RMH

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Jules of Nature

Kaledo Art
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Peter Solarz
Claire Keane

@theartofmadeline
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
NASA

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Cosimo Galluzzi

Janaina Medeiros

oozey mess
will byers stan first human second

roma★
d e v o n

tannertan36
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸

titsay

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@uhhyeahbro
Straight Stoner Bro
Mike has no idea his buddies are giving him pussy kush, a strain that turns you into an arrogant, douchey straight bro who's obsessed with pussy. Mike's already feeling the urge to flex and gloat about how "swole" he is, so it won't be long before he's starving for pussy. Pussy kush is also highly addictive. Mike's gay days are over, and that fact has his buddies beaming from ear to ear. Mike's going to be one of them now, a straight stoner bro for life!
yo like uhhh listen up all u pathetic lil brainlet nerdz sittin in ur mommy basment scrollin tumblr like sum sad virgin loser thinkin ur sooo smort n deep n shit LMAOOOOO this aint for u weak ass keyboard warriors but i KNOW u gonna read every single word n ur tiny peanut brain gonna be hurtin so bad tryna keep up uhhh like u probly soundin out the words slow as fuuuck n still missin half em HAHAHA get rekt
bein a DUMB JOCK aint no fuckin KINK broooo its a whole ass LIFESTYLE u get me or do i gotta spell it out for ur slow ass?? uhhh u cant just throw on sum tight compression shorts for like ten minutes while u beat ur lil meat to jock porn n then go bak to bein a scrawny overthinkin nerd. NAH MAN this shit 24/7 365 no days off no brakes BRO. i wake up pumped AF smashin the gym every mornin my bros high fivin me n flexin in the mirror watchin my pecs bounce like YOOO these gains hittin different
u probly sittin there right now like “b-but i roleplay as a dumb jock n its so hawt” SHUT THE FUUUCK UP U POSER u aint foolin NOBODY u just a lil calculator boy who cant even add 2 plus 2 without ur phone helpin u like a baby lmaooo. real dumb jocks like ME we LIVE this shit we dont pretend. i skipped class AGAIN today uhhh who needs dat dumb book learnin when coach waitin for me to deadlift twice my bodyweight n the cheer hoes watchin my fat ass in these tiny shorts?? my GPA like a 1.2 but my bench 315 n my abs look like a washbord uhh u even know wut a washbord is or u googlin it like the retard u are??
like dont get it twisted i AINT mad about bein DUMB its the BEST part BROOO. my brain got zero room for all dat thinkin n worryin n future bullshit uhhh i just smash sets chug protein shakes n high five my bros after we CRUSH the other team. u ever tried not thinkin for a whole day?? nah u couldnt last 5 minutes ur lil anxiety would explode cuz u too busy cryin about bills n college n all dat gay shit. me?? i just worry if my shake got enuf peanut butter n if my bros wanna hit the bars later like REAL problems u know??
n yeah we party HARD every weekend straight up black out off cheap beer wake up in sum random chick bed with my bros laughin at how fucked up i was but guess wut?? i dont give ONE single fuck cuz tomorow just another day to LIFT n look better than all u scrawny internet trolls put together uhhh like u even touched a barbell or u still scared the big guys gonna laugh at ur twig arms?? newsflash they ARE laughin at how pathetic u look tryin to act like one of us u lil tryhard
so next time u see some hot jock walkin by flexin n grinnin like a idiot u better bow down n admit ur just a weak lil smart boy who wishes he could be this retarded n free. uhhh like stop pretendin u smart n deep n shit just embrace it bro turn ur brain off n join the gains train or keep bein a sad ass loser forever LMAO get on my level or stay mad uhhh
like reblog if u a real dumb bro or if ur just a jealous nerd tryna cope HAHAHA turn brain off broooo uhhh smash like button dummies
The Game Show
You can think of a few reasons why you found yourself in the audience that night. Well, really one. When you heard "Are You Smarter Than A Himbo" was putting on a show in your neighborhood, you couldn't resist. Sure, it was kind of stupid. You'd seen the clips online. They'd bring some braindead jock up on stage to flex, laugh, crack jokes, and answer basic trivia wrong. The poor idiot would laugh along as the audience laughed at him. You'd always figured the dunce was too dumb to realize they were laughing at him. But fuck, those guys were hot. So if anything, you'd get to ogle at some hot guy flexing all night and maybe get a few laughs out of it too.
