serena Ryder- Electric Love

Shondells

Shura- What’s It Gonna Be?

Simple Minds- All The Things She Said

Sinead O’Connor

Siya- Automatic

Smashing Pumpkins- Siamese Dream

Snailmail- Thinning

SNAP!- Rhythm Is A Dancer - 7” Edit

SOHN- Hard Liquor

Solange- Mad

Spoon- They Way We Get By

Speak

Steel Train

Stereogum

Stevie Nicks

St. Vincent, Actor

Supertramp

Supreme

Taylor Swift- 1989

Teenage Fanclub

The Bangles

The Beaches

The Black Keys

The Courtneys

The Cranberries- Dreams on My So Called Life

The Dream- Love Hate, Love vs Money

The Enemy- Bigger Cages, Longer Chains 

The Jezabels- Hurt Me

The Killers

The Lemon Twigs

The New Pornographers

Theophilus London

The Pretenders- 500 Miles The Police- Roxanne- I Could Never Take the Place of Your Man, Little Red Corvette The Ramones

The Reason

The Regrettes- Hey Now

The Rentals- The Man With Two Brains

The Replacements

The Smiths

The White Stripes

The xx- xx (2009), Say Something Loving

Thingamajig- Miya Folick 

Tracy Chapman- Fast Car

Tom Petty

Tom Cochrane

Tony Bennet

Too Attached 

Torres

Tove Styrke- Say My Name

Tragically Hip

Tribe Called Quest

U2 - Who's Gonna Ride Your Wild Horse

Us- Empress of

Vagabon- Fear & Force

Vector Xing- Bubble King

Vanbot- Collide, Krasnoyarsk, Not That Kind, Moscow Veckatimest Vivek Shraya- Part Time Woman

VHS or Beta

Violent Femmes 

Warpaint- Whiteout

Waters

Waxahatchee- Silver

Weavves

Weezer

When I’m with Him- Empress of

White Lung- Hungry. Kiss Me When I Bleed

Whitney houston- I look to you, million dollar bill, I will always love you

Wrabel- Bloodstain

Yaeji 

Yeah Yeah Yeahs

[thoraway125]

Every book/movie/show Sara Quin has recommended.

and some reviews at the bottom, not the ones on skq reads 

Books

Abandon Me by Melissa Febos

After the Tall Timber: Collected Nonfiction by Reneta Adler

Against Everything by Mark Grief

A Gate at the Stairs by Lorrie Moore

Air Guitar: Essays on Art & Democracy by Dave Hickey

Amazing Adventures of Kavalier & and Clay by Michael Chaboan

A Lover’s Discourse by Roland Barthes

A Moveable Feast by Ernest Hemingway 

A Natural History of the Senses by Diane Ackerman

*An Education by Susan Choi

*Anything That Moves, Dana Goodyear

*Are You My Mother? By Alison Bechdel

*Artful by Ali Smith

*A Sport and a Pastime by James Salter

Asymmetry by Lisa Halliday

Asterios Polyp by David Mazzucchelli 

Atmospheric Disturbances by Rivka Galchen

A Visit from the Goon Squad by Jennifer Egan

*A Widow for One Year by John Irving

A Zine Yearbook by Jason Kucsma

Barbarian Days Surfing Life by William Finegan

Bark by Lorrie Moore

Barney’s Version by Mortecai Richler 

Behind The Beautiful Forevers: Life, Death, and Hope in a Mumbai Undercity by Katherine Boo

Berlin Stories by Robert Walser

Borne by Jeff VadnerMeer

Bossy Pants by Tina Fey

Blood Horses by John Jeremiah Sullivan

By Blood by Ellen Ullman

By Grand Central Station by Elizabeth Smart

Call Me By Your Name by Andre Aciman

Can’t and Won’t by Lydia Davis 

Cats & Plants by Stephen Eichhorn

Changed my Mind by Zadie Smith

Cleopathra: A Life by Stacy Schiff

Colour by Icons by Never Apart

*Conversations With Friends by Sally Rooney 

Death & Co by Alex Day and more

Dept. of Speculation by Jenny Offill 

Diary of a Bad Year by J.M Coetzee

Don’t Get Too Comfortable by David Rakoff

Do What You Want by Ruby Tandoh

Dykes to Watch Out For by Alison Bechel

Einstein’s Dreams by Alan Lightman

Empire Of Illusion by Chris Hedges

Empty Nest End of Eddy by Edouard Louis

Epilectic by David Beauchard Essays Against Everything by Mark Grief

Essex County by Jeff Lemire

Everything Ravaged, Everything Burned by Wells Tower

*Far From the Tree by Andrew Solomon

Farther Away: Essays by Jonathan Franzen

Fear of Music by Jonathan Lethem

Feeding My Mother by Jane Arden

Fifteen Dogs by Andre Alexis 

*Flutter by Jennie Wood

Forty One False Starts by Janet Malcolms

Forgive Me if I’ve Told You This Before by Karelia Stetz Waters

Fosse by Sam Wasson

Fraud Essays by David Rakoff

Fun Home: A Family Tragicomic by Alison Bechel

Getting A Life: Stories by Helen Simpson

Girls in the Moon by Janet McNally

Go Ask Alice by Beatrice Sparks *Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn

Groomed by Jess Rona

*Habibi by Craig Thompson

Half Empty by David Rake

Helter Skelter by Curt Gentry and Vincent Bugliosi

Her Body And Other Parties by Carmen Machado

Here Comes the Sun by Nicole Dennis Benn

Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth the II by Christopher Warwick

*H is For Hawk by Helen Macdonald

*Hotel New Hampshire by John Irving

Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins

I Am a Camera by John Van Druten

I Love Dick by Chris Kraus

Important Artifacts and Personal Property from the Collection of Lenore Doolan and Harold Morries, Including Books, Street Fashion, and Jewelry by Leanne Shapton

