hello! iโve been talkin bout this a bit already but iโm going to turn undermattsun into a multifandom blog! which means my non-hq sideblogs, namely underyuuta will be used more as an archive. iโll still be using underkita, which will probs also become multifandom (but for all the non dark content purposes)!ย
anyway, pls be patient w me as i work on makin m.lists and figuring out otherย organization stuffs.
that being said, the fandoms iโll be mainlyย writing for will be: haikyuu (surprise surprise), jujutsu kaisen, attack on titan + maybeย obey me
once i get my rules together iโll outline other fandoms iโm down to talk about + update if i change my mind about which ones iโll be writing for!!
this blog will also become multifandom (but of course NO dark content)!!! the same rules will apply + the same fandoms will be written. i'll fix the m.lists here too, it'll take a hot minute tho </3
yoo so i read the manga (sweet lies and feumielle i forgot what itโs called) bc of u answering one ask and it was SO GOOD. do u have any more nsfw manga recs bcs iโll eat them up
PLS PRETEND IM NOT SEVERAL MONTHS LATE TO ANSWERING THIS!! but iโve been reading a fair amount of these and iโve been trying to keep track! so hereโs a few that have a good mix of romance + the hot stuff (i hope that tickles ur fancy!)
note: these may have some dubcon elements to it, like sweet lies (female lead might say โnoโ and other variants when male lead makes advances! be warned!!)
kimi omae ni shitara ore wa mou tsu... - one of those good ol reuniting w a former classmate and someone gets hot kinda thing but itโs rlly sweet and the male lead is So Hot and BIG > [ongoing]
crazy over his fingers - this one has been animated but please read it instead the art is just YUM and the sex isโฆmmmm, this is more on the vein of childhood friends reuniting which i always love! > [ongoing]
a dream between the sheets - GOD this is a collection of short stories but each one both mended and broke my heart in so many ways > [ongoing]
no need to undress to have sex - this is a p long one that i kindaโฆgave up on but the story is kinda cute, the sex is good and the male leads kinda sweet, but basically the female lead has a scar sheโs insecure about and he helps her deal with it > [ongoing]
mangaka to yakuza - if u know me then u know i love, LOVE, anything yakuza/mob/mafia/etc so this just itched that just right > [ongoing]
i wanted to tell you, i was a pure innocent soul until i read your works and now i walk by the skate park and go "damn, i would want a skate rat to fuck me", and I weigh the pros and cons of how toxic it would be and i'm like "the sex is probably worth it tho" - thank you for the enlightenment. Ethics and morals be damned, them skate rat fics and haikyuu guys be too tempting
ksjdfhkjh u know what??? for da 2d skate rats they get a pass <33 irl ones do not have the pass
thinking many thoughts about sr kunimi,,,, i just finished Mouth (again bc i am a Whore) and for some reason all i can think about is soft (but toxic nimi) like yeah he fucks around with other girls on the regular,,,, but like remember that time yโall went on a late night drive and he got you gas station snacks??? like remember when yโall had that smoke sesh and he didnโt just wanna fuck then leave??? he wanted to cuddle and trace shapes on ur skin,,,, like remember how he always ends up coming back to you,,, is he an asshole??? absolutely,,, but heโs nimi
(i am so sorry,,, i am simply ill with kunimi brainrot)
i love the whole,, he kinda sucks but he rlly is trying idk why maybe cus iโm toxic or love toxic men but ITS HIM U KNOW
sr kunimi please let me show you unconditional and gentle love iโll make you ur fav food when you have a bad day and give you smooches all the time and buy you shirts youd like
i will hold him in my arms for hours if thatโs what he wants
a/n: itโs been awhile since iโve written well.... anything, so this was a bit of a struggle to pick back up but it was also... nice to do? plus this is pickin up a little bit from the tinie angst drab i wrote and i figured itโd be cute to keep up w the time name theme or whatever! hope this isnโt hot garbo <3
dedicated to @bakatenshiiโ again bc she yelled at me for this,, again
set post-timeskip
warnings: slight angst, feelings of jealousy, drunk texting/calling, regret and guilt, a surprise guest, mentions of breakup
read ๐๐:๐๐ here !
Twelve missed calls.ย
Eleven voicemails.
