One Hell Of A Squire

indie Podrick Payne | semi selective | oc/au/crossover friendly

[undyingloyxlty]

My muse has been horrible as you all know. So I’m going to move ALL OF my muses to @diresurvivors

I’m still setting it up, theme and all. I’m going to get a proper tagging system going. And for a while at least I will be low activity and selective. 

I’ll also have a hiatus coming up July 17- undetermined as I am moving to Sweden to be with my boyfriend and to be independent for the first time ever. While I get settled I will probably be slow af. I say as if I’ve been active

So EVERYTHING IS MOVED TO @diresurvivors !!!!

[wildwclfgirl]

Okay so I woke up and I caught my dad’s stomach virus so I’m sick as a dog. If I feel better later I’ll do some replies on everyone, which I really wanna lol, but there is a good chance I’ll just be laying in bed and sleeping all dsy

[coerulus]

“I’ve never actually killed anyone- but I could if required to, of course.” 

[undyingloyxlty]

Podrick was surprised, though he tried to hide it. "You haven't?" he asked at last. "I didn't know that m'lady. Ser."

[undyingloyxlty]

coerulus:

“I guess I am his only family. Pretty much, anyway.” She was aware of a few distant relatives, but they’d never been any closer through emotion than they were by blood. Selwyn was certainly all she’d had growing up on Malta. Now, though… Brienne had partially expected to end up alone when she moved to England, but she’d ended up with the Starks and Jaime and Podrick…

“Is that right? Wish I’d known that.” She’d been certain she was going to bleed to death in that alley, not found until long after it was too late. From the way Pod told it reinforcements had arrived just after she’d passed out. If it weren’t for the severity of the infection and fever that followed Brienne would feel melodramatic for having had such thoughts. 

“Pod,” she said with as much authority as she could muster. “As your superior I order you to at least go have something to eat. Listen, you- you could also get me a cup of water, if you’d be so kind. Maybe even ask the nurse if I can eat on my own now? We can have dinner together- or lunch? Breakfast…? What time is it?” 

"He'd love you even if you weren't." The answer was quick, easy, true. He knew it. She was important to him, she was important to more people than she knew. “He’d be here even if you weren’t.” 

Pod offered a small attempt at a smile as he said, “it’s over. Biter’s over. You’re gonna be fine. You’re a hero.” He hoped she believed him, hope the words resonated. Because she was a hero.  He made a face at being told to go eat but the moment she asked for water he was on his feet so quickly that he almost knocked his chair over. “Lunch,” he replied swiftly. “I’ll go ask her.”

[undyingloyxlty]

coerulus:

“You’re allowed to just call me Brienne. I told you that before I left, remember? As I told you that I would return.” It was endearing in its way, though, certainly more than the other things she had been called. Brienne had a feeling Pod wouldn’t agree to give up the titles so easily, even if one she’d never earned and one she’d never lived up to. 

“I did,” Brienne murmured, feeling a little worm of shame twist in her stomach. “I ended up telling him what had happened. I did not mean to, but- I’m sorry, Pod. I gambled with your life. My intentions don’t matter.” Jaime had thought they did, though, or he’d probably have left in disgust. “I have you to thank for things working out as they did. To betray someone who trusts you, someone who’s life you’ve saved in the past- that’s unforgivable. To betray someone for the sake of trying to spare a child’s life, however… that is a bit better.” 

She let out a sigh and stayed holding Pod for a few moments, listening to the sounds of the men fade away. It was almost peaceful, but for the bodies surrounding them. Part of her wanted to fall asleep next to them, but she did not buy another chance at life to hide away in a cavern. “Are you hurt? If you’re able I’d like your help to bury Ser Hyle.” She couldn’t think about the other body she’d known. Not yet. 

He remembered, but it seemed strange to call her Brienne. She was a lady, and his ser. He couldn’t ignore that. No squire called their knight by their name, did they? None that he’d seen anyways. But Brienne was more than that. She deserved a title.

Podrick looked up at her for a long moment, confusion rattling through him at her words. She was apologizing? Why? “You... Why? No, you didn’t - don’t say sorry. Ser. M’lady.” He shook his head quickly, as if he could shake off her words. “I did nothing. You saved us from her. You came back, you didn’t have to. You could have stayed away.” He wasn’t sure anyone else would have come back.

“I’m able,” he told her quickly. No one should do it but them. He was theirs. Their... Whatever he had been. Podrick still wasn’t entirely sure, but Ser Hyle had been theirs in some way. That much he knew.

[coerulus]

✖ and yellow or purple! (Payne colors cuz I'm a dork)

[iron-reborn]

I’m so sorry you guys! I had a bad anxiety day then my friend came over and watched Game of Thrones, and now I’m tired af.

Sorry my activity has been so rough but it should start improving tomorrow on!

[undyingloyxlty]

Okay, not only can i not focus but everything is making me beyond agitated which is making me on the verge of tears so I’m off for the day. Tomorrow I’ll be back on my ADHD meds and I can get a lot more done. But for now, I’m off before I lose my mind

[undyingloyxlty]

@coerulus | No reason at all, but I had Mother’s Day feels

Mother’s Day had always been difficult for the boy. Podrick had never had a family, much less a mother. In fact his own mother had abandoned him almost right away. He never understood, but always wanted to have a mother. He wanted someone to love him unconditionally, to hold him, to tell him it was okay and to give him encouragement and praise.

