This blog makes no sense

never let your fear decide your fate

[thechanelmuse]

[baskings-blog]

when you’re cozy in bed and you hear heavy rain reblog if you agree

[hwardlaunch]

Fun family story: when my aunt was marrying her wife everyone was really excited but also dreading it because my aunt is known for her insanely long speeches so everyone knew her vows would be like 9 hours long so when it came time for her to say her vows she had a shit ton of cue cards in her hands and even her wife started groaning and my aunt took a deep inhale and then unravelled all the cue cards which were taped together and they all just read ‘HOT DAMN’ in giant letters and those were my aunts vows.

[dangerous-john]

@shoelesscosmonaut

[pr1nceshawn]

The Best ATM Withdrawal Defense

[alexanders-archives]

I’m here for women with powerful dogs!

[urocyonfox-deactivated20210104]

My land lady is a 90lb 88 year old woman with 5 full grown Rottweiler boys. They sit around her when she gardens and watch her like the secret service. If you show up to pay rent they all stand up and stand between you and her.

It’s intimidating to have 5 pony size boys all staring at you until she stands up realizes it’a you and walks to you.

My favorite part is she wades through them like swamp water saying in her cute old voice ‘move’ ‘move please’ and each one she nudges to move wags his whole body at her touch and stumbles out of the way like he’s been knocked over by a truck. It gives me life paying my rent.

[tragikempyre-deactivated2013040]

[tastefullyoffensive]

“This is why my cell phone broke.” (via LuckyStar111222)

[transparalyze]

[bob-belcher]

[bluwiikoon-archive]

Sandshrew did such a good job!!

[endofeva1997]

Smash mouth has a song about a guy realizing the girl he’s dating is still in love with her ex girlfriend and he encourages said ex to come back and rekindle their lesbian romance

[endofeva1997]

[thefingerfuckingfemalefury]

Maybe the real All Star was the bisexuals we met along the way

[tanviberwah]

women: happy international women’s day!

men:

[glassbonespaperskin]

[commongayboy-deactivated2018082]

[theybby-deactivated20231001]

I’m screaming??? So my cat knows I get upset when he steps on my paintings (not yelling or anything I think he just sees me spend hours trying to cover up what his paws do) in my “studio” which is a crammed small storage closet with painting all over the floor drying , so like I’m in there rn and I saw him try to get to point A to point b but it was impossible for him to jump over so like he realized the matte parts were dry and like he was stepping on the corners of the painting and every step he’d look at his paw to see if he fucked up and honestly it was the most thoughtful thing ever I don’t ever wanna hear anyone ever say that cats don’t care

[gaymerlvl-pharmercy]

I beg you, if this ever happens again, get a video

[tastefullyoffensive]

Animal Puddles (more)

[thempress]

People look down on McDonald’s employees but fail to realize that if all these folks left McDonald’s and pursued “better careers”  your ass wouldn’t be able to get a McDouble with an Oreo McFlurry at 3am. 

You can’t demand a service while simultaneously degrading those who provide it for you. 

[bexlogic]

You can’t demand a service while simultaneously degrading those who provide it for you. 

[certasluas]