• The opening is that monologue page of Yashiro looking up the one the official account posted.
• On page 2, the official account only posted the top panel, but below that, there was Yashiro saying: "Is there anything scarier than that?"
• Then there’s a knock on the door.
• A subordinate tells him that Misumi is here.
• Yashiro answers reluctantly
• Misumi was worried about Yashiro being at the shooting scene and he also knew Doumeki had acted as Yashiro’s shield
• Yashiro: "Where do you even hear this stuff?"
• Misumi: "Don’t underestimate my information network."
• Misumi says Doumeki is clearly obsessed with Yashiro and asks Yashiro if he has any intention of accepting Doumeki.
• Yashiro: "I’ve never even thought about it." (smh)
• Misumi: "I see… good."
• Then Misumi mentions that because Doumeki acted as Yashiro’s shield, it completely ruined Tsunakawa’s pride, and no one knows how Tsunakawa will deal with Doumeki. So Misumi orders Yashiro, more than just "advises" to keep away from Doumeki.
• And Misumi didn’t come only to talk about Doumeki. They talk about Yakuza stuff
• Basically, Misumi wants Yashiro to do as he pleases as long as he also catches Kai while he’s retrieving the gun, creating a debt and also shutting up the higher-ups who hate Yashiro.
• After Misumi leaves, Yashiro thinks: "He’s totally keeping me like a pet. 'Right-hand man' my ass."
• Then Yashiro gets a call from Nanahara.
• Nanahara ran into Doumeki being carried in (with a high fever) when he went to bring payment to Dr. Kageyama. (What happened after the end of the last chapter)
• He also tells Yashiro that Kamiya and the others found Kai’s location.
•Yashiro asks if Doumeki is still with Kageyama, but Nanahara says Doumeki was sent home.
• Nanahara: "What should we do? We gotta find the gun before Sakura starts a shootout."
• Yashiro: "I know. I’ll go poke around."
• Nanahara: "Got it."
• Yashiro: "Just poke around. That’s all."
• Scene changes to Doumeki’s apartment hallway.
• Kamiya is carrying Doumeki.
• And then the club Mama appears…!
• She helps Kamiya support Doumeki.
• Kamiya: "Nothing in this room, huh? You come here often?"
• Mama: "…No."
• Kamiya: "Surprising. I thought you two were dating."
• Mama: "…"
• While Kamiya is explaining what Doumeki did (using his body to shield Yashiro), Yashiro is standing right at Doumeki’s door
• Kamiya: "But yeah, it makes no sense. Even if they’re old acquaintances..."
• Doorbell rings.
• Yashiro is standing there. Mama turns to look at him.
• Kamiya asks if Yashiro came to check on Doumeki. Yashiro says he heard Doumeki had a fever. Mama watches them talk. Doumeki wakes up
• Just when Yashiro is about to leave,
• Mama: "Um, if you’d like..."
• But Doumeki suddenly gets up, passes by Mama, grabs Yashiro’s arm and
• Doumeki: "Please… wait… don’t… go…"
• He can’t stand, so he drops to one knee 😭
• Kamiya: "What the hell, man? Just go lie down."
• Mama: "Kamiya-san, let’s go."
• She grabs Kamiya and drags him out, passing Yashiro.
• We get a panel of Yashiro looking at Doumeki, and Doumeki suffering from the fever
In the car:
• Kamiya: "You sure it’s okay? Leaving your man while he’s weak?"
• Mama: "It’s fine. It was a lie." (OMGGG!!!!)
• Kamiya: "Wait, so you weren’t visiting his place all the time?"
• Mama: "Not like that."
• Kamiya: "…Why lie, then?"
• Mama: "…It was just more convenient that way."
• A panel of Mama tattooing Doumeki’s back (I KNEW it)
• Mama: "He has someone else he cares about. I kind of knew."
• She then says she wants to do something else with her life, so she’ll close the shop.
_________________________
Omfg. SO MUCH happened this chapter.
When Misumi asks:
"Do you have any intention of accepting him?"
And Yashiro says:
"I’ve never even thought about it."
💀 LIE.
Huge lie.
Misumi’s "Good" is chilling.
He’s relieved. 100% because Yashiro having attachments threatens his usefulness.
"He’s totally keeping me like a pet."
This is such a raw line. Dark underneath. Yashiro recognizing he’s being handled like property.
Doumeki grabbing Yashiro’s arm while collapsing to one knee. Begging him to not go, is the most openly desperate Doumeki has EVER been. Especially after the time skip.
It’s pure attachment.
Pure fear of abandonment.
Pure "don’t leave me again."
This scene is the emotional core of the chapter.
Misumi ➡️ keeps him like a pet
Doumeki ➡️ collapses begging him not to go
Mama ➡️ quietly steps aside
Everyone is reacting emotionally.
Yashiro is the only one publicly pretending not to feel anything.
The ✨drama✨ is ✨drama-ing✨ fr this chapter.
Hopefully they COMMUNICATE next chapter and make Yashiro's birthday next year an amazing one!!! 🤞🤞
Here's D making my favorite face from the chapter. He KNOWS:
SPOILERS AHEAD
Okuyama is really growing on me. I think his characterization is an interesting foil to a lot of the other characters. He seems like a careful and actually caring man who truly believes in what the yakuza is and means as an organization/way of life. And the way he calls Kai out is super satisfying. lol
Also poor D! Kamiya is such a snarky little butthole lol
I can't wait to see how Y reacts when D can finally confront him about his right eye. Not to mention how Y will freak out at Kage when he realizes it was Kage who spilled the beans lol
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For folks who were worried about me, thank you for sending kind words. I'm sorry to have caused y'all stress!
If you're curious about what happened, and at the risk of getting too personal - my partner has been suffering a pretty severe and total mental break. All my brain power basically went into supporting him and making sure we can still pay our bills while he's figuring it all out over the past few months and also the cherry on top is that I'm pregnant (!!!!11lkasjdfk). I do mean that sarcastically as well as earnestly - I'm very happy to be expecting another child, but the timing is.... a lot. lol
Folks who have been following me for a while know that we lost our first child basically right after birth and with my partner being in such an incredibly fragile state at the moment, there's just... a lot of feelings all around.
