An Angel who lost everything when he was found. [Castiel from Supernatural. Independent/Multiverse RP Blog. From any timeline. Previously thursdays-soldier.]
♔- I can’t think of a plot for us and I want to figure that out first!
☃ - I’m not sure how our characters would meet.
☁- I’m worried you only RP with a certain group of people.
♛ - I wrote you a starter and you haven’t replied yet…
★ - I’m intimidated by how much you write
☂ - I’m intimdated by how often you post
☾ - I don’t know how to approach you
☄ - I’m super anxious about EVERYTHING
☀ - I keep hoping you’ll message me first…
Folklore says
Angels walk among humans
Disguised as the common person.
Sometimes I think
These angels don’t know that they’re angels.
They give and give
Until they cannot fulfill
Their own need to love.
That’s why I think angels
Are the saddest of them all;
They spend so much of their time
Making others happy
That they cannot
Make themselves smile anymore.
Hello! I was wondering if you think Cas has had to deal with toxic masculinity in the show?? Thank you!!
Hello! Thank you for the ask ^^
Oh boi, this is a big question and I am running on a tiny handful of energy coins left after a long day, so I’m afraid I cannot really do it justice right now, but I can try.
Long story short, yes, Cas has been affected by toxic masculinity. I think there are two vectors for this kind of analysis - what Cas has picked up from his being an angel, and what Cas has picked up from the humans closest to him.
Angel society/culture as we meet it ever since the angels are introduced in the show is imbued with toxic masculinity. They’re soldiers. Heaven is structured as a military hierarchy. Compassion, love, emotionality are not valued. Heck, they’re not even supposed to feel emotions - it’s actually forbidden.
That’s where Cas come from. You can read Cas’ story as a journey towards becoming a purer (as in, more accurate) version of himself, not really unlike Dean. We talk a lot about Dean learning to shed the layers imposed on him by his upbringing and the environment he’s lived in and the traumatic experiences he’s gone through, learning to let his “soft” self shine through - but the same applies to Cas.
Look at how Cas acts in season 5 and especially 6, and compare it to how he’s been acting in the following years. It’s been Cas all along, but as time passes, he’s letting himself be softer, he’s letting himself act on his compassion and care. And that’s been a primary cause of conflict with the rest of the angels, because an angel is not supposed to be like that.
I have been writing about “angelhood” as a normative ideal that can be read as metaphorical for normative concepts of masculinity or femininity (but mostly masculinity, I may add), and how Cas defies that, in a way that codes him as queer/trans. So yeah, the more Cas distances himself from a strict angelic identity, the more he’s distancing himself from a rigid, toxic ideal concept of what an angel should be, and I find it easy to trace a tight parallel between angelhood and heteronormativity (and consequently toxic masculinity).
But even outside of the metaphor, yes, angels are imbued with toxic masculinity, which can be traced up to God being sexist (textually stated in the show, plus there’s an entire arc about him and Amara that represents that).
Cas’ journey isn’t just about embracing humanity in itself, but embracing parts of himself that heaven has tried to repress in him - the parts that represent exactly the opposite of toxic masculinity. In season 6 he was acting as an angel. More recently, he’s been acting as a human. Substitute angelhood and humanity with toxic masculinity and healthy/soft masculinity, and ta-da. Cas’ journey is about accepting his emotional, caring, soft side, not being ashamed for it, and in fact giving the angels the virtual middle finger for trying to repress those things in him.
I mentioned another vector, what Cas has picked up from the humans closest to him. The things is - Cas has learnt humanity primarily from the Winchesters. After he rebels to heaven at the end of s4, Dean, Sam and Bobby have been his models for humanity. In 9x03 he explicitly says that Dean and Sam are his teachers for being human. So, well, he does pick up things from them. Let’s be real, learning humanity from s5-s6 Dean and Sam is not exactly ideal. No wonder the guy immediately learnt how to make major mistakes that mess up the world and your closest relationships.
I think his journey and Dean’s have been strictly intertwined - they’ve been learning and growing parallel-y to each other and have learnt from each other and helped each other grow. And that growth is about shedding toxic layers and accepting their emotionality, their soft sides, the caring and loving core of their personalities.