*Independence Day by Richard Ford

Independent people by Halldor Laxness

Intimacy by Jean-Paul-Satre

I Pass Like Night by Jonathan Ames

I Want To Show You More by Jamie Quatro

Jamilti and Other Stories by Rutu Modan

Juliet Takes a Breath by Gabby Rivera 

*Kramers Ergot by Sammy Harkham

Krazy! By Bruce Grenville

Leaving the Atocha Station by Ben Lerner

*Let’s Explore Diabetes With Owls- David Sedaris

Let the Great World Spin by Colum McCann

*Light Years by James Salter

Likewise by Ariel Shrag

Little Fires Everywhere by Celeste Ng

Love Dishonor Marry Die Cherish Perish by David Rakoff

Love In Infant Monkeys by Lydia Millet

Making Nice by Matt Sumell 

Margaret Fuller: A New American Life by Megan Marshall

May We Be Forgiven by A.M Homes

Mean by Myriam Gurba

Me before You by Jojo Moyes

Monkey Grip by Helen Garner

Mother of All Questions by Rebecca Solnit Music for Torching by A.M Homes

*My Education by Susan Choi

My Father’s Tears and Other Stories by John Updike

My Lifte in France, Julia Child and Alex Prud’homme

My Misspent Youth by Meghan Daum

Mourning Diary by Roland Barthes

My Struggle by Karl One Knausgaard

My Struggle 2 by Karl One Knausgaard

Mythologies by Roland Barthes

Nasty Woman by Heather McDaid

Netherland by Joseph O’Neill 

Nightfilm by Marisha Pessl

Nobody Is Ever Missing by Catherine Lacey

No Straight Lines: Four Decades of Queer Comics by Justin Hall

Notes on a Foreign Country by Suzy Hansen 

Nothing to be Frightened of by Julien Barnes

On Boxing by Joyce Carol Oates

Open City by Teju Cole

Opposite of Hate by Sally Kohn

*Paper Lantern: Love Stories by Stuart Dybek

Pauline Kael: A Life In The Dark by Brian Kellow

Paying For It by Chester Brown

*Pirates and Farmers by Dave Hickey

*Pitch Dark by Renata Alder

Political Fictions by Joan Didion

Polyamorous Love Song by Jacob Wren

Priestdaddy by Patricia Lockwood

*Provence 1970 by Luke Barr

Pulphead-Essays by John Jeremiah Sullivan

*Random Family by Adrian NicoleLeBlanc

Senselessness by Horacio Castellanos Moya

She believed she could so she did by Julie ‘Hesta Prynn’ Slavin

She of the Mountains by Vivek Shraya

Somebody with a Little Hammer by Mary Gaitskill

Speedboat by Renata Adler

Special Exits by Joyce Farmer

State of Wonder by Ann Patchet

Stoner by John Williams

Summertime by J.M Coetzee

Sweet Tooth by Jeff Lemire

Swing Time by Zadie Smith

**Tenth of December by George Saunders

That Summer Time Sound- Matthew Specktor (sara narrates a part in the audio version)

The Art of Fielding by Chad Harbach

The Association of Small Bombs by Karan Mahajan

The Best American Comics 2007 by Charles Burns

The Best American Nonrequired Reading 2009 by David Eggers

The Cement Garden by Ian McEwan

The Children of Palomar by Gilbert Hernandez

The City and the Pillar by Gore Vidal

The Birth House by Ami McKay

The Book of Laughter and Forgetting by Milan Kundera

The Dark Room by Susan Faludi

*The Days of Abandonment by Elena Ferrante

The Disappointment Artist by Jonathan Lethem

The Doors Of Perception and Heaven and Hell by Aldous Huxley

The Ecstasy of Influence: Nonfictions by Jonathan Lethem

The End of The Story by Lydia Davis 

The Essential Elle Willis by Ellen Willis

The Fight by Norman Mailer

*The Flamethrowers by Rachel Kushner

The Folded Clock by Heidi Julavits

The Forgotten Waltz by Anne Enright

The Goldfinch by Donna Tartt

*The Guest Cat by Takashi Hiraide

The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins 

The Idiot by Elif Batumam

The Informed Air by Muriel Spark

The Innovator’s Dilemma: When New Technologies Cause Great Firms to Fail by Clayton M. Christensen