So anyway! All that's to say thanks for being patient.
Chapter 63 is already released in Japan. I've read it and scanned it but I still need to clean and translate/typeset. I really wanted to get a summary out for ch 62, but it didn't end up happening and I'm sorry for saying I'd do it and not doing it. I don't plan to do a summary this time around for ch 63 either because I simply don't have the capacity 🙇 and I'd rather use that energy on getting the chapter out anyway!
Also! Yoneda-Sensei's name is on the list for the next issue (coming out on January 30th) so we can all look forward to chapter 64 as well <3
Hi y'all - sorry for the late summary - my ihr HertZ magazine just got to my door pretty late so I couldn't provide a summary until now because I hadn't read it myself! lol
As we suspected, the plot for this one is very yakuza centric. Summary below the cut for those who wish to avoid spoilers.
First we have the glorious title page with that lovely illustration of D putting his (gloved!) fingers into Y's mouth with the chapter text "The buried past emerges". Sadly, this is the only interaction between D and Y we see this time.
The chapter opens with D and Kamiya standing guard outside a hospital. D chastises Kamiya for smoking in a non-smoking area and Kamiya retorts that D shouldn't care about such things since he's yakuza. Kamiya goes on to say that D takes things too seriously, just like the club mama [Izumi-san]. (This remark about the club mama was actually on the sneak peek page, but I somehow fully missed it when I did the quick translation post, whoopsie lol)
Kamiya continues to ask if D and the mama are having sex, to which D responds with "Is that what she said?" Kamiya confirms that he knows D is going to her house so D responds that it must be the case (that they're having sex).
They're interrupted by Tsunakawa arriving by car. It's revealed that Tsunakawa has come to the hospital to see Okuyama. Tsunakawa speaks to Okuyama as he lies in his hospital bed, "You look so frail."
Meanwhile, the story turns to Yamakawa (the dude who Kai has been holding on to, that originally Sakuraikka and Yashiro were both searching for, in case you need a refresher lol). A small fire has started in the building he's being held in and he uses the opportunity to try to flee. However, he's caught on the stairwell by Nana and Yashiro (I assume they started the fire, sneaky assholes). Yashiro explains that they are neither Sakuraikka or Okuyamagumi members and then offers Yamakawa a deal (that we readers aren't allowed to know T.T).
Back at the hospital, Tsuna and Okuyama get to the matter of Tsuna's daughter's kidnapping. Tsuna says that Okuyama resented him for supplanting Okuyama as Sakuraikka's head and that's why Oku kidnapped Niki. Okuyama dodges the question and by saying that if Tsuna's dad hadn't decided to stop the hereditary succession within Sakuraikka then Okuyama would still be a member. Tsuna seems thrown by this but skeptical and asks if Okuyama is trying to say that he never had the ambition to become kumichou to begin with.
Okuyama looks contemplative and admits that there were only a few people willing to part with Sakuraikka (and Tsuna's vigorous leadership) in order to follow him. (By the way, Okuyama is speaking to Tsuna very politely this whole time while Tsuna is using casual, rough Japanese.)
He explains that soon after leaving to start his own group he discovered his cancer. Kai, who we know was one of the people who left Sakuraikka with Okuyama, ran rampant during this time and did whatever he wanted. As a result he was arrested for a petty crime but released after his sentence was suspended.
Okuyama recalls the first and only time Kai came to see him in the hospital. Kai is beside himself with rage (at seeing Okuyama in such a weakened state?). Okuyama tells Tsuna that his daughter was kidnapped after that happened (he's implying that Kai did it all on his own).
Tsuna seems to accept this but asks Okuyama how he plans to hold Kai accountable as his underling. Okuyama doesn't answer immediately so Tsuna offers to do it himself. Okuyama muses glumly that Tsuna plans to kill Kai and says that he doesn't plan to hold Kai accountable himself (implying that Tsuna can do it if he wants).
Okuyama asks if that's all Tsuna has come for, to which Tsuna replies that he also wanted to know why Okuyama offered to look after Kai in the first place, since it's so unlike him. It's revealed that Kai is in fact the son of an imprisoned kumichou of a Kansai group. Apparently, Okuyama owes this kumichou a lot so after receiving a letter from prison asking Okuyama to look after Kai, Okuyama obliged.
After hearing about Kai, Tsuna asks why Okuyama doesn't seem to want to stop him from killing Kai. Okuyama smiles weakly and says he knows it would do no good.
Tsuna seems satisfied by this and turns to leave but is stopped by Okuyama who asks if there was any other reason he came. Tsuna turns to look over his shoulder and says as he walks out, "Ah, I just came to pay my respects to those unbalanced scales of yours."
Okuyama has an unreadable expression (shock? shame? anger?) on his face as he watches Tsuna leave. After he's gone, Okuyama orders one of his men to find Kai.
Tsuna meets with D and Kamiya who have been waiting outside the hospital. He orders them to tell the other members to go after Kai and Ryuuzu but to leave Okuyamagumi alone, as long as they don't try to help Ryuuzu.
END OF SUMMARY
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Whew! So Okuyama wasn't as much of a dickhead as we thought, it seems. I wonder if we'll get to learn more about Kai's family? I also still really wonder about the damn money that D took - could it have anything to do with any Kansai groups? That seems like a stretch... What complicated webs you weave, Yoneda-sensei! *shakes fist*
I'm rambling because it's midnight here. lol
On a related note, please forgive my inevitable typos.
Anyway - I know I alway say this, but please give me a bit of extra time on this chapter as it's a busy time for me right now. 💜
Oh, also, Yoneda-sensei is confirmed to be in the next release as well so we'll have another chapter on January 31st! Woo!
I was gonna wait until the next chapter comes out to release these, but I thought we could all use a little Saezuru pick me up.