"Do you think Zak's pecs are real?"
"Jason is like totally the hottest."
"I think Ryan isn't as dumb as he lets on."
"Did you know Mike is single? I can't…"
You roll your eyes at the fanfare all around you. These people were seriously into it. And then it starts.
"Welcome everyone!" You watch as a lanky man struts on stage with his hair slicked back and a wide grin on his face, "Are you ready!?" The crowd- mostly women and a few guys cheered in response, "I said: are you ready!?" You roll your eyes as the host worked the crowd, "Alright, alright… welcome." The host smiles wider, "Put your hands together for our main man!"
The host gestures toward the side of the stage and Zak strolls out with a slow, confident walk, his arms flexed as if expecting applause. He’s got thick curls falling over his forehead, and his chest is packed with muscle, tight under his white tank top. The crowd goes wild as he steps onto the platform.
“Y’all ready?” Zak shouts, raising both arms above his head. “Let’s go!” He pulls off his shirt in one smooth motion, and your eyes widen as you take in his massive pecs and perfect abs. The crowd similarly goes wild. Zak grins, flashing a perfect set of teeth, "I'm so fuckin' pumped to be here tonight! I fuckin' love you guys!"
"But Zak, I think you have something to say to everyone. Right?" The host interjects, patting the massive jock on the back.
"Yo dude yeah, for real." Zak nods, "Like, this is gonna be my last show, ya know? With the whole modeling thing blowin' up and all." The audience groans, "I know, it sucks majorly, trust me!" Zak frowns, "But like, you'll get to see plenty more of me. Trust me brahs." He winks and the crowd cheers.
The host claps, "That’s what I like to hear! Alright, let’s get started!"
You lean forward in your seat as the first audience member is brought up. It only takes a few questions for her to utterly humiliate Zak, who just laughs and flexes like the dumb himbo that he is. As the contestant returns to her seat, the host's eyes scan the crowd, zeroing in on you.
"What about you there in the blue shirt? He looks smart, right Zak? Let's get you up here!"
Initially you're shocked. You? The host gestures for you to make your way up to the stage. You can feel your heart pounding as you climb the stairs, palms feeling a little sweaty. The bright lights, all eyes on you. And as you step onto the stage, you get an up close look of Zak. His biceps bulge impressively, glistening with a light sheen of sweat. But god he smells like a wet gym sock.
"Sup bro, nice to meetcha!" Zak grins and throws a muscular arm around you, "Dude, you ready for this?"
"Aw do I sense a budding bromance?" The host grins and the crowd cheers. After settling them down, he turns to you. "You know how this works by now. Do you think you're smarter than a himbo?"
"Yeah, I think I am." You reply.
"Heh we'll see about that, bro!" Zak guffaws, "I was just goin' easy on that last chick."
"The confidence!" The host laughs, "Let's put it to the test. Your first question: Which is the only sea without any coastlines?"
You ponder for a moment. A sea without a coastline? That's... god what was that? You feel your cheeks flushing red, as you realize you don't know the answer to that. But if you don't know the answer, Zak would definitely not know either. Speaking of Zak, he's bouncing his pecs like the oversized gym bro he is.
"Is it the Caspian Sea?" You shrug, eyes still locked on his massive pecs. Of course the host shakes his head with exaggerated sadness.
"Ah, seems Mr. Smartypants here was a bit too distracted admiring the view to ace that question!" He winks at the audience, while Zak flexes.
"No shame in that, brah!"
You feel your face flush red with embarrassment as the laughter from the audience washes over you. Great, now they all think you're just another hormone-addled fool who can't string two thoughts together because of a pretty face.
"Alright Zak, a question for you now buddy!" You figure Zak is about to bomb this question anyway- round will end in a tie and you can walk away with some dignity, "What color are bananas?"
Zak scratches his head, "Dude… tricky." He chuckles, low and dumb, "So, I want to say yellow, but also green when they're not ripe. Oh but brown too if they go for too long!"
"Fantastic answer Zak! Well thought out!" The host grins as the crowd cheers, "Uh oh, looks like Zak has pulled ahead!"
The fuck kind of question was that? You look at the host and then Zak, who is doing a victory dance. The color of bananas? Of course Zak would know that- he's a fucking ape. You smirk at your own joke.
"Okay okay, let's try another one! Mr. Smartypants, are you ready to redeem yourself?" You're ready, more than ready. You're not..., "What pigments are responsible for the red color of leaves?"
Your mouth opens, but no words come out. You don't have an answer for that. Maybe you did know it, but between the flexing stud and the stage fright, you couldn't find the information.
"Chlorophyll."
"What a shame! That is not correct." He smiles at the audience, "It seems Zak may have a chance to widen his lead! Hey big guy, what day of the month is Christmas celebrated on?" It takes Zak maybe a minute or two to answer that one correctly, "Look at that folks, Zak is now up by two!" He turns to you with a grin, "Seems our guest is not much of a smartypants after all!"
Again, your face flush reds, "No worries, little dude." Zak ruffles your hair, "I uh, I got some smarts, ya know." He looks out towards the audience, "Last show brahs but first win!"
The crowd cheers and it dawns on you that you might be the first person to actually lose this stupid game. Frustration bubbles up inside you as the host and crowd continue to mock you. You're better than this, smarter than being made a fool of. Screw it, you're going to show them all up.
"I could answer every single one of those easy-ass questions he's getting," you mutter under your breath, but the mic picks it up anyway. The host's eyes light up.
"Oh ho, is that so?" He raises an eyebrow, a smirk gracing his features. "Well then, why don't you prove it, hot shot? Let's see if you can handle something a little more…your speed. Here we go bud - how does the body cool down during intense exercise like a heavy workout session?"
You chuckle. Really? This was the question? You clear your voice, "Sweating. That's how it keeps from overheating."
"Correct!"
"Woah bro, nice one!"
Yeah... that was a nice one. Finally got a question right... finally... You wince as a warmth fills your upper arms. At first it's just a gentle tingling, a warm buzzing beneath your skin. But quickly it builds to a throbbing, insistent pressure.
"What the…?"
The sensation intensifies, an intensifying heat pulsing through your upper arms. Your skin prickles and tightens as your biceps and triceps stretch against the sleeve of your shirt. It feels like the most intense pump after a grueling workout, but magnified tenfold. Your arms throbbing, aching. You feel aware of just how much more space they're taking up. And the twitching- it's incessant. Unconsciously, your arms start to rise, muscles tensing, flexing…
"Whoa…" you mutter, marveling at the sheer size and density of your upper arms, "How…?"
The host clears his throat pointedly, breaking you out of your awestruck reverie. "Ahem, moving on! Thanks for that… demonstration." He shoots you a knowing wink, a sly grin playing at the corners of his mouth. "Let's see if we can't challenge that big ol' brain of yours with another question, shall we? What does the acronym SBD stand for in powerlifting?"
"Oh brah, way too easy." Zak chides, crossing his massive arms over his muscular chest, "Even I know that one."
But your head is swimming. The powerful feeling in your arms send pleasurable waves of warmth through your body. But your mind. You're reviewing the question. Thinking it through. SBD? In powerlifting?
"SBD... SBD..." You rub your chin, unconsciously flexing your now massive bicep, "Huh... like... That's uh..."
You look over at Zak and he's making some kind of motion. A goofy grin on his face as he squats. Squats. Squats!
