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not to be dramatic but i literally wither audrey 2 style without a high dose of physical affection

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What does it mean when my nervous system has been in shut down for years? Basically 90% of my adulthood. I have started body oriented therapy 1 year ago and I like it, but I still have very hard time feeling positive emotions even at slightest… I used to be so emotional and used to feel happiest from tiniest details… I feel dead inside and witnessing how alive the world outside me is is painful and almost seems unfair and frustrating

what's the struggle about, allowing the feeling or inspiring the feeling? what changed since then?

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rain and lightning

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my sister was saying this looks like armand and daniel # proud # devil's minion cathedrals

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went to the ephesos museum with my sister <3 very pretty and it was thundering outside

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growing up knowing love as this nebulous thing that doesn't inform how someone treats you - so it's effectively unquantifiable - distorts your view of loving relationships. it's irrelevant how much someone loves you if that love doesn't translate into kindness, respect and care. loving someone is not just feeling love for them. it's not enough to love someone, you have to be loving towards them

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whenever someone uses the excuse that they're too old to learn how to use my pronouns it's like yeah ... a foot from death's door really. barely still with us honestly. might as well just roll over and turn to dust at this point. nothing more to learn or explore or experience out of life. that's a wrap diva!

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i love my swedish friend # min älskade jordgubb

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recent pins my friend added to his vicboard