Elaine of Gorre

“I was warned often that loving you would be madness. But I prefer doubt to regret, since what is life without dreaming?” Princess Elaine of Gorre

[troubled-elaine]

Goodbye Camelot.

[troubled-elaine]

saraide-the-handmaiden:

“Oh you have twins?” Saraide asked, a delighted expression coming to her features, feeling a little better already as she looked at the sweet little boy. “He’s very charming,” she chuckled. 

“He looks so much like his father as well.” She said with a smile. Running her fingers through his short curls, she shook her head slightly. “My daughter, my husband always said she has my eyes. And he always said Rhys looked like me as well.” 

[troubled-elaine]

Goodbye Camelot.

[troubled-elaine]

siegeperilleux:

Smiling, despite the the kind of ache in his chest, Galahad nodded and reached out for Rhys. Here, at least, was a relationship far less complicated; he loved his brother and sister, and that was stronger than any other emotion he might also feel. He only hoped putting more distance between them would not change that. For now, he pulled Rhys into his arms to hug him, pressing a kiss to the top of his curly head. “He’s getting big.”

Watching the two of them together warmed her heart. He looks so much like Galahad when he was at that age. Rhys looked up at Galahad with a confused look for a moment, before he started to smile and laugh. A tiny hand reaching out to rest on his older brothers cheek. “I want to cherish the moments when he is this small, I fear they will go by far too quickly.” Elaine parted her lips to speak once more, when another voice called out to her. “Pardon, your highness, but your carriage is ready, we must leave soon if we are to get you to Gorre on time.” 

[morfyddferchurien]

Denouement II Elaine+Morfydd

[troubled-elaine]

morfyddferchurien:

Morfydd felt her jaw fall slack and her eyes widen at Elaine’s words. She wasn’t certain if she should be elated by the news or if she should be fearful of what this meant for her. Elaine had brought her so many blessings that she shouldn’t have been the slightest bit surprised that she would make yet another large move in her life, but she hadn’t expected nearly so much. Never would she be able to thank her enough for taking her in when anyone else would have turned their back on her - a bastard with no title.

“I will never tire of you” she said, the smile on her face blossoming, “Frankly, i’m not certain of what I did in order to deserve you or how I’ll ever be able to thank or repay you for everything that you’ve done for me. Are you absolutely sure of this?” she asked, certain that the woman had thought it over, but she had to be sure for herself before she allowed herself to feel anything about it. Her eyes drifted towards the children. Rhys and Rowena. She would miss watching them grow. They flicked back to the woman before her and a heaviness set in her chest as it dawned on her that she wouldn’t be there to be sure that she had time to heal from the loss of her husband, “You won’t get lonely?”

“I am sure that I will be.” Elaine murmured, her hands in her lap. “But, I have the children, and a few of my ladies maids are coming with me. Some have chosen to stay behind. I have...there is a lot that I am going to miss. You especially. But, it is something that must be done.” Reaching out toward the young woman, Elaine sighed. “This will not be the last time we see each other. I will write to you every chance I have, send for you for visits when the children have their name days, and when Rhys is crowned King. You my dear are a apart of this family now and there is nothing that I want to change.” 

After sitting with Morfydd for a few more moments, Elaine moved to rise to her feet. It was time for her to go. If she didn’t leave soon, she feared she would never. And she had a country to think of. “I will send for you in a few months, to offically instate you in my court as an Emissary, and to give you a tour of my new home. I will miss you terribly, Morfydd.” 

[troubled-elaine]

Goodbye Camelot.

[troubled-elaine]

lincolnshirehealer:

Helen nodded. She was sad, but she knew that life would keep moving forward. “Do not stay away too long. Please?” Helen had very few friends. She considered Elaine a friend.

“I will try not to, but I can not make promises I am not sure I will be able to keep.” Biting at her lip, Elaine reached out to the other woman. “I want to thank you Helen, for everything you have done for me, my children and my husband during our time here.” 

[troubled-elaine]

Goodbye Camelot.

[troubled-elaine]

saraide-the-handmaiden:

Saraide moved her head up when Elaine spoke again, her heart feeling as though it was going to burst from her chest from all the emotions inside her. “Do you think so?” she asked her, her eyes now glazed over as they filled up. “I wish I could have know him even for just a little while,” she told her quietly before shifting her attention to the little boy, “This is his and your son?”

