[“When our demands for love become compulsive or insatiable, we have a clue that we doubt our own lovability. For when we doubt that we are lovable, we often need to see it proved over and over. This seems narcissistic on our part, but viewed from a more compassionate perspective, it may suggest that we have a low opinion of ourselves. Indeed, the need to be seen as special can be a compensation for feeling unloved. How can we overcome our self-doubt? Through a simple practice: act lovingly. Lovability is actually the other side of the coin of loving. People who believe they are lovable are people who love. People who love are more likely to be loved. This involves letting go of ego, but it also requires a unique frame of mind: When any conflict or issue arises between ourselves and someone else, we ask not how to win but how to summon up a loving intent and how to act on it. Our immediate question is “How can I be as loving as possible in this circumstance?”]