can’t shake the devil sitting on my shoulder @ununhexium - Tumblr Blog

in the middle of a deep hard dicking down as i was riiiight about to cum my silly little brains out,…my (extremely handsome) butch grabbed me, leaned down, and whispered so sweetly in my ear “i’m going to fucking marry you, you know that?” + buried themself as deep as they could. i felt my entire brain chemistry being rewritten. im literally fundamentally altered. im gonna think abt this for the rest of my life and probably every lifetime ever. i think my brain leaked out of my ears. is it possible to win the entire month of pride? happy pride to me only i guess im so sorry everyone else it’s OVERRRR lmao

#fucking diabolical #this is just like when they scissored me for the first time ever and i literally lost sleep over it #so fucking good it’s offensive. i’m like mad at them #i love butch lesbians i love being gay #and i LOOOVEEEE MY BUTCH!!!! SCREAM IT FROM THE ROOFTOPS ETC ETC #LITERALLY NOOOO ONE HAS IT AS GOOD AS ME RN #like at this point i feel badly for anyone who hasn’t been loved by a butch quite simply there is nothing like it #not mine tho mines locked in i did nothing to earn it but boy am i grateful #un.text

i never ever want to leave rapid city i never want to leave south dakota and im crying already because i only have a day left here. im never so happy as i am with my friend out here. im better out here im better im better and i dont want to go back

#i miss my girlfriend but like. enough to leave this behind? idk.#i hate how good my friend and i are at coexisting too. it’s just easy #un.text

femmeunicornprincess

Butch with lucky you jeans involve me NOW

she2real

signing a lease tomorrow moving states to be with my handsome butch yippee!! if this bites me in the ass i will nuke the planet btw

#surely i’m not dumb enough to make the same mistake. SURELY #un.text

there has to be some sort of correlation between my usage of this platform and my mental health. like i only really seriously post when im going through something Big and i wish i could just use it recreationally and for fun like i used to instead of a glorified journal but i just like, can’t anymore. kind of a bummer but at least in this era im doing okay! my dog is happy and healthy, im moving to philly(ish), i return to my beloved dakotas soon, my relationship is stable and gay and joyous.

i do have this great and unshakeable paranoia that my partner is just settling because we’re both big ages but that’s honestly a problem for future me. if it doesn’t work it doesn’t work. it’ll be devastating but not the end of the world. plan b if i get dumped unceremoniously (again) is to fuck off to the midwest and either way i’ll have saved some money by moving in together even if it doesn’t end in marriage. i want it to, like, desperately, but also i am not going to pretend that is the only outcome.

i also need to see if i can be happy on the east coast (is it just nj i have a problem with and philly will be fine or is the beef truly coastal) before i can commit to being like “yes ill stay here forever”. so TBD!

we’ll see. i think between moving states switching jobs new person & creatures to live with etc come fall i WILL be crashing out because im completely uprooting my life for a “we’re gonna try rly hard to make it work out!” which is stupid but i have no other options sooooo. i just wonder what on earth my stupid eating disorder will do when i actually have to live with another person considering ive been fully on my bullshit for a whole year now. what am i gonna do at this point tho. go to treatment? LMFAOOO

#gonna have to go back to regular schmegular restricting instead of the stupidity of b/p i guess #they’d break up with me if they knew how bad it was tho sooooo #we stay pretending to be normalllll #un.text

nails-in-the-header

The Cramps, I Was A Teenage Werewolf

seabeck

Bald faced

angelicbrats

lesbian thoughts → lesbian thoughts ↓ ↑ lesbian thoughts ← lesbian thoughts

dailyrothko

Mark Rothko Untitled 1969 Acrylic on watercolor paper mounted on hardboard 24 1/8 x 18 3/16 in. (61.3 x 46.2 cm) The Israel Museum, Jerusalem, Gift of The Mark Rothko Foundation, Inc., 1985B85.0644. © Kate Rothko Prizel and Christopher Rothko Photo © The Israel Museum, Jerusalem by Elie Posner

A cool, characteristically dark late Rothko on paper. Just the kind I like.