The Interestings by Meg Wolitzer

*The Invention of Solitude by Paul Auster

The Irresponsible Self by James Woods

The Journalist and the Murderer by Janet Malcom

**The Last Word: Reviving the Dying Art of Eulogy by Julia Cooper 

The Little Red Chairs by by Edna O’Brien

The Man Without Qualities by Robert Musil

The Marriage Plot by Jeffrey Eugenides

The Missing Piece by Shel Silverstein

The Missing Piece Meets The Big O by Shel Silverstein 

The Moronic Inferno by Martin Amis

The Mother of All Questions by Rebecca Solnit

The Neopolitan Novels by Elena Ferrante

The Nobody by Jeff Lemire

The Noonday Demon: An Atlas of Depression by Andrew Solomon

The People in the Trees- Hanya Yanagihara

The Notebooks of Malte Laurid’s Brigge by Rainer Maria Rilke

The Price of Salt by Patricia Highsmith

The Property by Rutu Modan

The Remains of the Day by Kazuo Ishiguro

The Road by Cormac McCarthy

The Rules Do Not Apply by Ariel Levy

This life by Martin hagglund

The Sense Of An Ending by Julian Barnes

The Slow Man by J.M Coetzee

The Spirit catches you and you fall down by Anne Fadiman

The Sun Also Rises by Ernest Hemingway

The Topeka School by Ben Lerner65

The War Against Cliche by Martin Amis

The Yiddish Policemen’s Union by Michael Chabon

Things Are What You Make Of Them by Adam J. Kurtz

Thinking, Fast And Slow’ by Daniel Kahneman

*This is How You Lose Her by Junot Diaz

Those Who Leave and Those Who Stay by Elena Ferrante

To my Trans Sisters by Charlie Croggs 

Tranny by Laura Jane Grace 

True Stories by Helen Garner

Two Lives: Gertrude and Alice by Janet Malcolm 

Unless by Carol Shields

Versed by Rae Armantrout

Visiting Mrs. Nabokov by Martin Amis

Vitamin PH: New Perspectives in Photography by Rodrigo Alonso

Waiting for the Barbarians by J.M Coetzee

WACK! Art and The Feminist Revolution by Cornelia Butler

*Wake In Fright by Kenneth Cook

Wanderlust A History of Walking by Rebecca Saint

Ways of Seeing by John Berger

*We Are All Completely Besides Ourselves by Karen Joy Fowler

Whatever happened to Interracial Love by Kathleen Colleens 

What Happened by Hillary Rodham Clinton

What I Talk About When I Talk About Running by Haruki Murakami

When Things Go Missing by Kathryn Schulz

*White Girls by Hilton Als

Winter by Ali Smith

Women by Charles Bukowski

(Woman) Writer: by Joyce Carol Oates

Works of Love by Søren Kierkegaard

1Q84 by Haruki Murakami

*100 Essays I don’t Have Time To Write by Sarah Ruhl

-Any works written by Renata Adler, Edward Albee, Roland Barthes, Alison Bechel, Beverly Cleary, J.M Coetzee, Susan Faludi, David Hickey, Elena Ferrante, Stephen King, John Irving, Jeff Lemire, and Lorrie Moore, and David Rakoff, Anne Rice, Donna Tartt, and John Updike

Magazines  Harper’s Lapham’s Quarterly Rolling Stones SPIN The Believer (August 2003, September 2004, November 2004, October 2008, November/December 2008, March/April 2009, June 2009) The New Yorker 

Bookstores Drawn and Quarterly in Montreal Sam Wellers Zion in salt lake LA Strand Books  Housingworks Mcleods in Vancouver Powells

Sara wrote something short in ‘do what you want’ by ruby tandoh

also wrote the preface to jess rona’s book

Movies, Documentaries, Shows, Podcasts etc

Adventures in Babysitting 

Arrested Development

*Bachelorette

Beauty is EmbarrassingBlack Power Mix Tape

*Bojack Horsemen (same artist as the Hang On music video)Broadchurch

Brothers and Sisters

Brown Girls

Bugsy Malone

Call me By Your Name

Luca Guadagnino

Cameraperson by Kirsten Johnson

 *Charlie Rose

*ChungKing Express

*Dan Savage Lovecast

***DeadWood

Drinking Buddies

Fresh Air with Terry Gross

Friday Night Lights

Full House

Game of Thrones

GarfieldGolden Girls Goonies

*Holy Motors

Home ImprovementI

nside Out

In The Loop

Lake

Legion

Little Shop of Horrors

L.O.V.E (tv series)

Madmen

Milk 2008

Moonlight

Nashville

Neon Bull

Orange Is The New BlackPhantom of The Paradise Rocky Horror Picture Show Sense8ShamelessShort Cut because 1992 Julianne Moore

Simon Killer

Sopranos Talk

RadioSpeed the Plow by David Mamet

Still Processing

Terminator 2

Terry Gross Fresh air NPR

The Bridge

The Crown

The Fall

The Fugitive

The Leftovers

The Minipops

The Thick of It

The Office (UK)

The Property Brothers

The Real Housewives of (anywhere)

The Wire

*This American Life

Tom Petty- Running Down A Dream

 Trueblood

WALL-E

War of the Worlds

War Witch

Weiner-Dog

West Wing

2Dope Queens

13 Monkeys

30 Rock

and here’s some more book reviews from Sara

Outline

by Rachel Cusk

The truth is that I struggled to pick my favorite book or writing from Rachel Cusk. All three novels in her

Outline series

are fantastic, and I’ve reread each of them first with passion and then again with a studious eye. For me there is the lonely, yet pragmatic, keen observational protagonist that appeals to me deeply. But also, a woman traveling, forever on the receiving end of looping conversation with strangers. I find her writing extremely romantic. What I’d most like to include on this list, is a piece of her writing from the

New York Times Magazine

: "Making House: Notes on Domesticity." It is a perfect piece of writing about the struggle of making a home and living it in comfortably. “Like the body itself, a home is something both looked at and lived in, a duality that in neither case I have managed to reconcile. I retain the belief that other people’s homes are real where mine is a fabrication, just as I imagine others to live inner lives less flawed than my own.

 ”

Fire Sermon

by Jamie Quatro 

Jamie Quatro’s novel about devotion, longing, lust and god was impossible to put down. I read it in one giant gulp. While male writers are given ample opportunity to write about these ideas, it still feels rare and thrilling when women do.

 Sing, Unburied, Sing

by Jesmyn Ward

Everything Jesmyn Ward has written has haunted me afterward. Unblinking, brutal, heartbreaking stories. Her writing feels both modern and like something from a masterpiece that every student is meant to read in high school or college. 

The Topeka School

by Ben Lerner

I love a hook, a melody that on first listen gives you goosebumps, or makes your stomach lurch up to your throat. Sometimes I hear one and I think, “that is a smash,” and then settle in to envy that I didn’t write the song myself. That was the feeling I had reading

I couldn’t help but compare our memoir because both books center adolescence and high school at their core. While Ben writes dazzlingly about masculinity and violence and the bubbling rage of teenage boys, I thought about the way we wrote about the paralysis and fear of being a queer girl in that same kind of world. While his boys turn their rage outward, we focused our violence inward, on the most tender parts of ourselves. Ben’s writing opens a door to understanding something about my own experience of those adolescent years. He sheds light on the parents and teachers whose complicated lives indelibly haunt our own, in ways we don’t realize until we become adults. It seems much of our public conversation revolves around what to do about and with men,

The Topeka School is a thrilling response. All of that to say, I think Ben’s book is a smash. 

