she thinks about dying

ONE DAY I'LL SHOW SOMEONE ALL OF THIS AND (S)HE WILL BE OKAY WITH IT

[timotaychalamet]

Carol (2015) dir. Todd Haynes

[bled]

[turnaroundplease]

“Things lovers will teach you:

As long as you exist, you're never going to remain same the person you are. Your eyes will change. Your smile, your thoughts, your dreams will change. All to accommodate the coming & going of a whole other person. If that is not what unconditional means, perhaps it means nothing.

Being wild is alright. But there's a special kind of patience in being gentle, that you only realise on the nights when you can't fall asleep together. You'll suddenly learn the art of mothering him, & you'll find it is a fire that burns brighter than lust.

However long it gets, you'll survive the days apart. Until you're united again. Then the collapsing will begin. You'll realise that the emptiness from the separation remains. Not even forgiveness fills the void. Until you stop using your words & let your eyes take over the violence. The eyes always know the battle song that'll set you free.”

[turnaroundplease]

[turnaroundplease]

May good things come my way.

[turnaroundplease]

All of a sudden, I can’t breathe, and this debilitating feeling of loss and being lost is all too familiar.

[turnaroundplease]

[turnaroundplease]

“I don’t want to have anything to do with you anymore.”

I can’t stop crying.

[turnaroundplease]

Nothing more I need than a warm hug, and to curl up into you.

[peninthewild-deactivated2025122]

[turnaroundplease]

Everything is transactional. There’s nothing I can offer you anymore, and this is when you leave.

[turnaroundplease]

When you give until there’s nothing left and you become this stranger, this person you don’t recognise. And nobody sticks around because you have nothing left to give.

[turnaroundplease]

Be soft. Do not let the world make you hard. Do not let the pain make you hate. Do not let the bitterness steal your sweetness. Take pride that even though the rest of the world may disagree, you still believe it to be a beautiful place.

[weirhd]

[turnaroundplease]

When will the pain stop? Once I let it?

[turnaroundplease]

Can’t stop crying. I’m so fucking stupid. I fucking hate this.

[turnaroundplease]

Running out of ways to calm my anxiety