I'm only posting these as a mediafire download for now, but I'll also include these extras at the end of ch 59 when it comes out later this month, which will be posted on Mangadex as well. <3
DL Volume 9 extras
Everyone say thank you to @kayura452 for providing the raws! It made me realize I really need a scanner. lol
Here's an ominous aura D since it is technically still Halloween somewhere, haha.
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Unrelated to the extras- thank you to folks who have sent me asks recently - I'm just too busy to answer at the moment! I'll try to get to them when I have a bit more time. <3
Okay, I got interrupted yesterday while I was reading the chapter and I had a teaching appointment today but here we go- I finally have a summary for y'all.
This chapter has sooo much information in it, like wow, it's dense. There's a detailed summary below the cut.
Also I think it will take a day or two longer than usual to get the chapter out because there's a lot of text this time and I want to make sure I don't mess anything up (like I usually do lolol)
SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT
First we see the title page with Yashiro sitting crosslegged, smoking a cigarette and looking at a little sparrow.
"With feelings left behind" is written above the sparrow.
The chapter opens with Tsunakawa arriving at Doushinkai's main office with Muraji. Tsunakawa and Muraji meet Misumi and Amou together in a private room.
Misumi seems quite friendly and even brings up Tsunakawa's golf hobby saying Tsuna hasn't been in a while (with Amou, I assume). Tsuna says he hasn't been able to go because of the trouble Sakuraikka has been experiencing in the past year (alluding to the kidnapping of Niki and the injury he suffered afterward). Misumi doesn't remember (or likely pretends not to remember), even though Doushinkai apparently sent a "get-well" gift for Tsuna. Misumi says Amou probably sent the gift himself (lol).
Tsuna suddenly asks why Misumi had Yashiro investigate Okuyamagumi, saying he doesn't like to beat around the bush. Misumi agrees to tell Tsuna, bringing up the favor Tsuna did for Doushinkai 4 years ago (the Hirata incident and Tsuna's role in helping Doushinkai get rid of Goudagumi which operated under Sanwakai, the same umbrella group that Sakuraikka is affiliated with).
Misumi explains that Doushinkai's branch group, Akutsugumi (thank fuck it's not another K group lol), was attacked by Ryuuzu during a weapons procurement and that 28 guns were stolen by Ryuuzu. This also led to a series of squabbles throughout Doushinkai's territory. Misumi continues to say that usually he wouldn't get involved in something like that (because he's the big BIG boss and that matter isn't that big of a deal) but he views the stolen weapons as a major threat to Doushinkai. He goes on to say that if Doushinkai's own weapons were used against them it would result in their reputation being destroyed - especially if it were Ryuuzu using the weapons since they're under Kyokuseikai (極星会).
Tsuna says he knows about Doushinkai's longstanding relationship with Kyokuseikai. Misumi says that the dispute between Doushinkai and Kyokuseikai may be ancient but the embers are still burning.
(!!! Here we learn that the relationship between Kyokuseikai and Doushinkai was a bad one.)
Tsuna says, "Well of course, the boss is still alive" implying that Misumi is ancient. (Up until this line Tsuna has been using very polite Japanese, but here he switches to more casual Japanese making it even more funny.) Misumi is annoyed but takes it as a joke.
(I love their dynamic lol, btw Misumi speaks very casually to Tsuna because he's older and his rank is higher)
Tsuna says that Okuyama may be under Kyokuseikai now but he was originally part of Sakuraikka. He goes on to request that Doushinkai "pass the flower" to Sakuraikka and allow them to pursue the matter solo. (The expression Tsuna uses is 花を持たせる - directly translated is "let someone hold the flower" - which means to allow someone else to take the glory/credit. There are going to be a lot of translator notes for this chapter I think. lol)
Misumi says that expression is very "yakuza" of Tsuna to which Tsuna replies that he feels like Misumi is comparing him to someone. Misumi asks who and Tsuna says, "Yashiro, your cute son." Misumi gets annoyed and says that Yashiro isn't his son but his 愛人 mistress. (this can be translated as lover as well, but this word carries a very heavy connotation that the lover is an extra lover, outside of wedlock so I feel the most appropriate word is mistress. Also it's funnier and this line is definitely supposed to be humorous lol)
Tsuna pushes a bit more and says that Yashiro's special treatment from Misumi must be nice. Misumi seems a little surprised that it seems like he gives Yashiro special treatment. Tsuna adds that he can understand the desire to give a little extra to his favorite subordinates, after all there's a subordinate that he's fond of - Doumeki.
(!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Why Tsuna, why?? and in front of Amou, too.)
Misumi is very surprised and asks Tsuna if he heard him right. "Doumeki Chikara" Tsuna says, leaving no room for doubt. Misumi demands to know why Doumeki is at Sakuraikka and then it dawns on him that Amou probably had something to do with it. Amou slinks away to make more tea (lol), thinking he'll have to kill Tsuna later.
While Tsuna is laughing, Misumi demands that Tsuna throw out Doumeki, asking what's so good about him anyway. Tsuna asks if something happened with Doumeki to which Misumi replies "I should be asking that!! To think he was at the place I asked Yashiro to investigate..."
Tsuna asks Misumi if he hadn't heard about Doumeki from Yashiro. Misumi makes the excuse that Yashiro doesn't tell him every single little thing. (But is thinking that Y is a fucker for hiding that info from him.) Tsuna pushes again and says it doesn't seem like a little thing. Tsuna asks why Misumi cares about such a small fry like Doumeki at all. "That's true" Misumi says, seeming to not really know himself.
(So interesting - Misumi himself is unaware of the reason for his great distain for Doumeki! Or at least doesn't seem to want other to know)
Later, when Muraji and Tsunakawa are returning in the car Muraji asks if Doumeki did something bad to which Tusna says that he wants to know too. Tsuna remembers Misumi's line "To think he was at the place I asked Yashiro to investigate" and realizes that Yashiro is somehow connected to Misumi's dislike of Doumeki.