It was the girls eyes. They shown just as brightly as her husbands had. There was also a faint likeness in their features, all of it was almost too much for the Queen to handle. So, she had to admit she was thankful when the attention was then turned to her son. “Yes, this is Rhys...his sister Rowena is in the gardens with her nurse maid.”

[morfyddferchurien]

Denouement II Elaine+Morfydd

[troubled-elaine]

morfyddferchurien:

A small pang pulled at Morfydd’s chest at Her Queen’s words. Morfydd herself had spent a small bit of time down in the stables. The woman who attended the horses was a rather interesting lady and the King’s Marshall - although quiet - was rather wonderful with the horses. She had watched him teach a young girl how to ride and surely if they stayed eventually he would be able to do the same for little Rowena.

Once more Morfydd’s heart dropped. She went over in her head everything that she had done recently, wondering if something had happened to upset Elaine. Perhaps her lady simply wasn’t in need of her anymore. Never had Morfydd been dismissed from a job before. It had been by chance that she had managed to find this position and she was not at all certain of where to begin if she had to find something else. Worse than that she could almost hear her father’s words of disappointment and that hurt far worse than she could have imagined, especially as he had only recently shown the slightest ounce of pride in her. Far more than that though, Morfydd had become attached to the Queen and her babes. With each passing day it became more and more difficult to imagine the rest of her life without them.The brunette tried to hide the hurt on her face as she turned once more towards the pile of branches she had collected, “As you wish, my lady”

Watching the expression on Morfydd’s face, Elaine quickly shook her head. “No, no my dear please do not be upset.” She said quickly. Moving closer to the maiden, she reached out to take her hand. “There is a reason I wish for you to stay. I need a voice that I trust here in Camelot. I need someone who is bright and kind and has my and my children's best interest at heart.” Reaching out to cup the girls cheek, Elaine let a smile part her lips. “I want you to be an Emissary for the Kingdom of Gorre.”

It was a choice she had made on her own, without the guidance of the nobles or the men her husband had in power during his reign. Elaine wanted Gorre to be better than it was, she wanted people she knew could handle the job in power, and she knew in her heart Morfydd was far more than capable to handle this task. “This is far from the last time we will see each other, or speak. You will have letters from me so often you’ll probably be sick of it. I intend to keep my promise to you, and help you continue growing into the smart and beautiful maiden that you are.” 

[troubled-elaine]

Goodbye Camelot.

[troubled-elaine]

siegeperilleux:

Galahad smiled, feeling a knot of emotion welling up in his chest, and reached up to lightly touch her hand where it rested on his shoulders. It was so strange, to feel that there was a connection to her and yet to have such a huge distance between them. But he was glad to know her, to no longer spend evenings trying to decide what shape he thought her face was or what colour her eyes were. That was something, at least. “Yes, of course I will. And I will write to them … and to you. I don’t … I don’t want there to be silence.” Not again.

“No more silence...” She repeated. There was a sort of weight that was lifted off her chest. Though she knew it wouldn’t last for long. Looking down at Rhys, she smiled watching as the little boy reached out for his brother. “We still have some time before we have to leave, would you like to hold your brother?” 

[troubled-elaine]

Goodbye Camelot.

[troubled-elaine]

saraide-the-handmaiden:

Saraide didn’t know know how to react when Elaine told her that Viviane had spoke to her about the fact that the King of Gorre had a child he hadn’t met. She felt almost as though she had been slapped in the face. Though, she didn’t blame the Queen for that part at all. “Yes, she is,” she nodded as she pursed her lips in an attempt to keep them from wobbling. “I am sorry too. It’s funny; I never thought I could miss someone who I never met and yet… death is so permanent”. After a moment she shook he head, “I’m sorry, I could only imagine what you are going through… I shouldn’t be so selfish”.

Elaine watched the young maiden for a moment. The more she looked at her, the more she could see her husband. Smiling softly, Elaine moved the weight of Rhys from one hip to the other. “He would have loved you.” She said after a moment. “Had he known you were alive, he would have loved you with all his heart. You look so much like him.” 

[troubled-elaine]

Goodbye Camelot.

