https://archiveofourown.org/works/86498096
Posting fanfiction publically for the first time rather than on Discord. Do not eat if allergic to doves 👀
AnasAbdin
styofa doing anything
Keni
taylor price
we're not kids anymore.

titsay
No title available

if i look back, i am lost
Peter Solarz
Mike Driver
will byers stan first human second
Misplaced Lens Cap
dirt enthusiast

oozey mess
🪼
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
RMH
One Nice Bug Per Day
almost home
art blog(derogatory)
seen from United States

seen from Netherlands

seen from United Kingdom

seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from Malaysia

seen from United States
seen from Türkiye

seen from United States

seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Singapore
seen from Canada
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Germany
seen from United States
seen from Argentina
@trouserbrowserramblings
https://archiveofourown.org/works/86498096
Posting fanfiction publically for the first time rather than on Discord. Do not eat if allergic to doves 👀
Carcass Clad predictions
Wrong Organ is releasing a new game and I'm intrigued. Set in what appears to be a post apocalyptic world, three survivors - Kanerva, Erkki, and Taisto - are forced to traverse through and escape an armed territory full of cultists and death. With both How Fish is Made to Mouthwashing, there are a few common elements: * Characters with nuanced motivations; * A bleak world, shown through a combination of dialogue and environmental storytelling; * Allegories to real world issues, despite the surreal or sci-fi nature of the games themselves; * A focus on moral choices with no explicit answers as to what is right or wrong. WO games often trust the player to interpret the narrative themselves by withholding information or presenting the truth indirectly, through symbolism and the mechanics of the game.
In the 1 minute trailer that just dropped, we can ascertain: * Parts of the world are mid or post conflict; * The voice actors speak Finnish, but there are signs written with cyrillic letters on red backrounds (and attatched to brutalist architecture) - reminiscent of Soviet Russia; * The main characters are in the midst of conflict, potentially setting up the story to be the result of war between the two neighbouring countries in the fight for territory/power; * Cattle are described as "divine". They are focal in many visual shots and their cries permeate the audio. Given the above, as well as the title directly referencing bodies (not restricted to cattle, it should be noted), I believe the main storyline will be about the consequences of war on humans and other animals caught in the crossfire. Despite being sacred, cattle are used as armour on machines of war regardless of whether they're alive. This sacriligeous treatment of gentle animals is a graphic reflection on the devaluation of life when wars break out. Throughout the story we may see civilians perish as an indirect result of our actions, or it may be directly enforced through gameplay a la Spec Ops: The Line (2012).
Continuing with the cattle motif, I predict that the three characters will be connected with the three main products of cattle slaughter - milk, skin, and flesh. Symbolism can be linked to each product, each product to a role, and this could tie in with their characterisation.
Kanerva is the milk. She provides for the crew. *Milk is produced for young animals to grow and survive. It is seen as an almost holy drink when taken by humans, forced to act as caretakers to humans by providing them with nourishment (and more cattle). *As the commander, Kanerva is forced to guide and command her crew through danger - like a mother cow with calves. According to her bio, she wants an "easy and glamourous life", a description not often attributed to motherhood. Leadership and responsibility may not be in her nature, yet it is the role she must take regardless. Erkii is the skin. He defends the crew. * Leather has been traditionally used as light armour for protection. It's thick and insulating, creating a barrier between body and weapon. The quality of leather and skin is correlated with moral strength; thin skin is worn by cowards and those with a fragile ego, while thick skin is donned by those with a tolerance to hardship. * As the gunner, Erkii is responsible for targetting who to kill in order to protect himself and the crew. He is the face of physical strength and morality. It was pointed out that Erkii is the only one whose description doesn't mention being enlisted/drafted. If Erkii is there on his own volition, he isn't being forced into war - he wants to be an actor in the conflict. He may have a personal motive for joining the war, but what we do know is he's a "survivor". A self-inflicted survivor and voluntary killer. In my mind, this makes Erkii a potential antagonist. Taisto it the meat. He is the body of the tank, and the story can't progress without its driver. * The first use of meat is for food. A life is taken to temporarily fuel the life of another. Alternatively, as shown in the trailer, cattle are used as a literal meat shield. In this case, lives are taken to delay the death of others. In both cases, lives are exchanged. Like in war, there are winners and losers in the push-pull of battle dynamics. Unlike in nature, the use of cattle is excessive to the point of cruelty. I believe this point will be supported as more of the game is seen and played, but already we see and hear cattle in excrutiating pain as seen in real life. "Real cows were harmed making this game," - I'm assuming the audio is taken from actual slaughterhouses for the discomfort of the player. * As the driver, Taisto obeys the commands of the 'higher ups'. He is not only physically placed below the others - he's in the cockpit with a limited field of view and must trust the other crew members judgements. If he gets conflicting orders, he must make a choice between them or refuse to act, yet either option places the responsibilities on his shoulders. He can't be blamed for misinformation or irrational choices present to him, but he must bare the consequences regardless. I predict he will be a sacrifice as some point, destined to lose because he was forced to play. A sacrifice, like the cattle adorning the tank. While Carcass Clad will be a survival co-operative, I'm excited to see how the story is set-up. Wrong Organ is skilled at fleshing out their stories through subtle world building and use of game mechanics to create a narrative. Though I have highly enjoyed the dialogue-heavy games of WO past, I hope fans of Wrong Organ through Mouthwashing and How Fish is Made can appreciate Carcass Clad as a unique experience when it comes out. :)
chat reminder to just write whatever the fuck you want. write that overused trope. write that obscure shit that no one will have heard of. just. do it. your writing is yours stop depriving it of that.
honestly in the era of AI slop it is more important than ever for you to write or draw that incredibly niche/strange/unpalatable thing you want to make. the world needs the unique weirdness of people more than ever
Shout out to my mom who explains my transition as "Having a daughterpillar turn into a Boyterfly". It doesn't erase the fact I was an adorable little girl, and also affirms my gender now. I love my mother.
at the point where im overanalyzing random lines my brain got stuck on but im currently going extremely brrrrr about curly's placating of jimmy being restriced to the second person in its wording. hes not even explicitly offering jimmy his help to get through whatever may come to him once they land. sure, he might still sorta kinda be there for him. i dont know. we never will. and i dont want to come off as insisting that curly is the kinda guy that can easily act on pure black and white logic and cut off jimmy without a second thought, or that hes all forgiving and that makes him a good person somehow. but i do get the vibe that curly did have a limit and he kinda did reach it when he connected the dots regarding anya. too bad jimmy turned the situation on him immediately by pushing more blame onto him than he would have deserved, victimizing him once again, paralyzing him and ridding him of the chance to do much about it all.
idkkk i think a lot about how jimmy systematically destroyed the last person that was willing to offer him a helping hand, even if he knew jimmy at least contributed to digging the holes he kept falling into. and i dont like how that thought could imply that curly is unconditionally forgiving in some net positive way. i dont think he is. if he was, jimmy would have simply relied on that instead of recognizing that curly was at the end of his rope supportwise and if he was still willing to help him at all, he was really on thin ice about it and the chances of that ice not cracking by the time they land are very close to zero. either way, the spider silk offered to him was about to snap and it was only a matter of time before he was going to fall back into hell.
thinking out loud, inwardly
braced; bare, brisk, born
you crawl from a wet cave
bleeding; burnt, buried, broken
peeling away from your roots
sprouting furs and feathers and scales
tongues, teeth, eyes, a brain
every string and bead strumming together
humming, inconsistently,
an equilibrium of rot and growth
birth and death, unending
but it all crashes together again
and you wake up again
in a dry bed
wrapped in cloth
oh, so afraid
at some point in your life you will be boiling fruit, water, sugar, and lemon juice in a pot to make a syrup or jam. the instructions will tell you to simmer for a certain amt of time. your timer will go off and you will look at the pot and go, "hm, this doesn't look thick enough. maybe i'll let it go for another 10 minutes." this is the devil speaking. it's only so liquid right now because it is at boiling point. it will thicken when it cools down. learn from the follies of my youth and do not let this happen to you
at some point in your life you will be making a sauce or a stew in which you need to add cornstarch to thicken it. and you will prepare a slurry of starch in cold water and think "this looks like way too little starch to thicken this amount of liquid." this is the devil speaking. cornstarch instantly polymerizes at 95°C and if you add too much it will turn into an impossibly thick goop.
at some point in your life you will be making some sort of cream based dessert that requires gelatin to thicken it. and you will soak some gelatin sheets in water and think "this is too few gelatin sheets for this amount of cream." this is the devil speaking. it will thicken in the fridge and if you add too much you will end up with milk jelly
at some point in your life you will be baking cookies. you will take the sheet out after twelve minutes as the recipe instructs and the cookies will still be glistening and soft. "these don't seem cooked enough," you will think to yourself, "i should place them back into the oven until their edges are nice and golden." this is the devil talking. this is how you get dry, overdone cookies. the cookies will continue to bake on the warm sheet for several more minutes and then harden up after sitting on a rack for a while. trust the process. trust the process.
at some point in your life you will be adding a small pasta to a soup and you will think "that is not enough small pasta." this is the devil talking. the pasta will absorb the stock and expand. this is how you end up with a soup that is a solid mass of soggy ditalini.
At some point in your life you will be adding garlic to a dish and you will think "that is not enough garlic." These are angels speaking. They are correct. Add more garlic.
I love Jimmy from mouthwashing. Both in the analytical way and also the "this is MY pathetic princess and I love him" way.
