Imagine that every mundane thought turned into a life altering series of events that were completely real and happening to you in your head as you thought of them. You felt the pain, experienced the fear, every second of emotional termoil as if it were real life. Tell you wouldn’t be a little fucked up too?
That vehicle that went by down the street beeping it’s horn, it sounded hollow out there in the darkness as the rain hits the pavement. Is it a mac truck, is the driver pissed at the guy who cut him off, or is he warning other drivers he lost his breaks and knows if he has to manuvuer around them he will lose control of the truck. There’s a family with kids watching videos in the back of that minivan in front of him. The beeping gets faster, he’s frantically trying to get them to understand but dad and mom in the front have been fighting and dad’s tryna make a point by driving slow thinking the truck drivers just being a dick. The beeping and noise of the truck are getting closer to me in the darkness, maybe it’s not a truck at all. Do planes have horns? Maybe it’s a small plane trying to warn people below he’s going to crash as he desperately tries to avoid populated areas. Oh, ok phew, the sound kept going and is now getting further away. Must have been a truck. I bet I’ll hear sirens soon, it’s gotta crash sometime. Maybe mom grabs the wheel of the mini van and gets them out of the way rescuing the family from certain death, or maybe she nags him until he hits the breaks about to tell her to drive if she’s so good at it then splat, mini van family soup. No, doesn’t feel like that kind of ending. Maybe everyone gets out of the way and eventually the truck runs out of gas. Highly unlikely on suicide 6 but maybe. I don’t hear sirens yet. Maybe a superhero saved the day, stopped the truck with sheer strength and determination and saves the day. Little kiddos in the back never knew they were in danger but are now getting selfies with mommy and the superhero she wishes was daddy. What a cunt she is. But hey, in her defense he is sleeping with her sister who has fallen deeply in love with him, she will find out soon when her sister shows up at the scene hugging all over him and so relieved he is okay while ignoring her sister. So, still no sirens, what the hell was that beeping? I guess it’s possible the truck really did get cut off and was just pissed and taking it out on the person who cut them off by using the horn. I know, the truck driver was on his way home to his young family and this blow hole in the mini van could have caused an accident in which truck driver kills this mini van family so it pissed him off …or maybe …du du dunnnnn…. maybe it was the truck drivers wife and kids in his mini van and another dude was driving it … what a canundrum.
So much emotion, anger, sadness, condescension, fear, adrenaline, jealousy, rage, confusing, empathy, loss, excitement and so much more. Imagine feeling all of that in the 15 seconds it took for the truck up go by then the rest in the 30 seconds after … then to lie awake in the darkness, heart racing, emotionally scared from what you have just experienced, afraid to move, I mean what if it was a plane and it circles back, or the truck somehow goes by again, thank goodness I live up the hill, the plane will probably try and land on rt 6 like a runway, not much traffic at midnight, and if the truck crashed on 6 I’m far enough not too erupt into flames until after my 2 neighbors, so maybe I have time to get everyone in the basement, concrete ceiling will save us from anything. Well… fire, probably not, there are windows.
What if there was a fire, would it bust through the windows, would it stay out, would we burn or come out after the fire to a desolate neighborhood ravaged by the fire. Where’s kitty Izzy. If there’s a fire I need to be able to grab her and run, I hope she’s still in the little bed I made her by my bed. It has a curtain to block out the sun when she doesn’t want it.
Everyone has a safe exit if there was a fire. I need to have a fire drill and make sure everyone knows to meet at the mail box. Wait. That could result in getting hit by a fire truck as it takes the steep almost impossible for a fire truck turn into my driveway. I wonder if I asked would the fire dept check and see if they can get a dhow truck into my driveway. I gotta pee … finally, this line of thinking will be quiet for a few seconds while I drag my butt out of bed. Goodnight.