[troubled-elaine]

siegeperilleux:

Galahad wished he could say that none of it mattered, that because Viviane had always been kind and loving and he had been happy in Avalon that it also meant he was not hurt or confused at all. But it wasn’t true. However good her intentions, however much he might understanding his reasoning now, there had been long years of feeling abandoned and unwanted and even now there was lingering hurt that she was giving the twins what she not given him. There was anger, too, that she had played a part in keeping his father from him because of the hurt Lancelot had caused her.

But that was not all there was. Because he had been happy, and he would not wish to give up Viviane or Saraide. Nor did he want his siblings to be deprived of their parents, as he had been. It was just all so tangled and jumbled. “I appreciate the apology. And I hope you know I don’t hold it against you … I understand why you did what you did. Things might not be easy, but I do want to know you, and my brother and sister. I wish you every happiness, Elaine.”

“And I you Galahad...I wish you every happiness and blessing this world has to offer you.” Reaching out to touch his shoulder, the woman tried to keep back her tears. Why was this to be the most emotional encounter she would have. It was hard enough to leave the only home she knew. “I do hope you will visit Gorre when you have the chance. I will tell the children all about their brave and valient older brother, who is a knight in one of the greatest kingdoms in the world.” 

[troubled-elaine]

Goodbye Camelot.

[troubled-elaine]

lincolnshirehealer:

“I will miss every one of you.” Helen smiled sadly. She played with Rowena’s small hands. It reminded her how much she loved children and wanted one of her own.

“Will you ever return to Camelot, Elaine?”

“Perhaps, one day I will.” Elaine wrapped her arms around her frame. “Most likely when the children are older, or when Rhys is crowned King, we will come on a sort of goodwill mission.”

[troubled-elaine]

dinadanhirhyfelwr:

Dinadan watched the boy run off with a quiet chuckle, but started in surprise at the question and swung back around to look at Elaine. “Me? No, no no.” He wasn’t bad at entertaining children, certainly, but the idea of him being a father and responsible for actually raising a child was a mixture of laughable and terrifying. “I have a sister who’s a good few years younger than me, but that’s it.”

“So you helped to care for your sister when she was growing up.” Elaine smiled a moment. “You have a way with children, if you ever do marry and have children of your own, they will be very lucky.” 

[troubled-elaine]

Goodbye Camelot.

[troubled-elaine]

saraide-the-handmaiden:

“Well…” Saraide began. She knew that she was stuttering that that she should try to speak more clearly to a Queen, but she was struggling to accept the words herself. “When I was born my mother died when I was young and I didn’t know who my father was. My mistress took me in and kept his identity a secret from me until the other day,” she did her best to explain, managing to look at the Queen again, “She told me that the Maleagant, the King of Gorre was my father”. She had no idea how she would react to that but despite not wanting to speak to Viviane currently, she did take that advice. 

When Viviane had mentioned this to her before, Elaine hadn’t wanted to believe it. She hadn’t wanted to believe that there was more family that her husband hadn’t been able to meet before his death. Casting her gaze down to the ground, the Queen took in a deep breath. “Your mistress, is the Lady of the Lake, Viviane. She and I have known each other for a while due to other circumstances. She let me know of this revelation. I am sorry that you were not able to meet him before he died.”  

[troubled-elaine]

Goodbye Camelot.

[troubled-elaine]

siegeperilleux:

Galahad wondered if there would ever be a day when he looked at her and didn’t feel a riotous, clashing mix of emotions that were difficult to separate out from one another. Affection, sadness, longing, regret; and maybe still some hurt and resentment. Perhaps not, and certainly her leaving wouldn’t make it any easier … but he could not hold it against her. She had a duty to her son. His brother, which somehow he found easier to accept than thinking of Elaine as his mother.

“I see.” Not really knowing what to say, his gaze flickered over Rhys and then back up to her face. He would certainly miss his little siblings, and regretted that they would likely not see much of each other as they grew up. It seemed he was destined to be estranged in some way from all his blood relations. “Well … here I am.”

This was not how she intended things to go. There was so much she wanted to still say to him, things she’d wished she’d done differently, but there was no time for that. So, she would start with what she knew she could handle. “I’m sorry, Galahad.” She sighed. “There is so much I should have done differently. So much that I wish I could go back and change. But, I can’t and I am sorry for any hurt or confusion that I have caused you.” 