"Bro!" You grin, "Squats, dude! Yeah, that's what the S stands for." You grin, but the host shakes his head, "C'mon what?" You pout.
"You're still forgetting the rest." The host smiles, "And the timer is counting down."
You shuffle anxiously on your feet. You know this, right? But why would you? You're not into powerlifting. But like, it should be easy. If S stands for squats then like, wouldn't B and D also be something to do with working out? Yeah? Totally, that makes sense. But like, what else is there? What other... huh... shirt is getting kinda tight too. And fuck, you can't help but notice how warm your chest feels. Nice and warm, pressing more and more against the fabric of your shirt. Stretching it out against your big, meaty...
"Bench press, brah! B stands for bench press!" You say with a grin as your shirt starts to tear away, revealing a set of massive pecs and a chiseled torso, "Huh where'd my shirt go?" The audience cheers and you grin, staring down as you bounce your pecs.
"Excellent job, but unfortunately, you didn't finish. You missed D, you big dunce."
The host laughs, and you laugh along with him and the audience. Big dunce. Yeah that's... that's you? You pause for a second and start to feel that same embarrassment from earlier. They're laughing... not with you, but...
"Dude, can't win em all!" Zak slaps you on your increasingly wider back and you turn to him- now at eye-level, "But like, brah, you've got this next one!"
"Y-y-you th-think so.... brah?" Your tongue feels heavy, the words feel sluggish. You notice your voice sounds deeper to your ears, "I..."
"You have to focus there, smartypants!" The host interrupts, "Two more questions. Are you ready?" You nod slowly, "In a deadlift, how high are you supposed to lift the barbell before lowering it?"
"Deadlift..." Your eyes light up suddenly, "Wait, bro! The D! That's what D stands for, brah!" You say excitedly.
The whole audience laughs, as does the host. You look at him, feeling a strange sense of confusion bubbling up. Why were they laughing? What was so funny?
"Good job there, but that was the last question. We've moved on, big guy."
"Oh..." You chuckle, a grin forming on your lips as you let out a deep, dumb laugh, "Huhuhuh that was pretty stupid of me." The audience and the host laugh even louder, and you find yourself joining in, "Alright, gotta lock in, gotta... brah what was the question?"
"Dead lifts..."
"Oh fuck yeah! I fuckin' love deadlifts."
The host grins, "Yes, exactly! So tell us, when doing a deadlift, how high do you lift the barbell before lowering it?"
"Yeah... uh..." You bite your lip, thinking hard. Your fingers drum against your swollen bicep as you try to concentrate and with a sigh, lift your hands behind your head, "Oh nice..."
Your eyes lock on to your bulging bis and tris and you're momentarily distracted. But the sharp tang of your own musk drifts up from your armpits, momentarily derailing your train of thought. Fuck, you smell good. Really fucking good. But since when did you...?
"Brah, c'mon you got this." Zak says, watching you closely.
You shake your head and run a hand through your perfectly gelled, styled hair, before pausing- fuck your aesthetic is probably cooked. You awkwardly pat at your hair.
"Worry about your hair later, you've got a question to answer." The host says.
"Fuck, sorry..." You let out an awkward chuckle, "Just gotta..."
Your body moves instinctively into the proper deadlift position—back straight, knees slightly bent, hips pushed back—as if you've done this 1000s of times before. As you demonstrate the form flawlessly, a new awareness floods your lower body. Your glutes feel… alive. Heavy. Round. Perfect. You grin as you squeeze them unconsciously, feeling the dense muscle fibers contract.
"The answer is hips, bro."
"Let's fuckin' go, brah!" Zak cheers and slaps you on the ass, sending a wave of intense pleasure reverberating through your meaty glutes.
As the crowd cheers, your eyes lock on Zak. The pleasure from him slapping your ass still making you shudder. You drink him in, fixated on the prominent bulge straining against his gym shorts.
"Fuck..." You mumble- he's packing serious heat there.
