trying on a metaphor

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@troblin
Happy Easter
*dry food crunches* Ridiculously small kitten: “Myam myam myam. Njam njam njam njam njam njam njam! Myam myam myam nyam nyam myam. Mmmam. Mrrrrram. Meep!”
Oh here it is again. The best video ever
Let! That! Baby! Eat!!!!!!
Perfect tags
a messenger from dragonstone has arrived
and then he broke all of his bones. tragic
When Aemond lost his virginity to Lucerys, Aegon and Daeron gave him this cake:
Joffrey “Break Bones”, Lucerys “The Siren of Driftmark”, Jacaerys “The Righteous.”
This is amazing
*Having dinner together*
Daemon: So what's new with you?
Lucerys: Um, well, I got TiVo
Daemon: Oh! What's that?
Aegon: It's slang for pregnant
Lucerys: AEGON!
Daemon: .....
Daemon: Are you really pregnant?
Lucerys: Well, uhh, yes and no!
Lucerys: Except not no
Lucerys: So to sum it up, yeah!
Daemon: ....
Daemon: Who's the father?
Daemon, panicked: Oh no, please don't tell me it's him
Aegon, offended: Ouch
Lucerys: No! It's Aemond, you like Aemond!
Daemon, unimpressed: Hmm
Lucerys: Oh daddy, I hope you're ok with all of this
Lucerys: I mean, think about it
Lucerys: This is a good thing!
Daemon: .....
Lucerys: This is your first grandchild
Lucerys: You're gonna be a grandpa!
Daemon: It's true...
Daemon: ....
Daemon: I'm gonna be a grandpa!
Lucerys: Yeah!
Aegon: Yeah!
Daemon: So when is the wedding?
Lucerys: ....
Lucerys: The who?
Daemon: The wedding
Lucerys: ....
Daemon, serious: There's gonna be a wedding
Lucerys: ....
Daemon: Young man, don't you sit there and tell me that my first grandchild is gonna be a bastard!
Lucerys, nervous: .....
Daemon: LUCERYS VELARYON TARGARYEN
Lucerys: Febuary 11th!
Daemon: .....
Daemon: Oh goodie! I have to tell Rhaenyra
*leaves to send a raven*
Lucerys: .....
Aegon: .....
Aegon: Sorry , I won't be able to make it to your imaginary wedding, but I'm really busy that day
Lucerys: ....*stressed*
Aegon: Yeah, I already have a unicorn baptism and a leprechaun Bar mitzvah
Lucerys: I know, I panicked
Lucerys: I didn't want him to start yelling at me like I was some kind of 74 latour!
Aegon: It's le fitte, the 74 latour is actually really good wine
*Daemon comes back*
Lucerys: He's coming. Alright, I'm gonna tell him. I'm gonna be Strong
Aegon: * thumbs up *
Daemon: I just sent a raven to your mother
Daemon: I think we might be able to book the plaza on short notice
Lucerys: ....Really?
Lucerys: The plaza?! Oh, daddy! *happy hug*
Aegon, scandalised: Wtf?!
Lucerys: Right, daddy, sit down, I need to tell you something
Daemon: What is it, sweetie?
Lucerys: .....
Lucerys: There's not gonna be a wedding, Aemond and I aren't getting married
Daemon: What?!
Lucerys: I'm sorry
Daemon: I don't believe this!
Lucerys: Daddy, stay calm
Daemon: Is it because that punk Aemond won't marry you?!
Lucerys: uhm
Daemon: Is that it?!
Lucerys, crying: Yes, yes! He says I'm damaged goods!
Aegon, shocked: \(°o°)/
*Daemon, on his way to kill Aemond*
I can’t stop laughing since I realised, I’m the afterlife you KNOWW Maegor was waiting for Viserys after WILLINGLY marrying a Hightower. He was waiting for that twat, he was counting down the days 😭🤚🏽 as much as I love Alicent and her children I know multiple people were waiting to fucking fight these people, to especially fight Viserys. Honestly they would be preparing to fight Rhaenyra too because she tried putting bastards on the throne. It would be none stop fights between Maegor, Visenya and everyone else. Aegon I is going for Viserys. He stopped talking to Balerion for a while because why did he let this man ride him??? HE DOESN’T EVEN LIKE FLYING!!!! Jaehaerys is hiding his face like he didn’t pick Viserys over Rhaenys, his children are side eyeing him…
It’d be like the Kardashian’s but this would be ‘The Targaryens and Them Cûnts’
Lolol omg it'd be a disaster in the afterlife 😭
*Aemond going to war*
Lucerys: I'll go with you
Aemond: No, I can't risk losing anyone I care about
Aegon: I'll go
Aemond: Okay
Aegon: .....
Aegon: .....WOW
Aegon: Just be casual
Helaena: Yes, try some light flirting!
*later, the same day*
Lucerys: Could you pass me that book, please?
Aemond: *intertwines their fingers*
Lucerys: Wh-
Aemond: I'm in love with you.
feel like Lucerys is the kind of bottom that sobs and pleads nonstop “please it’s too big I can’t take it” but as soon as Aemond stops moving Luke would instantly snap his head back and look at his uncle dead in the eye “did I tell you to fking stop”. Leaves Aemond confused af every time
Aemond writing a love letter to Lucerys: