thinking about this post again and how yue qingyuan very, very rarely allows himself to express anger. even in situations where he would rightfully be angry (e.g., luo binghe torturing shen qingqiu to near death and then afterwards sending his legs in a box to yqy), yqy still does not actually allow himself to get angry at others.
he is disappointed in sqq's actions, yes. he's upset about lbh hurting sqq, yes. but he isn't angry at either of them for how circumstances played out.
even when he came to lbh at the end, he didn't storm into the trap in a rage or attempt to valiantly fight lbh to the death. what do we know if fairly limited, but it's notable that shen yuan describes the thousand arrows scene as yqy "walking unflinchingly into luo binghe's trap, despite knowing there was no return."
i think this has two meanings: 1) his sacrifice is a symbol of yqy's loyalty, love, and devotion to sqq; and 2) he is furious— but only with himself.
let's think about qiu haitang's quote in svsss where she proclaims "if a single word i, qiu haitang, say from here on out is false, may my heart be pierced by ten thousand of the demons' poisonous arrows, and may i be undeserving of a peaceful death!" this quote directly references the way yue qingyuan died in PIDW, and likely also mirrors his true feelings about himself: underserving of a peaceful death.
it's pretty heavily implied, if not outright stated, that yqy does not value his life and would end it in a heartbeat if it meant that sqq would finally be at peace. this is most clearly seen in the water prison scene, where he tries to get sqq to kill him as a way for sqq to finally shed himself of his resentment and hatred. yqy fully believes that his failure to return to the qiu manor on time is why sqq made all of these bad decisions that led to his eventual torture and imprisonment. he believes that at the end of the day, he is a poison in sqq's life. if he needs to die in order for sqq to heal and move on, he'll readily accept his fate.
when he receives sqq's legs in the box, he's angry, yes, but at himself most of all. so he decides to solve the problem at its root: he walks willingly and unflinchingly into a trap, ten thousand poisonous arrows piercing his heart, for he truly believes he is undeserving of a peaceful death. and maybe, with his death, especially with a death so grim and horrific, sqq will finally be at peace.
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