Your mouth waters involuntarily as fantasies flood your mind—Zak pinning you down, those huge hands squeezing your meaty ass while he drives his massive cock deep inside you. The image of you riding his thick cock sends shivers down your growing frame, and you imagine running your tongue over every inch of his sweat-slick skin. You lick your lips and grin at the thought.
When your eyes meet again, Zak doesn't look away. Instead, his smirk widens as he catches you staring, and the few brain cells he has recognize exactly what you’re thinking. He flexes for the audience, but he turns to give you a quick wink, letting you know all that flexing was just for you... because he wants you to know he wants you too. After all, you know there's not way he could resist you either. With your... bulging pecs? Massive arms? Thick glutes?
"Wait..." You mumble. You can feel the rusting gears in your increasingly empty head turn ever so slightly, drool dripping from the corner of your mouth.
Your head was spinning, brain trying to make sense of all of it.
Something’s off, right? Like... this ain’t how it used to be. You know that. You weren’t… this. But then... what were you then, dude? Cause, like, look at you. Seriously... just look. You’re absolutely shredded. I mean, c’mon, those arms? That chest? You don’t just wake up lookin’ this jacked without bein’… well, this guy. So how could you not be you if you straight-up look like you? Right?
A dumb chuckle escapes your lips as all that thinking overwhelms and shuts down whatever last remaining brain cells you have.
The host snaps his fingers in front of your face, breaking you out of your haze. "Earth to bro, we still got one question."
"Huh? Wha-" You blink slowly, your expression vacant and slack. Drool slips down your chin as you stare blankly ahead.
"Are you smarter than a himbo?" The host grins.
"Nawww, bro, 'course not!" You reply with a big, dumb grin spreading across your face, "Can't be smarter than a himbo cuz… I AM the fuckin' himbo, bro!"
The host laughs, shaking his head, "Well folks, I guess that settles it! Looks like we've got ourselves a new resident himbo to take Zak's place. Give it up for… COLT!"
The audience erupts into cheers and applause as you beam proudly, basking in the spotlight. You feel Zak sling a muscular arm around your broad shoulders, squeezing you close.
"Dude, so fuckin' glad you're joinin' the fam, bro!" Zak enthuses, his hand drifting lower to grope your ass possessively, "Trust me bro, you're gonna love it."
Zak's strong grip on your juicy ass makes you shudder and you can tell by that grin that he's thinking exactly what you're thinking.
The host clears his throat loudly, snapping you out of your lustful stupor. "Don't forget to wave to the crowd, champ!" He gestures encouragingly towards the audience.
With a dopey grin, you raise a hand in greeting, relishing the adoration pouring in from all sides.
"Thanks y'all, this is gonna be fuckin' sick!" You call out enthusiastically, grinning like an idiot.
And as Zak digs his fingers into your massive ass, you lick your lips hungrily. The only thought in your empty head was that once this show was over, you'd be giving him a private encore performance that neither of you would forget…
The sun also rises... 😉 Bask in the rays of the Rainbow Band fraternity!
Yup
Hey how did you get so dumb?