Which doesn’t mean that those “toxic layers” are something extraneous to them. Something just juxtaposed to their real personalities. Neither Dean or Cas is 100% a pure creature made of love and softness - the bad parts are part of them too. But their journey has been about deconstructing the parts that forcefully stifled the softness in them, acknowledging their emotionality and accepting the vulnerability that comes with letting it shine though. It’s been about choosing what they want to be, and not letting their upbringing/environment/trauma choose it for them and force them to repress parts of themselves that are not included in that model and are instead necessary for their well-being and happiness - because emotionality and vulnerability are necessary for men’s well-being and happiness.
“Me? Danced? Yeah, sure I have,” he answers a little too quickly, aknee-jerk reaction that’s all careful nonchalance, but still Dean considers thequestion, of what constitutes this kind of dancing—its candid atmosphere he hasn’tquite acclimated to breathing in yet—and follows up with an honest half-shrug. Thecloseness of their chests bids his to swell with fondness, so much so that hisgreen eyes that’ve been trained on Castiel’s hitherto falter in their intensity,flicker downward to study the loose threads on the shoulder of Cas’ shirt.
“… just, y’know, different… from this,” he adds with allvagueness intact.
Absent from their dancing is the type of cheapromance that precedes one-night stands—the only kind Dean has known up untilnow, and it shouldn’t be more terrifying than the monsters in his jobdescription, but somehow it is.
I live here on my knees as I try to makeyou see
That you’re everything I think I need here on the ground—
Tentatively his hand shifts fromCastiel’s waist to the small of his back, his cheek just as hesitantly pressing against Castiel’s temple, and his little smile with its uncertain edge becomes lost in the messybedhead of Castiel’s hair.
Castiel audibly sighs as Dean leans in closer, lips against his hair, breath ghosting over Dean's collarbone. It's a sensation that this ex-angel is only just getting used to, but the feeling of warmth, not from a fire or the sun, but from another physical being, is... pleasant. It is... safe, in a way that Castiel could never find words for.
"Is that... better?"
He closes his eyes despite his enquiry, and leans further in. The close embracing most certainly reduces their dancing to a simple sway. Cas' fingers gently entangle at the cloth of Dean's shirt.
The one thing that I still know is that you're
Keeping me down,
He can still feel the slight tension in Dean's shoulders, and after a moment of consideration, Castiel gently places a kiss against Dean's neck.
It is here he allows himself to be in love, as only humans can.
sometimes cas is this soft peaceful wise creature who cures babies in his free time and tends bees but he also ate an entire tablet and carved a sigil into his chest with a boxcutter so there’s that.
#and that one time he dug a bullet out of his flayed stomach with his fingers and then shoved it into his brother’s eye#orrrr the time he was vomiting blood and cut a guy’s finger entirely off his hand#idk man cas is pretty metal i’m not gonna lie
Dean still couldn’t get over that Cas was…alive. Like honest to GOD alive. But when he looked at the angel…It was TRUE. Cas was there. He was alive. He half expected to be dreaming. That he would wake up finding that he had dreampt that Cas had come back to him.
The angel didn’t speak. He MUST have been in shock. That was all the hunter could amount to, or he WASN’T real. That was always an option to.
When Cas finally jolted forward, sitting up and TRYING to…well Dean wasn’t sure WHAT he was trying to do. But Dean still held him there all the same. Whatever was going on, Dean doubted that he should just jump up and leave. And Dean wasn’t SURE he was ready for him to leave. He was pretty sure if Cas just left…it might just KILL him.
❝ Whoa hey! Cas calm down Lucifer isn’t here! ❞ He tried his best to calm the angel, his gaze only going back to where the portal was. Mom. She was GONE. Stuck there…With LUCIFER. He sighed and looked back at Cas. ❝ We gotta get outta here Cas. We gotta get you back to the bunker. ❞
>Castiel grunts as he tries to move out of Dean's grip, but the desperation in the tug on his own clothes slows the angel, and while he's now sitting up, he's staring straight at Dean. He's still holding onto his shirt.
"But where's - what happened? Where is he?-- Where's Sam-- Kelly-"
It's at the revelation of Kelly does he finally shift out of Dean's grasp, and tries to stand up. He's weak.
"I have to make sure she's safe, I can't leave - I promised-"
He staggers, phantom pain hitting his chest.
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