JUNE 3, 2009 1. The Flamethrowers by Rachel KushnerI was so captivated there was no choice but to finish it entirely in one long stretch of days. Passages so beautiful that I found myself re-reading them over and over again in amazement. I think it was in the Harpers Magazine review that they called it feminist and sexy. It’s true. An entirely fresh and inspiring heroine. 2. Light Years by James SalterSo many tears; on the tarmac, on the subway, tucked in my bus bunk. I will cherish this book forever. It is 40 years old and that made the discovery so much more powerful. It’s also a good reminder that I am sentimental and a romantic no matter how hard I try to resist those urges. I’ll cozy up with my tears any day, you can’t shame me! 3. Tenth of December by George SaundersThere aren’t very many writers with a body of work I love so completely.  But, I think this is my absolute favourite. I have total admiration/awe for a mind this strange and wonderful

[thoraway125]

Tegan and Sara’s Instruments and etc

Fun fact they used Chocolate Covered Sunflower Seeds for the shaker in ‘Back In Your Head’

Tegan’s stuff

Guitars

Art & Lutherie Ami Cedar (black)

Epiphone Coronet

Fender Acoustic (gloss sunburst)

Fender Stratocaster

Gibson Blues King

Gibson G6128TCG Duo Jet 

Gibson Les Paul (goldtop)

Gibson Les Paul Junior

Gibson Les Paul Studio Gold Series

Gibson Maestro

Gibson Melody Maker Special

Gibson Joan Jett Signature Melody Maker (white, w/Zebra humbucker)

Gibson SG Junior 60’s 

Martin X Series LX1E Little Martin Acoustic

P-90

Martin 00 Acoustics

Seagull Acoustics

Vintage Gibson Melody Maker (natural Mahogany)

Yamaha APX-3M

Pedals- Upper Row: Boss NS-2, OD-3, LS-2, and TU-2. Lower row: Ibanez TS-9, Boss CE-2, MXR M-133 MicroAmp, Boss DD5 and a Zvex Fuzz Factory. 

Boss SD-1, RV-5. TR-2, DD-3, TU-2s

Keyboards

Alesia Micron

Angel AX-25N2 Glockenspiel

MalletKAT

MicroKORG Synthesizer/Vocoder

Clavia Nord Electro 273

Roland Juno-G

Sequential Circuits Prophet- 5

Sequential Circuits 2

Amps

Acme Lulu head into Dr. Z closed back 1/12-inch cab (miked with Heil PR30)

Fender Hot Rod Deluxe Amps

Other

Dunlop Capos

Dunlop Nylon .73mm/.6mm picks

Couch Black Byloos

Gibson Masterbuilt Premium Phosphor Bronze Wound

Gibson Red Lightning Bolt strap

LP Shake-It Shakers

Ultra Feedback Buster

Victorian Strap

Sara’s stuff

Guitars

Art & Lutherie Ami Cedar (black)

Danelectro ’67 Dano Heaven Hawk Series (creme alligator)

Epiphone Les Paul

Fender Jaguar (olympic white finish) 1995

Fender Telecaster (sunburst)

Gibson Blues King

Gibson CJ165 (rosewood)

Gibson ES-335

Gibson Everly Brothers J-180 Acoustic 2005 (Chris Walla’s)

Gibson Les Paul Goldtop

Gibson Les Paul Junior Special P-90 (satin cherry)

Gibson SG Junior 60’s

Gibson SJ-300

Gretsch Duo (jet black)

Gretsch G6131MY Malcolm Young Signature II (the yellow one)

Gretsch Malcolm Young (red)

Martin X Series LX1E Little Martin Acoustic

P-90? idk this might go with ^

Martin 000M Acoustics

Regal RC-1 Duolian Resonator (Nickel Plated Steel or 2003 Polychrome Grey)

Takamine EAN30C

Vintage 1972 Fender Telecaster Thinline (black, w/Wide Range Humbuckers)

Pedals

Boss output selector; Liele input selector; Pro D2 stereo direct box; and Boss overdrive, chorus, reverb, delay and tuner out to amp.  Two DI’s, a dry DI signal. 

Keyboards

Alesia Micron

Angel AX-25N2 Glockenspiel

LP Shake-It Shakers

MalletKAT

MicroKORG Synthesizer/Vocoder

Clavia Nord Electro 273

Roland Juno-G

Sequential Circuits Prophet- 5

Sequential Circuits 2

Amps

Acme Lulu head into Dr. Z closed back 1/12-inch cab (miked with Heil PR30)

Fender Hot Rod Deluxe Amps

Other

mac tower

Protools rack

D'Addario strings

Dunlop Tortex Standard Guitar Picks 0.06mm

Dunlop Acoustic Guitar Capo

Dunlop Capos

G7th 405 Capo

Gibson Masterbuilt Premium Phosphor Bronze Wound

LP Shake-It Shakers

Planet Waves Delrin .61mm picks

Other band members

Edward ‘Ted’ Gowans Guitars

1975 Fender Stratocaster 1965 RI Jazzmaster E1 Moog Fender American Deluxe Tele Fender Jaguar Gibson ES-335 (satin finish) G&L ASAT Gretsch Malcolm Young (red) Martin Acoustics

Pedals Boss tuner, Zvex Super Hard On, Fulltone Fulldrive 2, Mosfet, Ibanez TS-9DX) Boss TU-2, LS-2, MXR Dyna Comp, Ernie Ball volume, Line 6 DL4, Voodoo Lab Pedal Power, Z.Vex Super Hard-On, Line 6 DL4, and vintage chorus and delay 

Keyboards Nord Wave synthesizer

Amp Acme Varsity, AC10 Shaun Huberts Bass

Fender Jazz (natural finish, maple, mother-of-pearl block inlays) Fender Jazz (sunburst finish, tortoise-shell pickguard, rosewood)

Pedals Ampeg SVT Classic rig, SVT-CL bass head with an SVT- 810E bass enclosure. Taurus 3 Bass Pedals

Theremin Etherwave Plus

Amp Amp SVT-CL head into SVT-810E cab and Eden World Tour 800 Head into Eden 410XLT cab

Johnny Andrews Drums a Yamaha Kit

Mics Shure MS91 and Yamaha Subkick (bass), Shure Beta57 (snare top), Neumann KM184 (snare bottom/hi-hat), Shure Beta56 (rack tom), Shure Beta52 (floor tom), two Audio-Technica AT4033s (overhead)

[thoraway125]

shitty quinlove headcannon?draft? snippet idk

In a Dexter Universe. Not finished or organized sorry, but I didn’t want to just delete it either so here. Flashback stuff?..........Walking home from school Tegan was dead tired, her bones aching from sitting in a chair all day and her head tired from equations. Starting their first high school year was hard. The backpack full of textbooks weighed heavily on her small stature. Unlike Sara school didn't come easy to Tegan and she struggled through the AP courses she chose. If her sister could do it so could she. Tegan's pace quickened when she reached their house, a pleasant two story suburban house. There were no cars in the driveway so her parents weren't home. Walking up to the door she saw a shadow on the ground, she looked up and saw something move on top of the roof. Confused she went inside and went up to Sara's bedroom which had a access to the roof through a window. She grabbed a broom, thinking it was a raccoon she could shoo away. Tegan stepped onto the roof carefully, and was confused even further when she saw Sara standing at the edge facing her backyard. "What the fuck are you doing?" She shouted and watched in horror as Sara jumped in suprise, losing her footing. She slipped off the roof quickly, and Tegan heard the thump of her body hitting the ground. She ran to the edge and looked down to see Sara clutching her left arm. "Oh shit oh shit oh shit." Tegan shouted in panic as she ran as fast as she could back downstairs and outside. She yelled at her sister when she reached her. "Why were you up there!?" Tegan asked fretting over Sara, who remained too calm for someone who probably just broke their arm. Sara responded. "I don't know... I was just trying to feel something." Tegan couldn’t understand what that meant and became worried she hit her head as well. She was on the phone with her mom asking her to drive home as soon as she could. Sonia arrived home quickly and found her daughters by the front porch waiting for her, she checked over her youngest while Tegan puzzled over Sara's words. They left to the hospital and Tegan decided to not ask her sister about it just yet. Hours later Harry pulled Sara by her good arm into the kitchen away from Sonia in the living room. “I don't buy Tegan's story about you tripping and falling on your arm, the break was serious. What happened?"  His serious gaze left no room for excuses. Sara told the truth. "I was on the roof and she startled me, I fell off." Harry's face froze. "You... were on the roof..." he said slowly not understanding.  He thought his girls were fighting not falling off of roofs. "I was on the edge, just thinking." Sara said. Harry put his hands on her shoulders. "If you're having thought of killing yourself you need to tell me." He said concerned, a deep crease between his brows. Sara shook her head. "Kill myself? I would never that's pathetic. I just wanted to feel alive, like everybody else does." Harry sighed in relief. She put her hand on his chest, feeling the quick heartbeat. "Like that, I don't get scared like you do. I'm just empty dad." She said. Harry lowered his head. "Do you remember anything from before we took you in?" He asked her. She shook her head in response. "Good, you shouldn't remember, it got into you too early." He said the last part to himself. Sara pretended she didn't hear. He couldn’t think of what else to say for now, so he just patted her shoulders. "I'm sorry you feel that way Sar, if you need anything you come to me you understand? Don’t tell your mother or your sister they’ll just worry, we will deal with this together just you and me.” He said softly, he didn’t reveal to his wife the whole story of how he found her, and he would never tell Tegan, it was Sara’s personal history and she shouldn’t have to be judged or pitied. Sara agreed and left to her room. She found Tegan waiting for her. When Tegan spotted Sara she immediately gave her a hug taking care not to hurt Sara's arm which was wrapped in a cast. “I'm so sorry I didn't think earlier, I shouldn’t of yelled I'm sorry ." Tegan said crying into Sara's shoulder. Sara just patted her and hugged her back as best as she could. "It's okay Teegs. I'm the stupid one on the roof". Sara comforted her elder sister. "Why were you up there?" Tegan asked even more worried than Harry. "I was just bored Tegan. I had nothing better to do I guess." Sara lied. Tegan didn’t press. A perfect moment.... the power she feels. The terrified human writhing underneath her, grasping for something, struggling to to live a little bit longer. She wished they didn't squirm and scream their little lungs out. It made the kill less messy. When the human below her lay still in the face of death, she knew that they understood. They deserved it, all of them. Harry taught her a code and every few months or so a new trophy was brought home. A drop of blood on a little glass slide. It was the same ritual, clean and perfect. She would search for a target, prove they deserve her knife, stalk them and slide a needle in their neck. Once she set a date for their capture she would set up a kill room, covering every inch of it with plastic to catch blood and other evidence, and set a table in the centre of it. Her victims would be bare, tied to the surface below them. Breathing in she would soak in the feeling of complete control and power, staring into wide eyes, and begging expressions underneath her. Her urges reach their peak now, pushing and pulling inside of her body. The need rising up and urging her to kill. To plunge the knife in a soft chest and watch the light fade away. Two long pale fingers would be placed on the jugular feeling the pulse grow fainter and fainter. The need would be finally satisfied, it would recoil and roll in itself, staying hidden for weeks. Sara felt so content, like everything was right. Another murderer, rapist or drug dealer was dead and her hunger was dealt with. She viewed it as taking out the trash, balancing her evil by removing others. To get rid of the evidence, she cut them up into pieces, placed them into black plastic bags and dumped them out in the ocean. Dozens of bags now lay on the ocean floor. She was a dark avenger guided by her twisted pleasure and her father's guiding hand. The first rule was never kill an innocent. The second was to never get caught Tegan would never find out about her darkness. Well she did know a little bit. Sometimes when describing a crime she would become.... excited so to say. She remembered a time when she let her guard down and let Tegan glimpse into her mind.   *****"Fucking mary mother of fuck!" Tegan spat angrily. Sara looked up at tiny tee tee and watched her strong jaw muscles clench. "How long do you think this guy has before Janks kills him Sara?" Sara thought for a moment, and made a mistake of sharing her thoughts. "Well... his Nick is unlike his previous victims, he knows what Janks does to his victims since he was apart of the special ops team looking for him?" Tegan nodded angrily and Sara thought if she could have any feelings she would have them for her sister. She continued while staring at her sisters labret. The serial killer they were hunting was a doctor by the name of Robert Janks. He has been leaving body parts around the city, an arm here, a leg there. Sara and her co-workers concluding that the victims were alive while being cut apart. The case is gaining a lot of media coverage because the parts were left in public places, and also because a law enforcement officer has been abducted by Janks. Police get very passionate about a case when a fellow officer is involved. They haven't got any clues to his location yet. Sara continued her theory. "Nick must be trained for torture, he's gonna be braced for it and Janks for sure knows this and will probably try to break him some other way. I'm thinking Nick will be held captive, alive for a few days. That's already torture because he'll have time to imagine all sorts of things, knowing he will be killed. But this guy has a short waiting time between kills so he will kill someone else before Nick. What better way to soften him up than to have him watch what will be done to him? Or hearing it, the screams and moans. Maybe he'll even smell it." Sara finished, unaware she was gesturing more with her hands than usual. Her eyes were lit up in excitement. Honestly she wanted to know what Janks would do next, he certainly had interesting ideas. "Jesus fuck your weird." Tegan said softly, staring at her sister, weirded out at how animated Sara had become. "Sara you don't even get this happy when it's your birthday." She said cautiously, treading carefully. She's seen this before, but just chalked it up to Sara loving her job a little too much since she didn't have any hobbies.  Sara immediately had her mask back in place, trying to avoid looking caught like a child with her hand in the cookie jar. "Sorry I just.. I'm trying to get this guy, I got excited at the thought of catching him. Nick doesn't deserve to die." Sara lied. Tegan has always knew something was off, Sara was aware about that.... but hopefully she would never find out the truth. She would have to be more careful when helping her sister with a case. Keeping her excitement in check wouldn't be too hard to do she hoped. Sara added this to her ever growing list of rules, do's and don'ts of how to be human..“Oh fuck Sara" Tegan gasped as she came, shaking. Her head was thrown back as she came down from her high. The woman between her legs peeked up and looked up at Tegan confused "It’s Deborah... for the second time" she said, not appearing too deterred. "Does that really matter?" Tegan asked defensively, hoping this girl wouldn't question her further. Calming down from her orgasm she got off her lover's face and out of the bed. Deborah just shrugged and turned over to sleep. With a high amount of alcohol in her system Tegan got up and left the girls apartment quickly. Walking in the dark to her own place she felt the familiar shame creeping up, as it did every time thought about her unrequited love during sex. Drinking so much that night made her reckless, and she couldn't help but replace a strangers face with Sara’s. Drinking and sex was her solace, and when her own desires became too much to handle, it spilled up out of her with the help of some tequila. Unwilling to tell her sister, she tried to fuck and forget her forbidden feelings. It depressed her even more that she had to fantasize about her sister to get off, and that she could never really love Sara the way she wanted to. 'If only she felt the same, it's not like we are actually siblings'' t thought sadly and winced, if they shared the same blood her crush could be disastrous. It was weird enough to have a crush on your adoptive sister. .... Her shadow bounced around inside her stomach, her chest, her head. Folding over her body with a powerful fevor. She could barely control it when the time was so near. The man lay on the table, naked and wrapped against the table with plastic. She waited for him to wake up. He opened his eyes and squinted, the light above being too bright. His tongue felt heavy and he could feel a piercing headache. A figure appears, above him? ‘Unhgg... hello?.... what is this? why can’t I move my body! ahH-!’ He shouted. Pain rang in his temple, his instinct was to hold his head but he was immobile, and on top of what felt like a table. The person who hit him grabbed his head and forced him to look right. “Look there”. He heard youthful and feminine voice say, that confused him, was he being robbed by a woman? He sees a plain table covered in plastic, picture frames on top with photos of children, class photos to be exact. He gulps. This wasn’t a robbery. “Who the fuck are you? This is fucked up.” He strains against the plastic holding him down, wiggling and jerking around. He cries out again as the woman grabs his hair roughly and slams his head back. “I know what you did to those kids, I’m gonna make you pay for it.” He begins to tremble. “N- n- no no please I didn’t do anything. You can’t... you can’t prove anything I didn’t do it!’ Looking up at his assailant he can’t see much, the light above them is too bright. He hears her laugh softly. “Oh Marco, you’re right, there is no solid proof you killed Dana and Alice, the two girls who went missing from your sister’s fourth grade class. Fortunately I followed you for a week, and you stopped by another little girl’s school, and followed her home each day. I broke into your house last night and found your browser history to be quite enlightening. As well as your criminal history.” She told him, seemingly nonchalant about it all. Marco is frozen, he can’t believe what he’s hearing, everything he’s tried to hide this woman has just bared. He spots a glint of light and stiffens as he feels metal against his cheek. “Please.” He cries, the fight in him is gone. The woman slices his cheek, not too deep, just enough for blood to spill. He watches her collect a drop of blood and dab it on a glass slide. She disappears for a moment. He closes his eyes, and starts to sob and waits in desperation for something or someone to save him. The light above him is blocked partially when the woman returns. He finally gets a good look at her, a woman in her mid