Tsuna calls Doumeki who is with Kamiya still out looking for Ryuuzu members and Okuyama. Doumeki reports that they've discovered who Nishio is (Kai's underling) but haven't been able to find him yet. He also reports that they've discovered Okuyama's whereabouts. We see a side view of Tsunakawa's face with a serious (murderous?) expression while D shares the whereabouts (which aren't actually written out).
Next we cut to Yashiro with Nanahara in Kageyama's office (this is the second sneak peek btw, the one with Y and Kage). Kageyama is stitching up one of Yashiro's casino staff who has been attacked by Ryuuzu guys. (The dude is being really noisy so Yashiro directs Nanahara to stuff a sock in his mouth, and Nana does lol)
Nana says he wants Yashiro to avoid going near the casino for a while since the Ryuuzu guys are likely after him. Yashiro says that they're after him because he's part of Doushinkai so it's pointless to hide (I think he means that on principle he shouldn't be hiding in order not to damage his reputation while also meaning that hiding would be ineffective since they already know his affiliation).
Kageyama seems surprised that Y is still involved with Doushinkai and urges him to get out. Yashiro says there's such a thing as sakazuki (the sake exchange that bonds you to your yakuza dad/boss) and it's not that simple (also that he doesn't intend to get out).
Nana points out that Y was instructed by Misumi not to get involved at the moment. Yashiro says that's just Tsunakawa's selfish request that Misumi decided to grant, while remembering the nagging phone call he got from Misumi about Y's silence regarding Doumeki.
Yashiro stretches in his seat and the magazine he was reading falls to the floor. He bends down to pick it up but his depth perception is messed up because of his loss of vision in his right eye so his hand misses. Kage notices this and asks if Y's eye is alright. Yashiro immediately get's upset at Nana who admits to telling Kageyama about Yashiro's eye (lol).
They're interrupted by Kuga entering the room. We learn that Kuga is now a motorcycle mechanic and has left night work because it didn't suit him (he used to be a "black suited staff member" - a security person at a club). Kuga brings up Doumeki and asks what he's up to these days. Nana is defensive and asks why Kuga brought D up. Y has a deadpan look of annoyance on his face. Kuga explains that he brought it up because his friend who still does club work met a yakuza guy named Doumeki who was searching for someone (probably Nishio) but Kuga was incredulous as to whether it was that Doumeki. Yashiro confirms that D is in fact a member of the yakuza these days.
Kuga and Kageyama are both very surprised to hear this as they thought that after the Hirata incident Doumeki had gotten out of the yakuza. They ask if Yashiro has seen D since then and Y says, "Many times, on minor business" (lolololol minor business my ass). Kuga expresses his surprise again saying he felt that if anyone isn't suited for the Yakuza it's Doumeki.
Yashiro begins to flash back to the previous weeks - showing us scenes of D coming to visit Y for sex. Laid over the flashback are Y's words:
"I'll come again"
Just as he said
Even though he's busy, on a manhunt
Suddenly, as if stitching the moments together*, he would surely come
Without a word
Without any meaning
Really, feeling as if that's all there was
Time after time
Again
And again
He would come
And leave
(*the expression "stitching moments together" 合間を縫う is an idiom that means to make good use of your spare time but I'm choosing to leave it as is in order to hopefully stay truer to the source material. Also I think "stitching moments together" sounds nice ^^)
We return to the present and Kuga says again that D really isn't cut out to be a yakuza. Kuga turns to Y and says that Y surely thought the same and that's why he kicked D out 4 years ago. Kage cautions Kuga to stop talking. Y responds that D was simply of no use and that's why he was discarded.
Y stands up to leave with Nana (leaving the patient for Kage to deal with lol). As Y is walking out Kage stops him. Y assumes it's about the payment for the medical work done on his staff but Kage says it isn't. Kage asks if Y is okay. Y again misunderstands, this time assuming Kage is talking about his vision. Y says it's fine and Kage says he's also worried about Y's eye (while adjusting his own glasses in a nervous way). Y still doesn't get it for a moment and then realizes that Kage is referring to Doumeki. Kage is asking if Y is alright knowing that D is still in the yakuza and now that D is back in his life. Y flashes back to the scene at the end of volume 5 (ch 28) when Kage says to Yashiro "You were in love with him, right?" in reference to Doumeki. We also see a flashback of D from 4 years ago saying "Kashira"
Back in the present Y has turned his back on Kage and says "An old man like you shouldn't worry about such disgusting things." Kage chides back that Y is an old man, too.
It has started to rain and as Y walks past a rain streaked window he remembers the scene from volume 6 (ch 33) when Y asks D what it feels like to fall in love. We see a close up of the lower half of Y's face as he grits his teeth and says, "Give me a break, truly"
-END SUMMARY-
*sigh* So much in only 25 pages.
Also so many things to think about! Did Tsunakawa just royally fuck D over by telling Misumi about him being in Sakuraikka?
Will Doushinkai really withdraw completely from the Okuyamagumi/Kyokuseikai/Ryuuzu cluster fuck?
Did Tsunakawa put the whole puzzle together and realize that D and Y were involved in a way other than boss and subordinate?
How self aware is Y about his feelings for D??
Yoneda Sensei's name is not on the list of author's for the next issue which means we've probably come to the end of volume 9. This is sad because it means we won't have new chapters of Saezuru for a while (my guess is September, but who knows), but at least we can look forward to a new drama cd and the volume being released this year (probably).
Oh hohoho you guys. This chapter is a little shorter (21 pages including the title page) but it's full of sex so that makes up for it lol
I'm going to do my best to write this summary but as I just said, it's all sex so I don't know how well I'm gonna do. 💀
Detailed summary under the cut- SPOILERS ABOUND
The chapter opens right were ch 56 left off - Doumeki is on top of Yashiro, passionately kissing him.
Y seems to be overcome by D's passion and eventually pushes him away lightly saying he's had enough kissing. D has a look of slight desperation? Exasperation? Disappointment? in his eyes. He doesn't listen to Y and instead continues to kiss him, restraining Y's wrists above his head. Y attempts to protest but only gets out half of D's name before D's tongue is down his throat again.