But now unfortunately that means that whenever someone asks me who my favorite mouthwashing character is I always have to either:
A: Lie and say it's Daisuke. (My second favorite. If I had to choose one)
Or B, try to justify myself when I say that Jimmy is my favorite. Like yeah sure, I'll say that he's an interesting character that deserves to be explored more than "comically evil bad villain guy."
But I mostly just think that he's a pathetic little cockroach man and Curly should stuff him like a turkey. His sobbing wet ugly cat energy deeply compelled me.
I don't want to die
Shoutout to Project Hail Mary for proving that platonic love is just as deep and profound and worthy as romantic or familial love
Listen, I love Bloodymary, and I know that the film doesn't talk about it in detail like the book does, but every time I see a twinkified Ryland Grace a piece of me dies.
In the book he's described as taller and "larger" than men like Yao even before he was put in the Hail Mary, and after that, when he was in the coma, his body was kept fit with electrodes to stimulate muscle movement. Translation: He's jacked.
In the movie he didn't have all those muscles just because Ryan Gosling is a fine ass man, but because that's how Ryland is supposed to look.
Just because he could trip over his own feet if someone let him, doesn't mean he's not strong as hell. Always in the book, after Rocky saves him by going out of his atmosphere, the one who brings him back there is Ryland. Now, the absence of gravity helped him a little, but still, Rocky weighs 370 pounds (about 168 kg) and is scorching hot. Grace made a harness and carried Rocky on his back, and then he horribly burned himself by putting him back on his side of the ship.
Now, body types can be very different, and there is nothing wrong in making a character like Simon more physically strong than Ryland. It could make sense all things considered, mutation and all. But making Ryland a twink shorter and so much weaker than Simon would be canonically incorrect.
The assumption that between two men in a relationship one has to be more manly and the other more feminine is a stereotype that orginates from homophobia and an attempt to make queer relationships more straight looking and so more easily acceptable for a mostly straight audience.
Especially if in doing so you also take away parts of his personality. Just because he's a nerd and generally very sweet doesn't mean he's not a little shit when he wants to be. In a very important and official conference he called someone a waste of Carbon. In the book, when he met another scientist that disagreed with him, he called her an idiot. He's very strong minded and very petty when given the opportunity to be. For the love of God, don't make him a poor baby who needs to be carried around and saved by a big strong man. He's smart as a whip and extremely competent, to the point where everyone considered him Stratt's number two. He's also, when the situation requires it, batshit insane. The fact that he cries a lot doesn't negate any of those things, nor it makes him less masculine.
hmmmmm finished the book and I'm chewing on Stratt characterization choices . . . already reblogged a post about how in the movie her sending Grace on the mission even though he begs her not to feels more like a betrayal and in the book it feels more like an inevitability, and this feels indicative of how in general the two versions take somewhat inverse approaches to her arc.
Which is to say, the movie tries to play a bait-and-switch, acting as if it's going to take the "stern, non-nonsense woman learns to open up" route: the slow build towards the vulnerability of the karaoke scene, shots of her and Grace looking at each other that seem like they might be headed for a romance plot—and then it plays her ruthlessness as a reveal. No, you were wrong about where this is going. They aren't going to kiss. She's going to drug him and send him on a suicide mission against his will for the good of the planet. And this is really effective!
But in the book we've known how ruthless she is for a long time. We see her taking drastic actions on-page and we know she'll do anything for the mission (and Grace knows it too). What we haven't seen is any hint of vulnerability . . . until their very last conversation. That's the first and only time we see the cracks in her facade, as she wraps her arms around herself and talks about how she studied history, how she knows that death and war and famine are coming and that the Hail Mary is their only hope for survival. She never explains herself, but she tries here, finally, desperate to make Grace understand what's at stake. She's frightened. She's spent years in control of everything and the only thing more terrifying than that is that as soon as the Hail Mary launches she'll have no control anymore. It will be out of her hands and in his and he doesn't even want to do it. She's been the picture of iron self-control for the whole book and it's only at the very end that we get a glimpse of all those messy human emotions that she keeps tamped down. For the most part I think the book struggles to evoke the same intensity of emotion as the movie does, but this scene hits.
I don't have a snappy conclusion I am mostly just rotating her in my mind but I think it's really neat how despite having some similar elements the two versions take such opposite approaches to them and that they both work as well as they do!
Caine and a bubble Caine and Abel
I was wondering how you think of the parts when Jimmy is somewhat nice to Anya, even in times when they're alone? Like when she was contemplating drinking mouthwash, he accidentally startles her and apologizes and Im not sure how I feel about it. I know that despite all the narcissistic crap he does, he's still just a guy so likes- just curious as to how you interpret it. Anya is casual around Jimmy because I believe yk like she's basically forced the be around him, so she just has to tolerate him. Do you think that's how Jimmy is towards Anya too? Like- he just has to tolerate her because he's stuck with her?