twenties with short hair and a pretty face, certainly not who he’d expect to take vengeance on him. “Why you?” He gasps. She pauses a moment, and he sees a big knife in her hands and cringes, trying to move away in his limited position. “I’m a monster just like you” she says calmly and plunges the knife in, forcing the blade deep in his chest. He tries to scream at the ripping pain but he can only open his mouth wide as his lungs and ribs are crushed. His attempts to scream only increase his need for oxygen, he can’t breathe anymore and begins to choke on the blood pouring in his throat. The woman is smiling. She tugs the blade out of his chest without care and he blacks out.Her face, white, struggling to take in air, too stunned to move. Emotions ran quickly across her face. Sara groaned internally, annoyed more than upset. Can this situation get any worse she thought. A moment passed, and Tegan made a retching noise, she bent over threw up on the floor. She shifted away from the mess, and looked at Sara, still sporting that disbelief on her face. Her body slumped down and her face smacked on the ground. Sara stepped over to see that her sister's eyes were closed... she fainted. Sara sighed. Great her sisters body and DNA spreading evidence. At least she had the plastic. She quickly thought of a plan. She took her needle and gave her sister a shot in the arm, a low dose to keep her unconscious for a couple hours. She carefully picked her up and brought her to her car outside. Fishing Tegan's keys out of her pocket, Sara unlocked the car and put Tegan in the trunk, before thinking she was being rude and switching her to the backseat, sisters don't belong in the trunk. Harry would disapprove. Going back to the shed Sara went to work. An hour later she she hauled the pieces of Marco to the trunk in trash bags along with the plastic and her tools. Sara drove to the marina and walked around for a few minutes, satisfied there was no one around or awake at this time she started up her small boat and went a couple miles out. After stopping she proceeded to throw the evidence away quickly, as Tegan could wake up any second with the low dosage she gave her. It was a struggle to haul Marco overboard but she managed, she didn’t work out for nothing. Sara quickly wrapped her tools in plastic as well and threw them overboard. She would usually clean them thoroughly to reuse them but if her sister tried to arrest her she had to be free of any evidence. Sitting near the wheel Sara allowed herself to think about Tegan's reaction when she would wake. Cry and swear a lot probably, but could sara manage to convince her not to arrest her? She would mention Harry and the code, hopefully that could make Tegan see past her deeds and look at her work as a good thing. She is technically enforcing the law still... illegally. She didn’t care much about helping society but she could use that way of thinking to sway her sisters view.  If Tegan wouldn't keep her life a secret Sara would have to leave Miami. Unfortunately if she let Tegan go her name and face would soon be all over the news and would make it harder to blend in but Sara couldn't bring herself to kill Tegan, if it was anyone else she wouldn't think twice. She thought of Tegan's goodness, her importance and happiness in the world and weighed that against letting herself; a monster live and go free living an empty life. Sara sat down on a bench near the stern of the boat, away from Tegan as she didn’t want to frighten her. She looked back at Miami, the city buildings glowing orange in the sunset. If she had to leave, or went to prison she wouldn't miss anybody but Tegan. Maybe Emy her ex, but she barely knew half of who Sara was. Emy left her after realizing Sara’s emotions weren’t getting any deeper, she could sense Sara’s thoughts straying from their relationship. The sound of the waves lapping against the boat drew her gaze back to the ocean. It was always peaceful when she drove out here. Quiet and calm, the waves lulling her,  after a successful night out hunting. She has nothing else to take care of so she liked to relax and enjoy the lack of pressure and frustration she had after not killing for awhile. Her dark passenger has retreated to a deep part in her mind for now.Tegan groaned as she gained consciousness, pain thundering through her head and a soreness in her neck. She was puzzle to hear the sound of seagulls and waves? Opening her eyes and lifting her head a little she noticed she was lying down on a boat... her sisters boat. She slowly sat up and looked for Sara, spotting her sitting down and looking lost in thought. Tegan opened her mouth to speak but stopped and gasped. Her expression went from confused to scared in a heartbeat. She instinctively looked around for an escape as memories resurfaced through her head. "Oh my god" Tegan mumbled. Sara looked at her. "Hey uh, you're awake... you feeling okay? I have some aspirin if you-" Tegan couldn't hear the rest as her body convulsed and she threw herself on the ledge of the boat, vomiting overboard. "I'll get you some aspirin and water, you have such a weak stomach geez." Sara tried to add some normalcy to this situation. She felt her back pocket for the needle to make sure she was ready to knock her sister out again if she didn't listen. The retching stopped soon and Tegan turned around and sat down, she couldn't believe it, she remembered seeing Sara pull the knife out of a man’s chest. "Oh fuck... No no no no no no no." She grew frantic. Sara moved forward reaching out with a hand as if trying not to scare a frightened animal. "Tegan I'm not gonna hurt you, please relax and let me explain." She said softly. "What the hell Sara! Why the did you stab him? Oh my god you’re a murderer!" She shrieked. Tegan had one constant good thing, her sister, she was her anchor in life and now Sara was not who Tegan believed to be all her life. "Erm I'm uhh sorry?" Sara said sadly at a loss of how to act. Should I pet her? Give her a hug? She wondered. She stood up and found a cloth to offer to her sister. "Clean your face i don't want snot on my boat." Sara said. "Fuck you! Why did you kill him... like that?!" Tegan shouted, not bothering to wipe her face. "Seriously your boogers are everywhere, you always had lots of snot when you cried." Sara deflected, Tegan stared at her bewildered... then picked up the cloth angrily, wiped her face and threw it at Sara. It bounced off the younger sibling harmlessly. "Answer me!" she stood up and tried to push Sara. "Explain now, before I throw you off your stupid boat." She yelled. Sara grabbed her arms and twisted her sister away from her. Tegan gasped in pain and shock at how much strength Sara had. She always considered herself as the stronger sibling all her life. Sara grabbed Tegan’s shoulders and stared into her eyes, attempting to convey her seriousness. "I will