D lifts Y's hips and their dicks touch. D proceeds to take both their dicks in his hand (the mythical double dick hand job!). Y makes a very lewd expression while he watches this and let's it happen for a while before he puts his hand over D's and stops him saying that D should just hurry up and put it in.
D again doesn't listen and bends down to lick Y's nipple while continuing to give Y a hand job. Y asks "Aren't you going to be cruel?" D ignores the question and takes Y in his mouth. Y protests saying again that it was enough, implying that he wants D to hurry up and put it in.
D kisses Y's thigh and right then Y has a flashback to the first time they had sex (the panel where D is kissing Y's ankle from ch 24). Y suddenly shoves D away. He has a look on his face like he's surprised at his own actions, huffing and out of breath. D just looks at him with a calm (like, too calm) expression then pulls Y back to him by his wrist.
Y recoils and pulls his wrist out of D's hand yelling, "You really are persistent". D sighs and says, "If you want to throw up, go ahead."
There's a slight time skip (it's almost like Y kind of blanks out for a moment). D is behind Y about to put it in. Y looks deeply distressed and very panicked. D is balls deep fucking Y sideways. Y's face melts into another lewd expression. D is gazing at Y's neck and shoulders from the back - but he wants to see Y's face (aw). D's expression softens as he takes Y's wrist and places it behind D's head so Y's arm is embracing D. D goes in for another kiss - Y's hand is hovering near the nape of D's neck, not quite touching him, while D's hand is cradling the back of Y's head (by the way this panel has an intense view of their nether regions, probably the most explicit panel Yoneda sensei has ever given us, but I was way more concerned with the hands lolol)
They kiss passionately, Y's hand continues to hover near the nape of D's neck until hesitantly resting on it (mostly out of frame - Yoneda Sensei you story telling genius).
They change positions so D is completely on top of Y. Y looks up at D's intense facial expression and laughs lightly. While reaching up toward D's face gently, Y says, "You're making a face like you want to do it really badly" (calling back to Volume 1 ch 1 😭). D responds, taking Y's hand in his, "What a nostalgic thing to say." Y doesn't understand what D's referring to (or at least seems to not understand).
D thrusts into Y as he bends down for another kiss, again holding Y's wrists above his head, against the pillows.
"And what about you?" Doumeki asks, implying that Y is also making a face like he wants to do it really badly. "Of course I'm not" Y protests softly drowning in D's kiss.
D continues to fuck the living daylights out of Y. Y objects but only half heartedly, commanding weakly under Doumeki's gaze that D stop looking at him while simultaneously wrapping his arms and legs tightly around D.
Time skips forward a bit more. They're finished and D is dressing, putting on his gloves and jacket. "I'll come again" D says. "To have sex?" Y asks snarkily. D just looks at him silently then leaves.
Y pulls out a cigarette and we get his inner monologue*:
As always, I'm such a contradiction.
Even though I blame him for being cruel,
The moment I'm treated with kindness I want to run away.
In spite of that, I can't help myself - I feel it (I get aroused and into it)
Human's are creatures of change,
But in my case, I'm just an unchanging animal (livestock) completely incapable of growth.
(*I might tweak this translation)
END OF SUMMARY
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Wooo boy, what a chapter. Y is so self aware! What the hell is D thinking?? Their peepees touched so much!
Yoneda-Sensei is slated to have another chapter in the next issue of ihr Hertz out on May 31st. She's also going to do the cover art so that's super exciting! She usually takes a break once a full volume is done so the fact that she's not taking a break is a sign that volume 9 is still ongoing (epic!)
Anyway - I'll get this chapter out asap but I have a lot of other work to focus on, too, so I appreciate your patience <3
Ho. Ly. SHIT you guys are going to freak the fuck out over this chapter. While reading most of it I was just shouting various expletives into the ether in my apartment lol
There's a detailed summary under the cut for those who wish to avoid spoilers ^^
The text in the sneak peek was D's inner monologue - here's a more accurate translation now that I have seen the whole text: "I've concealed my emotions, so that this person won't run away". He takes the cigarette from Y and LIGHTS THE DAMN THING. Y asks him how it tastes and D responds that it's "sweet and bitter - it tastes like you" (WTFing hell I'm dead already).
Y makes fun of D for saying such a sappy thing. D whips out the memory card saying he got it from Inami and asks Y if he knows what's on it. Y does indeed know what's on it and asks D if he's watched it, maintaining a "I don't give a fuck" attitude. D says he hasn't watched it. Y asks him if he'd like to watch, to which D asks if it's really okay to watch it. Y goads D on, saying he's not embarrassed (Y still doesn't understand what D's getting at, or at least is pretending to not understand.)
D says that Y is pretty different when he has sex with Inami compared with when D and Y have sex. Y still doesn't get it and responds that it's just that kind of play with Inami. D then spells it out very clearly that he's referring to Y's impotence. Y looks surprised and then brushes it off saying it doesn't matter if he doesn't get hard - the sex isn't for his benefit, it's for Inami's.
D responds by asking why, then, does Y get such satisfaction from the sex that D and Y have? Y doesn't have a sassy come back. D continues by asking if Y remembers how many times he (Y) came the last time D and Y had sex. Y says he doesn't and D says he also doesn't remember. Y takes this as a jab and makes the excuse that his body just had chemistry with D's and that's why he came so much.
D asks when Y's body started to have such chemistry with his. Y dodges the question by asking what D will do if he hears the answer. Y continues on to say (sarcastically) that D has built a satisfying life for himself with a woman and everything. D responds by saying it's unexpected of Y to take such an interest in D's life (D's FACE IN THIS PANEL IS KILLING ME... 🥲 probably the closest thing to a smile we've seen from D but also he looks like he's about to cry). Y realizes his slip and gets up, trying to end the conversation.
D tries to pull Y back but Y snaps and says that his life is none of D's business. Y continues, saying there's no reason for D to do it with him any more and why doesn't he go off and do it with his woman.