That's just being human yeah. Jimmy is a realistic depiction of an abuser, that means he acts like humans do and no one consists of only their worst moments (like Anya would probably say). Jimmy isn't aware of his own horribleness, in his mind I would say yeah, he tolerates Anya, or rather "has to deal with her".
I honestly view their relationship as "long term acquaintance" level whose relationship went bitter and rotted over the years in space isolation. Not friends, but people who just know each other but can't get away if they wanted to (and they want to).
There's more moments than you mentioned that show their relationship is more than just hostile strangers or "victim and abuser". Like how Anya they both call each other by name and not title, especially Anya who calls him "Jim" (and the only other person to do so is Curly). The fact that Anya asks Jimmy to take over pills duty, which I really doubt you would do if all you knew of the person was how horrible and violent they were, or if you didn't have at least some fraction of faith they will do it right in your stead. The fact that she's willing to talk to Jimmy about the pregnancy one on one! Alone! Clearly somehow she keeps believing he's not devil incarnate despite everything!
And one detail I can't stop thinking about is that Jimmy keeps bringing up her incompetence and failure to get into med school again and again in the same way he brings up words said in private by Curly to use them against him. Basically using moments of vulnerability where the person confides in him as weapons against them. Opening up the possibility that there were more of these moments where the two of them just talk, Anya making the grave mistake of mentioning her lack of education to Jimmy. And it now forever haunts her. I know it's speculation and headcanons but! I like the idea and it makes sense to me, Way more than them being complete strangers.
so embarrassing when i forget im checking someone's blog and i start scrolling through and liking and reblogging shit as if it's just my dash. it feels like wandering into someone else's apartment and not noticing and making myself lunch
reblog if i can wander into your apartment (blog) and make myself lunch (like and reblog as if it's my dash)
There's something to be said about how Pony Express enables rape culture and negligence within the story of Mouthwashing. I've seen a lot of analysis on Jimmy and Curly and how they are both complicit in what happened to Anya, but it's scarily accurate how the company neglects their workers so poorly that it played a part in encouraging the events of the game too.
The lack of locks on the sleeping quarters, but only on rooms that the company sees as valuable to their own profits (the cockpit and medbay). How HR complaints about harassment or discomfort in a crew means everyone gets punished, even the one who reported the complaint. How nurses aren't given any psych evaluations or safety nets. Punishment for sleeping over five hours and leaving the crew sleep deprived and less aware of their surroundings. The lack of safety protocols for leaving one person in the cockpit alone with complete access to turning off auto-pilot while the captain isn't around. No emergency plan for Curly if any threats or disturbances happen on the ship, and only given a gun, which is going to escalate things even quicker into violence and panic compared to a containment cell. No way for Anya or any of the crew, excluding the captain, to personally protect themselves from internal threats, either.
You can see how these lack of regulations affects the way the crew engage with one another. How Swansea tries to tell Anya to hold on for a little longer rather than choosing to commit violence on Jimmy at the spot, how Anya is disillusioned by Curly being able to help her to begin with despite his captain status, and how Curly's fear of Jimmy doing something drastic enough to hurt other people leads him to not rock the boat rather than choose the safety of the person who needs it the most.
Pony Express as a company doesn't care about its workers, we know this, but every lack of security, policy, and guideline actively encourages people like Jimmy to continue abusing others, and for higher-ups like Curly to decide indecision rather than protecting loved ones
When you try to talk about enshittification, it sounds like conspiracy theories. (I'm not crazy)
Amazon made their service worse, to force people to pay for Prime.
Nowadays, if you order from Amazon, there is a week long delay before your package is shipped. (on purpose)
I remember when orders would ship out the same day. (I remember - it was real)
YouTube didn't used to have ads. Now, ads play in the middle of videos. (it's worse than TV ever was)
The best can opener I have owned is over 40 years old. Modern ones just don't hold up as well. (The ones I bought new broke ages ago)
The bread machine my mom got for her wedding lasted 30 years. It's been replaced twice in the last 5 years. (How can you fuck this up?)
The cardboard tubes in the middle of toilet paper rolls have gotten larger. (This too?) Companies increasing the price of the product while selling you less. (REALLY?)
It sounds crazy. (it's the truth) When you talk about it, YOU sound crazy. (it's true)
Even when people believe you (do they really), all they can say is "it sucks". (it's too big) Because the problem is so big, so pervasive, what can we even DO about it???
To get the necessary laws written and passed, we need politicians, to get the politicians elected we need information campaigns, to fund campaigns we need money, and all the money is being hoarded by the people profiting from enshittification. (it sounds so fake)
So I talk about enshittification (it sounds crazy), so people don't forget that things have been made worse on purpose (it's true), even though I sound crazy. (maybe I am)