yo anon lmao thx 4 the ask bro u got me all blushin n grinnin like a total meathead rn 😂💪
ok so real talk i wuznt always this big empty headed dumb jock ok?? i was smart jock in HS. readin long articles, takin hard classes, scrollin news apps n tryin 2 sound all deep n clever in group chats. it wuz stressin me tf out n makin me miserable af fr
then i found these hypno audios (u kno the dumb jock hypno files on that one site, the ones that loop all night in ur earbuds while u sleep). started listenin every single night just 4 kicks at first but after like 6 weeks my brain started gettin all fuzzy n slow. words got harder, i stopped carin abt anythin that aint gym or food or bros. hypno just rewired my dumb head slow n steady bro
lifestyle changes came next n they hit hard. i dropped all my tough classes n switched 2 super easy online ones i could pass without thinkin. gym became my EVERYTHIN liftin 6 days a week no excuses, eatin nothin but high protein… chicken rice protein shakes n sleepin 10+ hours. stopped hangin with my old “smart” friends cuz they made my head hurt with all their talk. now its just me n my dumb bro crew watchin gym tiktoks, playin call of duty n grunting at each other lmao
but the behavior modification stuff wuz what really locked it in fr. i set up rules so my brain would stop doin smart shit on its own:
• cut out ALL smart apps n stuff cold turkey. deleted news apps, reddit (except the gym n meme ones), any readin apps, even deleted my old kindle. phone is now just gym tracker, porn, games n insta gym pics. if i even open somethin with long words i make myself close it n do some flexin till i forget what i wuz doin
• whenever a smart thought creeps in (like tryin 2 read a long post or thinkin abt career or politics or whatever) i catch it n immediately switch. i either flex in the mirror real hard till my arms burn n my head goes blank, or i start thinkin bout my next lift instead, or i just repeat the hypno trigger “big dumb bro” out loud till the smart crap fades. no more overthinkin just simple pump thoughts or “how big can i get”
• i reward myself when i stay dumb all day. extra cheat meal, new tank top, or just layin in bed starin at the ceiling feelin all empty n happy. if i slip n think too much i punish with an hour of edgin without cummin while listenin to more hypno lmao
after a couple months it all clicked dude. now i literally start thinkin less abt smart shit on my own. like my brain just auto-switches. ill see a long caption n im like “nah too many words” n go right back 2 scrollin shirtless gym pics or flexin my bis in the mirror. deep talks make me zone out n i just nod n say “yeah bro sick” n change the subject 2 how much i benched. head feels so light n good now, no stress, just pump eat sleep repeat 🧠➡️🫥
best decision i ever made hands down. if u want the exact hypno links or my full routine just hmu anon i’ll send em no prob. stay big n dumb out there bros it’s the fuckin best life fr 💪🫡
Kiss him like you mean it.
bro yr such a fukkin fag
jockstrap friday.
Do it with a friend
Dumbass doesn’t know that joint was full of the Nu strain of weed. Take a few hits and that fuzzy, foggy feeling never goes away. That stoned, out-of-it look on your face becomes permanent. That groggy feeling you get when you try to remember a … uh… word, and it’s uhhh… right on the tip of your … uh, uh, tongue… yeah, that’s gonna happen a lot more now, bro. Flip side is that you’ll be working out all the time and focusing on getting fit, so you won’t need to talk too much. That’s right, laugh your dumbfuck laugh. Huhuhuhuh. Huhuhuhuh. Now take another hit. You’re doing so well.
ughhhhhh fuuuuuck bros... my head is so fuckin empty again 😵💫💦 i think i cummed my brains out for real this time... like i was jerkin it so hard last night watchin my own pump videos n i just kept goin n goin n every time i blew a huge load it felt like more of my smart stuff shot right outta my dick... now im even dumber than yesterday haha
i used to be kinda smart i think?? like maybe went to school n shit but now every time i nut my brain gets smaller n smaller. my big swollen muscles are takin over everything. i cant even remember what i ate for breakfast but i remember exactly how many times i edged my thick cock before i exploded everywhere.
look at me flexin these huge guns tho!! 💪😩 i was tryin to think of sumthin to say for this pic but nahhh... brain all drained out. just cum n protein shakes up there now. i swear my skull is hollow except for the echo of me moanin like a stupid whore while i pumped load after load. every orgasm melts another braincell n im down to like... three left tops. one for liftin, one for eatin, n one for flexin in the mirror like the brainless muscle slut i am.
i keep strokin it thinkin it'll help me get smarter but it just makes me dumber n hornier. my balls are always full n my head is always empty... perfect trade if u ask me. i try to read a text n my eyes cross n all i can think about is bustin another fat nut till my brains leak out my dick again.
so yeah this is me... big dumb cum-drained jock who just blew his iq into a sock for the 50th time this week. cant even spell "intelligence" anymore but who needs that when u got these boulder shoulders n a fat pump??
if ur readin this n ur smart... come drain the rest of my brains out for me bro. ill just sit here flexin n moanin while u empty whats left of my head.
dumb n drained is the only way to be 💦🧠🚫
Himbo Makeover
[M4M] [Himbo] [IQ Reduction]
Himbo Makeover by Jockout on Patreon. Join Jockout's community for exclusive content and updates.