not hurt you Tegan." She hoped she would have time to explain her side, before Tegan would really try and throw her overboard. Tegan seemed to believe her and her grip slackened. She stepped back and waited to see what Tegan would say. The younger woman had never been so emotional in her life, even when her parents had died. How could her favourite person on earth be a murderer? Sara had looked so comfortable and so alive with her hands around that knife. Tegan never witnessed her sister so content looking as she is now. From what Tegan had suspected lately she probably hurt people before tonight as well. She sat down against the side of the boat and felt tears stream down her face. She couldn't help the sobs that escaped from her frame. Sara felt uncomfortable watching Tegan cry, she never knew how to handle tears. She slowly went and sat beside her sister, a few feet away and put her hand on Tegan's knee and said "there there" very awkwardly. Tegan leaned away, she sniffed and looked up at Sara, she stuttered out. "Tell me, why and how long.... What's really wrong with you." Sara nodded. “You were never supposed to know about this, Harry taught me how, he gave me a code to follow... I only kill people who deserve it." She said and waited for her to say something, but Tegan had started to cry again. The sobs she let out were racking her fragile body. Sara went ahead and explained everything, from the beginning. She'll get it all over with now while she had Tegan here *one cup of snot later*"Fuck you Sara." Tegan spat pacing across the boat angrily. "You could've told me and we could've dealt with this together! I would've helped you and tried to understand but instead you go ahead and kill people?!" Sara sighed. "You know I couldn't, you are literally a cop." Tegan nostrils flared and she said "Well being your sister is more important than some job asshole, I'll always love you even if you do have... some sickness." Tegan stopped pacing and sat beside Sara on the bench, it was getting lighter, the waves were choppier than before and they would have to get back soon for work. How could Tegan work knowing what she did now, she would be wrestling with her loyalty to her career and her love for Sara. She was also dealing with heartbreak, if Sara really didn't have any emotions as she claimed then she would never loved Tegan back. "I'm sure it's either psychopathy or sociopathy, I'm not sure since they're both similar, and I have traits of both." Sara said, she wanted to hurry up this conversation so they could drive back, if Tegan wouldn't arrest her then great, she could finally go and get some breakfast. "What did dad think?" Tegan asked. Sara thought for a moment and said "He always mentioned what happened to me when I was younger and how the 'darkness' got into me too early, not very scientific I know but..." She trailed off not sure what Harry really thought, he tried not to bring up any diagnoses or treatment when they tried it and found it didn't work, just got Sara more frusterated. Tegan motioned to the wheel and Sara understood she wanted to go. "You aren't gonna put me in prison are you?" She said softly, trying to gain more pity from her sister. Tegan couldn't meet her eyes but said "I could never hurt you Sara." That was enough for Sara and she nodded, switched the engine on and drove back to Miami. Then Tegan threw herself in the water and the propellers shredded her up and Sara shrugged, kept driving and got a bacon sandwich. .... Sara told her about her birth mother being murdered, and Harry's teachings. Sara emphasized her victims crimes and told Tegan about the worse ones; the priest who kidnapped children and killed them, the drug lord who hacked up rival dealers and their families too. Tegan didn't say a word, she just cried silently throughout Sara's words. The sun was rising by the time she was done. She sat a few feet away from Tegan. The younger woman's face was dry and she still sat staring at the floor. "I can't believe you are a fucking psychopath and I never knew." Sara shook her head. "I'm not sure if I'm a psychopath, or if I'm sociopathic. I would go to a therapist but thats risky. We could both agree I'm screwed up beyond repair though right?" Sara said lightly, willing to share now that her secret has been revealed. To be honest it was nice letting it all out and finally talking with someone about it other than her victims. "You can't tell anyone about what I do." She stated firmly. Tegan looked up and her eyes hardened. "How can I not Sara, it doesn't matter that you kill bad people you're still breaking the law, and I'm a detective for fucks sake! You'll get caught one day and I'll be in prison with you for keeping quiet. I... don't think I live with myself if I let you keep on killing... you'll probably kill me anyways." She said hopelessly, Tegan was unable see any other option than to tell the police. Sara shifted closer until their arms almost touched and put her hand on top of Tegan's. Tegan tensed up but didn't move her hand away. Sara spoke softly now. "Tegan look at me." She used her other hand to turn Tegan's chin towards her, wanting eye contact; a human weakness. "I would never ever hurt you... and I will never get caught, I haven’t attracted any attention for years. I know everything about avoiding the law and how to clean up after myself because of Harry... He saw my work as a positive rather than a negative." Sara said. "Dad was crazy for not taking you to a doctor." Tegan said sadly. Her sister could've gotten help but instead dad turned her into his own sick tool justice. She did believe Sara's story, she knew her dad was appalled at the criminal justice system. The one thing that really enraged their father was a murderer slipping through the flaws of police work. Harry had a close friend that was shot and killed, the shooter charged but escaped punishment due misfiled paperwork. Her vision of her father being a honourable cop was shattered. "Hey look at it this way, I'm like one of those superheroes you love." Sara almost laughed out loud at Tegan’s facial bewildered expression. She explained "I'm getting rid of all the bad guys, and saving their future victims." Sara motioned towards the water. "That guy killed two little girls here in Miami, maybe three more in the past based on news reports from his hometown I found, I knew for sure he was searching for another victim here before I stopped him.” When Sara dropped Tegan off at her home she waited until Sara's car left. Then she went to her bedroom and grabbed the phone. With shaky hands she entered 911 before stopping with her finger on the call button. She wanted to call so badly but she couldn't make herself. She started imagining Sara dragged out of her home by the police. She could be be thrown in prison forever, or face the death penalty. Tegan's eyes widened as she realized something.