He had hardly left Brienne’s side since Biter had attacked her. But this was different. This was something for her. So he went out while she slept and bought the nicest vase of flowers that he could find before taking it back to the hospital. Pod set the flowers down on the table beside her and rocked on his heels as he desperately wished he had a card for her. But he wasn’t even sure how she would respond to a card. A card would be very clearly for Mother’s Day. She wasn’t his mother. Not really.

“Happy Mother’s Day,” he muttered under his breath, returning to his chair and siting down slowly.

[undyingloyxlty]

When you get this, please respond with five things that make you happy ! Then, send to the last ten people in your notifications anonymously. you never know who might benefit from spreading positivity ! 🌼

Thank you!! So I answered OOC over at @iron-reborn, and I saw someone (i don’t remember who I’m so sorry) do this and I think it’s a really good idea. SO I’m going to list 5 things that make Pod happy

1) any kind of praise- Pod was insanely starved of praise and kindness for most of his life so when he gets it, he is insanely appreciative.

2) Helping- Feeling like he’s been helpful in any way at all is such a quick way to make Podrick smile.

3) Tyrion- Tyrion was the first person to take him under his wing, to treat him like a human. He will never forget it and Tyrion makes Pod insanely happy, except for the fact that he got left.

4)Friends- Pod loves feeling united. He loves feeling like he’s part of something

5) BRIENNE OF TARTH- Brienne makes Pod insanely happy. She’s as close to a mom as he has ever had and probably ever will have. He would do anything for her- cross oceans, fight the Mountain, anything. @coerulus

[undyingloyxlty]

❊  both of them to accidentally fall right into a thorn bush.

Accident Meme | Accepting

He wasn’t sure how it had even happened. He had been walking with Lady Sansa through the courtyard and then... He wasn’t even sure who it was who lost balance first. All he knew was that they were both toppling towards a thorn bush.

Acting on instinct, Pod turned so that he was on the bottom, somewhat shielding her. He groaned as he shifted, moving his head to look at the Stark girl. “Are you alright my lady?” he asked, eyes raking over her for any sign of harm.

[undyingloyxlty]

I don’t think that’s how you pronounce that word, Pod.”

Pod frowned, a blush rising to his cheeks. “It isn’t? How is it then?”

[undyingloyxlty]

“Hey I’m Iyla and my crazy ex-boyfriend is here and I was wondering if you’d pretend to date me so I can get them off my back?”

Pod started, looking up in surprise at the girl. She was pretty to say the least, which only made him more flustered than usual. “Er, I- Su-Sure.” He cleared his throat as he pulled out the stool beside him.

[undyingloyxlty]

@iylamarbrand | Liked for a Starter

The Dreadfort was far from welcoming. After Brienne had left, the brotherhood had not kept their promise. While they didn’t kill him, they sold him to the Boltons. They claimed that if Brienne was true to her quest they would get him back for her, but he wasn’t sure.

Now, Pod found himself stumbling around, completely lost. Flustered was a light word for it. When eh glimpsed a girl, he paused uncertain if he should ask for help or not. People here tended to be vicious and cruel, but she looked nice enough to him.

[sheisrecovering]

Helpful Links:

types of anxiety disorders

what causes anxiety?

calm breathing technique 

coping with a panic attack

counseling: does it work?

four As of stress management

grounding techniques

home tips to reduce anxiety

learning to say no without feeling guilty

ocd help

overcoming chest tightness

medication info

muscle relaxation

trick for social anxiety

rules for coping with anxiety & panic

self help strategies for PTSD

sleep aid kitten

social skills tips

more ptsd help

vitamin deficiency & anxiety

yoga poses for stress relief

12 foods for stress relief

9 steps to reduce anxiousness

Activities and DIY:

alpaca sock plushie

anxiety workbook for teens

anxiety relief - jar spell

calming glitter jar

comfort box

cute stress relief kit

panic workbook

stress relief bath and shower recipes

worksheet: learn to attack unhelpful thoughts

zen and anti stress colouring sheets

Interactives: 

100,000 stars

6 games for anxiety & depression

blahtherapy

boosterbuddy

disgruntle me

do nothing for 2 minutes

emotions wheel

make everything ok

mindshift phone app

neonflames

planetarium

rainymood

stress analyst

the thoughts room

the quiet place project

worry rockets

[undyingloyxlty]

coerulus:

“You can call me Brienne when we’re off-duty, you know. Okay, fine, Yoda is tiny and probably not very strong, but what about the younger Jedi? I’m not the one going through the trouble of lifting rocks with my mind. I’m not overthinking, they’re overthinking.” 

Pod screwed up his face at her comment. Calling her Brienne? That didn’t sound right at all. He sighed and shook his head. “Oh my g- No, see, because-” He heaved a sigh again. “That’s how they practice.”

[coerulus]

@satinflcwers        @undyingloyxlty

WHY ARE MY BOYS FIGHTING

[undyingloyxlty]

I WANNA BE THE FAVORITE, MOM