Babe, you're like… toootally in need of a little touch-up, I think. Some glam, a little you time… and I know just the place! 💖
"…Well, why don’t we get started? Oh! My bad. An introduction; my name’s Jockout, and it’s lovely to meet you. I’ll be your restylist for the day… I’m very professionally trained in, uh, all this stuff we’re going to be doing. Sure, I’m a stylist. But I really specialize in… bringing people to where they wanna be. 🩷 So whenever you’re ready… you can take a seat there, infront of the mirror. In that big, comfortable pink chair… the same one you probably saw on whatever ad it was that brought you in here. And even if it’s not… let’s just pretend it was. 🫰 Right? Let’s just pretend this plush, pink, perfectly placed seat is exactly the one you saw on our advertising… that made you want to come here in the first place."
It's like, Just Ken 2!
Just Ken, Again?
…Something like that.
This file guides you through a combo spa day/makeover, where the treatments you experience will help you progress towards your FULL himbo potential. And unlike a regular makeover… transient, fleeting… this glow-up will last forever, doll.
💫This File Contains:
Standard himbo programming; for me, at this point, that means dumbing via simplification and focusing on gym/sex… making you a smidge more vain, a little bit of a preening peacock… and implied sluttification.
Suggestions to "train" in relaxation by choosing to consciously relax and let go of your thoughts, many times throughout the day. This is linked to the idea of being laid-back -> being unthinking -> being dumb.
Suggestions to return and relisten.
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https://linktr.ee/jockout
https://discord.gg/uWU6A5xFPY
When I'm not dropping myself or others, I'm off being a dogbro in the wilderness of Ireland. But I am always available for commissions if you reach out via DM. My rate is currently €7-10 per minute of completed audio, but you can contact me via DM OR join my Discord for updated info. Keep listening, bros.
Insomnia Cure
Blaine Gibson
The old you is finally awake again. It must’ve been twenty months since this self had control of your own body and mind. It felt like a never-ending bad dream as you watched yourself obey your jock roommate’s every hypnotic suggestion. You pledged a frat with him and surrounded yourself with only your—actually his frat bros, pumped iron with him every day, wore only his gymbro wardrobe, and talked like a chill bro neanderthal while the thoughts in your head felt like molasses trying to drip through cotton candy. He even made you only take classes that you could fully bullshit with the magic brain box... No, um... A large language model.
“What’s wrong, bro?” your bro captor Colton says, noticing a change in your demeanor.
“All this is wrong, bro!” Wait, why can’t you stop saying that word? You try again:
“Colton, you’re not my bro. You’re a sick bastard trying to make me into some dumb ass clone of your frat bros for brojobs and muscle worship seshes! But none of that’s me!”
“Calm down, bro,” he says. You suddenly slump a bit and lower the arm that was pointing a finger at him.
“Here, wear your chain, bro.” You feel Colton place the thick gold chain you’ve been wearing 24/7 around your neck—though you took it off this morning. And you suddenly feel a cozy warmth wash over you.
“If none of this is you, and I’m not your bro, then who are you? What is your name? If you can tell me your name, I’ll let you go back to normal and never bother you again.”
“That’s not fair! You put the dumb jock chain on me, bro! The hypnotic trigger… I… I… can’t remember shit!”
In horror, you grasp your head tightly through your BPO ball cap, as if to keep your memories from draining away and this vestige of your old self from being suppressed once again.
“Bro, my head hurts,” you eventually say to your bro Colton.
“Just try not to think too hard, Tank.”