UnfinishedMe

26. INFJ. Anxiety, eczema, intermittent meditator, piano geek. Lifelong aspiration to become Leslie Knope.

[unfinishedsimphonie]

i am at the end of my rope with you

[unfinishedsimphonie]

i'm running out of patience for people...

[unfinishedsimphonie]

Work is ramping up again and with everything opening up, it’s been a breath of fresh air to finally be able to so things. But i’ve been feeling a overwhelmed or anxious lately? Something i can’t quite put my finger on and i don’t know how to fix it. Somehow like my introverted self found a lot of peace during the pandemic and now that things are opening up again and i guess i’m hitting the stressful part of the cycle at work, i feel like i’m losing my footing a little bit. I’m afraid to fall.

[unfinishedsimphonie]

I deserve better

[unfinishedsimphonie]

I’ve been so happy lately i can’t sleep

[unfinishedsimphonie]

Idk if its because i’ve working on myself or because my health is finally cooperating or because of the breakup. I am just so so happy today. I had a ton of fun and i’m not anxious about the fact that maybe it won’t last or worrying about the future. I feel like today i lived just for today and it felt so truly peaceful.

[unfinishedsimphonie]

we dated for more than a year. i guess it’s fair that it’ll take more than 2 weeks to get over this. i miss him so much

[unfinishedsimphonie]

i'm feeling these desperate feelings of wanting to be with you because i miss you so much. I keep trying to distract myself with other plans but they don't make this feeling go away. But maybe i should recognize the feelings for what they are. An ache of missing you, and just be okay with feeling these feelings without trying to do anything to change them.

[unfinishedsimphonie]

I miss him so much and i’ve been getting through this with the support of friends and excessively working out. But i need to find a way to just be comfortable with myself.

[unfinishedsimphonie]

I am sad again tonight even though i thought i was okay. I can’t really pinpoint why except that i just miss him. But i guess its okay to be sad. I should know that this isn’t linear.

I guess at least a good excuse to keep treating myself...

[yama-dharma-incarnation]

Arvo Pärt - even if I lose everything (2015) Documentary

Namu Amida Butsu

[inloveandfear-deactivated202505]

I love saying “my brain went” instead of “I thought” because idk what’s going on up there sometimes I just live here

[soundlessdragon]

Thoughts are things that just happen to me. Then I choose if I want to ride that train or abandon ship

[unfinishedsimphonie]

I am feeling so much gratitude and happiness in my heart for this life that i have. I have excitement for the future where i think i used to have dread and anxiety. I think the most wholeheartedly selfless thing he has ever done for me was letting me go.

[unfinishedsimphonie]

not sure if breakup or vaccine but i am feeling so excited for life

[unfinishedsimphonie]

i think i'm now at that point that i know what i need to do. i'm scared but i'm getting closer.

[unfinishedsimphonie]

I’ve been wracking my brain trying to figure out what i did to cause this flare. Intent on the idea that I shouldn’t have to suffer because i should be able to figure it out and that there is an answer.

I always forget that there is something just wrong with my body and no matter how hard i try, i will always have flare ups that i can’t control. Every time this happens, i am so resistant to western medicine because i fear the side effects and the long term implications. And i insist on figuring it out myself until i’ve pushed my body to its limit. So maybe i’m not doing what’s best for myself.

I guess this is just a reminder to be gentle and forgiving with myself. Because self blame for a problem that is truthfully out of my control really doesn’t help.

[mothcub]

Wearing a huge t-shirt in the house… that’s fashion baby