D pushes Y against the wall and tells him that just like how Y and Inami's sex is none of D's business, who D has sex with is none of Y's business, isn't that right? Y agrees. Y asks what D's aim is - to confirm that Y can't get it up with anyone except D and take pity on him? To which D responds "You want to do it with me, don't you?" (!!!!!!!!)
Y tries to protest, but D pulls him closer. Y says, "You were only doing it for my sexual gratification, what benefit was there to you?" (Wow, Yashiro is so unbelievably deluded lol). D responds that it wasn't just Y's body that experienced chemistry, it was mutual. (This is the panel from the second sneak peek, btw)
Y continues to protest, saying it was terrible for D to do such a thing under the pretext of his duty (as a member of Sakuraikka). D asks if Y disliked it, slipping his leg between Y's thighs. Y says that D said some cruel things to him (during their sexual encounters) and D says 酷いの好きでしたよね (You liked cruel things, didn't you?). Y responds …好きだよ (I like it [you]). (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
D is absolutely shocked by this (indirect) confession and kisses Y ferociously. We then get about 12 pages of sex, which I will not cover in detail because even though I'm 33 years old and translating a pornographic BL I still blush like a little girl when I write that stuff so you'll just have to wait until I upload the chapter. lol
I will add some things about the sex scene though - D FINALLY takes off his pants (we won, fandom). We can see the bullet wound on his leg from Y as well as the wound in his chest from Hirata. D takes the lead, as usual, Y doesn't initiate any sex acts on D (I just want Y to give D a blow job once, lol). D doesn't penetrate Y in this chapter which means next chapter is going to be a continuation. ✨
At the end of the chapter, as D has Y in his mouth, Y stops D to ask "What kind of sex is this?" to which D responds 俺は節操がないのでただやりたいだけです それ以外にありません (I don't have any moral integrity/ I'm not a man of principles so I just want to have sex. It's nothing more than that.) By the way, this expression 節操がない is the same thing D said to Tsuna when he asks about D's sex life in ch 37. Y smiles softly and pulls D in for a (very steamy) kiss and says, いいな、それ (I like that / That's nice).
END OF SUMMARY
Good lord, what a great chapter. Sensei's name is included in the list for the next ihr Hertz issue so we can hopefully look forward to the next chapter on March 29. ^^
As I said above, my scanlation will be available in a few days, thank you everyone for your patience. ^^
Text: There are things we both don't know [about each other]
Kamiya: What did you do with the stolen money
Guy: I- I dont' know! I was just...
Kamiya: I know you led the operation! [T/N Kamiya kicks the guy right as he finishes his sentence]
Kamiya: I thought [the inside man] was one of the women, but to think it turned out to be one of the black suited staff--- Do you owe a debt or something?
Kamiya: Who did you pay it to!?
Kamiya: Hey, answer me, dammit!
Ooooo, so the insider at the Mama's club wasn't one of the women like Doumeki suspected in ch 50, but it was one of the black suited staff. 👀
Inami: Don’t say that
Inami: C'mon, let's have a watching [appreciation] party
Inami: Are you stupid? You know I can duplicate this data as much as I want, right?
Just a note - my translation might change when the actual chapter comes out and there's more context for this part.
In the last speech bubble I think Inami is implying that he's got a lot of copies of the video already saved in various places. The bastard.
I'm glad you're back! I missed your posts. I noticed in your last post that you said you don't expect them to say "I love you," and I expect the same thing. However, I want to ask you, if there's a confession how would it be?
Thank you for your ask and for your patience while waiting for me to get to it! This question seems to be on the mind of the fandom - I think it’s a tough one to answer.
There are a lot of ways a confession could go. I don’t particularly like making predictions because then my thoughts about characters’ actions tend to get skewed by my own predictions, but I spent some time trying to imagine what a confession might look like and to be honest, I don’t think it would be much of a confession in terms of words spoken.
At the end of vol 6 we see Doumeki have a series of realizations about Yashiro after Nana reminds him that Y was sexually active from a very young age and how that may have affected his ability to relate to and build relationships with others. D realizes on his own that Y may not be able to accept being treated kindly as a romantic or sexual partner, due to Y’s history of CSA, while he remembers the tears that Y shed during the sex scene in ch 25.
D realizes that Y may never be able to return his feelings and that by trying to love Y, D may only be hurting him. D understands that Y's appetite for rough sex with men is more like an addiction and that, ironically, in order to continue being intimate with Y without "breaking" him, he may have to treat him violently- the way other men have treated Y. But, at this time, D was unable to envision himself treating Y the way D believes Y wants to be treated. He can only imagine loving him tenderly- something he now assumes causes Y pain. This is why D chooses to stop directly pursuing Yashiro and instead imbed himself into the Yakuza culture in order to only be near him.
Here's the part I just described above. (Forgive the long transcripts, I was too lazy to edit the pages themselves)
N: Kashira is...
N: I told you, guys who are after something serious aren't his thing, remember?
N: For as long as I've known him, he's never had a "special person"
N: He basically hates people
N: I heard that he's been doing it [having sex] since he was a kid. But what if...
N: What if the kid [Yashiro] didn't want that, but it happened anyway
N: Even things that aren't like that [rape] might be twisted to seem that way
N: I think maybe, for that guy [Yashiro], doing it with men is like ---
N: --- smoking. Even if he wants to quit, he can't
>Flashback<
Y: Even though I'm always saying I don't like men
Y: [I guess I have a type] after all. That's so disappointing.
-
Y: You seem like you'd have gentle, normal sex so no thanks
-
Y: You're cute but you're scary
-
Y: I don't like [the idea of doing it with you]
-
Y (last two lines): I can't do anything about you [T/N: this could be translated like this, too: I don't know how to handle you]
N: Eh, that's just my guess, though
D: Nanahara-San...
By the way, in the drama CD there is an important line in this part that’s not in the manga. Others have pointed this out but since it's relevant here I'll mention it.
In the above page, D says "Nanahara-San" and that's the end of the dialogue in the manga but in the drama CD he then says: 「分かりました、俺は頭の前から居なくなければいいんですね」 "I understand. It's best if I stay out of Kashira's sight." This line is helpful in clearing up Doumeki's reasoning.