Ten messages from you.ย
He rakes his fingers through tousled, sweaty locks as he squints at his phone, still trying to catch his breath from an intense practice.ย
Itโs only one in the afternoon for him, nearing two. Meaning on the exact other side of the world you were still awake at the ungodly hours that are too late to be considered night and too early to be morning.ย
Thereโs nothing intelligible in the texts, signaling to him your state of sobriety as he chuckles at the drunken mixture of numbers and words that make no sense. Another low laugh escaping as he quirks a brow at your choice of emojis.
He brings his phone to his ear, clicking on the first voicemail left for him.
โTooru~ itโs so late here! B-But early for you, can you believe it? Guess who I saw?โ Your words are slurred, the singsong tone you have on is achingly familiar, serving a reminder of all the times you would lovingly tease him. โMatsu~ kawa~โย
His throat tightens at the thought of you being alone with Mattsun, friend or not he was still a man. One that had an obvious crush back in high school.ย
The first voicemail ends with that tidbit of information, the second and third only a few seconds long and sound more like youโre fumbling with your phone than anything else.
โYouโre so mean Tooru, so cruel to me.โ The next one starts, followed by an exasperated laugh and the words โso cruelโ whispered over and over again. โMattsunโs looking at me like Iโm c-crazy! He knows Iโm calling you, he must, I just, I can believe you left so easily.โย
Oikawa scoffs at the comment about Matsukawa, a crease in his brow forming, paired with his lips pursing at your accusation of his leaving being anything remotely close to easy.ย
โItโs fine, Iโm fine. I hate you.โ You choke on the word โhateโ, mumbling something after the statement that he canโt quite make out, swearing he can hear someone saying your name as the message comes to an end.ย
The next one is only a single second long, and a part of him wishes there were more, a part of him wishes it would stop. For a moment he considers deleting all of them, not wanting to risk the pain of listening and to spare you of the embarrassment. But a gnawing feeling, the same that still makes his heart pound at the sound of you saying his name leaves him tapping on the next voicemail.
โWhy wonโt you answer?โ You cry out, the sound of a crowded bar filling the space between your words, โI just need to know please, I need to know.โย
It ends again, and once more he doesnโt think he can stomach listening to another one of these.ย
โDo you think of me? Do you think of me all the time? Because,โ thereโs a sob, loud and broken that only sends another stabbing pain through his chest, your voice but a shaking whisper that tears at the still beating part of his heart, โbecause I canโt stop, for nearly three years, all I do is think of you.โ
โIt hurts, it hurts so much.โ Your voice shakes and another sharp pain pierces his chest. โWhen does it stop hurting?โ
It doesnโt, it hasnโt for him.
โWhy wonโt you come home?โ A certain rage fills him, selfish, he thinks, thatโs what youโre being. Were you really begging for him to abandon all that heโs worked for? Abandon the future heโs been fighting for since he began pursuing the sport he so loves? The message continues with another sniffle, now clearly hearing Matsukawa say your name.
โHey Captain, Iโm gonna take โem home, don't worry bout it, sorry if too much was said. Guess it was a bad day at work?โ The deep voice is unwelcomed to his ears, the jealousy searing itself across his conscious feels damning. He wants to hate him, hate one of his closest friends all because heโs there by your side.ย
โNo! I want Tooru.โ The voicemail drags along, the sound of Mattsun mumbling something unintelligible eventually has you relenting.
โItโs time to say goodbye.โย
โBye Tooru, I miss you okay? A-And Iโm sorry.โ Your voice shakes,ย
Whatever petty jealousy that filled him burns away, replaced with a familiar guilt that eats away whenever thereโs a lull in his thoughts.ย
His thumb hovers over the call button, what would he say?
I still love you but my life is here now?ย
Or even utter the words that seemed to scream louder and louder in his mind, only making the back of his head throb.
Donโt go with Mattsun?
Thereโs not enough words or excuses in his head that would truly justify him calling, let alone him telling you what you should be doing with your life. He forfeited that right long ago.ย
He resigns himself to sending a short text to Mattsun, something along the lines of thanking him and to keep you safe. He swallows back the bile rising in his throat, ignores the goading whispers in the back of his mind and pretends that everything is still okay.