Elaine chose her words carefully, wanting this to not be another moment that she would regret in the future. “I have always loved you, Galahad. Even in the moments I didn’t think I could, I did and I do. I hope that in the future we will have the chance to see each other again, and perhaps make new memories together.” 

[morfyddferchurien]

Denouement II Elaine+Morfydd

[troubled-elaine]

morfyddferchurien:

Morfydd cast a bright smile at her queen. Just in the short time she had known the woman her smile had changed so much. Elaine had gone through so much recently that it was truly no wonder, but it made Morfydd’s heart ache for her. “I don’t know” she replied, “It’s hard to imagine a time when every new discovery was either the most thrilling thing I’d ever experienced or the scariest”. 

The lady-in-waiting lifted a rather small tree branch from the ground and cast it into the pile of debris she had created before turning towards the woman once more. “Pardon my asking, but when are we to leave here? So that I may have your things ready for you and perhaps say goodbye to my brother”

“Rowena I think has a new fond love for horses.” Elaine said with a smile. “I took her down to the stables for the first time the other day and she started to cry when we had to leave.” Nuzzling her nose into her daughters cheek. 

When Morfydd mentioned when they would depart, Elaine’s heart felt heavy. She didn’t have the heart yet to tell the woman that she wouldn’t be coming back to Gorre with her. She needed time to figure out something that she could do in Camelot, so as not to take her from her friends and family that she had here. “I have been meaning to speak to you about that. Morfydd, you will not be coming with me when I return home with the children. I want you to stay here.” 

[troubled-elaine]

Goodbye Camelot.

[troubled-elaine]

lincolnshirehealer:

Helen did not hesitate to pick up the child. Rowena had gotten so big since the last time she saw her. A visit had been long overdue and Helen was sad that this might be the last time she sees Elaine. Things kept moving forward.

“It has been too long, my sweet girl. I have missed you.”

Elaine smiled watching how Rowena smiled and laughed with Helen. “I am sure she will miss you as well, when we return to Gorre in a few days.” 

[troubled-elaine]

Goodbye Camelot.

[troubled-elaine]

saraide-the-handmaiden:

Saraide smiled at what Elaine said she was doing, understanding why she would want to do that. “Well… I think so,” she started but was unsure of how she could go on, “I… I was given some news a couple of days ago… and I thought I could perhaps speak to you”. 

Taking in a breath, Elaine watched the young maiden for a moment. There was something about her. Something that looked all to familiar. It was her eyes. “Some news? And how may I ask does it concern me?” 

[troubled-elaine]

Goodbye Camelot.

[troubled-elaine]

siegeperilleux:

Galahad still had some bruises and stiffness from slaying the kelpie, so even if he had not been in the habit of waking early to train he would not have been able to sleep too long. But once washed and dressed it was still a few hours until he would be needed for patrol, and he did not want to press himself too hard while he was healing, so he decided simply to take a walk. Maybe afterwards he would try and find Saraide; he had not seen his sister in a few days.

Althoughthe rubble had all been cleared away and the halls scrubbed clean, the evidence of the storm was still visible. Early morning sunlight came through holes in the roofs, and not all the doors and windows had yet been replaced. It would probably be months before it was completely fixed, and the village would likely take longer. Galahad shook his head sadly, and decided to turn towards the gardens. Although the ground had been torn up by the hail, the storm had hit before spring had come in properly and there were still plenty of blooms left beginning to flower.

As he came out of the doorway, however, a familiar group of figures stood further down the path made him stop. Looking at their clothing and Elaine’s expression, it wasn’t too hard to guess why they were here. “You’re leaving.”

Elaine had a small list of people she had wanted to see before she officially left the city. At the top of that list was Galahad. She still wasn’t quite sure how she was going to say good bye to him. Their relationship still wasn’t what she would have wanted it to be, but she had a duty in Gorre that she had to attend to. Looking over at him, a sort of sad smile spread across her lips. 

“Yes, I am.” She said casting her gaze down to her feet. “I leave in a few days. The storm has set back our journey. A few fallen trees in the road down to where the ship is going to take off from.” Shifting the weight of Rhys from one hip to the other she sighed. “I wanted to see you first, before I left.”