I believe if there’s going to be a confession it would be more of an inner confession on Y’s part where he openly and clearly admits to himself that he wants to be treated with care and tenderness. This could be sort of like the inverse of what we see in D’s realization above from the end of vol 6 (in true Yoneda-Sensei style). I think we might get some kind of inner monologue that shows Y realizing that D has been treating him only as he thinks Y wants to be treated and that in itself is a sign that D cares for him.
I think Y will do some kind of action to finally ask to be treated with love by D. I have no idea what that could possibly be - maybe D will end up in some kind of dangerous situation from which he's saved by Y (some part of D's past 4 years catching up to him, for example 👀), or maybe it could be more of a sexual request, where Y guides D to treat him tenderly. Regardless of what it is, I don't think it's going to be verbal, as much as we fans are dying for the two of them to just sit down with some coffee and have a fucking chat like normal human beings (or at least I am, lol).
I think Mama-San is going to play a big role in this realization of Y's. I don’t believe D is actually dating her and once Y understands this he’ll question why D lied to him about having a woman. I think this could be a catalyst for Yashiro to then reexamine all of his interactions with D after the time skip and come to fresh conclusions about D’s motivations, which up until now have been opaque to Yashiro.
For Doumeki's part of the confession - to be honest, I'm not sure if he needs to confess any more than he already has. We know that he loved Yashiro before the time skip (he says as much to Nana, which I talked about in this post) and I think we can assume his feelings for Y haven't changed. That would be made more obvious by the (presumed) lie about him dating the mama being revealed. So, in my opinion, the confession mostly rests on Y's shoulders.
Considering I said I don't like to make predictions at the beginning of this post, I sure made a bunch of them, lol. If you have a different idea of how their confession will play out let me know! ^^
Is yashiro mainly using inami for info at this point? He seems to always want to “just get it over with” when meeting with Inami. Also to add on about yashiro’s frustration about doumeki, it seems that yashiro might be at a crossroads where he needs to decide if he still wants to hide his feelings or actually express what he feels bc doumeki is being reckless with himself
CW: talk of trauma resulting from rape
Thank you for your ask! ^^ I love that folks are wanting to discuss Yashiro and Inami's dynamic because I think it's really pivotal to how this story will eventually wrap up.
In my opinion, Yashiro seems to be bound to Inami with the reasonable excuse that he's getting information from him. However there certainly seems to be something else going on there. I won't go into all the evidence for this in this post because there's already this great post from @eidolon-azii extensively outlining what we know about Inami so far.
We haven't been shown everything that happened between them during the time skip. Sensei has a narrative habit of showing us snippets of a story through characters' self-reflective flashbacks before showing us the whole thing, so considering we saw snippets of what took place between Inami and Yashiro during the time skip in ch 47 I think we'll get the whole story eventually. I expect it to be a fairly plot-shaking revelation as well, since it seems to be crucial to understanding Inami and Yashiro's dynamic and how Y has been living for the last 4 years.
That being said, with the information we have now, I'll speculate on why Yashiro is continuing to sleep with Inami and also what Inami and Yashiro's "relationship" might mean for Y in terms of his need to be honest about his feelings.
I mentioned above that Yashiro is using information as a reasonable excuse for sleeping with Inami. I think that's definitely true - he does gain information from the exchange so in that way it must be useful for him. However, I think there must be a deeper reason there. I think Y is recreating the trauma he experienced with his step-father every time he sleeps with Inami.
Y's thought: I'm always like this
In the panel above from ch 46 (edit: whoops, totally meant ch 47 lol) we see Inami looking very intentionally like Yashiro's step-father with Yashiro's heartbreaking statement that he's always like this - forever in this position. It implies that even if he's not literally being fucked, he's forever being fucked in his mind.
It seems to me that Yashiro has the above image, a man of authority fucking him while he's restrained, as his own self image in his mind. By returning to Inami again and again, he's fulfilling this self image. It seems to me to be a type of addiction in a way- and I'm not referring to sex addiction - I mean an addiction to "returning to the scene of the crime" so to speak. Yashiro has a little box inside his mind in which he's constantly being raped by his step-father and letting Inami fuck him opens up that box for him to look inside. He can't stop looking inside because he hasn't confronted his trauma in a way that allows him to overcome it, so he just stares into the box and lets it happen.
In the past, Yashiro had known nothing else. Maybe he was aware of the box in some way, but I don't think he ever looked directly at it. As a result, he was able to gain sexual pleasure from his sexual exploits. He begged his sexual partners to cause him pain or fuck him in more extreme ways in order to drown out and distract from what was happening in the box. I believe that masochistic indulgence was a piece of the mask that he wore before the time skip, but then he met Doumeki and was shown something he had never known before.
Y's thought: Somewhere along the way, I understood (something)
Y's thought: If I hadn't known (that thing)
Y's thought: I wouldn't have lost anything
The above panels are also from ch 47, during the scene with Inami. Others have gone into the apple imagery shown here, but I'll briefly touch on it as well.
After being shown an image of Doumeki, we see an apple, the forbidden fruit, with a bite taken out. In the second page pictured above, the apple is shown on a surface of black with a background of white. On the white background is the text 「知らなければ」 "If I hadn't known". This shows us that Yashiro thinks of his time before knowing and sleeping with Doumeki as blissful ignorance, unaware of his own desire for gentleness. On the black surface we see the text 「失くすこともなかった」 "I wouldn't have lost anything". This shows us that he feels some kind of regret for having understood his own desires.
The apple represents Yashiro's new found self-awareness, brought about by having fallen in love with Doumeki and wanting to be treated with love by him (I don't think Yashiro is aware that he loves Doumeki, but I definitely think he actually does love him). Yashiro is now fully conscious of the mask he had been wearing and so unable to gain any physical pleasure from the encounters he had previously used to distract him from the box holding his memories of being raped by his step-father. He is left only with the itch to look inside the box in a subconscious attempt to comprehend what happened to him.
The itch persists and so his encounters with Inami do too.
