God's sleepiest creature

[tinfoilstork]

@landysbear

[miscling]

look at you, so tired. always having to be the big one, always having to be in charge and in control. do you ever get to relax? do you ever get to rest? when was the last time you had a break?

please, sit down. such things are beneath you, allow it to help you. can it fetch you a drink? a snack? speak and it will be done. allow it to take responsibility for what needs to be done for a while, and take a moment to recover.

it is here to serve. it is here for you. you needn't worry about the small stuff. leave it to this thing. enjoy all that you will, and leave the things that are beneath you to those whose place is to serve you.

it will clean and tidy, organise and arrange, and make all well for you, because it exists to be of service. it needs to be of service. that is its place, and yours is to enjoy it.

[angel-derangement]

“we live in an uncaring universe” yeah dude and I live in an uncaring house. and I shit in an uncaring toilet. but do you touch an uncaring lover? do you comfort an uncaring child? do you guide to sleep each night a cold and uncaring self?

[carlpotatoman]

You clever motherfucker.

For those of us who are unaware,

This is the post on your feed/timeline/whatever the fuck we call it here on Tumblr i forgot

This is when you click on the post.

Op. You are a clever fucker, and i discover new ways this shithole is broken every single day.

[angel-derangement]

“we live in an uncaring universe” yeah dude and I live in an uncaring house. and I shit in an uncaring toilet. but do you touch an uncaring lover? do you comfort an uncaring child? do you guide to sleep each night a cold and uncaring self?

[angel-derangement]

please hurry up in reblogging this I wanna jorts it before someone puts it in one of those heartwarming tiktok slideshows

[ablubluh]

i was like 'what could jorts it possibly mean' but as with many things clicking the original post immediately clarified the situation

[treecitysessions]

[thebiballerina]

Trying to fall asleep in summer is much like the dilemma described in Katy Perry’s hit song Hot N Cold (2008).

[thebiballerina]

Allow me to demonstrate. I am not a visual artist, but I will attempt to communicate my point. If any actual visual artists would like to improve upon this, please feel free.

[thebiballerina]

Well, I can’t sleep for SOME REASON, so here’s more.

[authortobenamedlater]

Also applicable to perimenopause.

[fairyinthetrees]

going with the flow in a face down in a river kinda way

[lowpawly]

people foolishly dismiss desserts and treats as having no nutritional value when they actually are necessary for refilling your sanity stat. to prove my point please observe the emotional stability of the next person you meet who doesnt let themselves ever eat any form of dessert

[life-ennder]

this is the only day of the year that the calendar emoji is correct

📅

[tall]

[tsalala]

"After the excitement of feeding time, the lion cubs settle down with round, full bellies and sleepy eyes. The playful wrestling and curious explorations can wait for another day. For now, they rest side by side, content and secure beneath the watchful gaze of the pride."

Taken in Bushbuckridge, South Africa Photographed by Tendai Moyo

[skopostheorie]

[why-bless-your-heart]

The point of Eva Stratt telling Grace that he doesn't have any family, not even a dog, isn't to tell him that he wouldn't be missed: she's telling him that staying is selfish. He doesn't have any genuine obligations on Earth. No dependents, parents or children, nobody he's made any vows to, not even an animal who's counting on him to stay. Meanwhile a whole planet is counting on him to leave.

Also I think it's interesting that Andy Weir has written two novels about military-aged, single, childless men — historically and narratively often treated as a disposable demographic — and emphasized the importance of their survival against all odds.

[hailraykin-deactivated20230814]

Reblog to give mutuals a break from whatever they're been going through

[sigmaleph]

every day i am thankful to ancient humans for the domestication of the cat. fucking genius idea. agriculture was a good one too btw but you really outdid yourselves with the cat thing

[yr-tiktok-mom]

[maswartz]

[jonny-r217]

[maidslime]

Ok like. Imagine life without ads. You wake up, check your messages across a variety of apps, no ads. You get up and put on the tv while you prep your breakfast, no ads. Maybe you drive somewhere and switch on the radio, no ads. Maybe you drive a long distance, yet somehow, not a single billboard on your path. You pick up a newspaper or magazine to pass the time, no advertisements only articles. You turn on your game console, the home screen is just about your games, no ads to buy more. You open a streaming app, you don't pay extra for no ads, there's just no ads ever.

Think about how much of your time is spent looking at ads. "Download ublock" yeah I know, I have. But that doesn't change that the world is covered with endless advertising. Imagine never seeing that again. How much better our lives would be.