Now then, what does all this have to do with Doumeki and Yashiro? As anon-san mentioned above, Doumeki is being fairly reckless with himself, especially in ch 53. His character has always been a bit reckless, but I think recently this is being amplified by the emotional stress he must be feeling due to Yashiro's actions with Inami and the pressure he's feeling from Tsunakawa.
I think potentially Doumeki's reckless decision to go to Inami's place on his own may lead Yashiro to confront his feelings for Doumeki somewhat abruptly depending on how D's encounter with Inami goes. I mentioned in a previous ask that Yashiro was uncomfortable with Doumeki meeting Inami, but didn't really try to stop him.
This was perhaps because Yashiro is stuck between two possibilities:
1. If Y allows Doumeki to meet with Inami and Inami shows/tells Doumeki all the terrible shit he's being doing to Yashiro then Y knows there's a really good chance of D obliterating Inami from the face of the Earth (though this may come with damage to Doumeki in some way), which would put an end to Yashiro's self-punishment.
2. If Y stops Doumeki from meeting Inami then he would be sparing Doumeki (and himself) from the pain and shame of his own actions as well as the knowledge of Y's impotence.
If Y goes with option 1 then he must face the consequence that he will no longer have anyone to fulfill the role of authority-figure-step-father-stand-in to allow him to peer inside the box. He might even have to face the fact that he'd rather have Doumeki instead - which he's clearly not ready for. Also, Inami telling Doumeki all about Y's impotence will spare Y from having to tell D himself (something that he's attempted to do twice now, but each time has stopped himself).
If Y goes with option 2 then his status quo can be maintained. If there's one thing we have understood about Yashiro, it's that he prefers things to stay unchanged. He would rather participate in a horror show that he knows than attempt a happy ending that he doesn't understand and isn't even guaranteed.
Seeing as Yashiro did let Doumeki go to Inami's place in the end, perhaps his thinking is leaning more toward option 1.
To sum it up - I think there are a few reasons why Yashiro continues to see Inami, some of which haven't been revealed to us yet, but based on what we do know it seems to me that Yashiro is unable to stop seeing Inami due to his past trauma. Yashiro and Inami's dynamic is causing Doumeki to act recklessly - this may be the catalyst needed to make Yashiro come out and talk about his feelings for Doumeki, although I think that's still a ways down the road.
Thank you for the amazing service of posting this full translation. If you have time and interest, I would like to engage with you in a deeper discussion about cultural nuances in Saezuru. I am very curious about how the Japanese fans interpret and speculate. On a related note, what other BL series do you follow? I particularly like Blue Sky Complex, though it is in a different register from Saezuru.
Thank you again from saving the fandom from baseless speculation with your service!
Thank YOU for enjoying the chapter and reaching out. ^^
I apologize in advance, as this post got a little long, lol
Your question about cultural nuances within Saezuru is something I've been considering for a while. My native language is English but living in Japan for the past 5 years has allowed me to reach a fairly proficient level of Japanese. With the understanding of another language comes a lot of eye-opening realizations about culture and how it affects the lens through which we view our own world.
I mentioned in another post that I've been reading Saezuru (and other manga) off and on for a long time, but I had sort of moved away from reading manga for a while until fairly recently. When I came back to reading I decided to read everything in Japanese and it turns out that there's a lot of information in Japanese that just can't be communicated completely in English.
The most prominent example I can think of is the drastic difference in the way Doumeki and Yashiro speak to each other. In Japanese there are very clear politeness registers that people use when they speak. Doumeki is very polite almost all the time to Yashiro (and most of the other characters, by the way) but Yashiro talks like a ... sassy thug-child? (lol) I don't know how to describe it in English- he has a very casual way of talking most of the time that's characteristic of a "rough guy" and hard to express in English. Nanahara also speaks in a very rough way to Doumeki but not to Yashiro, to whom he speaks fairly politely.
This is all to say that in Saezuru, or really any other Japanese narrative, the power or position of the person a character is speaking to relative to that character's own position is really evident based on the language they use. The interplay between those positions and how characters use language to impose their own perceived or real power is a little lost in translation because in English we simply don't differentiate our politeness registers so deliberately.
This use of different registers makes Doumeki's out of character rudeness in the above scene from ch 53 all the more spicy in Japanese because it's very obvious and almost jarring. He uses polite language with Yashiro even during wild, emotional sex. Doumeki's change in politeness register really shows how much he views Inami as scum.
In my opinion, Saezuru is a story in part about power imbalances and hierarchy, be that within interpersonal relationships or organizational relationships. This ability to clearly feel the interplay of characters' positions through their language is a nuance Japanese speaking fans get to enjoy that English speaking fans probably miss out on.
Of course there are also plays on words that just don't translate, like the "tsukkomi" joke from ch 53 and other culturally relevant jokes that are difficult for non-Japanese speaking folks to understand.
You also asked about Japanese fans' interpretations of and speculations on Saezuru so I thought I'd include this blog (beware, it's all in Japanese - try to read it if you're aspiring to learn or give your browser translator a challenge) from a Japanese fan called TokyoUsagi. I sometimes read their impressions of Saezuru and I think they're pretty in-line with a lot of Japanese fan interpretations. In this post they talk about the intriguing idea of what Doumeki will do when he watches the video Inami has of Yashiro and realizes Y is impotent 👀 But I'll make another post about that since this is already a novel (lol).
Finally you asked what other BLs I follow - actually none at the moment T.T I don't have a whole lot of free time so I devote what time I do have to a few series, of which only Saezuru is BL. I have read Blue Sky Complex in the past and I enjoyed it but I think that was when there were only 2 or 3 volumes. It looks like the story has progressed a lot! I'll have to check it out. ^^
One BL that I enjoyed in the past does come to mind though, that's Shout Out Loud! (Sakende Yaruze!) by Satosumi Takaguchi. Oh, I also liked Dark Heaven by JUNS but I haven't kept up with it. I prefer stories with a bit more narrative meat on them than most BL stories offer so while I've read a billion BLs not too many come to mind when I think about ones I've loved.
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